by CE Kilgore
Standing away from the rail, he crosses his arms over his chest. “And what if I say no?”
For a moment, the world comes out from under my boots, but I hold off the anxiety. I fight back for Charlotte, because she deserves a man who would fight for her. “Well, sir, as much as I respect you, I’d marry her anyway, if she’ll have me.”
With a step forward, his big hand claps my shoulder. “Right answer, son. You’ve got my blessing, and I’m pretty sure Carol’s already pickin’ out fabric for the crib she asked me to start buildin’ this mornin’.”
“And I thought Texans didn’t waste time,” I laugh past my relieved nerves. “Carol was just telling Charlotte she expects two grandkids sooner than later.”
“Two?” John scoffs. “Now, I’m not a greedy man, but I think four sounds like a nice number. Then again, I was one of six, and my momma said it was a perfect count.”
“S-s-six,” I stutter because my brain is throwing a damn party and John is laughing hard along with the goats.
“Shoot, son, breathe!” The man is doubled over, slapping his knee with one hand while he taps my back with the other. “C’mon, son. Let’s get inside before those three girls corner Brandon with the adoption pamphlets Carol picked up last week.”
“Seriously?” I suck in a breath as we head back to the house.
Emma can’t have kids the natural way and Brandon has hinted at adoption, but I don’t know if the man is actually ready. Then again, who is? I’m also not sure how kids would fit into our lifestyle, but I guess that’s something we’re all going to have to figure out eventually, especially since Carol seems to be on the warpath for grandkids, one way or another.
“No joke,” John confirms as we step into the kitchen. “The woman is on a mission, and when she gets something in her head, their aint no stoppin’ her.”
“Sounds familiar,” I quip then stop short as Brandon jogs down the stairs with the girls close on his heels.
“We’ve got a problem,” he looks to me. “They found Saul. He’s at Dallas General with two bruised ribs and a concussion.”
“The hell?” I glance between him and Charlotte. “What happened?”
“Forester,” Brandon growls. The man actually growls out the name, his hand clenching around his cellphone. “Saul aint pressing charges due to a lack of witnesses, but he recognized two of Forester’s crew in the crowd that corned him outside of the Desert Rose.”
“Shit,” I curse. “What the heck was he doing in a dump like that, after we’ve been looking for him for three damn days.”
“That isn’t the only problem,” Charlotte cuts in. She has Emma in her arms and they both look worried. “Austin’s gone huntin’ after Forester.”
“John, Carol,” Brandon’s talking as he’s putting his jacket back on. “I’m sorry, but I’ve gotta get back down to Dallas and try to take care of this mess before more of my friends get hurt.”
“Go with him, sweetie,” Charlotte’s pushed through and is zipping my jacket up. “Keep him outta trouble for Emma, okay? And make sure that fool Austin doesn’t land himself back in jail.”
“Okay,” I don’t want to leave her, but Brandon and the others need me. Her eyes tell me she understands my conflict. After kissing her, I glance apologetically to Carol and John then kiss Charlotte again. And again. And again. “I’ll try and be back by Midnight Mass tomorrow.”
“Be careful.” She kisses me twice more, putting me more at ease. “I love you.”
“I love you,” I finger her hair then follow Brandon out the door, both of us cursing Forester under our breaths as we get into his car. “If you get tired, let me drive. I’ve been asleep with Charlotte most of today.”
“You look like John just took you through the ringer.”
“Six.”
“Hmm?” Brandon glances over at me.
“Six kids. That was John’s suggestion.”
“Holy shit! You got his blessing?” He’s grinning again despite the shit storm we’re about to drive into. “Congrats, man. So, when are you gonna ask her?”
“Well, tonight had been a possibility,” I grouse. Fucking Forester. When I find him…
“Sorry,” Brandon sighs heavily while flipping on the defroster. “I feel like this is all my fault, including Charlie losing her job.”
“It’s not. Forester is an egotistical prick. I figured there would be some backlash over losing that factory and the investigation into his brother at County. Going after Charlotte, though… and now Saul?”
“The man’s asking for a body cast,” Brandon glares at the road. He’s not a violent man, but he could easily take on Forester. I think he’s reaching the end of his ‘nice guy’ patience, too. His hands hit against the steering wheel. “He’s threatened my business, my club, and now my family.”
“The guy thinks he owns Dallas. Bribery, undercutting the jobs, blackmail.” The more I think about it, the more worried I get. “And now he’s become violent.”
“Stupid is more like it,” Brandon mutters. “Which makes him dangerous.”
The road passes under us on the long stretch of highway, dark cattle pastures and cut wheat fields blurring by. My brain is counting the white, reflective mile markers while my heart focuses on how each one is taking me farther away from Charlotte. I wonder what her parents make of all this. What kind of man am I for their daughter who is involved in this kind of bullshit?
Brandon has always run a clean constructions business. No grey lines when it comes to legality, no cutting corners and no poaching or threatening the other crews. Anyone knows that a prosperous construction company in a big city like Dallas is going to raise some greedy eyebrows, but Brandon’s company has also gained respect. Respect isn’t a concept Forester seems to understand.
Maybe it’s time we schooled the man in proper business ethics.
“I have an idea, boss.” I keep counting the mile markers, knowing Brandon and I are about to have an argument. “But you aren’t going to like it.”
Charlotte
As soon as Ian’s gone, I feel the cold creeping back in. My hands rub my arms as a chill shimmies up my spine. Glancing over at my dad’s questioning eyes, the chill freezes into frostbite.
“What’s all this about?” he asks, looking between me and Emma. “A man getting beat up? Another boy might be going back to jail? Are Ian and Brandon in some kina trouble?”
“Daddy,” I start, not sure how to finish.
Emma gives my arm a squeeze and nods. My parents offered me honesty this morning. Perhaps I owe them some honesty of my own. I’m afraid it will change how they feel about Ian and Brandon, but all I can do is hope my parents are as understanding as they’ve raised me to be.
I motion towards the couch and chairs that face each other and we all take a seat. “Brandon’s construction company is doing really well and has been getting a lot of big contracts. Michael Forester is one of Brandon’s competitors, and he don’t play by the rules.”
“He doesn’t like that we got Shoe Village back,” Emma adds.
“That development you emailed me those pictures of, sweetie?” Momma asks and Emma nods.
“It’s our dream,” Emma smiles, giving a tiny flicker of light back to the room as her reply is whispered with the caress of love. “Mine and Brandon’s. Forester tried to steal it, but Kyle and Ian saved it.”
I share Emma’s smile, thinking about the work Ian has done to help make the dream a reality, then turn back to my parents. “Michael had a brother, Matt, who worked for Dallas County. Matt used to pull favors, slip work through unapproved and basically ensure Michael got dibs on properties without having to even file the paperwork. He got Forester the old shoe factory property unfairly, but Ian helped Brandon get it back.”
I can hear the pride for Ian on my voice as I share the details I’ve gathered over the months. “Ian works part time for the city as a code inspector and claims investigator. He went through all the old bids from Forester and found disc
repancies, faked reports, invalid inspections and accounting practices that didn’t make any sense. Now Michael’s brother at the County office has been put on leave and under investigation for fraud. Needless to say, Michael aint too pleased with Brandon or Ian.”
“So he’s beating people up?” my dad is rubbing his chin, and I can see he’s not happy his little girls might be mixed up in some sort of trouble.
“And getting people fired,” I grumble, then curse my big mouth as my momma asks what I mean. “Forester’s been following Brandon’s people, including Ian. Ian thinks Forester told the University some information that led to my dismissal.”
“That’s outrageous!” My mom shakes her head. “You have to fight that, since it’s obviously all lies.”
I look away from my momma’s eyes to try and hide my guilt. “An attorney friend of theirs is already working on it for me.”
“Well,” my daddy’s stare continues to bore into my soul. “If you’re sure it’s this Forester, why doesn’t that boy… Saul, was it? Why doesn’t he press charges, then?”
“It’s a little complicated,” I squirm into the couch cushion.
“Charlotte Susanna,” Daddy warns in fatherly worry, “you best be comin’ clean about whatever’s got your rear on fire.”
“Yes, sir,” I bit my bottom lip. “Saul is trying to protect Brandon, because Forester is blackmailing him.”
“Blackmail?” my mom gasps. “Is Brandon doing something illegal? Is that why Austin was in jail?”
“No,” Emma answers first, her chin raised defiantly. “Brandon does nothing illegal. He helps people, including Austin, who was put in jail for stealing from him.”
That’s news to me and I blink at Emma in surprise. “Really?”
“Austin was in a gang, but only because he was stupid.” Her bluntness isn’t surprising. That’s just the way Emma is.
“One night,” she continues, “the gang came across Brandon in a parking garage and decided to steal his car. Brandon fought back, and they started beating Brandon with bats. Austin tried to stop it, then they got caught. Brandon asked the judge to give Austin leniency, and now Austin is on probation under Brandon’s guardianship. Austin is good like Brandon. He just made some stupid choices that he’s trying to set right.”
I take up as Emma stops talking, trying to ease the worry in my parent’s eyes for the type of men Emma is living with. “Austin really is a good guy. He’s been taking care of Emma as if she were his sister. I can’t picture that boy hurting anyone, especially not Emma. He’s completely devoted to Brandon and the club.”
“The club?” Daddy’s eyebrow quirks up.
Shit. Well, it had to come out eventually. Though, having a talk about BDSM with my parents was never on my to-do list. “Yeah. See, Brandon has two businesses – his construction company and a private members’ club he runs on weekends from his estate. Forester is threatening the construction company by blackmailing Brandon about the club. Forester is threatening to make the club public.”
“A private, members only club,” my dad slowly states and I can see the gears in his head turning. “What kina club could have Brandon afraid to go public? Is it like a gentleman’s club?”
“Not exactly,” I bit my bottom lip again.
“There are no paid women,” Emma jumps in as I fidget under my dad’s stare. “No prostitution. No gambling. Nothing illegal. It’s all mutual participation.”
“Mutual participation?” my momma repeats, looking lost.
Our parents share confused glances, so I cut right to it. “It’s a BDSM lifestyle club. You know, bondage and… domination, submission… and…” I cough at the end through the word ‘masochism’.
“Charlotte Susanna!” my mother claps her hands over her mouth as my full name is used yet again.
Wonderful, I’m on a roll today. Jobless. Sexual deviant. Murderer.
No. I didn’t kill Mary Lynn, and losing my job was not my fault!
It shocks me to hear my own mental voice arguing against the blame I would normally accept without question. I think it’s time I really did stop running and learned to stand up for myself.
Mom’s eyes go wide and my dad’s mouth hangs open for a second, but I hold up my hand before he can say anything. “I know what you’re thinking, and trust me, I had those exact same thoughts going through my head, too. But, there’s no dungeon or blacked-out windows. It’s more like a country club, really, except they don’t play golf.”
“Pumpkin, I can’t rightly describe the thoughts going through my head at the moment.” My daddy’s face looks a little dazed. He also looks a might bit angry.
“Daddy,” I sigh, “that’s why Brandon hasn’t told you yet. He knew it’d be asking a lot for you to understand our lifestyle choice.”
“Our?” My momma highlights my slip with another loud gasp. “Charlotte! Are you… involved with… with… that?!”
I guess I am, and maybe it’s time I took ownership of it. “I am, and so is Ian.”
“Me, too,” Emma adds. “We’re a family that supports each other. It’s about sharing, teaching and learning. It’s about community. It’s not wrong,” she raises her chin again to stare off with my dad, “and it’s nothing to be ashamed about.”
“B-b-but,” my momma’s mouth appears to be broken.
Reaching over, I put my hand on her knee. “Momma, I love Ian and Ian loves me, unconditionally. Just because we choose to do this on the weekends doesn’t change who we are. It’s something we share. It’s no different than… than going square dancing together.”
She blinks at me and I laugh. “Okay, so it’s a little different than square dancing, but it still doesn’t change who we are.” My eyes move to my dad. “It doesn’t change who Ian is.”
My dad stands and paces the room once. Twice. Then he stops, hands fisted, and looks at me. “Is that why you lost your job?”
The second shoe drops with a loud, ear-splitting thud. “Yes, I think so.”
His eyes darken. A storm’s coming. “So, you’re willing to risk everything – everything you’ve worked so hard for – for some club?”
Standing up, I match his stance. “No. I’m willing to risk everything for Ian and my second family.”
“Our family.” Emma stands beside me, taking my hand. “John, Carol – I know I can’t always show that I love you, but I do. I’m grateful to you for everything you have ever done for me. I also love Brandon and my other family. Ian, Austin and everyone else. Everyone at that club.”
“They depend on secrecy exactly because of the way you’re reacting right now,” I add. “And for the same reason I lost my job.”
No, that’s not true. Ian’s right. I’m not to blame for that, and neither is he.
“Hell, I didn’t lose anything! My job was taken away from me unfairly because some stuffy Dean disagrees with my lifestyle choice, as if it’s any of his damn business!”
“But, Charlotte,” Daddy is trying to find some reason to hold on to that will let him talk me outta what he thinks is wrong. “It’s just not right!”
“Why?” I argue right back. “What’s wrong about it? I’m a grown woman, Daddy! You just said this mornin’ that I’m a strong woman you were proud of. Does doin’ this make me any less strong? Does it make you less proud a’ me? Does lovin’ Ian and sharin’ this with him take all that away?”
“No, but, dammit, it’s just…” His hand passes roughly through his hair.
“Does it make Ian a bad person?” I continue while I’m still fired up. I’ve never yelled at my daddy before, but I’m not gonna back down about this. I know Emma’s right. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. “Has he suddenly lost your approval because we’re a little different?”
“Now, that’s not fair,” he huffs.
“Why?” I push further as he starts to back down. “I think it’s a fair question. Are we gonna be judged because of the way we spend one night a week? Because of the way we choose to love each other?
!”
“You’re my little girl!” He’s yelling now, too.
“And that’s never gonna change, Daddy!” I yell right back.
“Are you happy?”
Momma’s question stops our argument and we both look at her. I can tell she’s trying to take it all in, but she’s managed to ask the most important question. I give her the only answer I can – the one straight from my heart.
I kneel down in front of her chair and take her hand in mine. She’s looking at me like she always has, as if I’m the most precious thing in the world, but there’s something else there now. It’s like, for the first time, she’s seeing the woman I’ve become, and she’s doing her best to accept all that I am.
Beyond the worry, all I see is unconditional love. “Momma, I’m happier than I’ve ever been.”
She looks into my eyes for a long moment, determining the truth of my words, then nods. “Then, that’s all that matters to me.” She glances up at Daddy with a stern edge to her voice, daring him to argue. “That’s all that should ever matter to a parent, right sweetie?”
My daddy’s mouth opens and closes a few times, but I can see his puffed up chest deflating. The anger in his eyes cools, but the worry is still there. “But, Carol… I just gave that boy my blessing. Are you okay with that?”
My heart stops. Blessing? Blessing for what, exactly?
“I have to be, John,” my momma replies, “because blessing or not, Ian is a good man and Charlotte loves him… and when he asks, you and I both know what her answer will be.”
Oh, mercy. The room spins and my ass is back on the couch, Emma guiding me down while Momma pats my knee. Ian must’ve asked my daddy’s permission to propose.
“I…” Daddy’s voice wavers. He lets out a harsh sigh then he’s heading back to the kitchen and out the screen door. “I got some thinkin’ to do.”
Momma frowns as he departs but offers me a smile. “He just needs time to take it all in, that’s all. He’s ornery and old. Set in his ways, like me. I don’t approve of it, for either of my two little angles, but I can also see you’re both not little anymore. As women, you have every right to make your own choices about your bodies, just as long as they’re being respected.”