by D. B. West
“Think about it!” the chubby tech gushed. “If he comes from a place where gravity is like, even half again what we have here, I bet he can bound around like Neil Armstrong if he gets excited!”
The Director reflected that if his head tech got any more enthusiastic, he was likely to launch himself like the famed astronaut. To head him off, he asked, “Would you be kind enough to return the screen to its normal view? We are going to have the video conferencing equipment brought in so that I can interview him personally.”
Rather than calm him, this seemed to send the technician into a spasm of rapture. He drew a microphone over to the director while hammering the escape key and clearing the displays. “Oh, I have been waiting for this. Please, may we stay for the interview?”
“You can,” said the Director. “I will need you to monitor the recording software. I want every word and every movement captured for posterity. For you,” he said, turning his gaze to the skinny young tech. “I have another assignment.” He turned to the woman who had followed him, and who had remained motionless by the door. “Please ask the team to check their equipment, and get it set up as soon as they are ready.”
Nodding, she stepped outside, the door hissing closed behind her. The technicians glanced nervously between the Director and the alien in the telemetry room, both of whom appeared perfectly at ease. The Director stood with his hands clasped behind his back, eyes fixed on the white-haired humanoid who sat cross-legged on the bed, where he had remained since arriving.
The telemetry chamber was used for containment and observation at the laboratory. After a few minutes the decontamination airlock cycled, and an agent in a full Hazmat suit wheeled in a cart full of equipment. The alien turned his masked face to follow the agent who set up the screen and camera with quick, nervous movements. Another agent, also fully suited, stood by the door with a rifle trained on the alien. The Director noted that the creature’s pointed ears seemed to twitch backwards, and the corners of its eyes creased. If its mouth had been visible, he was sure that the alien would be smiling.
The woman who had accompanied the Director stepped back into the observation room while the agents were setting up the equipment. “Agent Soto,” the Director said, motioning to the woman. “Has asked animal control to bring down some tranquilizer rounds.” He motioned to the skinny young technician and said, “You will accompany them, and get us a full panel on the animal who accompanied this alien. I want blood samples, hair, nails, saliva, even fleas if you can find them. Unfortunately, we only have one containment unit, so the animal was placed in a solitary holding cell. We’re currently making arrangements to have them transferred to a more suitable facility, but for now, suit up and then get the samples over to the lab for processing.”
The young tech gulped audibly, and nodded to the Director. “Yes, sir.” Hanging his head, he moved towards the door.
“The animal control officers are just outside,” Agent Soto advised. “They have a suit for you, as well.”
The tech nodded again, and went outside where two burly older animal control officers stood in Hazmat suits. The fabric was stretched tight across their ample bellies, and one was struggling with the helmet. He said, “What the hell is this all about? That Agent Soto lady wouldn’t tell us why we were being brought down here. And why did you need the bear rounds?”
The tech took the suit the other officer offered him, and stepped into it. “We have an unidentified animal on site, and need your help securing some biological samples. It appears to be a large breed of dog.” He grimaced at his own understatement, thinking back on the animal they had brought in earlier. He hoped the bear rounds would be enough to put something that large to sleep. He hoped it did sleep, he thought briefly. Alarmed, he struggled into his suit while trying to calm himself. Zipping up and securing the helmet, he motioned for the two officers to follow him, and led the way down to the solitary holding cells.
Another officer in a Hazmat suit was stationed at the entrance to the solitary ward, which had been cleared entirely while the animal was present. He looked at the tranquilizer rifle and catchpole the two animal control officers were carrying as they approached. “What’re you gonna try to do with those?” he laughed nasally through his respirator.
“We’ve been ordered to secure some samples from the creature,” the technician replied.
“I hope you brought some elephant rounds then, or you’re just gonna piss this thing off.” He chuckled at his own joke, swiping his card to unlock the door. He waved them through, and then followed them into the ward, sealing the door behind them. “We put it in the back,” he said, leading the way.
The solitary ward was silent as a tomb, the sound of their footsteps echoing hollowly on the concrete. The last heavy steel door on the left was the only one that had its peephole closed. The ward officer pulled it back, peeked in briefly, and then moved away readying his rifle. “Well, it sure has made itself comfy in there. Check it out,” he said.
Putting down the catchpole, the first animal control officer peeked into the cell. With a muffled curse he leapt back, waving his hands in front of him in a warding gesture. “Uh-uh,” he said in a high, tinny voice through the respirator. “Ain’t no place on earth where that’s a dog.”
Placing one of the large tranquillizer rounds into the barrel of the rifle, the second animal control officer stepped to the peephole. He gasped slightly at the sight of the creature, and looking back at his partner said, “Get two more rounds out of the case for me.”
Placing the barrel of the rifle into the peephole, he sighted the animal. It did appear to be canine, with a long fox like snout and pointed ears. It was a forest green color, with yellowish highlights around its neck, ears, and haunches. Broad shouldered and heavily muscled, its thick paws ended in three inch claws. Its tail was curled tightly to its backside, and it was snuggled up on the cot where it appeared to have dug a burrow in the blankets. When the officer closed the breach on the rifle, the animal raised its massive head and glowered at him with its bright yellow eyes.
Scanning over its body through the scope, the officer paused and asked the ward guard, “Did anyone notice it’s got straps running through its fur, like it’s wearing something?”
“Yeah, we noticed,” the guard replied. “You want to go dig through its pockets while it’s awake?” he quipped.
“Good point,” the officer responded. “Okay, here we go.”
The animal was perfectly still, staring back at him through the peephole. He lined up his shot for the animal’s neck, partially exhaled, and gently squeezed the trigger. With a soft thwuump the dart slammed into the pillow by the dog’s head. The animal looked to the dart, then back at the officer, opening its mouth to reveal rows of teeth. Its tongue lolled out, and it took a series of huge breaths, looking for all the world like it was laughing.
“Well?” the second animal control officer asked.
“Give me another dart!” the shooter replied. “I missed,” he added quietly.
“You missed!?!” the ward guard roared, bursting into laughter. “You’re eight feet away from a barn sized dog, and you missed?”
Slamming the next dart into the chamber, the animal control officer sighted the dog. Aiming for the neck again, he calmed himself and squeezed the trigger. He heard the familiar whine as the dart left the barrel, but couldn’t see where this one impacted. “Did I get him?” he asked rhetorically, pressing his face to the peephole.
In reply, the dog glanced down at the mattress between its front paws, where a dart was clearly sticking. It looked back up at the officer in the peephole, tongue lolling, and rolled over onto its side as if presenting a larger target.
“Son. Of. A. Bitch!” the officer yelled. “Is the damned barrel warped? Give me another dart!”
Reloading the rifle, this time he snapped it to his shoulder. Jamming the gun as far it would go into the peephole, he fired at the animal’s exposed belly. Pulling the rifle back out, the officer pressed
his face to the opening. “What the…?” he began, recoiling from the door.
The three darts he had fired slowly floated back through the peephole. Bobbing into the hall, the darts spun aimlessly for a moment in the air, then lined up as though guided on each animal control officer and the ward guard. Not one of them had time to react before the darts surged forward, slamming into each of their chests.
The lab tech watched in horror as the trio staggered back, each of them quickly sagging to the floor. He wanted to run, but his legs felt disconnected and numb, leaving him rooted in place. The bolt on the door to the cell withdrew with a clank, and the heavy door creaked open.
The green dog trotted out into the hall, its teeth exposed in a huge canine grin. It looked around the hall seeming quite pleased, before walking slowly over to the technician.
Raising his hands in a feeble warding gesture, the tech made a low whimpering sound. The animal’s head came up to his chest, and it pressed right between his outstretched arms. Its muzzle crinkled as it began sniffing at his suit. After a moment, the dog sat down on its haunches, and looking straight into the technician’s eyes, opened its mouth and…spoke!
“Did you seriously pee?” the dog asked, tongue lolling in amusement, and his yellow eyes crinkled with glee.
“I…I…I can’t tell,” the tech stammered. Overwhelmed, his legs finally abandoned him entirely, and he sank to his knees in front of the animal.
“You smell like you peed,” the dog reiterated. “You’ve got a hole in your suit, too.” Raising a paw, he placed it onto the tech’s shoulder. “Calm down kid, I’m not going to blow your house down, eat your grandma, or commit any other acts of canine barbarism. Let’s start fresh without all the guns and needles. My name is Aki. What’s yours?”
“My name…? I’m…I’m Andrew Crouch…Andy,” he choked out.
“Andy, it’s nice to meet you” Aki said, taking his paw off of his shoulder and holding it out for a shake. The familiar gesture was oddly comforting, and Andy took the offered paw gently. It was at least twice as large as his hand, and he released it quickly.
“Why didn’t you say anything sooner?” Andy asked him.
“Orak was worried that it would be too much for your people to handle, and to be fair, you guys are known to be pretty loose with your guns,” Aki said.
“Orak? Is that your white-haired buddy?”
“The one and only,” Aki said cheerily.
Watching the dog’s mouth form words was so strange it was causing Andy to feel a sense of vertigo, as though his mind just couldn’t grasp what was happening. Averting his gaze so as not to stare straight into its toothy maw, he said, “You could have just said something before we tried to put you to sleep!”
“Well, you didn’t give me much of a chance, and frankly I’m not sure I could have relied on their benevolence. That one fellow with the keys was even talking earlier about taking it upon himself to come back here and put a bullet in me!” As Aki spoke, the cardkey on the ward guard’s belt came unclipped, and floated over to hang in the air between them.
“How…how are you doing that?” Andy stammered.
“With my mind,” Aki growled in a deep, mocking tone, before his tongue spilled out and he burst into a wheezing laugh. “Seriously human, my species doesn’t have thumbs. We were either going to have to hammer everything together with our mouths or figure out something a bit more refined. Hey, grab that catchpole and let’s get upstairs. Orak is calling for me. We can explain things all at once when we’re together.”
“The…the catchpole?”
“Yes. Put it on me, and hold onto it while you take me upstairs. Your kind are particularly susceptible to the illusion of control. If we get stopped, just tell the truth. You are taking me to Orak.”
Getting to his feet, Andy picked up the catchpole and slipped the noose over Aki’s muzzle. Struggling to open it wider, he finally managed to slip it over the dog’s massive head and neck. While trying to figure out how to hold the pole, he asked, “What do you mean by ‘the illusion of control’?”
“Your kind are easy to fool, as long as you think you’re in charge. Not just this,” Aki said, pointing his snout at the guards gently snoring on the ground. “But in all kinds of things. Hey, remember that election you Americans had, where those Clinton and Trump people were running? That’s a perfect example. Everyone in your government knew full well who was always going to be the candidates for your President. Your political system even has these insane ‘super delegate’ rules that guarantee the ‘will of the party’ can be carried out, overruling the ‘will of the people.’ Your entire process is rigged. Still, they had to drum up interest in the election to generate money, and get you lazy bastards motivated enough to go vote by propping up other candidates across from them to make it look like a ‘race’, or to help you believe you had some actual part in it by making your ‘choice.’ There was never a choice for you, it was just a…pardon the expression, dog and pony show. Now, grab that card,” Aki instructed. “Unless you want me to keep flapping it around in the air.”
Andy reached out slowly for the card, which was still dangling in midair. The card zipped forward into his hand, and he dropped it with a muffled yelp from under his helmet. Aki wheezed laughter at him again, and once Andy collected the key, they moved away from the three snoring figures stretched out across the ward.
“Are they going to be ok?” Andy asked, looking back at the officers.
“Sure, they were all big boys. Once you get me to Orak, you might want to have someone come help them. They are probably going to be a bit upset when they wake up.”
Gripping the catchpole loosely, Andy used the keycard to unlock the solitary ward, then led Aki back upstairs to the quarantine room. Even with the current crisis there were not many agents in this part of the building at night, and they encountered no one until they approached the two soldiers outside of the airlock. The pair stiffened when they saw Aki appear around the corner at the end of the catchpole, and both readied their weapons.
“Hold it!” the soldier nearest to them called. “No one informed us the animal was being brought up here.”
Andy shrugged through the suit. “I was told to bring it to the containment room for the interview, so here I am. If you don’t want to let me in, I’ll just leave it here with you.” With that, he offered the catchpole to the soldier, who backed away.
The light over the airlock door turned green just before it hissed open. The soldier and assistant who had set up the video conferencing equipment stepped through holding the helmets to their suits. They stopped abruptly at the sight of the guards with their weapons readied and trained on the massive dog blocking the hall. Seeing Aki standing there with only a catchpole around his neck, the two men attempted to push past the soldiers and get out of their line of fire.
Watching the four men get tangled in the hallway, Aki bolted into the open airlock, dragging the catchpole from Andy’s loose grip. The soldiers flanked the doorway just as the door hissed closed. They caught only a brief glimpse of the dog wagging its tail and shaking its head free of the pole.
The four men all turned to Andy, who had his hands already raised over his head. “We have to report to the Director right now,” he told them as he slowly backed towards the observation room.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Director Spencer studied the alien intently while the video conferencing equipment was being assembled. It was definitely humanoid, in fact, the only obvious physical differences were the monotone eyes and the pointed ears. Its short white hair appeared naturally disheveled, and swept back from a pronounced widow’s peak. The only variation in hair color was a small patch right at the point that was the same electric blue as his eyes. The rest of the figure was completely covered in the segmented blue tinted armor. Both forearms appeared to be equipped with some sort of high-tech devices, judging from the green tubing on the right, and the touch screen on the left. The screen remained dark, though a softly
pulsing red light by its wrist seemed to have some significance, as the figure glanced at it frequently.
“Director, I think I’ve figured something out!” The lead technician had been calibrating all of the telemetry again to make sure the strange readings the creature was emitting were correct. “I was getting some odd feedback on the pulse oximeter, but I’ve managed to smooth it out.”
“What sort of feedback? What do you think it is showing?” the Director asked, coming to look at the console.
“When we tried to amplify the heartbeat to listen to its pulse rate, we were getting a strange echo effect. I isolated each of the noises and got measurements on them individually. At first we thought its heart was just really fast, maybe one hundred twenty beats a minute. There was some odd overlap though in the rhythm! Sir, I think…I think he has two hearts! Once I isolated each one, they appear to be working in tandem, each beating approximately sixty times per minute.”
“Two hearts…tell me, have you had any luck adjusting the irradiator?”
“No sir, unfortunately that armor it’s wearing is completely blocking any attempts to get a look at his internal workings. It seems like it may have actually been designed just for that, judging from the way the films we tried to take came back. The figure is almost completely glared out, except for the exposed bits. That suit bounced everything back.”
Behind them, Agent Soto listened to her earpiece for a moment, before announcing, “The team has the equipment set up, and they are now dialing in all of the official observers before we begin. Director, you will be the primary contact and the only one able to communicate from this room, but the President requested that several other agencies act as witnesses.”
“Good,” Director Spencer said with a nod, resuming his observation. The alien still sat on the cot watching the two guards work impassively. It had made no attempt to communicate further after being separated from its animal companion, and simply sat there, occasionally closing its eyes as though resting.