But here I was, with my best friend’s cock pressed to my thigh, his lips on my skin, listening to him tell me he wanted to fuck me.
Either I had lost it, or I had won a lottery without even knowing I was playing.
“I do want it,” I responded, feeling as Owen’s hand crept to the waistband of my shorts, his fingers inching below it, sliding down my thigh and toward my aching cock. “I want it so badly, Owen, you have no ide—”
The sound of the back door creaking open split through the house. Owen jumped, rocketing away from me, a look in his eyes like he’d just seen a ghost. As we leapt apart, my back slammed into a ceramic mug on the counter. and it shattered to the ground below.
“Oh God, is everything alright?”
Ruth appeared at the doorway to the kitchen, a concerned look on her face.
Owen was the reddest I’d ever seen him, and my face felt like it was probably even hotter than his.
“Everything’s fine!” I called out, quickly turning the other way to ensure Ruth didn’t see my rapidly disappearing hard-on.
“What were you boys up to in here, breaking dishes like this?” Ruth was smiling, clearly just joking with us, as she opened the pantry and pulled out a broom and dustpan. She handed it to me, and I couldn’t bear to make eye contact with her as I started to sweep. Owen was over at the sink, washing dishes.
“Just cleaning up in here, Mom,” Owen said.
“Well, when you’re done, I want you to come back out,” Ruth said. “We only have two nights left here. Megan must feel so alone back there without you.”
“We’ll be right out,” I said, dumping the ceramic shards into the trash.
“Alright,” Ruth called, grabbing her sweatshirt and heading back out onto the beach.
We went back out to the campfire, talking for another few hours. Every minute felt excruciating and also disappointing. I kept getting more and more tired, unable to stop my eyelids from beginning to droop.
By the time everyone came in from outside, it was after midnight, and I’d nearly fallen asleep on my beach chair. And it was another thirty minutes before Owen and I were sure the coast was clear, and I tiptoed into his room, taking off my swim trunks and shirt and climbing into bed next to him.
He hummed as I came in, and I could tell he had drifted off, too. I pressed a slow kiss to his lips, and when I pulled back, he smiled at me.
“Stupid family,” he said. “Keeping us up too late and making us too tired to even have sex.”
I sighed, lying back on my pillow, nudged up against Owen’s body. “I know,” I said. “Another time, I suppose.”
Inside, I was deflating. I couldn’t believe Owen had offered to fuck me and now it wasn’t going to even happen. It felt unfair, somehow. If only we’d been on our own, if only we’d had the forethought or courage to go to sleep earlier.
“I hate having to… sneak around like this,” I said, wrapping my arm around Owen’s naked torso. “Too inconvenient.”
He puffed out a laugh. “Really?” he asked. “I have to admit; I kind of love it.”
I made a disgusted sound. “Why?”
“I don’t know; it’s… fun.”
“What, exactly, is fun about it? The fact that we’re too tired to have sex?”
He snorted. “Of course not. I just… it feels exciting, sneaking around. It’s like I’m a rebellious teenager again, except I’m not hurting myself this time around.”
I groaned. “I’m done with being a rebellious teenager.”
“Oh, come on. You’ve never been rebellious a day in your life,” Owen said, nudging me.
“What do you call running around town in lacy clothes?” I asked.
“Yeah, but I was the one who made you do that. You just did it because you like me.”
“Fair enough,” I said. “But still. We aren’t teenagers. We’re twenty-six. Full-blown adults. I don’t… need to sneak around anymore. I like being myself.”
“I just think it’s fun discovering things all over again,” Owen said, turning toward me. His hand found its way to my hair, and he began gently stroking his fingers through it. “Things I’ve never done before. And… having a fun secret. I love that you’re my secret.”
I felt my whole body stiffen in bed. I furrowed my brow, taking his arm off me and sitting up to look at his eyes in the low light.
“Is that… is that what I am? Just your secret?” I asked.
Owen’s face twisted, and he put a hand on my shoulder. “Max, you know I didn’t mean it like that,” he said. “You know you’re my best friend and the most important person to me. But… for now, at least, we do have a secret. I don’t want you to feel like it’s a bad thing. It’s exciting. It’s fucking beautiful, what we have. Don’t you think?”
I lay back down next to him, settling in and looking up at the moonlight casting across the ceiling. “Yeah, it is,” I said.
And I meant it. But I also felt like it was the kind of “fun” that had an expiration date, and I was increasingly worried that expiration date might be two days away—the day we were leaving the beach.
“Don’t worry so much, Max,” Owen said, his voice already growing sleepier again as he resumed stroking my hair. “Enjoy the beauty that life gives us every day. Secret or not, this has been one of the best experiences of my life.”
I gripped my arm around him tight. “Mine too,” I whispered. He hummed softly back at me, but I could tell by the rise and fall of his chest that he was falling quickly to sleep.
I really wanted to enjoy the beauty that life gave me every day, and not worry too much about the future. But I couldn’t help it. Owen was too important to me. I was a planner by nature, and God, I wanted to fucking plan—I wanted to know what was going to happen after this trip, wanted to know when I’d see Owen next, wanted to know what he was doing with his life, wanted to know so badly when my lips could be on him again.
But a nagging thought at the back of my mind reminded me, over and over, that this might be it. That Owen lived in Rose Falls, now, and maybe I had been a summer experiment, a summer fling, Owen playing with the boundaries of sexuality with someone who felt safe.
I wanted more. Of course I wanted more. I had probably wanted more for a long time but never let myself acknowledge it, knowing that Owen couldn’t reciprocate. And now I knew too much—knew how good he felt near me, how he could make me come like no one else could. How unbelievable it felt to be so comfortable with someone.
But if I never got to do any of this again with Owen, was it even worth it? Should I never have gone down the road at all?
I slept badly that night, waking up every couple hours, until finally, just before dawn, Owen woke up for a moment, too.
“Hey,” he whispered over at me, seeing that my eyes were open, and I was fiddling with a loose thread on the sheets. “Are you okay?”
“Oh,” I said. “Yeah. Just can’t sleep.”
“Come here,” he said, his voice still raspy and only half-awake. He pulled me close as ever, and his skin was like velvet against mine.
“I love that you’re mine,” he murmured against me, giving me another tight squeeze.
I somehow felt my heart soaring and breaking into pieces all at once. “I love it, too,” I said.
I slept like a baby after that, safe in the dark against the person most important to me.
I felt like I was waking up in a cloud. I woke slowly, in layers, first only aware of the pleasant warm breeze on my shoulder, and then aware of Owen’s body against mine. I heard him sigh, then press himself up against me, spooning me from behind.
And then I felt his hand begin to move along the side of my hip. He was slow, taking his time like there was nowhere else in the world he needed to be other than here.
“Morning, you,” he murmured softly in my ear before kissing the back of my neck, just near my shoulder.
I hummed in response as I felt his hand sliding downward further, reaching my thigh, then sliding rig
ht over my cock and squeezing. “Oh God, that feels good,” I said, feeling myself harden rapidly in his hand. “Owen—are you sure? People are probably making breakfast downstairs—”
“They’re all out for at least two hours,” he said. “I went out for a glass of water an hour ago, and everyone was headed out the door. I said I was too tired, and you probably wouldn’t want to go to an art fair.”
“You don’t know,” I joked. “I could enjoy an art fair. But… I’m certain I’m enjoying this even more.” The last few words came out more like a gasp. Owen had begun gently stroking my cock in his hand, both of us still under the covers.
And despite all my worries the previous night, I knew I needed this. Being with Owen felt different than being with anyone else ever had. Feeling Owen’s arm around me was better than anything in my life, and I loved every moment of it: the sound of his breath behind me, the gentle but insistent way he stroked me, the knowledge that he could be doing anything at that moment, but instead, he had chosen me.
I never had thought that Owen would choose me.
I moaned under his touch and slowly turned until I was lying on my back and I could look over at him. He kept his hand on my cock as he leaned down to kiss me, his tongue brushing against mine, his kiss hungry.
“Max,” Owen said as he pulled back, then kissed down on my collarbone. He repeated my name over and over again as he kissed along my chest, grazing my nipples, and I shuddered at his touch. Soon he had rolled over so that he was on top of me, still keeping a hand on my cock as he gripped the side of my body with his other.
This was a far cry from the first time Owen had blown me. He’d been amazing that night, but he’d still clearly been learning, a little hesitant. But now, Owen seemed to be fully comfortable being in control of the situation. As he moved lower, he pushed my legs apart firmly, positioning himself between my thighs. He wrapped his mouth around my cock and took me all at once, going deep, totally unafraid. His hands gripped around my thighs as he took me, and I groaned, letting myself be a little louder. I knew we were the only ones in the house, and Owen felt far too fucking good for me to keep quiet.
“Jesus, you are getting so damn good at—at that—” I uttered, moaning again as his tongue dragged along the underside of my cock.
“It’ll be even better when I’m inside you,” Owen said, lifting off my cock and staring intently into my eyes.
A shudder ran through me. “You—you still want to do that?”
Owen hummed. “Of course I want to fuck you,” he said, stroking his thumb up and down my slicked cock. “You still want me to?”
“God, yes,” I said, a little too loud. My cock jerked under Owen’s finger, leaking a little precum, and he smiled, swirling his thumb around the wetness at my tip. His skin was already flushed, and I was certain mine was, too. “I want you inside me, Owen.”
He let out a groan, like it was almost too much for him to take, and he sucked once more on my cock, long and hard. One of his hands trailed lower, to my balls and then down toward my ass, and I shivered under him.
“Owen—I don’t know if you—I know you’ve never done this before, like, this way, but—”
“I know I need lube, Max. I wasn’t born yesterday,” Owen said, pulling off my cock and smiling at me. “Got any?”
I nodded, blushing even hotter. I pointed to my bag at the side of the bed. “In the side pocket there are condoms and lube.”
Owen laughed as he reached over.
“What?” I said, smiling. “I know I haven’t gotten laid in a long time, but I thought if I was going on a beach vacation, I might get lucky.”
“Did you?”
“What?”
“Did you get lucky?” Owen said as he placed the condom and lube near us on the bed. He looked me in the eye as he trailed a hand down from my chest all the way to my thigh.
“The luckiest I’ve ever been,” I said, my voice almost a whisper.
And then Owen’s lips were on mine again, kissing me more urgently than ever. It was like something had been let loose in him, like he’d been given some sort of permission he’d always wanted. He was straddling me, and our cocks pressed up against one another. That friction alone was already maddening to me—as I felt the length of Owen’s cock I could only imagine what it would feel like inside of me.
“Mmh,” Owen said, reaching down again and spreading my legs underneath him. “So we’ve gotta… go slow, right? I need to use my fingers first?”
“Here,” I said, reaching over to the lube. “Give me your hand.”
Owen held out his hand for me, and I slicked it for him, guiding his hand downward. I lined up his first two fingers with my hole, breathing deep, keeping my eyes locked on him the whole time.
And then I slowly guided him inside me. His eyes were intently on mine, watching me.
“You’re not gonna hurt me,” I said, my voice low. I pulled in a deep breath as his fingers went deeper inside me. “It feels amazing, Owen.”
Slowly, he began to gain confidence. He slid his fingers slowly in and out of me, and the pressure gave way to being incredible. I rocked my hips against him, throwing my head back a little, focusing only on the sensation.
“You’re so tight, Max,” Owen said, his voice breathy. “You’re amazing.”
“Give me another,” I said, nodding down at his hand.
“Are you sure?” he asked.
“I need it, Owen,” I said. And he obliged. I knew I would need three fingers to prepare for Owen’s size—he had a beautiful, thick cock that I knew would fill me completely.
And Owen was so different from guys I had been with before. Every moment, his eyes were intently on mine. His free hand stroked gently up and down my inner thighs, skating up to my stomach, every once in a while palming over my hard cock. He seemed concerned with making everything perfect for me, when in reality he had no idea just how perfect he was.
As he pressed hard inside of me, he moaned. “God, I want you so bad.”
“You can have me,” I said.
His eyebrows shot up. “You’re ready?”
“I’ve been ready for so long, Owen.” I breathed. I didn’t want to go slow anymore. I wanted Owen with a sense of urgency I hadn’t really felt before for anyone else. “Please,” I said.
Owen slid out of me, and for a moment I missed the sensation. He slid the condom over his cock, slicking it thoroughly.
My eyes fluttered shut as I waited for the familiar push against my hole, but instead, I felt Owen’s face near mine, and I opened my eyes.
“You’re everything to me, Max,” he said softly. His eyes were so close to mine that I could see the little flecks of gold in them, small jewels scattered in a sparkling green. He dipped lower to kiss me, soft and slow and sweet, as the tip of his cock met my hole.
“I need you,” I uttered as his lips pulled off of mine, and he just looked to me and nodded.
And then he started to press inside me. I was worried, before, that he might be too thick. And at first, there was a bit of a stretch. But more than anything I could only focus on Owen, at how utterly blissful he looked as he pressed further and further inside of me. His brow furrowed as if he was trying to control himself, to go slow enough for me. Soon he had pushed all the way inside, and he let out a long breath. I squeezed around him, and he groaned, gripping tight against my thigh.
“Oh God, Max,” he said, his breath shaky. “God damn, you feel perfect.”
“Fuck me,” I said, holding Owen hard on his hips.
He moaned and began to slowly rock his hips, pushing in and out of me. I had never seen him look so completely wrecked before, like there wasn’t a single thing in the world he was thinking about other than this.
I wanted to see that look forever. I wanted to see it again and again, wanted to give that to him, to promise he could have it whenever he wanted.
And as he started to push into me a little faster, gaining confidence, I stopped being able to think ration
ally, too.
“Owen, it feels so fucking good,” I uttered, spreading open further for him.
He nodded down at me, looking at me with half-lidded eyes. He watched me as he fucked me, concentrating hard, breathing heavily.
My cock was bobbing, hitting against my taut stomach with every thrust that Owen pushed inside me. I was aching, and I reached my hand down to wrap around my cock.
“Can I?” Owen said without missing a beat. My skin flushed again as he reached to grip my cock, all the while still pushing inside of me.
“Owen…”
“I don’t have to if you don’t want it,” he said, breathy.
“Of course I want it,” I said. “I just… if you touch me, I know I’m going to come so fast, and—”
“Good,” he said, moaning as he pressed deep inside me. “Because I’m too close.”
Owen wrapped his hand around me and began to stroke. He matched his own rhythm with his hand, stroking me inside and out, and I knew I was coming undone. It was too much—too good—and I couldn’t hold on any longer.
“I want you to come for me, Max,” Owen said between breaths.
“I’m going to,” I said, surrendering completely. Owen had given this to me, had wanted to give me this, and he had done it better than I’d ever known was possible. With a few more hard strokes, Owen was making me come, and I was spilling into his hand, across my stomach, up to my chest. I let go completely underneath him, moaning, and above me, I could hear only one thing.
“I love you, Max, oh God, I love you—”
And then Owen was coming too, thrusting deep inside me and calling out just as I had a moment before. He bent down lower over me as he came, the look on his face pure bliss. My thighs squeezed around him, both of us in a sheen of sweat, the ocean breeze licking at us through the window.
And my entire world had dissolved, too, into nothing but him.
“I love you too, Owen,” I said. “I love you so much. I always have.”
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