Caitlin shot her a cynical grin. “You’re trying to get me some sort of father figure, right?”
“No,” Kit said, crossing her arms over her chest. “I’m trying to get you two. In fact, I already have, so there!”
Caitlin laughed while shaking her head.
Kit switched to her serious voice. “I think you need it. Your dad ignores you and your mum isn’t great at talking about things. Also, she has problems that she needs to focus on, right?”
“Yeah. She says she’s gonna stop hitting on everyone. She’s talking about checking herself into a clinic for her drinking problem again, too.”
“Probably best. Even if she doesn’t and stays around, both your parents are hard on you one second and spoil you the next. Josh and Matt are different. They’re a regular, healthy couple with lots of affection and sage advice to give. They love chatting about feelings and listening to people.”
“I guess that’s cool,” Caitlin said with faked nonchalance. She traced a pattern with a few drops of spilled Fanta on the table. “You know, Dad will hate me spending lots of time with other adults and taking their advice. He likes to blame all my shitty habits on spending too much time with Mum, or Gran, or with pretty much anyone else but him.”
Kit considered Wing Commander Caine’s behaviour and personality and decided that she could live with him being outraged.
“Well, it’s up to you if you don’t want to spend time with, or take advice from, Josh and Matt.” She put her hand over Caitlin’s. “I’ve got to say, though, since your dad doesn’t spend time with you, he can’t complain when you hang out with people who do want to be with you and who want to help you.”
“Suppose not. Besides, I think everyone on this island agrees that pissing my dad off is a sign that you’re doing something right.”
Kit tried to keep from grinning. “You’re not wrong.”
“Oh, by the way,” Caitlin suddenly said, “Gran wanted me to tell you that she’s not gonna call the police. She’s punishing Uncle Anthony by not talking to him and by changing her will so the necklace goes to me. I told her that it’d piss him off more if she gave it to my dad.”
“Probably true.”
“Yeah, but she didn’t want to reward Dad’s, like, crappy behaviour towards you by giving it to him. So, I get the necklace.”
“Good. You can show it to Charlie Baxter to get him back on your good side.”
Caitlin had the decency to look embarrassed. “Yeah, I need to apologise to him. I did just want to check the cufflinks out, though.”
“There’s no need to defend yourself to me.”
“No, I guess not. That’s pretty awesome, you know,” Caitlin said with a tiny smile. “I don’t want to get all emotional and shit but thanks. For taking me seriously and for helping set me up with the gays.”
“Josh and Matt,” Kit said firmly.
Caitlin rolled her eyes. “Yeah, duh, I know their names. I just find it funny that the gay squad is saving me from my messed-up straight family.”
“Hey, your grandmother is straight, and she’s brilliant.”
“True, but I think she’s a little freaked out by me.”
Kit thought about that. About how Alice had rushed to get Caitlin that drink when they all first met in her cottage. “Maybe, but who isn’t scared of teenagers?” She paused, realising that she might be projecting her own feelings on all of Greengage. “Actually, Josh and Matt aren’t. Yet another reason why they’ll be great company for you. That and the fact that they have a YouTube channel about being a rainbow family and will probably let you guest star in the next vlog.”1
If Caitlin had looked pleased before, her eyes now sparkled like a Disney princess who had just got the prince, the cute talking animals, and the happy ending. The fact that she’d recently dyed her hair candyfloss pink might be leading to that simile.
“Awesome! I mean, I guess that’s good. Whatever. Have you got any more Fanta?”
“Sure,” Kit said, already on her feet to go get it.
There really was nothing like the buzz of helping people.
Chapter Thirty-One
Badgers, Susan, and Other Treats
That Sunday, Kit sat on the lawn behind Howard Hall. A picnic blanket was under her and a basket crammed with snacks enough for an army in front of her. She’d just told Laura about setting Caitlin up with two good, caring role models.
Maximillian was there, too, but not listening, of course.
Laura handed Kit a paper cup filled with Gage Farm cherry cordial. “That’s great, dearest. Josh and Matt were a good choice.”
“I thought so. I hope the three of them will get along, and the guys will get a good babysitter while Caitlin has some decent adults in her life.”
“I’m sure they’ll be very happy. What’s more, it’ll irritate the controlling Wing Commander Caine incessantly.”
Kit grinned. “Yeah, Phillip getting his knickers in a twist is a brilliant bonus.”
“That reminds me,” Laura said. “I’ve cut Tom off from his allowance.”
Suddenly Maximillian started paying attention. “Tom? Thomas Howard?”
“Yes. My brother. Your nephew. Howard or not, he now has to pay his own way,” Laura declared.
There was a brief pause in which Kit and Laura held their collective breath to see how Maximillian would react.
“Jolly good, dear girl! Is he still in prison?”
“He was never imprisoned,” Laura corrected her uncle with relief. “Only detained over a misunderstanding. He’s free now, but still in Monaco, yes. As I won’t buy his return ticket, he’ll have to use his savings or, more likely, trade his charms for some help from his rich lady-friend.”
“So, Tom does have a sugar mama,” Kit said. “Huh. I wonder if that’s made him less of chauvinist pig? Either way, good for you, babe. He needs to take care of himself.”
Laura nodded with the air of someone convincing herself that she believed it. “He does. I’m tired of giving him half of my paycheck just because he’s my brother. Part of my new scheme to put myself first is making him earn his own money. No more allowance. No more top-up loans.”
“I’ll drink to that!” Kit said.
They toasted with the cordial, and about thirty years of stress thawed out of Laura’s posture.
A bird of prey squawked overhead, and Kit and Laura watched it sail on the wind with endless confidence and grace.
“Wait, it’s July,” Maximillian muttered out of the blue. “I say, dear girl, when is that nonsensical kitten race?”
Laura didn’t bat an eye. In fact, she kept watching the bird. “The kitten race is next week.”
“Blimey!” he said, spitting biscuit crumbs. “My silk tie, the one with cat silhouettes on, is still missing. I must buy a new one before the race. After all, it’s expected of a Howard to show up and dress up.”
“Mm, Greengage has always had a lot of expectations of us. Although, I wonder how many of them we have put on ourselves?” Laura said, throwing Kit a meaning look.
That glance meant it was time. They’d discussed how to tell Maximillian but decided that there was no easy way of doing it. They’d have to slip it into everyday conversation.
Maximillian peered up from his current occupation of throwing biscuit crumbs at an anthill over by the trees. “What’s that, dearie?”
Laura clasped her hands in her lap. “I was talking about the expectations on us. For example, I ran into quite a bit of that when I ended my engagement with Dylan and got into my current relationship.”
Maximillian dropped his remaining crumbs. “You’re in a relationship? I say! Is it serious?”
The final part of the question must have thrown Laura a bit because she blinked at him for a short moment, but she stayed the course. “Yes. I apologise for not mentioning it before. I didn’t want to tell you since you were so heartbroken and not in any mood to see happy lovers parading around you.”
Seconds ticked away whi
le confusion, annoyance, acceptance, and something which might have been cramps due to wind passed over Maximillian’s features.
Kit found herself holding her breath again. His reaction was so vital. Not only because no one wanted him hurt but also because Kit suspected that, in Laura’s mind, this would set the precedent for how people would react when she put her own needs ahead of theirs. The problem was that no one else was going to see it that way, much less understand the importance of Maximillian’s next words. Least of all Maximillian himself.
He drew himself up. “Laura, I shan’t lie, I appreciate that you did not rub your blissful relationship in my face. However, I’m quite recovered now and glad to see you in love with someone.”
“It’s… not just someone,” Laura said.
He lowered his eyebrows so they were a cottony shrubbery over his eyes. “I’m not a simpleton. Considering the indiscreet intimacies and love-struck gazes between you two—not to mention that weeks ago Charlie Baxter showed me a tux he’s considering for your future wedding—it’s obviously Susan here.”
Kit allowed herself a moment of shock at that he’d actually noticed something, then got back to the business of her name.
“My name is Kit, not Susan. We’ve told you many times before. My full name is Katherine Sorel, but everyone calls me Kit. As you’re the uncle of the woman I love, I’d like you to do the same.” She tried for a smile but felt the muscles in her cheeks straining. Hopefully that didn’t make it look disingenuous. There was still so much riding on this conversation.
He made a sound somewhere between a scoff and a grumble. “Certainly. Yes. Kit. Of course. Do you think I would set up my darling niece with a woman whose name I don’t know? Don’t be absurd.”
“Set us up?” Laura said, wide-eyed.
“Why, yes, of course,” he said, puffing out his rounded chest. “Why do you think I’ve been bringing the two of you together so often?”
“You what?” Kit spluttered.1
He waggled a finger at her. “Don’t interrupt, dear girl. I felt certain that you were perfect for one another the first time I saw you together. Since then, I have been trying to get you to realise that you have more than friendship between you. I’m glad you finally noticed and decided to make it official.”
Laura and Kit stared flabbergasted at each other. Was there a point in questioning the lack of logic in what he was saying? Was there a point in putting him right? Did it matter? No. Not when everything had gone their way.
Kit couldn’t help but notice that Laura looked not only incredulous but also quite emotional. She recognised that sensation. This week was turning into one hell of a roller coaster.
Maximillian didn’t appear to notice their shocked stares. “Oh, and also, I now feel quite convinced that the progeny of badgers is called kits. Feisty little creatures, they are. Although, I suppose your late mother would call them endearing, Laura. She adored badgers.”
Laura’s eyes glistened, and her voice was croaky when she said, “Yes, they were her favourite. Do you remember when she used to put food out for them on the grounds?”
“Oh, yes,” Maximillian said. “I thought it rather ridiculous at the time. Your father, however, lectured us all on the importance of the different animals and forced us to celebrate sharing Howard Hall with so many creatures. Largely because your mother loved them so, I think.” He scanned their surroundings. “In fact, she loved the whole estate, even more than those of us born here. I miss her.”
“So do I,” Laura said quietly. “Every day.”
Tears now trickled down her soft cheeks. Kit went to hold her but was beaten to it by Maximillian, who hauled his niece into a brusque hug, almost making them fall over on the blanket.
Kit noticed Laura trying to suppress her crying, probably more for Maximillian’s sake than anything else. If the awkward hug wasn’t a sign that he wasn’t great at displays of emotion, the way he kept gaping and staring around like a fish caught in a net proved without a doubt that he was out of his depth.
After a few seconds, he coughed and boomed out, “Your mother would be proud of you, you know.”
“You think so?” Laura said, her words muffled against his chest.
“Oh, yes. Proud of the good person you have become. Proud of the businesswoman you’ve become, too. And, I dare say, exceedingly proud of the Howard you have become. Both your parents would want you to be in love and happy with your ladylove here.” He paused as if something had struck him. “In fact, I bet the first thing your mother would have said to Sus… Kit, was that the progeny of her favourite animal, badgers, were called kits.”
Laura laughed in between small sobs. “Yes, I bet she would.” She sat up. “Oh dear, what am I like? Crying over nothing.”
Right as Kit wondered if she should leave them to have this family discussion alone, Laura reached out and took her hand. She brought it to her lips and kissed it. Kit’s heart gave a thrilled thump, much stronger than its usual ones.
“You’re not crying over nothing, sweetheart,” Kit said softly. “You’re crying because you miss your parents and because this has all been very emotional. For all of us, I think. Anyway, I’m glad everything is out in the open now.”
“Me too,” Maximillian said. “I’m even gladder that I just had an idea of where my tie with the cat silhouettes might have gotten to. I wager it is tucked into my socks with the swan print.” He stood up and brushed biscuit crumbs off his perfectly pressed trousers.
Kit started. “Wait. Why would you keep a tie with your socks? And what do swans have to do with—”
Laura put a hand on her arm. “Don’t. We’ve gotten this far by not questioning anything. Let’s not break the good luck only to figure out the mystery of the cat silhouette tie,” she whispered.
Kit peered over at Maximillian, who was meticulously smoothing down his comb-over which the wind had blown out of place.2 She exhaled, long and slow. Laura had a point. When it came to Maximillian, or possibly to all Greengagers, she needed to simply roll with it.
Laura scooted forward on the blanket. “Uncle, before you go, may I ask one thing?”
“Of course, dear girl,” he said, now preoccupied with an ant that was climbing up his shoe.
Laura hesitated but then asked, “Who is Susan?”
Maximillian finished chirping to the ant about the biscuit crumbs he was throwing it before turning to Laura with a blank expression. “Susan? Oh, Susan! That was the nanny in charge of me, Sybil, and your father, when we were old enough to not truly need a nanny but still required supervision.” He stared longingly up at the sky. “Susan, short for Susanna, loved books, physical exercise, and always wore a necklace with a unique pendant, a fox kit. As soon as I was a grown man, I would have proposed to that incredible woman, if she weren’t as homosexual as the day was long.”
With that, Maximillian Howard guided the ant off his shoe and walked away with the air of a man who had said nothing out of the ordinary.
There was a long moment of silence so full of unspoken confusion that it hummed.
Finally, Laura said, “Well, I did warn you that he was something else.”
Kit adjusted her glasses. “Uh, yeah. You did.”
“And I suppose that ends the need to shelve our relationship.”
“Yep.”
Laura moved closer. “Also, you sorted out the mystery around Alice’s bookshelves.”
“True.”
“You also managed to help Rachel and Shannon,” Laura murmured in a low, affectionate tone. She edged even nearer on the blanket.
“I suppose I did.”
Laura sat right in front of her now, invading Kit’s personal space to the point that Kit could smell the fruity cordial on her breath as she whispered, “Sounds to me like my beautiful hero has earned treats.”
Kit’s smile felt so wide it risked getting stuck to her ears. “Really? Treats for me?” She pulled Laura into her lap. “If I’m very good, will you tell me what they are?�
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“You’re always good,” Laura replied suggestively. “So yes, I will. I figured we’d take a two-day trip to London, where we’ll eat at your favourite Thai restaurant, visit where you grew up, and go see any West End musical you want, as long as it’s within my price range. As an added bonus, we’ll visit every bookshop and library we see.”
Kit blinked. “Wow. You really do love me, don’t you?”
Laura only smiled and kissed her.
“Babe,” Kit said cautiously. “You’ll be with me for all of it, right? You don’t have to stop off to do business or something?”
Laura shimmied forward in Kit’s lap so they were even closer. “After these past months apart, it’ll be a long time before you can tear me from your side.”
Relief hit her like champagne on an empty stomach. “Great! Those are amazing treats. Maybe I should contribute some money, so I don’t feel like I’m scrounging off you?” She saw Laura’s frown and quickly added, “We can discuss that later. Thank you! So, um, what about the… you know.”
One of those expressive auburn eyebrows quirked up. “What’s that, my love?”
“You know, um, the outfit.”
“Do you mean that skimpy black negligée with white lace trim I bought?”
Images danced through Kit’s mind, getting naughtier by the second. “Yes,” she croaked.
“I can wear it when I come over to your cottage tonight.”
As much as her pulse was working overtime, Kit couldn’t stop herself from the obvious gag. “Under something else, right? I know it’s a short walk, but you could still be arrested if someone happened to spot you.”
Laura tweaked her nose. “Yes, under my dress, you plum.”
“Score! Then you will have treated me to everything I could ever ask for. Well, except for one thing, which I think I’ll be investing in myself.”
Laura ran a warm hand through Kit’s hair. “What’s that, dearest?”
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