“Tell me what Rach?” he suddenly snapped up, faster than she though he could. He didn't move away from the side but he was up and looking at something no one else could see. “That my mother might not be human? That I might not be human?” he said as his knuckles turned white from gripping the sides so hard. The idea of it alone made him sick to his stomach.
“No! No, that's impossible!” Joe piped up. “I spoke to her! She was human!”
“Did you ever meet her?” Sophinia asked.
“No, I was doing my last tour when they met but I talked to her on the phone and she was...normal! She was happy. She was in love with my brother, it was obvious!”
“Look, we don't know anything for certain,” Rachel said. “There's still a good chance that we might be wrong about this.”
That was a lie.
Without another word Jerry grabbed the bottle of whiskey and stormed out of the kitchen.
CHAPTER 15 – HAVE FAITH
Sophinia's Mansion – Sioux Falls
Sitting against on the floor against one of the book shelves in the library, Jerry stared at his own hands, scrutinizing their features, looking for anything abnormal. There were plenty of burn marks where he'd handled live wires, a few cuts that had scared, and one or two of his fingers were off angle from being broken. His nails were all but gone because he often chewed on them and there was definitely blood running through his veins but that was it.
No claws, no scales or cold rotting flesh. He looked perfectly human but then so did a lot of monsters. Some had made it their mission to impersonate a human with such skill that even their closest friends wouldn't be able to tell the difference.
Was he like that?
Was his human exterior just there to hide some horrible monstrous thing that lay beneath?
Jerry tried to think about it logically, listing off a few things in his mind that he definitely couldn't be. He couldn't be a werewolf or a vampire or a shapeshifter because they show obvious signs. Heightened senses, increased strength and healing. His healing was accelerated but then so was his metabolism. He couldn't be a ghoul or changeling because he had no urges to feed on human flesh or live other people's lives.
Is was no wonder Soph and Rachel couldn't figure it out. And Aria said that he was something new. Something that hadn't existed before. The question was what?
Whatever he was, whatever his mother was or is, it was making him question everything he'd ever known about himself. Replaying the events in his head, he took a closer look at his behaviour over the years. Was this why his father had always been so distant? Did he know what his son was? Did it scare him so much that he could barely stand to be in the same room with him?
And what about after the vampire attack that introduced him to all of this. Sophinia had always said that he'd taken to this world far more easily than most. Was it because he belonged in it? Was he born a part of it?
The endless questions started to make him feel sick again. He tried to push it back by taking another swig of whiskey but even that wasn't helping much any more.
“Daniel.”
He looked up to see a saddened Sophinia standing in the doorway. She walked over to him and crouched down, her wings falling to the floor behind her.
“I'm sorry,” she said.
“I should have seen this coming...” Jerry said back. His voice was hallow. He wanted to blame her, to blame anyone but he couldn't. They didn't make him this way. “Thinking this was just some kind of genetic anomaly was just wishful thinking.”
“Rachel's right. There's still a chance that we're wrong about this,” she tried.
“Yeah, if I was just a normal person...but I'm not normal am I? My mother, the chick in the hospital, my blood...the shoe fits,” he said looking away at nothing.
“Whatever the cause of your blood, it doesn't make you any different from the person you are now,” she said lifting his chin gently so that she could look into his eyes.
“Doesn't it?” he took another swig of whiskey. “You know, when we went after those Strigoi...I told myself I didn't want to wait for backup because they could kill more people before you guys arrived but the truth is...I just wanted to kill them all. I wanted to hurt them for what they'd done and when I did...I enjoyed it. I hacked them to pieces and I didn't even blink an eye...so tell me Soph, is it normal for a teenage kid to get enjoyment from decapitation?”
He never would have admitted it at the time but Pope had been right. He really had gotten into this for revenge.
She sighed but didn't stop looking into his eyes. She fought against the hypnotic hold they seemed to take. “Revenge is a human impulse. So is hatred, love, compassion, mercy...do you really think I look at you and see a monster? No, I see a person who would readily give up his own life to save someone that he's never even met. I see a man that stands his ground against evil that would cause anyone else to run screaming for the hills. I see a man that loves his family so much that he would fight God himself if it meant protecting them. You're not just a human being Daniel, you're an incredible human being.”
He battled back the tears welling up in his eyes. Her words, the smoothness of her voice, the unlimited compassion that lived inside her made it impossible for him to think of her as a monster. If a pureblood could be like this, maybe he could hold onto the human side on himself.
“She's right kiddo,” Joe smiled from the doorway. “It ain't what you are, it's what you do and all you've ever done is good. Monsters kill people, you save them.”
He walked over to his nephew and pulled him up from the floor into a hug. Jerry couldn't help but hold onto his uncle as hard as he could.
“No matter what your mother was, no matter what you are, you're family. You're my nephew and nothing in this world is ever going to change that.”
It was then that Jerry couldn't hold back his pain any longer. He buried his head into Joe's shoulder and started to weep. He felt Sophinia's hand gently rub his back, reminding him that they were all there for him. This didn't change anything for them. To them, he was still just Jerry.
“No more secrets...no matter what it is, how bad it is, I need to know,” he said. “That goes for you too.”
“What?” Sophinia asked.
“I'm not psychic, but I'm not stupid. I don't say anything about you guys because I don't want to upset you but don't think I can't see it.”
“See what?”
“You,” he said almost desperately. “I know you wish you were human. I know how much guilt you feel for the things you did in the past. But you also entertain hopes of a family, something you could never really have with us and torture yourself even more. And what's worse is that you do it on purpose! You surround yourself with the things you want so badly but at the same time you know you can't have them and it hurts you so badly but you think you deserve it! You don't have to!”
Sophinia's usual air of calmness and dignity had been smashed apart by his words and she was left speechless. All she could do was stare at him. It was that stare that finally brought him back to reality and made him feel the fear of what he'd just said.
“Daniel...I...”
“Either I'm right, I'm crazy or...I'm changing. I'm becoming something else...killing those vamps, learning all this stuff, I'm sinking into this world like quicksand and it's coming naturally to me. I don't know how much longer I'm gonna be me...”
A cold wave fell down his spine as he imagined himself transforming. But it was there long.
“You. Are. My. Nephew. You're Daniel Jericho. You're family!” Joe snapped him out of it and was looking at him with such intensity that Jerry buckled and suddenly felt nine years old again. “Don't ever forget that!”
The day he'd first met Joe at his fathers funeral. He'd been terrified of him. He was colossal, a soldier through and through. Massive shoulders, fierce brown eyes, looking reading to kill anything that was a possible threat. His hair had been lighter then. Sun baked from months in the desert. The tips of his
fingers were raw and ugly from the amount of work he'd put in. He had literally come straight off the front lines to attend his brothers funeral, pick up his nephew (who he'd never met before) and quit the service he'd given almost seventeen years to. Signing up at nineteen, Joe had been a career soldier before and even through all the horror he'd faced, he'd love it. It was who he was, a fighter to the end. Jerry felt a great swell of guilt for being the one that had taken that away from him. But Joe had a new war to fight and his nephew was the reason for it. Now he realized that Joe had been just as afraid of him at the time he'd come to claim him and over the years, they'd grown to know and love each other as a real family. The only one he had left.
He collapsed against his uncle again, crying harder than ever before. He was so afraid but some tiny piece of comfort came from knowing that Joe was there to protect him. Sophinia stroked the back of his head softly. He was glad she was there too.
“Listen, I think it's best if everyone stays here for now. This place has much more protection that your home,” Sophinia said after a few moments. “I'll get Celeste and the Salem witches to -”
“What?” Jerry suddenly shot up, drying his eyes. “But...my car?!”
“Jerry, your car isn't important right now,” Sophinia sighed.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, leave no man behind! That's the saying, right Joe?” he growled starting to look like his old self again.
“It's just a car.”
“Just a car, what are you high?! It's a nineteen seventy Mustang!” How could she not understand the miracle that was the custom Boss 429?
“Jerry -”
“No, actually, he might be right. It's not just the car, there's other stuff at the house that we should grab if we're going to be camping out here for a while. Lore books, supplies, preferably weapons. If the mage can get us there in a flash, we can grab everything and be back in like ten minutes,” Joe said.
“And the car!”
“Yes, Jerry, and the car,” Joe rolled his eyes.
“Okay, lets go,” Jerry said walking past them.
It was kind of amazing to see. A few minutes of crying, some reassuring words from the people that love him and Jerry had bounced right back. They wished that could believe it was that simple but unfortunately they knew Jerry too well.
He hadn't gotten over what had just happened, he'd just jammed it down inside of him so that he wouldn't have to face it. It worked as a temporary fix but sooner or later Jerry was going to have to come to terms with the fact that he might not be all human.
That was far more frightening than having to fight any monster.
St. Cloud – Minnesota
A wild flash of blue light and thunderous crack announced the arrival of Jerry, Goose, Joe and Vic. They were just outside of Joe's house standing in the darkened driveway with guns at the ready.
They scanned the surroundings for any sign of Aria but the place was quiet.
“Alright, we want to do this real quick,” Joe said. “Just grab anything that might come in handy.”
“Vic, I'm gonna load up some tools and parts into the back of the car and then you zap it back to the mansion,” Jerry said shooting over to where he'd stacked his tools.
“Aye. Gotcha,” he nodded.
Joe and Goose rushed into the house, turning on the lights as they did. They grabbed any bags or sacks that could carry guns, ammo and books and began filling them as quickly as possible. At the same time Jerry started loading as many spare parts into the back of the Boss as he could. After that he started focusing on any kind of tools he might need. He knew Sophinia's mansion had a pretty damn big and well stocked garage but he wasn't taking any chances.
They might not be coming back to this house for quite a while.
About five minutes later, he'd packed the car with just about as much as it could hold.
“Alright, Vic, send the car back, we'll get the rest of the stuff ready,” Jerry said.
“No worries, I'll be back in a minute,” he nodded and walked over to the Boss. He was just about to start his transport when Jerry suddenly started looking very nervous.
“Just...just be gentle with her...” he pleaded.
“Relax, this almost never goes wrong,” he smiled as blue particles began to circle the car.
“Wait, what do you mean 'almost' never?” he gulped.
Vic just winked at him before he and the car disappeared into a flash of light.
Jerry felt a wave of concern wash over him for his beloved vehicle. He missed her already. He walked over to the house just as Goose came out of the front door with two large bags in his hands. He set them down on the ground and Jerry crouched down to see what they had packed into them.
Weapons, radios, cellphones, books and a few other odds and ends were stuffed in there along with a few talismans and other charmed objects. Not that they worked on Jerry of course but Goose and Joe could use them.
Goose shuffled uncomfortably behind Jerry looking like he wanted to say something but couldn't find the words. Like the others, he didn't care if Jerry was some kind of hybrid but he knew for a fact that his best friend did care even if he wasn't showing it.
“Hey, you okay?” Goose finally asked.
“Yeah, why wouldn't I be?”
“Well...it's just -”
“It's just that I'm being hunted by yet another evil bitch with wings and I just found out that my mother might be some supernatural freak of nature thereby making me part supernatural freak of nature. Yeah, that's a little disconcerting but otherwise everything's peachy. I'm dancing on moonbeams, thanks for asking,” he scorned sarcastically.
“Don't do that,” Goose sighed.
“Do what?”
“Act like this is the end of the world for you. I get that this freaks you out but seriously, I've known you for how many years now? I've never seen anything to suggest that you're not human,” he said.
“So what are you saying, monster skips a generation? I'm fine but my kids might have six arms, a tail and the urge to flay human flesh?” Jerry said still looking pissed.
“I don't know, nobody does, so quit acting like the bus has already gone over the cliff, you're still here. I mean, you never know, maybe your mom isn't some evil flesh eating monster, maybe she's not evil at all.”
“What? A friendly monster? There's no such thing Goose and you know it! There's only killers and former killers!”
“That's not true. I mean, there's supernatural crap out there that don't hunt humans...witches, phoenix were good...before they went extinct, fairies don't kill people...often.”
Jerry gritted his teeth together and turned to face Goose. “I. Am. Not. Part. Fairy!”
Goose coughed a little and felt his chest tighten. He really shouldn't have mentioned fairies. “I wasn't saying that you were, I just meant -”
“And if by some sick joke I am part fairy, I will personally burn myself alive!”
“My point is that not all supernatural creatures are automatically evil.”
“No, just ninety-nine percent of them are!”
“It doesn't mean that you are!”
“Yet...”
“What?”
“Not evil yet...I don't know, maybe it's like paranormal puberty or something. You reach a certain age and then a switch gets flipped and boom, your evil! Instead of a bacon double cheese, you start pining for a virgin's liver and a side order of new born baby blood!”
“That's not going to happen to you!” Goose yelled.
“We don't know that it won't!” Jerry snapped back. “Even you gotta admit Goose, I've taken to this world like a fish to water!”
“So have I, so has Joe. Maybe it's a family thing?”
“My supernatural family!”
“We know for a fact that Joe is human! So was you're dad!”
“I never knew him well enough to make sure of that and it's a bit strange ain't it?! Three months of this crap and I feel right at home! It's like it's been building inside me
Goose, just waiting for a chance to get out!”
He couldn't believe that Jerry was actually thinking this. He was truly frightened of becoming some kind of monster.
“An advance ability to adapt to supernatural craziness isn't exactly the worst thing in the world to have Jerry. It'll help you to survive and save people.”
“Or kill like them!”
“I'm telling you, that won't happen,” he said with as much conviction as he could muster. No matter how hard he tried though, that tight feeling in his chest was getting worse. “I won't let it!”
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