"Come over here and finger this blond cunt," the escort said to Jenny as soon as Janet started blowing him.
Jenny was infuriated to the point of tears by the escort's insult, but she obeyed. After she slipped her finger between Janet's lips and began messaging, she struggled between her affection for Janet and her unwillingness to help the escort use her lover. She now understood Janet's dilemma of the previous Saturday. Jenny promised to apologize to Janet later, then gently drove her girlfriend to an orgasm.
After the escort left, the two slaves sat, arms propped on knees and heads bowed.
"I'm sorry I made you have an orgasm, Janet," said Jenny.
"Don't have to apologize to me," said Janet. "At least it was you and not that damned escort." She paused. "Jenny, I've been doing some thinking the last few nights, and I have an idea. I want to know what you think."
"Sure, Janet, anything," said Jenny.
"Well, I know we both hate what we have to do, and..."
"Gawd, you can say that again," Jenny interrupted. "I wanted to slug that escort when he called you a cunt."
"Yeah," said Janet softly, "I'd be pretty mad if somebody called you a cunt. But that's kind of what I want to talk about. If we work together, we're going to have to put up with a lot of shit like that, probably a lot of shit that's much worse than that."
Jenny had already covered this subject herself and feared Janet had reached a conclusion similar to her own.
"Anyway," Janet continued, "we can talk about it but I don't see how it's going to help. I mean, I can tell you that I hate having to watch you suck off some guy and you can tell me you hate it when an escort calls me a cunt, but it won't really get us anywhere. We won't feel any better for talking about it. Besides, I don't want us to spend all our time together telling each other how unhappy we are. The only time I have a chance to be happy is when I'm with you. Talking about work won't improve my disposition."
Jenny sighed loud enough for Janet to hear it.
"What?" asked Janet.
"You really had me scared for a minute. I thought you were going to say that we shouldn't work together."
"I'd be completely miserable without you, Jenny," said Janet.
"And I'd be miserable without you. But," and Jenny sighed again, "there are probably some things we should talk about."
"Yeah, I guess," said Janet. "But for now, can we just agree to leave it alone unless it's something really serious? We'll probably both know when we absolutely have to talk about something."
"Well, sure, I can agree with that." She paused. "But what do we talk about?"
Janet looked straight at Jenny and smiled a little. "I'm sure we'll find something." She stood up. "I need to take a shower. We both do. And I need to shave. And I need to relax. With you."
While Janet showered, Jenny wondered what she and Janet would talk about. She had been so worried about losing Janet that she hadn't time to think about the nature of their relationship. She was very happy being Janet's friend and lover, but she wasn't sure she could go further. What would it mean, she wondered, if she and Janet were in love. Would they get married after they left DiMarcos? Just how would that work?
After Janet had showered, she busied herself with shaving. Jenny took her turn in the shower then, just like the previous weekend, Janet carefully shaved Jenny. As soon as Janet had finished, and re-hung the shower curtain, she sat down with her back against the wall and pulled Jenny onto her lap.
"I've been waiting all week to hold you on my lap," she whispered in Jenny's ear. Jenny leaned her head on Janet's shoulder.
"Janet?"
"Yes, beautiful," murmured Janet.
"Do you think we're more alike than we are different?"
"I'm not sure what you mean," said Janet as she held Jenny next to her.
"I mean, are we, like, the same type of person?"
"Well," said Janet in a normal tone of voice, "no, I guess we're not. I'm big and rough and tough and mean."
"No you're not," said Jenny giggling.
"That's what all my boyfriends told me," said Janet.
"That's stupid. You're not mean. I know a girl who's mean, really mean, and you're not like her at all."
Janet gave Jenny a squeeze. "You're sweet," she said. "But who do know that's so mean? Are you talking about Teri?"
"Well, Teri's a real asshole, but she isn't as mean as Alicia."
"Who's Alicia?"
Jenny explained.
"Yeah, that is definitely mean," said Janet. "I guess I'm not that bad."
"You're not bad at all," said Jenny. "You're like, well, I don't know, I guess you're like a, ah, like a big sister."
"Really? Well, that's OK. Sometimes you're like a little sister to me. But only sometimes."
"Oh, of course, I didn't mean you were like a big sister all the time," said Jenny hastily. "But, you know, sometimes."
"Is that what you want me to be?" asked Janet softly. "A big sister?"
Jenny put her arms around Janet's neck and buried her face in Janet's shoulder. "I don't know."
"That's OK, beautiful," said Janet, as she stroked Jenny's hair. "It's OK not to know."
CHAPTER XVII
Although Janet would have been very happy to hear that Jenny was ready for a committed relationship, she was not disappointed with her lover. She suspected Jenny's reluctance to commit stemmed from a lingering aversion to same-sex relationships. Since time would overcome that aversion, and since time was not at a premium, Janet was content with things as they stood. She could be happy, for now, with a big sister/little sister relationship.
Jenny and Janet's second weekend together was very like the first. An escort paid the slaves a visit after breakfast on Saturday. Whenever one slave was sucking him, he made sure the other wasn't idle. He spent two hours with them. Not long after he left, Jenny's master appeared. Rather than take off his clothes, he led Janet to her own room, which greatly disconcerted Jenny. Upon his return, he explained to Jenny that he would bring Janet back when he left. When Richard visited later in the day, he didn't insist on privacy. In the evenings, Jenny and Janet quietly enjoyed each other's company. Janet let Jenny dictate when and whether they made love, and Jenny used her freedom to discover the subtleties of their mutual affection. By Monday morning, Jenny knew her lover better than she had ever known anyone.
Monday for Jenny, as for many people, meant returning to work. Of all those who went to work that Monday, however, few had to put aside their real affection and have passionate sex with everyone they met. Jenny's second week at DiMarcos had been dominated by a parade of jocks, and her third week was a continuation of the second. She was astounded that there were so many boys in the world, and equally astounded that she could have sex with all of them. Occasionally, she could distinguish one boy from another, but that happened less and less frequently. During that third week, she could have sworn that she had only three different customers.
The one visitor who was distinguishable was her master. Maurice faithfully called on his slave every morning. Jenny got to know him so well, and his compliments were so sincere, that she knew she was fulfilling her promise to be good. She felt comfortable with him in the sense that she knew she could please him. Maurice's comfort level, though, was inversely related to Jenny's. The confidence he felt after he punished Jenny on Monday of her second week slowly melted away.
When he visited on Friday of her third week, Jenny knew she had to please her master but one more time for her to spend the coming weekend with Janet. This inspired her to give her master a blow job which, to Maurice, was more like worship than sex. Jenny's humming was sublimely feminine and erotic. For the most part, her humming was seductive, low and barely audible. Three times, she gradually increased the volume until her voice and her movements showed genuine arousal. Then she let her voice subside again and made her master wait in anticipation for the next wave.
"You're truly amazing," said Maurice when Jenny had finished. "I feel closer to
you than I've ever felt to any slave."
Jenny was happy for the compliment, though not for its content.
"Thank you, master," she said.
"I'll be sure to tell the escorts that Janet can stay with you all three nights this weekend," he said.
Jenny managed a smile. "That's very nice of you, master."
Each of Maurice's visits thereafter went similarly, and Maurice again found himself struggling between duty and desire. During Jenny's fourth week, desire won out. Jenny, Maurice decided, was the girl he wanted for himself, and himself alone. She was young, pretty, intelligent, and divinely sexy. However, those attributes, attractive as they were, were not sufficient to make Maurice fall in love, and what ultimately broke Maurice's heart he himself couldn't describe. It was as though Jenny radiated something, at once ineffable and evanescent, from her eyes, from somewhere inside her, something soft and beautiful. With each visit Maurice became ever more aware of it, and finally it destroyed his desire to dominate.
Once he recognized what had happened – or, rather, once Jenny had forced him to recognize it – he had to confront his situation. In the best of all possible worlds, he would sweep Jenny off her feet and they would live happily ever after. Since he was not living in such a world, the way before him was not immediately clear. If he accepted the premise that he no longer wanted to be Jenny's master then he would necessarily have to leave DiMarcos. Leaving meant quitting, and that meant saying goodbye to Jenny forever. Since that was worse than remaining her master, he discarded the option of quitting.
He did see a way to remain at DiMarcos without being Jenny's master. He could de facto give up his position. It would be a simple matter to stop making demands on Jenny and treat her as an equal. He couldn't tell Jenny directly that he was abdicating his authority, but he could signal as much by dispensing with formalities. When she became a soph, he could become her best customer without arousing any suspicion. Though she would have to entertain others, she would mostly belong to him.
Workable as it was, this solution to Maurice's problem wasn't completely satisfactory. If Jenny were to be his alone, she could have no other customers. More important, if Jenny were to be his their affection must be mutual. Maurice didn't think it necessary that Jenny fall in love – indeed, he thought it very unlikely – but he wanted more than a slave's acquiescence from Jenny. Being Jenny's best customer wasn't likely to inspire her devotion.
Maurice decided he would have to do something to give Jenny a reason to like him. He thought that freeing Jenny from her sexual responsibilities would be just the thing. It was certainly possible for Jenny to remain at DiMarcos without being a sex slave. Nearly every slave over the age of thirty served in a position that didn't involve sex. Slaves were cooks, janitors, clerks, maids, receptionists, even photographers. If Maurice could maneuver Jenny into a position that didn't require sex, she might be grateful enough to become his lover.
Unfortunately, all of the positions at DiMarcos that didn't involve sex were filled by slaves who couldn't attract customers. Jenny was not in that category, and to get her into that category Maurice, with Jenny's connivance, would have to manufacture a disability which would render her unsuitable for sexual service. That done, Jenny could serve out her time at DiMarcos under relatively pleasant circumstances. When she was released, Maurice could quit his job and set up housekeeping with Jenny.
Though this second plan was far superior to the first, Maurice recognized the difficulties. Finding a ruse clever enough to get Jenny out of the sex business was problematic at best. Also, once she was no longer a sex slave Maurice would have to find some justification to visit Jenny. Even if he was able to surmount these obstacles, he would be left out in the cold if Jenny did not want to be his lover.
Again, Maurice found himself facing the difficulty of winning some measure of affection from his slave. In the end, no matter how he contrived to make Jenny his, success depended on Jenny's attitude. He didn't want much from her. Just a word, a single word from Jenny would be enough.
In the quest for this one word he knew he had a rival: Janet. In a contest with Janet, though, he was confident he had all the advantages. He had the power of his position, and he was sure that power, gently applied, could tip things in his favor. He knew Jenny was straight and Janet obviously could not offer Jenny a heterosexual relationship. Lastly, he flattered himself by believing that he alone could offer Jenny a life.
It was on Thursday of Jenny's fourth week that he set himself the task of eliciting from Jenny the word that would make everything else possible. He was as gentle and loving as he knew how to be. Instead of sitting in the chair, he made love to Jenny on her blankets. When he was done, he lay on his back and held Jenny next to him. He poured out his heart, telling Jenny in so many words that he loved her. It was the sweetest time he had ever spent with anyone, and though Jenny was just as sweet, physically, she did not utter the word he needed to hear.
Undaunted, on Friday he performed oral sex on a slave for the first time in his life. For a man of his size, Jenny was quite dainty and stimulating her to an orgasm required a delicacy that he didn't think he possessed. He was sure that Jenny's moans meant he had finally succeeded, but again he was disappointed.
For Jenny, the oral sex had been very nice indeed. Unfortunately for Maurice, nice was not good enough. No matter how nice he was to Jenny, no matter how much he complimented her, no matter how much he liked her, he was fatally flawed. He was a man. By the end of her fourth week at Dimarcos, Jenny's view of men had narrowed to a single point. Treated as an object by every man she met, whenever she was with a man she thought of herself as only an object. Though she could tell from her master's behavior that he was in love with her, she always felt that what he really loved was sex. She wanted a relationship which was truly reciprocal, one in which she felt like an equal, one that wasn't based on sex. All of Maurice's efforts only convinced Jenny that she could never have a satisfactory relationship with a man.
That Friday evening, after the slaves went through their showering and shaving routine, Jenny nestled herself on Janet's lap. This was their fourth weekend together. During their third weekend, Janet had been had been so loving and affectionate that Jenny's resistance to a committed relationship had nearly evaporated then. Her master, unwittingly, had removed the last barrier.
"Janet?"
"Yes, beautiful."
"Do you think you'll ever fall in love with a man?"
"Well, I'm not planning to date any guys, if that's what you mean," answered Janet.
"No, that's not what I was thinking, silly. I mean, do you think you'll ever feel comfortable with a man, like you're with him for something besides sex? As long as we're slaves I know we're just for sex, but after we get out of here."
"Well, that's a ways off, but a committed relationship with a man is not in my plans."
"Mine neither," said Jenny. "I can't be comfortable with any guy, even my master."
"What do mean, even your master? Don't mean especially your master?"
"Well that's kinda strange. He's a nice guy. And he's in love with me. But I still don't want to be with him."
"Jenny, he is definitely not a nice guy. He caned you for something that wasn't your fault. And how do you know he's in love with you?" asked Janet.
"Just the way he treats me," said Jenny. "He doesn't sit in the chair anymore and make me blow him. He calls me by name. He had oral sex with me, for gawd's sake. He tells me I'm wonderful, the most wonderful girl he's ever known."
Janet was intensely jealous. "Oh," she said quietly.
"But you know what the best part of having him make love to me is?"
"No," said Janet, grinding her teeth. "What?"
"When it's over. That's when I want to run and be with you."
"I don't need to have sex with a guy to know I want you," said Janet in a low voice.
"Please, don't take it the wrong way Janet. I don't mean that I want you just because I don't want
a man. It's just that, well, it's kind of hard to explain."
"What's hard to explain?" asked Janet.
"Well, up until this week, I couldn't decide just what it would mean to be in love with you. I still don't know, I mean really know, but I at least have an idea."
"So what does it mean to be in love with me?" asked Janet.
"Well, like I said, I'm not really sure. But if I break it all the way down, I guess it's pretty simple. I love you. You're the one I want to spend my life with. As long as I'm with you, I'll be happy."
"I love you too, Jenny," said Janet as she held Jenny next to her. They kissed, long and lovingly, for several minutes. Janet, though, was perplexed by Jenny's difficulty with what love meant. She couldn't resist asking.
"Well," said Jenny, "if we're in love we would probably want to get married. I mean, girls get married, don't they?"
"Yeah," said Janet, "all the time."
"So who asks who? Should I wait for you to ask me to marry you? And when we get married, what do we wear? What if we want kids? Who gets pregnant? And how do we find a guy for that? And how do we get pregnant? Does one of us have to sleep with the guy?"
Janet's amusement had mounted with each of Jenny's questions. "Actually, Jenny," she said laughing, "when the time comes I don't think we'll have much trouble with any of those things, except maybe the part about sleeping with a guy. I don't care what you wear if we get married. You could be naked and it would be OK with me."
"Now that's an idea," said Jenny sitting up in Janet's lap. "We've never seen each other with clothes. Why should we wear anything when we get married?"
Janet laughed out loud. "I guess the witnesses to that wedding would really be witnesses. But," and here Janet's voice softened, "we don't have to think about it for a while. Tell me what you want from me more than anything else and that's what I'll do the whole weekend."
"That's easy," said Jenny, as she put her arms around Janet's neck. "I love being alone with you. Whether I'm on your lap, or lying next to you, or making love, or just sitting and holding hands, whatever, I don't need anything else to be happy. When I'm with you I'm warm and comfortable and relaxed and excited all at the same time." Jenny let her arms slide from Janet's neck. She gently placed her hand on Janet's breast. "I can be really close to you and touch you and it just means that I like being with you. And at the same time it's sexual, but then it's not, I mean not really. I guess I'm not explaining it very well, but touching you is never just sexual. It's a lot of different things, all at once."
JENNY: A Novel of Sexual Enslavement Page 24