by Mel Sherratt
Cathy grimaced. How could this still happen? There were supposed to be laws to protect the young innocents but every time she opened a newspaper, every time she switched on a radio or television, she’d hear about another victim. She wished she had enough money and a bigger house to help them all.
‘I meant what I said,’ she reiterated, knowing that she had to get the message across. ‘It wasn’t your fault. This was some pathetic, useless bastard of a man who used and abused a child for his own purposes.’
‘I – I should have stopped him.’
‘You were raped.’ Cathy reached across the table for her hand and gave it a squeeze. But Becky pulled it away.
‘No! I let him do those things. Don’t you see? I let him do it to me again and again and again. He said… he said it was all I was good for.’
‘Did you ever talk to your dad about it?’
Becky paused, her memory flicking back to the night she had left her family home. The night she saw her dad pretending to be asleep. She shook her head.
‘I didn’t think he’d believe me.’
She started to cry then, her sobs ringing around the kitchen, getting into the bones of both women. Cathy rushed around to her and it was in her arms that she finally gave in.
‘It was horrible. And every time I think of my baby, I think of what he did to me. That’s why I was punished. That’s why I lost my baby!’
‘It wasn’t your fault.’ Cathy held her close. ‘You had no control over things. You were taken advantage of, clear and simple.’
‘No… I…’ Becky’s words became inaudible.
‘It wasn’t your fault. And it will never happen to you again. Do you hear me? Never!’
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Eleven thirty that night, Cathy was curled up on the settee. The television was on in the background: she hadn’t watched it since switching it on an hour ago when Jess had come in. Rose had come to her rescue at eight thirty, arriving on the doorstep with a hug and a welcome bottle of wine. Becky had been in her room for most of the night. Cheryl wasn’t in yet though.
Even though she’d talked it through with Rose, Cathy was still disturbed by Becky’s revelations that morning. She’d thought she’d heard it all over the past three years but what Becky finally told her had been really shocking. How could her father condone what was happening? Her own uncle was abusing her while, it seemed to Cathy, reading between the lines, her father knew perfectly well what was going on. How could he let someone, his brother, violate his daughter? And from such an early age, and for so long. No wonder Becky had been hard to crack since she’d arrived. First her mum had died, then her granny. Since then, it didn’t seem like she’d had anyone to trust. Plus she also carried with her the fear that no one would believe her even if she did confide in someone.
Cathy recalled how it had shocked Liz too. She’d caught her crying an hour later, wondering how Becky’s father could have turned a blind eye. Put his child at risk. Cathy had to agree. If he were standing in front of her now, she would gouge his eyes out. No, more than that, she’d like to knee him in the balls and then ram her elbow in his back. Then, while he was on his knees, she’d like to kick him in the face as hard as she could. Then she’d cut off his brother’s dick with something serrated, taking her time to extend the pain.
In reality, what she really wanted to do was contact Becky’s father and get her uncle charged with rape of a minor. It was obvious to her now that he hadn’t been in touch because of the problems it would cause. His brother would be known as a sex offender. Becky would be dragged home and most probably through the courts as well.
But, Cathy sighed and stretched her arms high above her head, it wasn’t up to her. It was Becky’s choice and she’d chosen not to do anything. Put it all behind her now that the baby had gone. Poor kid. Maybe there was something else she could do for her. She would put her thinking cap on and see what she could come up with.
When Rich had died three years ago, part of Cathy had died with him. She knew that looking after these women gave her a purpose to continue. But the worry it caused her sometimes became too much.
‘Am I doing the right thing by these girls, Rich?’ she whispered into the room. ‘Do I do enough for them? Or is it what they do for me? I hate myself for what I did. I gave up on Simon. Why did I do that, Rich? Why?’
Cathy sat in silence, waiting for an answer that wouldn’t come. But she knew the reason why she did this. It was because she would never turn her back on another person.
It was nearing the end of May and it had been a while since Liz had seen or heard from Kevin. Cathy kept thinking that every extra day he kept away was a bonus. After the notes however, which she still hadn’t mentioned to her, she doubted that he would leave things be. Even so the banging on the door that evening took them both by surprise.
Liz jumped up from the settee. ‘Oh God, he’s here again. What am I going to do?’
‘Liz!’ Kevin rapped hard on the living room window next. He cupped his hands and peered through. ‘I can see you! Get your arse out here, right NOW!’
Cathy opened the front window slightly. ‘I thought we’d seen the last of you. What do you want this time?’
‘Keep out of this, you interfering bitch.’
‘Oh, please, if I had a pound for every time someone called me that, I’d be worth a small fortune now. Go home.’
‘You can’t keep her from me forever.’
‘I don’t want to talk to you,’ Liz said, appearing at Cathy’s side.
Kevin held up Chloe’s bike. ‘I’ve come to bring this actually. My Chloe loved this.’
‘Men often do this,’ Cathy whispered to Liz. ‘Bring something for the child to make the mother feel guilty. Leave it on the front then,’ she shouted to Kevin. ‘I’ll get it later.’
‘No, I want to give it to her.’
‘She’s in bed,’ said Liz. ‘I’ll come and get it.’
Cathy closed the window. ‘I’ll go. He might be playing the wounded father but he is still capable of hurting you.’ She pressed the red emergency call-out button at the side of the telephone unit. ‘Let’s see if there’s anyone on shift that can help us first.’
Kevin banged on the window again. ‘Liz!’ he yelled. ‘Where are you? What are you doing in there?’
‘I’m coming!’
‘Liz, wait!’ Cathy cried.
But Liz was out of the front door before she had time to pull her back.
Kevin threw the bike down onto the ground and grabbed her arms. ‘You think you can say what you like because you’re hiding in there, don’t you?’ he hissed.
‘Let her go!’ said Cathy.
Kevin forced Liz to her knees. ‘Back off,’ he told Cathy. ‘You’re nothing without the stick.’
‘I can get it if you want to meet it again. My stick loves cowards. Now get your hands off her.’
‘I’ll do as I wish.’ Kevin leered at Liz.
‘Let go!’ said Liz. ‘You’re hurting me!’
‘I –’
‘Dad!’ Chloe screamed as she appeared in the doorway. She ran across the garden, arms out in front, her pink nightdress flailing around her legs. ‘Leave my mum alone.’
At the sight of his daughter, Kevin let go of Liz immediately. Chloe ran into her arms and burst into tears. Liz held on to her tightly.
‘Hey.’ Kevin bent down to Chloe’s level. ‘Me and Mum were only fooling around.’ He opened his arms wide. ‘Haven’t you got a kiss for your old dad?’
‘Get lost,’ sobbed Chloe. ‘I’m not a baby. I know you’re trying to hurt Mum and I won’t let you.’
‘Christ, what have you been telling her? She can’t be scared of me. I’m her father.’
‘I haven’t said anything to her,’ said Liz, truthfully.
‘She’s old enough to see things for what they are,’ added Cathy.
‘Yes, but –’
‘Go away!’ shouted Chloe. ‘I hate you. You hurt my mum.’
Cathy glanced towards the road as a police car stopped at the kerb. Moments later, PC Mark White got out of it.
‘You called the cops!’ Kevin glared at Cathy. ‘What the hell did you do that for?’
‘You can’t keep coming around and threatening her. Liz has to move on with her life and so do you.’
‘Like hell I do.’ Deciding to change tactics, Kevin walked slowly towards Liz. ‘Please come home. Listen to me. I’m nothing without you. I’ll change.’
‘You said that last time.’
‘But I promise! I’ll do whatever you want me to do. I’ll –’
‘– stop bothering her.’ Mark came through the gate. ‘That would be a good place to start. Hi, Cathy, nice evening.’
‘It was until he showed up.’ Cathy smiled, relieved to see Mark standing in her garden. ‘I wonder if you might sort out a little problem we have.’
‘I don’t know why she called you,’ Kevin pointed a finger at Cathy, ‘but there was no reason to. I’m having a quiet conversation with my wife and then I’m going home.’ This time he looked pointedly at Liz. ‘Alone again.’
‘Do you want to go with him?’ Mark spoke to Liz.
Liz shook her head. Chloe was still holding on to her for dear life, her tiny frame shaking as she sobbed.
‘Then I think you’d better call it a night.’ Mark indicated the gate with a nod of his head. ‘Be on your way.’
‘I’m not going yet,’ said Kevin. ‘I don’t see why I should.’
‘You’ll have to stay outside all night then.’ Cathy walked over to join Liz and Chloe. ‘Because we’re all going in now, aren’t we?’
Liz nodded. ‘Come on, Chloe. Let’s get you back into that warm bed of yours.’
But Chloe clung to Liz’s waist. ‘Not until he goes.’
‘Chloe!’ Kevin reached out to touch her but Chloe screamed. She continued to scream until he held up his hands. ‘Okay, okay, I’m going.’
‘Finally, he gets the message,’ Cathy said sarcastically. ‘And I wouldn’t bother coming back too soon either. If at all.’
‘You can’t stop me.’
‘You’re right.’ PC White reached for his notepad. He walked to the gate and pointed to a blue car. ‘Is this his?’ When Cathy nodded, he noted down the number plate and then addressed Kevin again. ‘I can’t stop you, but a harassment order can. And I think I have enough evidence to get one against you. You’re harassing your wife, you’re scaring your daughter and you’re making a general nuisance of yourself in the street.’ He glanced around. ‘There are three people that I can see watching what’s going on.’
‘That’s because they’re all nosy bastards.’
‘Swear again and I’ll lock you up. You might be able to get away with it when I’m not here but now that I am, you can add breach of the peace to your list, if you’re not careful. Now, move! I want you out of this street or I’ll arrest you.’
‘I’m going,’ Kevin snapped.
Cathy shook her head as she followed Liz indoors. What the hell had got into her? Stupid woman, putting herself in danger like that.
As soon as she came downstairs again after settling Chloe, Cathy ripped into her.
‘The next time he comes here – because there will be a next time,’ she told her angrily, ‘I don’t want you to go running out to him. You know what he’s capable of. Whatever possessed you?’
‘Sorry.’ Liz wouldn’t look at her.
‘I have an alarm system for a reason. I have back up from the police for a reason. When I say do not go outside, I mean do NOT go outside. That should never have happened. You put yourself in danger.’
‘You don’t know him like I do. He won’t give in until he’s done what he came to do. He would have been outside all night if I hadn’t gone out to him.’
‘No, he wouldn’t. The police would have moved him on. Instead you let Chloe see him attack you. Mark’s right. You should think about getting a harassment order or you’re never going to get rid of him.’
‘Don’t you think he’ll get tired of it soon?’
‘I don’t know,’ she replied. ‘I thought he’d gone when he stayed away for so long since the last time. Now he’s back on the scene. Unless something drastic is done, he’ll do it all the time.’
‘I should never have said anything to him.’
‘No, you shouldn’t have.’
‘I – I just felt brave because I thought he couldn’t get at me. Now I’ve antagonised him again, I’ve left myself open.’
Cathy could see how upset Liz was so she held her tongue. ‘I’m – oh, God, what’s that racket now?’
Cathy and Liz followed the noise to its source. There were loud bangs coming from Becky’s room. When Cathy opened the door, she saw Becky standing on the roof outside her window. She was pummelling on the glass.
‘Cathy!’ Becky banged hard again. ‘Cathy, let me in!’
‘Be quiet, will you!’ Cathy pushed up the window and reached for her arm. ‘I thought you were already in here.’
‘Nope… I snuck out.’
‘Can’t I ever have a night of peace?’ She managed to pull Becky through the window.
‘That bitch!’ Becky slurred, pointing at the window sill. ‘I left a book there, so I could get in again. She must have moved it.’ She peered down at the floor, swaying as she tried to remain upright.
‘What are you wittering on about?’ Cathy sat her down on the side of the bed.
‘That Jess. I left the window open.’
Cathy wafted her hand in front of her face. ‘What have you been drinking? And more to the point, where did you get the money from?’
‘Who needs money when I have pockets?’ Becky laughed at her own joke. She pointed to her jeans. ‘I have biiiiiiiiiiggg pockets, Cathy.’
Cathy sighed. ‘Let’s get you into bed before you do anything else.’
‘I shagged Pete Freeman tonight. Around the back of the old White Lion.’ Becky waggled her little finger. ‘That’s what I think of Pete Freeman. What a weenie.’
Cathy wanted to tell her that she shouldn’t be having sex yet, that it was too soon after the miscarriage, but she knew Becky wouldn’t take anything in. Instead, she pulled off her shoes while Liz removed her jacket. They tried to get her into bed but Becky had other ideas. She began to sing.
‘Baby you’re the one. You still turn me on. You can lick my hole again!’
‘Becky, that’s enough,’ Cathy scolded.
Behind them, they heard Chloe giggle.
Liz went to her. ‘You should be in bed, young lady, or I’ll never get you up for school in the morning.’
‘Chloe?’ said Becky, trying to focus on the small figure standing in the doorway. ‘Chloe, is that you?’
‘Hiya, Becks,’ Chloe said before being whisked away by Liz.
‘Chloe, don’t let the boys touch you. They’ll do evil things to you and fu –’
‘Becky! That’s enough now. Show some respect. Chloe is just a child.’
‘But you said I was only a child, didn’t you?’ Becky stopped. Suddenly the drunken giggles turned to tearful wails. ‘You mean baby, don’t you? My baby, I lost my baby. Cathy, Cathy, why did I lose my baby?’
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Cathy always enjoyed her time at the community house, both in The Den with the teenagers and helping out with the adult courses. It was a time when she felt she could leave all her cares and worries behind at the front door, for a few hours at least. She’d usually be too busy to think about anybody else.
Out of everything, she enjoyed the self-assertiveness courses best. She loved to see someone change from a caterpillar into a butterfly as the weeks
attending the courses flew by. Some sessions were for anyone to attend but some were purely for the women to discuss and share their different stories. Sometimes they were harrowing; sometimes inspiring. So wherever possible, she and Josie would ensure there was a bit of light-hearted fun within a serious message. This week there’d been a volunteer teaching the women simple self-defence moves.
‘I wasn’t really expecting to learn anything,’ Josie said afterwards as she and Cathy tidied up the room. ‘But you never know when you might have to defend yourself in day-to-day life.’
‘I don’t often go out after dark, if I can help it.’ Cathy stacked a chair on top of a pile underneath the window. ‘But some of those things would be useful if I didn’t feel safe.’
‘And there were so many tips. I particularly liked the one where she said to yell fire if you felt threatened. How many people would come running then rather than if you just screamed?’
‘Do you need any help in here, ladies?’ Matt popped his head around the door.
‘I think we can manage to move a few tables,’ Josie teased. ‘After what we’ve been taught, we no longer feel the weaker sex, do we, Cathy?’
Cathy grinned.
‘Oh, you’ve been to the self-defence class. Tell me more.’ Matt came into the room. ‘You have me intrigued.’
Josie gathered together two plastic cups that had been left on a table and put them in the bin. ‘Shall we show him what we’ve learned?’
Cathy pursed her lips, trying to stop the grin from looking maniacal. How come she always acted like a tongue-tied teenager whenever Matt came on the scene? It had happened when he’d called to sort out her car again after the vandalism. She’d gone bright red every time he’d spoken to her. In the end, after handing him a cuppa, she’d headed back indoors for fear of making a total idiot of herself. She glanced at Josie.
‘Shall we show him the elbow jab?’ Cathy moved to Matt’s side, pulled her left elbow up high and across towards her right shoulder.
‘Move your hips too,’ said Josie.