“Look, I get you’re all hopped up on some need to protect me. Back off. I can take care of myself.”
He turned himself away from her and stared out the open door. “Not against this, you can’t.”
She bristled at the words. “Excuse me?”
How many times had she been told those words? How many people thought less of her for being a woman, or just plain human? She’d dried her eyes over the ones that nicked her heart and glared at the ones unworthy of anything else. Both groups lit a fire under her ass to prove them wrong.
To hear the words from Lorne, though, felt like a kick in the chest.
“You don’t get to make some caveman claim over my safety,” she spat.
“You’re mine, Sloan. You have your way of doing things and I have mine.” He took a step forward.
His? She didn’t feel like it when he barely even looked at her. “Don’t walk out that door, Lorne.”
As pissed as she was at him doubting her, she recognized something in his voice that had been there when he told her his story. She’d heard the tone from others in his position of kill or be killed, save or let suffer. He’d torn himself apart for the decision he made so many years ago. He wouldn’t fare any better a second time.
Damn the man for twisting her around into caring even when she wanted to slap him senseless.
“Or what, Agent? You going to shoot me?” His mouth twisted up in a savage smirk. “He’s my problem, Sloan. He’s only interested in you because of me. I won’t let him hurt you.”
She crossed her arms and stared at him coolly. “And if he was right here with his hand around my throat, I wouldn’t fault you for getting involved. Going out there, tracking him down, that’s the difference between defense and premeditation. I won’t let you damn yourself.”
A pause. He heard her, somewhere, but the part of him in the driver’s seat didn’t give a shit for her pretty words.
“Stay inside, Sloan,” he said. The words were thicker than before. More inhuman. One shoulder jerked unnaturally. His other followed with a loud snap.
Lorne stepped through the door and swung his gaze back to her. Gold eyes brightened. “Stay inside,” he said again.
His shape broke apart as she watched. Snaps of bone and tearing of muscle and skin made her stomach turn. She wanted to reach out and touch him, but he growled when she took a step forward.
Sloan closed the ruined door and pressed her back against it with a shuddering breath. When the sound of claws scratching against wood left her porch, she dared to peek through a broken window.
The dark bear stood taller than she imagined. He snuffed around her Jeep and his truck and lifted his head toward the tree line. Ten steps to one side of the house, then back to the other, the creature paced like a sentry on duty.
At least he wasn’t off on some murder mission.
Sloan dialed the office and pressed her phone to her ear.
Chapter 16
Lorne fit a wrench against a bolt and tried to ignore the shove of his inner beast. Repair work kept his hands busy, but his mind—and his bear—didn’t take the hint and shut the fuck up.
The night still weighed down on him. It’d gone so well, then crashed into fiery ruin. Fucking Ian. Glass and ripped fabrics and broken wood were what he’d given Sloan on the night that should have been filled with slick skin and kisses.
His bear bristled and paced. The foul scent of his relative clogged his senses and erased all the good memories of Sloan.
Maybe he’d been saved from himself. The thought left a sour taste on his tongue. He’d come close to biting her. Claiming her. The mark from his kiss had faded by morning, but existed as a reminder of his lack of control.
That Sloan had been convinced to stay the night in his den was his only bit of solace. He hadn’t even stepped inside with her. His bear wouldn’t allow it. He’d shifted as soon as the door closed and kept a tight patrol around his home until dawn.
He’d brought Ian on Sloan. His fault. He should have kept away the moment he’d known Ian was in town. Any human he took a shine to was in danger from that very moment. But no. He just couldn’t hold her at arm’s length or forget she existed. She paid the price because of his weakness.
And what had he done? Shown his true colors. Let his anger get the better of him. His bear roared at him that they were protecting their mate, but Lorne knew better. He wanted to keep Sloan safe as much as he wanted Ian’s blood. The two desires knotted together so thoroughly he didn’t know where one began and the other ended.
He’d only held back tracking down the bastard because of her. Those big blue eyes pleaded with him not to chase after Ian. Her scent filled with concern for him. Selfless Sloan. She was too good to accept what needed to be done. Ian wouldn’t stop until one of them was on a pyre to be burned.
She didn’t want him to damn himself. Too fucking bad. He already lived in a hell of his own making. His conscience wasn’t even a concern. He only wanted to keep her safe. He couldn’t subject her to the harassment Lilah experienced.
He needed to stay away. He needed to keep her safe. He needed... fuck if he knew anymore.
His bear snapped at him. Lorne gritted his teeth against a fresh wave of sendings. Those happy moments his bear predicted weren’t in the cards while Ian demanded his pound of flesh.
Round and round his thoughts spun, never coming to any solid conclusion. Stay. Go. Danger. Safe. He had no clear path forward.
He knew what he needed to do. A black hole filled his stomach whenever he came close to the thoughts. His bear slashed at his insides and promised to make life miserable.
Sloan would be better off without him.
He bared his teeth at the loose saddle rack and twisted hard at the stubborn bolt. The piece sheared clean off, and he punched forward into the plank jutting out from the wall.
“Motherfucker!” The metal crumbled around his fist. Lorne shook the sting off his hand and glared at the ruined piece of metal that should have been attached to the wall. Who needed a safe trailer, anyway? They should all just hide away and never leave the ranch again. Or make the damn tourists haul their own gear.
“How’s it faring in here?” Ethan asked, poking his head through the doors.
Lorne turned his glower on his alpha. “Fine.”
Ethan’s eyebrows rose and his eyes lowered to the bent saddle rack dangling toward the floor. He didn’t say anything, though, which made Lorne scowl even harder.
“Come on. It’s about time to call it a day. You can fix that first thing tomorrow.”
With a shrug, he pushed the ruined rack to the side. He expected Ethan to leave, but the man stood right by the open door and stared into the distance. Supposedly calm and relaxed, unease swirled in his scent.
“Had some trouble last night, I heard.”
Lorne slid a glance to his alpha as he packed away his tools. He should have known. There was no avoiding the subject forever. He’d tried to keep it hidden, but word spread through Bearden fast when police and federal agents crawled over a scene. Silent questions had been shot his way all day. Ethan was the only one able to pin him down.
“You know we have your back in a fight if you need it.”
“It’s fine. I have it handled. No need to get involved.” His fault. His problem. He hadn’t wanted the clan to find out. They were likely to push in where they could get hurt. Ian was poison he wouldn’t let harm the mates. He wouldn’t let an ounce of his trouble rain down on the Black Claw clan.
“Lorne, I know what you do around here. You play aloof, but you’re smoothing shit over with the Crowley pride or pushing buttons to get a brawl going before anyone can get it on tape.”
Lorne grunted. Ethan would only smell the lie in his denial.
“That doesn’t go unnoticed or unappreciated. I know it’s not your way to ask for thanks or help. You have both.”
“Don’t need it,” he said gruffly.
“Bullshit.” Ethan cocked his head. “M
y unwelcome advice? Caring from the background isn’t going to work with your mate.”
Lorne snapped the toolbox closed and stepped out into the yard. “She’s not my mate.”
His bear ripped him to shreds.
Deny, deny, until we die.
Better this way. The brief moments of believing he could make a life with her were done and gone. He had to stiffen his spine and plant himself firmly against the trouble brewing in the distance. Sloan would be safer without him. He’d make sure of it.
He was bad for her. Damage had been done long ago. He wouldn’t stain her with the blood on his hands.
Ethan barked a laugh. “I said the same thing once, too. Now, look at me.”
“Tied down and browbeaten?”
“And steadier than I’ve ever felt.” Ethan rubbed at his chest right over his heart. “Tansey means the world to me, just like I think this woman is to you.”
Lorne stayed silent.
“Your people know who she is now. There’s only one way to keep a woman like that safe.”
“Pack up and put distance between us.”
“No. Idiot,” Ethan snorted. “She’s determined to stick her foot in your trouble. All you can do is stay by her side and fight the fights she refuses to let go. Otherwise, who’s going to be there when she pushes too far?”
That was… something he hadn’t thought of. She was a fighter. Had to be, from what she’d told him and what he’d guessed about the rest. Clearing out the threat of Ian would keep her safe on one front. She’d find ten more battles by the end of the day, probably.
His bear rumbled in his head, as close to a purr as the beast could manage. Sticking close to the tough woman meant keeping her safe. He’d been an idiot to think otherwise, according to the sendings from his bear.
Lorne cocked his head at a noise in the distance. An engine rumbled closer and his bear answered with a pleased sound of his own. He glanced over his shoulder and saw the green Jeep bouncing along the dirt road.
“You want this woman?” Ethan asked quietly.
Sloan’s pulled to a stop, and she dropped to the ground.
“Yes.” The word punched out of Lorne. His chest ached with its utterance.
It’d been given life. There was no taking it back.
His life shifted the moment he scented Sloan. There was no going back to a world without her.
“Then you need to be upfront with what you want. Caring from the background won’t work with mates. She’ll call you on your shit more than we do. Rightfully, too.” Ethan slapped him on the back. “Now’s the time to figure out where you belong.”
“I’m going to be terrible at this.” Lorne raised a hand in greeting to the woman behind the brand new windshield. She ducked her eyes for a brief second, then met his look with a wide smile.
“Nah,” Ethan countered. “You’ve had practice caring for the rest of us, and I’m sure you hated us sixty percent of the time. You’ll be great when it’s the person who makes you feel whole.”
His alpha slapped his back once more, then started toward the main house with a tip of his Stetson for Sloan.
Sloan rounded the front of her Jeep. Strawberries and cream filled his nose and the words he’d prepared sat on the tip of his tongue, stunned into silence.
Mate.
The roaring and clawing of his inner animal ceased the moment he’d caught sight of her.
And now? His bear was in utter awe of her. She hadn’t flinched when confronted by Ian’s damage. Nor had she backed down when he was ready to give in to all that pent up rage.
Lorne wanted her. For another night, a month, an eternity. She was steel wrapped in silk. Good packaged in toughness. He could almost believe in her idea of the future. Nothing would stand in her way of achieving the justice she wanted for everyone.
She brushed back the stray locks of hair that had escaped her bun during the day and flashed him a cautious smile. “You had my Jeep fixed up.”
“Least I could do.” He’d arranged for the window repair as soon as she left that morning. His family, his problem. She didn’t need to pay for the damage Ian inflicted.
“The rest of the mess should be cleaned up and fixed by tomorrow or the day after, according to my landlord.” She hesitated. “I can get a room at the inn. Or up at the house. August and his family have a couch they’ve offered me, too. I don’t want to put you out for another night.”
“Stay. Here.”
Sloan ducked her eyes for a brief second before bringing them right back to his face. “Do you mean that?”
She didn’t hide from the uncomfortable parts of life.
He leaned close enough for their breath to mingle. “Yes.”
Lorne cupped her cheeks and kissed her soft and slow. No rushing, simply letting her scent cascade over him was enough to send his bear spiraling into delirium. Him, too, if he was honest. And when she parted her lips and let him slip his tongue against hers, he was done.
He trailed his palms down her shoulders and arms, then squeezed her hips. He skimmed over the swell of her ass and hauled her into his arms.
* * *
“Lorne,” Sloan laughed against his lips. “Put me down.”
“Not happening.” He didn’t stop until he reached his door. “I missed you.”
The words were heavy with extra emotion. Sloan lowered her lids and watched him from under her eyelashes. Strong jaw, troubled eyes. She didn’t need to be a shifter to sense the conflict in him.
“Did you?” she asked softly “You didn’t even stay with me last night.”
“A mistake.” Lorne fumbled open his door and kicked it closed behind him before backing her against it. “One I aim to fix. If you’ll have me.” He shook his head. “I don’t know how to do this, Sloan.”
“You’re getting awfully good at apologizing.” Her lips twitched before she turned serious again. “Let me in, Lorne. That’s how this works. What happened last night?”
Big. Important. That feeling of the world shifting took hold all over again in the silence of his home.
Nothing had changed since she left that morning. The worn couch still sat against one wall. The drying rack had the same dishes in it. Even the curtain on the back door hung at the same angle where she’d twitched it aside to watch the prowling bear.
The feeling of change didn’t leave her, though. She held her breath and waited for Lorne to say something.
He pressed his forehead to hers, eyes closed. When he opened them, they were pure gold. “I was scared,” he choked out.
“You could say murderous, even,” she murmured.
“The idea of anyone trying to go after you—”
A growl rumbled in his chest and kept going until she pressed her fingers right over his heart.
“You make my bear wild.” He wrapped his fingers around hers and flattened her palm against his racing heart. “That’s all for you, sweetheart. Last night… I needed to protect you. That was all my bear wanted in that moment.”
“I needed you with me, not out chasing someone down and causing more trouble. You can’t protect me from everything. I know what I signed up for, Lorne. There’s always someone out there wanting to hurt others. Sometimes that might touch my life.”
She didn’t cater to fragile egos. They’d been the death of more than one relationship. She didn’t want to believe Lorne was cut from the same mold. At least he seemed stuck in wanting to protect her, instead of trying to play down her own ability.
“But when it’s my family doing the hurting, I can’t stand by. This isn’t a little dispute that will blow over. Ian could be summoning the whole damn clan on our heads right now.
Sloan shook her head. “I don’t think there’s anything left of them.”
Lorne quirked an eyebrow at her. “What do you mean?”
“I mean,” Sloan paused and chewed on her lower lip. It wasn’t really confidential information, or anything significant to an investigation. He could discover it for himself w
ith a few phone calls, probably. “I mean, the information we have says there are only a handful of Bennetts living where you grew up. Reasons unknown, but the theory is the clan split years ago. Ian seems to be on his own.”
Confusion lined his features, then a flicker of sadness. Grief faded into relief.
Every one of the emotions she saw play out on his face had a place in his life. They were still his family, no matter what they’d done to him. He could mourn the loss of who they should have been and still be happy they wouldn’t be a threat to him or anyone else.
“Good,” he said finally.
She heard the lie in his voice. He put on a brave act, but the darkness visited upon him wouldn’t go away so easily. Wounds like his took years to heal, if they ever did.
Sloan hoped he could let go enough of the past to live in the present.
He leaned into her palm when she pressed it to his cheek. A rumble vibrated through his chest, and through her, still wrapped up in his arms.
“I’ll stay,” she said, “but only if you’re here with me. I need you in this, not guarding against something from the outside.”
Gold eyes still sparkled at her, but the trouble in them transformed into a different kind of mischief. “I think you can make it worth my while.”
Heat flared in her core, but she wasn’t willing to give in so easily. “Shouldn’t you make it worth mine? I’m not the one that left the bed cold last night.”
“Let me make you dinner.” He rubbed at his chest. The growl in his throat deepened for a single note. “I can provide for you, even if I couldn’t protect you.”
“Down, bear. I can take care of myself.”
“Easy, human. Instincts you don’t understand are demanding I care for you.” He let her slip to the ground, but he didn’t back away.
“What are they like?” she asked without meeting his eyes.
The SEA had manuals on the different supernatural species. Vampires, fae, and shifters all had their own way of living, and subsets of those groups added complexity. With shifters, great attention was paid to instinctual responses. Providing, protecting, those were big between mates. She still had a hard time wrapping her head around the idea of it being more than a simple relationship, but she couldn’t deny the reverence with which the word was spoken.
Breaking Fate: Book Three: Black Claw Ranch Page 13