by Jayce, Aven
Cove rubs his fingers in a circular motion around my shoulder. His hands are soft, like the snow falling down in front of us. His body is warm and his muscles are tensed. I don’t dare move or make a sound, hoping this moment between the two of us will last.
“I love the snow, especially the first snowfall each year,” he whispers. “Some people think it’s the end of life, that the cold weather kills and buries living things. I think it’s just the opposite. Winter is fresh and clean, bringing change into our lives. During the day it blinds us with its brightness and at night it’s hypnotic, sending us into a trance. Snow is pure and that purity is a welcome sight each year.”
He continues to look out onto the city. His warmth, generosity, and the proximity of his body completely captivate me. I want so much more from him. I’ve never really needed anything from anyone, except for sex. I do want him inside of me, but at this moment I’m happy just standing here, listening, waiting, and hoping that I might have a chance with this man.
“Is that your phone?” I turn and look over to the changing screen.
He walks behind the screen and answers it.
“Cove,” he says in a much louder voice than I’m used to hearing. Who could be calling him so late? Perhaps his mother needs something.
He walks out from behind the screen and looks at me, then paces the floor in a nervous strut.
“I see. Okay, I was planning on it,” he responds. “Tomorrow. Yes.”
He puts the phone down and walks back to the window.
“Is everything okay?” I ask.
“Yes, it’s just business.”
“Did something happen at the Scarlett?”
“No, it’s other business, but everything is fine,” he replies, hesitating between words, and exhaling big breaths of air. “I’m sorry to end this night short Sophia, but I need to get you home.” He turns, and I immediately latch onto his arm before he can get away. He looks inquisitively down at my hand, then at my face.
“I’m sorry. I just want to know if we can do this again. I mean, well I didn’t mean to invite myself over, but I…”
“Yes,” he says before I can finish my frantic sentence. “You’re welcome here anytime that I’m not in the middle of a job.”
We stare into one another’s eyes, and I finally see the craving that he has for me. It’s there; his desire, I can see it. He places his hand along the side of my cheek and brushes a few strands of wet hair off the side of my face. We’re both finally touching one another, my hand on his arm and his hand on my face. His dark eyes pierce my insides, making my legs tremble and my lips swell.
His phone sounds again, and he drops his arm quickly away from my face.
“Yes, it’s Cove,” he says in a forceful voice. “I will. I am. I won’t.” He hangs up and moves to the changing area, disappearing behind the screen.
“I need to take you home. I have some business to attend to.”
I change into my dress and we walk out of the poolroom, back to reality. The cold air immediately chills my body, and I wish I were back in the warm water, floating, looking up at the stars. He’s quiet as we walk down the steps and out his door. Something’s on his mind.
“You okay?” I ask, hoping it’s not me.
“Just fine. No worries,” he says, sending a smile my way as we leisurely stroll down the hallway of the building. “That was nice, I’m sorry I had to cut things short.”
“It’s fine, Cove,” I reply, as we stop in front of my door. “You know I have to ask you if you want to come in.”
“And you know I have to say no.”
“Because of business?”
“Yes, and only because of business.” He bites his top lip and looks behind him, almost as if he believes we’re being watched.
“Cove?”
He leans down and whispers in my ear. “Think of me tonight, especially when you’re in your warm bed watching the snow fall from the sky.”
My phone rings, startling us both. He steps back as I pull the phone out of my purse. It’s my dad. What’s he doing calling me so late?
“Hi Dad.”
Cove’s face turns white and he heads back to his place.
“Sophia,” my father sharply speaks my name, a tone I haven’t heard since the parking garage incident. “Stay away from Cove Everton.”
“What?”
“Walk into your place, and lock the door.”
“Dad, do you have a camera on me? How do you know where I am, and what I’m doing? And how do you know Cove?”
“Sophia, do what I say, and do it now.”
“No.”
“Sophia, I don’t want you to associate with him. Trust me.”
“Trust you? To hell I trust you. How the fuck do you know what I’m doing right now? Answer some of my questions and I might trust you.”
“God dammit, Sophia. Get in your fucking penthouse and close the door. We’ll talk about this in the morning.”
I huff loudly, opening my door to a lonely Lewis, and lock the two of us inside.
“Are you happy?”
“You’re inside?”
“You know I’m fucking inside, Dad, you’re watching me. You can see what I’m doing right now.” I throw my middle finger up in the air and I hear my father laugh. “Oh fuck you, this isn’t one bit funny, you asshole.”
“Sophia, calm down. It’s for your safety. I can only see your hallway and foyer. I can’t see what goes on anywhere else in your place.”
“What do you want, a medal? Am I supposed to be okay now, and not hate you because you’re only spying on me when I come and go each day? What the fuck, Dad?”
“I’m sorry, but I feel a need to take care of you. I want you to be safe and happy.”
“How the fuck do you know Cove?”
“Please stop swearing at me, kiddo.”
“No Dad, no kiddos this time! How do you know him?”
“Let’s discuss this in the morning, it’s late and I need to go to bed.”
“Well good for you, you fucker, you were the one who called me, remember? Just tell me how you know him, and I’ll try to let your camera in my foyer and the one in my hallway go for now.”
My father pauses, and then says four words I didn’t want to hear.
“He’s my business partner.”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
“No, Devery. The shit hit the fan.”
“Sophia, please, call me Dr. Rosen and not by my first name.”
“Okay, Dr. Rosen,” I say scathingly. “What the fuck? I’m so distraught right now and completely paranoid. It’s like 1984, and there’s a camera on me everywhere I go. I go out with Mera, and we’re being watched, and I try to start a relationship, and my father steps in because he’s spying on me. Then I find out that my father, Mera, and Cove have all lied to me. What the fuck?”
“Sophia, please,” she says in a hushed tone, trying to lower my voice down to hers. “Careful with the harsh language, I have other patients in the waiting area. Now, I understand that you’ve been hurt by everyone in your life this week, but what you need to do is talk it out with each of them. You need to speak to your father about privacy, and find out from him, as well as Cove, what type of business relationship the two of them have. And ask your father why he’s being so protective. There’s information that you don’t have, and these issues will be difficult to resolve unless you pick up your phone and talk it out with every person involved.”
I sigh, pissed off and ready for battle. I’ve spent the entire weekend hunkered down in my place, not speaking to anyone, and walking purposefully into my foyer just to give my father the finger. Devery’s right, giving them the silent treatment isn’t going to fix anything or make my problems disappear.
“You still with me, Sophia?”
“Yes. You’re right. I need to talk to my father.”
“Calling him would be a good place to start. As far as Cove is concerned, I don’t believe he lied to you, but he definitely could
have mentioned that he knows your father.”
“You think?” my sarcastic tone suddenly sounding childish. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound like a toddler in the middle of a tantrum.”
“It’s okay. What you’re dealing with, and the way you’re handling it is exactly why people come to me for help. Go ahead and show your emotions, but then we need to find the best way to fix the problem so you can move past it.”
“Again, you’re my voice of reason.”
Devery smiles and reaches for her tea. She has a knack for calming me down whenever I fly off the handle. I find comfort in knowing that I have her to turn to when I’m in need.
“Would you like to call your father right now, during your session today? It may help to have someone around for support as you discuss this with him.”
With wide eyes, I immediately shake my head no. I don’t think my father would appreciate it if I involved my shrink, his friend, in a conversation about Cove and his porn sites, then again, maybe Devery already knows about his business.
“Do you know what my father does for a living?” I ask.
“Yes, he owns a few companies. He’s a great businessman, full of charisma and highly intelligent. A genius, according to my parents and my brothers.”
“Yes, a businessman, but do you know what type of business he’s involved in?”
“Sophia, I don’t believe his product matters in this particular situation, but to answer your question, yes. He owns a handful of casinos in Las Vegas.”
She doesn’t know. Or she’s not going to say that she’s aware of the online sites.
“Yeah, I think I’ll speak to him in private.”
“Okay, but I suggest you do it soon. He’s worried about you.”
“And you know this because?” I ask inquisitively.
“He called to make sure you didn’t cancel your appointment.”
“Once again, I find that to be an issue with privacy.”
“I understand, but keep in mind that he’s paying for your sessions. He’ll find out if you were here one way or the other when the bill arrives.”
“Alright, maybe we should talk about something else. I’m done thinking about my father for now.”
“Why don’t you tell me about Cove.”
There’s no hiding the smile and delight on my face when I hear his name. Yes, let’s talk about Cove. Devery listens attentively as I recall the night that I woke up in his penthouse. The story of the milk and honey, and how I proceeded to take off the shirt he let me borrow, only to be rejected in the process. She nods and smiles as I continue on about the wine bar, meeting his mother, and the late night swim; all leading to the interruption by my father.
She takes an abundance of notes, her hand trying to keep up with my excitement of being able to speak about him to someone in such great detail.
“Wow, okay. Is that everything?” she asks.
“Yes. Well no. That’s everything about Cove. I had a few other experiences over the past week, but he was the most important.”
“Yes, I heard from Stephen that you walked out of the sex addicts meeting.”
“You didn’t mention it was a religious group.”
“You don’t have to be religious to attend, it’s more about finding support and showing support to others.”
“It wasn’t for me, Dr. Rosen.”
“Okay then, we’ll leave it at that. I can’t force you to attend, I only thought it would be beneficial,” she says, placing her notebook and pen onto her desk, as she pulls her glasses up to rest on top of her head. “Everything’s okay with you and Mera?”
“Yes, we talked. We’re fine. She lied to me about something, but we’re okay.”
“Well that’s exactly what you need to do with your father, and eventually Cove. Now, Cove,” she says, looking back through her notes. “You said you met his mother?”
“Yes.”
“Does he have any other family members? Did he mention his father?”
“Nope.”
“And obviously you didn’t talk about his job?”
“No, he wouldn’t divulge very much information about that at the time.”
“So, you were able to have a conversation with someone, like I asked, without actually having a conversation?”
“What do you mean?”
“Tell me what you know about him, besides what he looks like, how his penthouse is decorated, and how his mother dresses. Tell me what you know, not what you saw.”
“Is this a trick question?”
“No.”
I think for a moment, trying to remember what we talked about. What did we talk about?
“I know that he was away on business and that’s why all of his blinds were closed. He likes vanilla scented candles, oh, and he definitely works out. His body is tight.”
“Not what you saw, Sophia. Tell me what you know about him,” she requests in a calm voice.
I look past Devery, trying to think back to those two nights. What were those conversations about?
“He said he swims in the evening to relax. It’s a form of meditation. I can sense that he has a kind heart. He has a gentle way about him... I can hear it in his voice, and feel it in his body language. He’s also a lover of snow.”
“I have to say, after spending two hours with this man, you should have more information about him than you do.”
“I spent a lot of time just looking at him. I know we talked about some things too, I just can’t remember what right now. I might have been overwhelmed by his good looks. I don’t know, but yes, we definitely talked.”
“Have you thought about why he didn’t make any advances toward you?”
“Yeah, over and over again. I can’t figure it out. I mean, when a woman flashes her breast at a man, he’ll at least look at it. He never took his eyes off my face.”
“So do you think he’s more than just a challenge to you? Do you have feelings for this person?”
“I have a crush. I don’t know if it goes beyond that or not.”
Devery takes another sip of her tea, cradling the cup in two hands. She swivels in her chair for a few moments, mulling over my latest addiction to Cove Everton.
“Would you say you had feelings for Evan?”
“I loved Evan as a friend, and used him for sex, but it never went beyond that. I didn’t think much about him when we were apart, nor did I have any need to be with him. He was just convenient at the time. I have a desire to see and be around Cove. There’s a clear difference between the two, so yes, I guess I do have feelings for him.”
“Is that why you’ve been holding back as well?”
“What do you mean?” I ask.
“I’m starting to see a change in you. The other men we’ve talked about during your sessions were people you attacked. You were very forward with all of them, and if you were to act the same way with Cove, you’d be knocking on his penthouse door right now.”
“I don’t want to scare him away.”
“So it’s serious?”
“Yes, I don’t even want to share him with Mera.” Devery shoots me a confused look, and I remember that I haven’t discussed the agreement that Mera and I have about sharing men. “Sorry Dr. Rosen, that conversation’s for another time. Forget I said that.”
She writes a quick note in her book and waves me on to proceed.
“I’m confused. What am I supposed to do? I think about Cove all the time. I want to see him and spend time with him. He hasn’t made contact with me since he left me standing outside my apartment the other night.”
“Again, I believe you’ll have more answers after you speak to your father. You need to talk to him before you can talk to Cove. You also need to come to terms with the fact that you may be falling in love with someone.”
I laugh nervously at her words. “Do I need to do something to prepare for that?” I ask, innocently.
Devery laughs as well, “No, just let it happen, don’t be afraid, but be prepar
ed for disappointment if it doesn’t work out.”
That’s probably the worst advice she’s ever given me. I want to ask her if she’s married or in love with anyone, but I’ll save that for another day.
“We’re out of time.”
“I need to make longer appointments with you, I didn’t even get to talk about my most recent fling.”
“Was that before or after Cove?”
“Before.”
“Put it in your past and move forward. You have a chance right now, a window to change your attitude about intimacy and how it can be a healthy and meaningful part of a relationship.”
I stand and thank Devery for her time. She opens the door to her office, requesting that I come back this Friday, or next Monday for another discussion.
“Sophia,” she says, as I’m walking out. “Don’t forget to call your father before you speak to Cove.”
***
I decide to make the call early Tuesday morning. Cove and Mera have both been silent, and I wonder if my father has talked to them. It’s not like Mera to give up so easily, and since she hasn’t called since Sunday, I can only assume that he stepped in.
“Dad?”
“Sophia, I’m so glad you’re finally calling me. I’ve been trying to get a hold of you all weekend.”
“We need to talk about the other night, and Cove Everton.”
“Yes, yes we do.”
“First, I apologize for my language. I was shocked and upset, but I think I had a right to be.”
“No need to apologize, kiddo. I understand.”
“I want to know why you have cameras in the hallway and in my foyer. You said it was for my safety. What exactly does that mean?”
“It’s for your protection.”
“Protection from what?”
“My business, which would include my clients, my employees, and the competition, as well as one of my business partners, Cove.”