by Tahnee Fritz
I guess I haven’t had the chance to actually see what their bodies do after I bite them. The few I’ve cured fell out of my arms as I was biting them. This little boy is much younger than the others, he looks no older than ten or eleven. His little body might not be able to take this and could be shutting down completely. I really hope that’s not the case, but he is shaking quite a bit and his eyes are rolling back in his head.
“Bridget?” Katie whispers, “Are you sure this is going to work?”
I shrug as the boy’s eyes close completely, “No clue.”
He lets out a quiet groan and his hands stop shaking and his body stops moving. He goes limp and starts tilting to one side. I bend down and reach out to catch him before he hits the floor. His body is cold and he stinks of death. The only thing we can do, is wait for the cure to have effect on him and pray for the best.
* * *
The sky is dark and the stars are out now. We haven’t had encounters of any kind and it’s beginning to worry me. Adam should have been here by now. I know they were outnumbered and all, but someone could have made their way to the truck stop. I can’t help but think something bad happened to them. Trevor had a lot of people with him and they all seemed pretty knowledgeable about using their guns. They could have easily killed everyone back there. I know the others are thinking the same thing. They can’t hide the worry on their faces as they try keeping busy.
Katie is responsible for watching over the boy as he lies motionless in the room behind the coolers. She hasn’t given us an update if he’s alive or not and watching over him is the only thing to keep her mind off the whereabouts of her father. Annah and Rose are trying to catch some sleep on the floor behind the checkout counter. I left Jason and Hank in charge to keep watch over everyone inside. With the one gun they have, they can offer some sort of protection if something finds us.
The moon is high above us and the stars are shining bright. It’s beautiful out here as I keep watch on the roof of this old building. I can see for miles and will be the first one to know if someone or something is approaching. I’m not just up here to keep watch. I felt the need to be alone for a bit while Ryder is down there dealing with his emotions over Carter. They were good friends and always had each other’s back. His death hit Ryder pretty hard and I think it’s starting to sink in with me as well.
Carter was a great guy. He saved my life when I thought for sure I was going to die back in Hatfeld. When that gun was held to my head and I closed my eyes, waiting for things to be over, he was the one who stopped that man from pulling the trigger. He was the one who actually understood why I needed to feel important and go on with killing zombies outside the city walls. Most importantly, he was the one who held Ryder back in order to keep him alive right after I was bit. I hate myself for not being able to stop him from getting shot. I wasn’t fast enough to stop that bullet. I’ll miss Carter like he was a member of my own family. Like the giant, older brother I never had.
I force myself not to cry as I stare at the empty field below. My shades are hanging over the collar of my shirt and I feel like a human without them on. I don’t feel like I’m hiding anymore. My eyes are still different, anyone can see that, but I don’t need to be different by wearing the shades at night. No sense in that.
I stare at the night’s sky and the stars that go on forever. They twinkle and shine, I’ve counted two shooting stars since I jumped up here. Out in the open is the best place to spot those things and they are amazing. When I was younger, I’d make wishes on them. Asking for a more exciting life, for something that made my life worth it all. In a way, I got that wish. It might not be in the same sense that I wanted when I was a kid, but my life is definitely more exciting than it was. I don’t really have too many things I could wish for anymore. Save for one thing.
An answer to a question I know I’ll never get.
Those people in the building below me, they all have a life they can live without anyone questioning it. They could walk into a group of other humans and feel right at home. If some random person were to get a good look at me, they’d scream for help and run for a gun. I might be here to do something wonderful for this planet, but where do I stand when it’s all said and done? Where’s my cure?
It sounds selfish, I know it does. That’s just how people get when someone else gets something so amazing and they can’t figure out why they aren’t granted the same thing. A rich kid gets a fancy bike while the poor kid gets nothing and they constantly question why. That’s similar to my dilemma. A difference being, and it’s a pretty important one, I’m the one who’s giving the amazing thing to those who need it. I can give the cure to the world, but the world might not be able to give a cure to me.
I guess that’s why life is so unfair. This god character is toying with me all over again. I’ve asked him over and over to give me a break with all this nonsense. Sure, I might have gotten that when I was living in the city for the last year. That’s not the answer I was looking for and neither is this. I never wanted to wind up in this situation. I wanted to be happy, living with Ryder for the rest of my life. I still have him, but it will never be the same.
Another shooting star soars through space. No point in wishing on this one. I turn away from the sky and stare at the open field behind the truck stop. The only movement I’ve seen in the last hour, was a deer jolting through the tall grass. No vampires looking for a snack, which is kind of surprising. I figured we would have had that issue tonight. I also thought Adam would have come here, but I’m obviously wrong about that too.
The metal of the roof creaks behind me as I hear footsteps approaching. I take a deep breath, smelling the air. The human scent fills my nose and I turn my head just enough so I can see who’s coming. Ryder, with a bottle of water in his hand and a thin smile across his lips when our eyes meet. He carefully strolls across the roof until he’s able to sit next to me with his legs dangling over the edge.
“Thirsty?” he offers me the water.
I shake my head, “No.”
He sets the bottle on the roof beside him and says, “I haven’t seen you eat or drink anything since last night with the zombies and I don’t consider that food. Are you okay?”
I shrug, “Food doesn’t taste good to me anymore. The last time I ate anything other than zombie meat, I felt like I was going to throw it back up right in front of me.” I’m sure he can hear the sadness to my voice.
“I hate that you have to deal with this alone.” He says.
“I’m not alone,” I reply, “there are thousands of other undead humans out there who are going through similar things.”
He takes my hand and gives it a slight squeeze, “You’re not one of them. You’re still the smart ass, brave chick I fell in love with. You’re just a little more badass and crazy now.”
I try to smile. Hearing his words makes things better, but it doesn’t make me human again.
“You know, a monster wouldn’t have saved that little boy’s life earlier. Someone other than you would have killed him or left him there to die on his own. You did a good thing, Bridge.”
I try to smile as I nod my head. There’s still no saying if that boy is going to make it or not. He wasn’t fully changed when we found him and I don’t know if it works that way. Believe me, I’m hoping beyond hope that it worked. I don’t want to think what I did for that boy was a waste and this cure of mine won’t work on certain victims. But, that little boy isn’t the thing on my mind right now. I’ve got issues that go far beyond the hope that he’ll wake up human again.
“Why are you up here anyway?” Ryder asks, after a few silent moments.
“Thinking.” I say.
“You know that’s bad for you, right?” he states. “What are you thinking about?”
“Nothing in particular.”
He nudges me with his shoulder and says, “You’re upset about something, Bridge, I can hear it in your voice.”
“I’m not good at hiding it, am I?”
/>
He shakes his head, “Not really. Why don’t you tell me what’s wrong?”
There are so many things wrong with me right now, I have no idea where to begin. Good thing he already knows the obvious so I can leave that out. Not being able to kiss or touch him the way that I want to is another obvious and we don’t need to go there. I’m sure he’s just as upset about that as I am.
“Bridget,” he says, “please tell me what’s wrong?”
I nod my head and turn my eyes to his, “There is something I’ve been thinking a lot about lately. Something I probably shouldn’t be wondering, but you know how I am.”
“What is it?”
“I get that I’m the cure now and I’m supposed to help save the world. As Rose and the others like to put, I’m a miracle and the best thing to happen to the planet.”
“So, what’s the problem?”
“It’s just,” I pause for a moment before going on, “if I’m the cure for all of them, for all the real monsters that are out there,” another pause and I stare into his eyes, “what’s the cure for me?”
His sad eyes stare back at me without an answer. It would be impossible for anyone to have that answer which is why I can’t stop thinking about it. I’ll be stuck this way forever, not knowing if I’ll die with the rest of the humans or if I’ll be forced to outlive the few people I really care about. I don’t want to be like one of those vampires in the movies who watch the person they love grow old and die right before their eyes. I want to die right along with them.
Ryder squeezes my hand a little tighter and says, “I really wish I knew. I’d want that more than anything. But, you can’t dwell on this one little bump in the road. I’ve seen you wrap your mind around something for so long that it drives you crazy until you get it and you can’t do that right now. We need you to be strong in order to get through this.”
“But I’m not strong enough. That’s why I’m in this situation by myself.”
He shakes his head, “You’re not in this alone. There is never going to be a moment where you’re forced to face this new life of yours without me by your side. I’m always going to be here. I’m always going to love you. Till the world stops spinning, I’m not going anywhere.”
Ryder’s always the best person to make me feel better about things. He’s always there to make the sadness disappear and make me forget how horrible the world is around us. Kissing him would help a lot more right now, but I’ll be happy just knowing his hand is in mine. Feeling the warmth of his skin against my own, is enough to help with the bad thoughts roaming through my mind.
I scoot closer so I can rest my head on his shoulder. This is going to be a tough world to go through. Knowing there’s a group of people hunting me, makes it a lot worse. We’ll all be lucky if we make it to the city alive and in one piece. At least I’ll have Ryder here to go through it with me. That might not seem like the best thing in the world, but if things go wrong, at least I’ll die with him.
* * *
Ryder and I sat on the roof watching the stars and glancing to the empty field for another hour. We waited, hoping we’d see someone walking this way. There was still no sign of Adam or George or even any of the bad guys who attacked us. I expected to see someone heading here. Even if it was just Trevor and his men hunting me down so he can take over the world. Seeing anyone would be better than seeing the empty field all night.
We walk across the roof until we get to the ladder on the back part of the building. This was the way Ryder came up and the way he is going down right now. I found a different way when I came out here earlier. Of course, when it’s super easy to jump ten feet in the air without a problem, getting to the top of a small building is nothing. Jumping down is pretty easy as well and I get to the ground before Ryder is halfway down the ladder.
“Cheater.” He says once his feet hit the concrete.
I smile, brushing my hair out of my face and the two of us walk around to the door. Hank is standing close to the glass and unlocks it when he sees us approaching. Ryder goes inside first and I take another look around before heading in. I focus my eyes, forcing them to see far enough to catch a sign of any movement. The branches on a few trees sway in the wind and a plastic bag floats in the air. No humans or vampires.
We’re completely alone out here.
Hank locks the door when we’re safely inside. The others are wide awake and staring at us like we have a plan or something. Jason is sitting on top of the counter while the girls are huddled around the small table. These guys were supposed to get some sleep. There’s no saying what kind of day we’ll have tomorrow and it’s best if we’re all well rested. I can’t have a bunch of tired people wandering the world with me while we’re trying to stay safe.
“Did you see anything out there?” Katie asks as she comes out from the room behind the coolers.
I shake my head, “No. Anything different with the boy?.”
She shakes her head and says, “Nothing yet.”
“What do we do?” Rose asks. “I mean, we can’t really just sit here waiting forever.”
“Yeah, shouldn’t we come up with a plan of our own for figuring out where they are?” Annah chimes in. “Like, shouldn’t we go searching for them?”
Coming up with plans has never been my strong point. I’m the type of girl who rushes in to save the day without knowing what she’s doing at all. I don’t really have that option when all of these people are expecting something more from me. We could head back for the village and hope there’s not a trap waiting for us. Waiting for me actually. I’m the only one they’re after and it would only make sense if Trevor has something set up just for me.
“We’ll lie low for tonight. Wait till morning and pray they show up.” Thank god for Ryder stepping in a saying something for me.
“And if they don’t show up?” Annah asks.
“Then we’ll go back to the village and look for them. We could find out what happened if we go back there and it’s best to wait till morning.” He states.
Katie leans against the wall and says, “I know my dad is back there, but I agree. There’s no saying what we could run into out there and I don’t want to risk getting attacked by another vampire or come across a horde of zombies. I was dead once and I am not going back.”
“Same here.” Jason and Rose say at the same time.
I run my fingers through my hair and wish I had a better solution for all of this. The few people sitting in this small truck stop with me, risked the lives they just got back to get to this point. Everyone back at the village risked their lives for a cause they only just started believing in. I can’t keep having a bunch of humans die for me. I’ve lost so many people over the years, all of them close to me in some way, I don’t want to lose anyone else. The people here now, are all I’ve got in this world until we make it to Des Moines. Even then, I might not have anyone if no one wants to believe me. There’s a decent chance of getting shot down before they give us the chance to try to explain things.
I wish I could lie and say that I’m not happy about getting bit and discovering the cure for the world’s issues. In a strange way, I’m glad it happened. In a worse way, I’m glad it happened to me and no one else. I might not know how to handle things just yet, but I’m learning and it’s easy to manage when I get the hang of it. That and I know what the smart thing to do with the cure is. Someone else could use it to their advantage and not share it with the world like they should. I know the human race needs saving and I’ll be damned if I don’t let that happen.
There’s another part of me that wishes for this to never have happened. I mean what normal person wouldn’t want a time machine. I could go back and stop myself from leaving the city with Ryder and the guys that day. We could still be happy living in our old house for the rest of our lives with the minimal excitement I get from working in the tower outside the wall. Carter would still be alive and none of us would be in this situation. Of course, there are a few people in this room that
wouldn’t be alive if it weren’t for the cure I gave them.
“Bridge,” Ryder’s calm voice interrupts my thoughts, “what are you doing?”
I shrug, “Just thinking.”
He smiles, “I’ve told you a million times how dangerous that is for you. When are you going to learn?”
I smile back and say, “Probably never.”
I stare into his eyes. Those perfect hazel orbs staring back at me. Those soft lips begging to be kissed. I’ll never get to feel those lips against my own again. Never get to feel his gentle touch as we make love in the middle of the night. Out of every human part of me I once had, the intimacies I share with Ryder will always be what I miss the most.
“Guys.” Katie calls and I turn my attention to her, “He’s moving around back here.”
I brush the memories of times spent with Ryder out of my mind and walk through the station. I meet with Katie and the others at the rubber door leading back to where the boy is lying. They let me go in first. If something bad happens, I’ll be able to handle it easier then they will. I poke my head around the corner of the room, letting my eyes adjust easily to this darkness.
The boy is on his back next to the wall, right where we left him. I stare at his chest, it’s slowly moving up and down. He raises his arms off the floor and I smile as I see the color of his open eyes. They are brown, the same color mine used to be. Katie notices the smile on my face and walks past me. She kneels on the floor next to the little boy and puts her hand to his chest. A big smile crosses her face and I know she’s feeling a pulse. The boy pulls himself to a seated position and looks around the room. He stares up at Katie and opens his tiny mouth.