by Jude Ouvrard
“Hey, Val. Come on, smile a little. We’re both worried about you.” Nix pouted.
“What would you do if one day you woke up to Levi or Tyler gone?”
“I would cry myself a river,” Bekka admitted.
“I would go crazy, I don’t even want to think about it,” Nix said without humor. Levi had been her lifeline since she’d met him. I admired the way they loved each other with total passion. Nothing could break them anymore; they faced everything thrown at them, together, which made them stronger than rock.
“So, you have to understand I feel like my world is falling apart without Miles. I know he’s trying to help me make sure I know exactly who, and what, I want, but it’s clear. It’s already perfectly clear. I want him.”
“You’re in love like you’ve never been before,” Nix said, giving me a quick hug.
“I feel something really strong, for sure, and I want him back. Now. Tonight.”
“Levi told me what happened, and he said Miles would be back sooner rather than later. Don’t worry. It was written all over Miles’s face that he loves you. I guess it’s his way of being a gentleman.”
“Yeah… I guess so.”
He loved me, he’d said so. Miles wouldn’t play with me. I had to trust in him and believe he would be back soon. I grabbed my phone from the back pocket of my jeans and checked to see if I had any messages from Miles. I didn’t, but there was one from John.
I’m sorry about last night. Meet me for breakfast tomorrow morning? Please.
Hell, no. No freaking way. Was he out of his mind? How could he contact me again after what he had done? I couldn’t believe the nerve of him.
You don’t get to talk to or see me anymore. What you did last night is unforgiveable, and I’m never going to let it go. Go back to Boston, John.
There were so many rude things I wanted to say, but I tried to stay civilized. Giving him too much importance would show I cared, and I didn’t. Not anymore. I had moved on one hundred percent and never wished to see him again. My phone vibrated in my hand. Miles.
If you’re working tonight. Please don’t walk home alone after your shift. It’s not safe.
I smiled because he had given me an opening.
If you want me safe and not walking, why don’t you drive me home?
What was he going to say now? I would have to wait to see because a client approached me, and I went back to work. “What can I get you tonight?”
“I’ll have a Bud, please.”
I got him a Bud from the refrigerator, uncapped it, and let it slide on the counter until it reached his hand.
“By the way, miss.” My eyes met with his. “You’re the most beautiful woman here tonight. I thought I should let you know.”
Damn, I would bet my whole paycheck my face had turned bright red. “Thank you. I really needed to hear that today.” I smiled with my heart for the first time today.
“If you were my girlfriend, I would tell you every single day.”
“Thanks. Your next beer is on me.”
He saluted me, dropped a ten on the counter, and then went back to his friends. Some customers were easier than others. It didn’t take more than that to make my night. If only it could have come from Miles.
“Hey, co-worker,” Levi said as he sidled up to the bar.
“Hey, you. What’s up?”
“Thought I’d give you a ride home.”
Damn. Miles was smarter than me. “He called you, didn’t he?”
“Maybe.” Levi winked.
My protection and safety were always a priority to Miles, so I’d better get used to it.
“Levi, can you please change the music? You’ve been listening to ‘House of the Rising Sun’ for at least an hour. I like the song, but that’s too much.”
We were hanging out and drawing until Levi’s appointment showed up.
Kyle started laughing. “That makes two of us.”
Levi ran his fingers through his hair, embarrassed. “This song makes it easier for me to draw something difficult.” He let his pen fell on his desk. “I’m sorry. Put on whatever music you want… except dubstep. None of that shit.”
“Not a problem,” I said and plugged my iPhone into the stereo then pressed PLAY. I had a mix of Chet Faker, Coldplay, and Ben Howard loaded in the queue. Neither of them commented on the music.
I drew a portrait of Miles, unable to get him out of my mind. Tracing his sketched lips, his bottom lip fuller than the top one, drove home how I missed the taste of them. For his pale grey eyes, I emphasized every detail of his irises to add the light I loved to see in them. Gosh, I missed him. My eyes grew wet again, but I managed to control myself and let the emotion settle. Once I was done with the details surrounding his portrait, I started working on the lettering to be placed in a banner at the bottom. Of course, it said cowboy. A smile traced my lips while I chewed my Starburst. So many emotions behind that smile. When would I see him again?
“Show me what you got, Val.”
Levi hovered over me and made me jump in my seat from surprise. I felt my face heat in a blush before I even showed him my project.
“Here.” I lifted the drawing up to his eye level.
“Did you have a picture to help you with that?” His eyes were scanning my station, searching for a photo.
“No, I didn’t.” I shrugged.
Levi went to Kyle’s station with my drawing. “She did this without a fucking picture. It looks exactly like Millard.” They both went over my drawing while I sat in my seat, shocked by their reaction.
“She’s a fucking prodigy!” Kyle shouted like he’d won the lottery. “You’re going to be ready to start tattooing sooner than I had thought.”
What? No! “I… I’m not ready.”
“You are, and you will learn.” Levi lifted me off my chair and claimed me with a bear hug. Then Kyle joined us. I couldn’t breathe while unstoppable laughter bubbled out of me.
The shop bell rang as we hugged and did some sort of two-step dance.
“Thank you, guys. Coming back here, I had no idea how things would turn out. After a full year away, so much changed with Bekka and Nix. You made it easy for me, and then, Miles…” I said holding back the tears.
“I never took you for an emotional girl,” Kyle teased but Levi didn’t think it was funny.
“Shut up, K.” Levi hit him on the shoulder before welcoming his client. “Hey, Victor. Long-time no see. How are you doing?”
“I’m good. Who’s the hot chick?” he asked in a low voice.
For an instant I froze, and then blushed. Hello, Captain Obvious.
“She’s taken, Victor. Forget about her.”
I relaxed again then went back to my station and grabbed my own project—the one I couldn’t wait to add down my ribs to my waist. Something big and painful, but damn, it would make me feel sexy.
After two minutes of drawing flowers and swirls, tears prickled my eyes and I realized no matter how much I tried to control myself, I missed Miles and the emotions were uncontrollable, impossible to stop. I made my way to the bathroom where I cried in silence. It had been over twenty-four hours and the pain was killing me; a slow death. I could feel my heart pulling away from my rib cage. It hurt so much. We could be spending the night together, he could be making love to me, but instead, we were apart.
A day since you left. I still want you. My decision is made, and has been made since our first date. Miles, come back to me. Please. I’m begging you.
Typing took double the amount of time it should have thanks to my watery, blurred vision and trembling fingers. The wooden floor creaked outside the bathroom.
“Val, are you okay in there?”
“Yeah,” I sobbed. “I’ll be out in a minute.”
“Open up,” Kyle ordered. “I’m sorry I was an ass to you.”
After unlocking the door, I grabbed some toilet paper to dry my cheeks. I didn’t want Kyle to see me cry… again. He’d seen me in this state enough alr
eady.
“Hey, it’s okay if you’re sad. Levi and me, we got your back. Do you want to have the day off? Should I hunt Millard down and kick his ass? I’ll do anything.”
“Don’t hurt him, please. It’s just that being away from him, when I thought we had everything under control, is hard. He’s trying to be a good man, but it sucks something awful.”
Kyle watched me for a couple of seconds; he seemed thoughtful. “Look, I have a client coming in tomorrow for a tattoo, and I haven’t gotten around to drawing what they asked for.” He exhaled. “A unicorn. Who the hell wants a fucking unicorn?”
He made me laugh. Well, a sound that was half laugh and half sob came out of me.
“Can you draw a fan-fucking-tastic unicorn for me? I’ll even pay you at this point, I’m so desperate.”
“Sure.” I forced a smile.
“You can do it from home. Levi will be alright by himself.”
Right, I was supposed to be assisting Levi with his client. Suppose it wouldn’t look too professional for me to be sitting next to him with puffy red eyes, though. “Thank you, K. That means a lot.”
“No problem.” He gave me a compassionate smile. “Oh, by the way, she also asked for some flowers. More cartoonish than realistic. I’ll give you the stencil I had for the measures.”
“Alright. I’ll do that.”
“Work on it, but then take a nap. I’m afraid you’re working too much.”
“No,” I answered before thinking. John never liked how much I worked back in Boston. Justifying my work schedule had become a repeated task for me. “Well, maybe a little, but I like it.” And need it, as well. I had bills to pay and an apartment to decorate.
“If it’s too much, let us know, okay?”
I nodded.
“Good. Now, get out of here and go work your magic.” Kyle ruffled my hair then let me go for the day.
I waved at Levi as I walked past him. His eyes were fixed on applying a stencil to the client’s forearm. It sucked that I was going to miss this appointment, but at least I could work from home and listen to my music.
Now about that unicorn? Who the hell wants a unicorn on their skin… permanently?
Bekka ended up staying home tonight; the pregnancy made her tired and nauseous. As a result, Tyler seemed nervous. I could tell he didn’t like being away from her, even though she was a door away.
Tiff stayed behind the bar with Nix and me. Tomorrow, I’d try to visit Bekka in the afternoon, if I could find some free time. Since returning home, I hadn’t spent a lot of time with my girls—apart from work—and my goal was to remedy the situation.
“Hey girls,” I yelled over the music. Tiff turned toward me, shaking a mixer in her hand. “Nix!” I yelled louder to get her attention. Once I got it, I explained my plan for the following day. “What do you think about giving Bekka a mani/pedi tomorrow? We could surprise her, spoil her to make her feel better.
“I’m down,” Tiff said.
“Me too. Good idea. We haven’t done that in a while. It’ll be fun,” chirped Nix.
I had at least ten different colors of nail polish. Should be enough for four girls, right? The last time I’d gotten my nails done had been for Nix and Levi’s wedding. Los Cabos had been the best weekend getaway of my life. I hoped to go again soon.
“I’ll have a Samuel Adams, please.”
The voice requesting the Boston brand was unmistakable. The echo of his words made my skin prickle as I lifted my eyes to meet his.
“John.” His name tasted like vomit in my mouth. He’s not worth getting all worked up over. I took a deep breath in hopes of controlling the anger and fright within me. Miles had left me because of John; I didn’t think I could hate a human being more than I hated the man standing in front of me right then.
“Sweet pea, you’re worth more than this. Being a bar wench who serves drinks, I mean.”
“You’re not welcome here, John.” My voice had taken on a cold, severe tone.
“I don’t think your boss will agree with you kicking out paying clients. Come on, Val, you’re smarter than that. Besides, I came here to make peace.”
“I’m not interested, John. You crossed every line with me. You aren’t going to be forgiven.” My legs had gone weak. I shook while I held my ground. I could no longer move for fear I’d lose my balance and fall.
I tried to spot Tyler in the crowd, or anyone who could help me out of this situation. I spotted Nix first, and she was watching John like a hawk. All I could do was beg her with my eyes to help me out of this nightmare.
“Val, we’re almost engaged. I’ll pretend I never saw you with that guy. I’m ready to do that for you.”
“We’re done, John. Almost doesn’t make us engaged. Now, it’s time for you to head back to Boston.” Anger radiated in my throat and my heart pounded with the panic attack on the verge of beginning. Breathe in and breathe out.
“I’m not leaving without you, sweet pea. We’re stronger than this.” He leaned toward me from the other side of the counter, and placed his hand on the side of my cheek. I flinched, which he didn’t like. It insulted him.
Tyler came to my rescue, followed by Nix. Two of the doorman, plus the security guys, showed John the door as I ran to the bathroom, leaving customers staring at me.
What have I done with my life? I came back to Seattle to be happy, but my past came rushing back, too, to stop my happiness.
“Are you okay, Val?” Nix asked as she watched me empty my stomach in the toilet. “I’m sorry, stupid question.”
“I hate him,” I said wiping my mouth with toilet paper. “I just want Miles back.”
“He’ll be back. I bet he’ll be back sooner than he’d planned when he finds out John showed up tonight. He’s not stupid.” She helped me up and gave me a warm hug. “Maybe you should go home for the night. Tiff and I can handle things. It isn’t that busy. I’m sure Tyler will agree.”
While tempting, I had to work. Kyle had already sent me home from one job today. I couldn’t afford to leave this shift, too. “I don’t know.”
“You do know, Val. Come on. Get out of here and go home.”
Strong knocks on the door startled both of us.
“Val, are you in there?” Tyler asked before pulling the door open. “Okay. Take the night off, Val. I’ll pay you for your whole night, so don’t worry about your paycheck.”
“But—”
“No, girl, you go home and relax. Try to sleep. Being here won’t help you get back on your feet any faster. Nix, come on, we have customers to keep happy.”
Leaving the tattoo shop early, and now the club, too, left me defeated. This wasn’t like me. I’d always been strong, but since Miles had decided to take this break, I didn’t feel strong anymore. That part of me had gone with him, and I couldn’t wait to have it back.
I saw John tonight. He paid a visit at the club.
I sent the message without expecting an answer since Miles hadn’t replied to my last message yet. What if he was the one who needed this break? Maybe we’d gotten too intense and serious too soon. I had no idea.
MILES
Fuck! I should’ve known John would try to get her back again. The guy was hopeless, and I was the idiot who’d left her alone. Grabbing my pick-up keys from the kitchen table, I ran outside to the truck and hopped inside. It had started to rain by the time I reached the club.
Ending my time of hiding, I walked inside her place of work and my eyes went straight to her usual spot behind the bar, but it was empty. She wasn’t there.
“Nix,” I called while rushing over to her station.
“Where the fuck have you been, you idiot?” Damn, she’s not as understanding as Levi.
“Where is she?” I growled, and Nix seemed to hear the urgency in my voice. I didn’t have time to mess around explaining where I’d been.
“She left. John showed up and she was pretty shaken. Tyler told her to go home.”
“Who’s giving her a ride?�
� My eyes drifted to Tiff and Tyler, noting they were still present. I hoped to God they hadn’t let Val leave alone.
Clueless, Nix looked at me as if I were losing my mind. “She normally walks home, Miles.”
My hands balled into fists. Perhaps I suffered from paranoia, but if they let her go so soon after John had been there, the chances were good that he’d followed her.
“I have to go. This doesn’t sound right. I’ll call Levi if anything is up.”
“Miles… wait,” Nix yelled my name over the music, but I didn’t stop.
I had to make sure nothing had happened to Val or I would never forgive myself.
Back in my truck, I drove slowly, looking every direction, trying to find her. There was no trace of Val until I parked my car by the tattoo shop, however. It appeared she’d made it home; her living room light was turned on.
After locking the doors of my truck, I climbed the stairs two at a time. When I reached her door, her pleading voice resonated between the walls.
“John, please, we’re not like that anymore… Don’t touch me, I don’t want you to.”
Every plea made me angrier. I knew I had to be careful, because I didn’t know what I would see once I got in the apartment.
Just John. I could only see him, on the floor, and I had to presume the body pressed under him was Val. Fuck! Dealing with John again, I had to try and keep calm.
“What happened to you, John? You were never like this before. What changed?” Her voice trembled, and I wondered if she was crying or scared.
“I lost you and I didn’t see it coming. You’re my life, sweet pea. I can’t live without you. I can’t.”
I could understand his pain, but I’d had enough. “Get off her, John. Let her go.” The tone of my voice echoed in the room, glacial and murderous.
“Miles? Miles…” Val started crying.
He never moved off her. His hands held her wrists prisoner while he turned his vile hatred on me. “What are you doing here? It’s your fault she changed. We were about to start living our adult lives. Be a family.” John shifted his focus. “He’s a fucking country singer, Valerie. Do you think he’ll be able to spoil you and get you everything you need like I do?”