by Jessica Cruz
“Let’s get you on that plane.”
Logan International Airport was a sprawling and intimidating maze of a building. I had traveled a lot in my life, but no matter how many times I came to Boston I always seemed to get lost in this airport. It didn’t matter how many signs directed me to wherever I needed to be; I’d always end up in the exact opposite location of that.
By a stroke of luck, I managed to gather my luggage and make it out to the street within a reasonable time. I flagged down a cab and was suddenly off to my adventure into the city. It was different here, but I loved the atmosphere. When I used to visit Nick on a regular basis, I always felt like such a tourist roaming the streets. I did the most stereotypical tourist move; I always looked up instead of straight ahead. I couldn’t help it though. This city was amazing. I immediately understood why Nick loved living here.
The cab pulled up to a tall, sleek, glass building with a green canopy hanging over the doorway. I rolled my eyes. In this hub of brilliant, historic architecture, my brother chose to live in one of the newest buildings in the entire city. It made sense though. I thought back to my own apartment in Philadelphia and realized just how much we were alike.
We were raised in a gorgeous Victorian home with mature culture and design. As soon as we were on our own, we craved the complete opposite, taking amenities for granted now, like granite countertops and heated flooring. My father would never have given into those details for our Haddonfield home. He wanted to be true to the time period of the house, but even he retired to an elegant hotel with modern fixtures.
The cab driver climbed out of the vehicle and pulled my luggage out of the trunk and onto the street. When I exited, I handed him some cash, telling him to keep the change. Just as I stepped onto the sidewalk, the doorman met me and tipped his hat. He inquired, “Hello, may I help you with your luggage?”
“That would be nice,” I said, while he grabbed my things. I walked into the lobby of the extravagant building and looked from left to right. It was far more crowded than my apartment building. Nick lived in a hotel. New people were constantly in and out of his building on a daily basis, and he stayed in a lavish apartment-suite on the twelfth floor.
“Hello and welcome,” said a woman from behind the desk. The door man left my bag for me where I stood, denying a tip and waving his goodbye. The woman continued. “Do you have a reservation?”
“No,” I said. “My name is Adriana Ward. Actually, I’m trying to surprise my brother, Nicholas Ward, in suite 1210. He has no idea I flew in from Philadelphia. I have my identification if you need it, and I’m on his approved guest list. Would you be able to provide me with a key?”
I slid my ID across the counter, and the woman examined it while clicking through a couple things on the computer. She looked at me through a narrowed brow and slid the ID back across the counter.
She said, “I shouldn’t even be doing this, but I feel bad you traveled so far to surprise your brother. I’m willing to provide you with an access key to the floor, but Mr. Ward will have to be the one to allow you vacancy into his suite. Once he calls for approval, I can send a concierge to his room with a spare key for the length of your visit.” She typed a couple of things into the computer again and slid a card key across the counter. “The elevators are down the hall and to your left. Would you like me to call someone to take your bags up for you?”
“No, I’ll be fine. Thank you so much,” I said, picking up my bags in one hand and the key in the other. “I really appreciate this.”
“It’s my pleasure Ms. Ward,” she said, “but please be aware that if Mr. Ward doesn’t call us with an authorization within an hour’s time, I will have to send security to his suite to discuss what he would like us to do.”
I nodded with my lips pressed together, hoping that phone call wouldn’t have to be made. During my wait and flight over here, I couldn’t get Wes out of my head. Nick was acting like a completely different person lately. Now that I was here, I couldn’t help but wonder if Wes was going to be right. What if Nick actually refused to see me?
I shook my head, refusing to think that way. I walked over to the elevators and slid my key into the slot, climbing inside the car. The doors closed, and I was automatically lifted to the twelfth floor. Once the doors opened again, I hung a right and followed the hallway, decorated in deep blue carpeting, black lighting fixtures, and red doors with gold plated numbers marking the room. Finally, I was here, room 1210. Slowly, I exhaled and rang the doorbell.
“Who is it?” I heard the gruff return of my brother’s voice. A shiver ran up my spine. I hadn’t heard his voice in so long. I chose not to say a word and rang the doorbell again in response. “Ah, fuck, give me a minute!”
There was the sound of a chain lock being removed and then the door opened, revealing my shirtless brother with a mess of chestnut brown hair sprawled out in a million different directions. His blue eyes grew with astonishment. For a split second, I wasn’t sure whether or not he was happy to see me, but then he wrapped me into a hug and laughed into my ear. He pulled away, looking me over as if he couldn’t believe I was really standing in front of him, like a ghost appeared in his doorway, and then he hugged me again. Relief washed over me.
“What are you doing here?” He laughed, kissing my forehead. He ushered me into his suite and grabbed my bag to pull it inside. “Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?”
As I walked into his apartment, I took note at how surprisingly neat and clean it was with the exception of some clothes thrown to the corner. It was adorned with an ultramodern and artistic look. The space was simply but impeccably designed with white walls and bold, colorful furniture. There was an oddly shaped, red couch at one end with an orb chair hanging from a heavy chain on the ceiling across from it. In between them was a coffee table constructed from a fish tank with bright fish and greenery. The walls were occasionally decorated with funky artwork that I didn’t quite like. Yes, this was Nick’s place. It was just as surprising every time I walked in here. It was as if Nick’s brain had thrown up, and the hotel incorporated his mess of thoughts into the design.
I spun back around, taking in the sight of my handsome big brother with his dimpled cheeks and tanned skin. Tattoos wrapped themselves around his left arm in an elaborate sleeve up to his chest. Besides being good looking, Nick was also very fit. He was a workout king and a complete health nut, so you’d be hard pressed to find an ounce of fat on his lean body.
I shook my head in awe, recognizing an equal balance of both my mother and father in him. He was blessed with the absolute best traits of each of my parents, making girls swoon over him for as long as I could remember. It made me feel sentimental to see such characteristics from two people that I loved so much in one person.
“I missed you,” I said, feeling myself tear up a little bit. Nick meant the world to me, and it was as if these past ten months of abandonment didn’t even happen. From the moment he answered the door, he was forgiven. “Dad misses you, too.”
A look I couldn’t quite understand crossed his face. He nodded his head and exhaled. Just before he spoke, a door opened, and a woman exited his bedroom. She had dark skin with wide eyes and black wavy hair down to her shoulders. Choppy bangs hung down her forehead, and a “Nick” tattoo was scribed in cursive directly over her panty line. I couldn’t help but notice she was dressed in a tank top and basketball shorts that were too large for her petite frame. She reeked of sex. Suddenly, Nick’s shirtless greeting made sense.
She looked back and forth between Nick and me and frowned. I couldn’t help but laugh. I recognized that look on her face. I bore the same expression when Michelle answered Wes’s door before I knew her to be his pregnant sister-in-law. She placed a hand on her hip and narrowed her brow. Staring me down, she spat, “Who’s this?”
Before Nick could speak, I approached her, easing the tension with a smile, “Hi, I’m Adriana. I’m Nick’s sister.”
Immediately, she deflated with a
look of relief and embarrassment. She cleared her throat and stuck out her hand. I shook it. She said, “Hi, I’m Angela.” She crossed her arms, covering her sheer top, and shot a cruel look in Nick’s direction. “Nick never mentioned you were visiting him today. I would have planned appropriately for the occasion.”
“That’s my fault,” I said. “It was a surprise.” Nick remained silent, glancing back and forth between me and Angela. “If you guys had plans today, I can always grab a room for the night. I don’t want to intrude on anything.”
“No, you’re not leaving,” Nick argued. “Angela was getting ready to leave anyway. She has work. The only plans you messed up were the ones I had for sleeping all day.”
Angela gave Nick a look that made me question whether or not that was the truth, but she agreed. She walked back into the bedroom and returned wearing a purple coat, tights, and these gorgeous high heeled boots. She gave Nick a quick kiss on the lips and said goodbye to me before she left.
As soon as the door shut, I turned to Nick, “You didn’t have to make her go. I don’t want to intrude on your life here in Boston.”
“You’re not intruding. Besides, that girl needs to leave. She’s a bad habit,” he walked over to the couch and threw himself down on the cushions. “She’s a fucking psycho but hot as hell. Oh, and she doesn’t have a gag reflex.”
“Nick!” I groaned as I carefully sat myself in the hanging chair. My brother, although wonderful in many ways, was a slut. He used his disgustingly unfair good looks for evil and self-gain rather than for good. He’d broken many hearts in his lifetime. I’m sure Angela would be covering up that tattoo by the end of the month. “I don’t want to hear about your sexual escapades. It was bad enough when you lived across the hall from me.” I kicked off my Uggs and pulled my feet up onto the seat. “So how have things been going?”
He shrugged, still staring at me with so many questions on his face. Carefully, he said, “Alright, I’ve been alright. How are things going with you?”
For a long time, I just stared at him, wondering where to begin. Someone owned a naked photograph of me participating in a sexual act with another woman. That same woman happened to be in love with me, and after I led her on during a killer high, I ruined our friendship. I missed Dad more than I could describe and was dodging phone calls from him asking me to move to Virginia. I was in a relationship with the perfect guy who accepted me being an exotic dancer, yet I still put our relationship at risk with lies and drug usage that he still didn’t know about but would totally disapprove of. Mom had virtually disappeared from the face of the earth after I punched her millionaire husband in the face at an event they were hosting. I just quit my job and had no idea how I was going to be able to continue paying for my bills. To top it all off, I had traveled all the way to Boston, and I was completely ignoring the fact that my brother spent the better part of a year pretending I didn’t even exist. I wasn’t sure how to sum up all of these things in one, simple, understandable response.
“I’m good,” I said. “I’ve been good.”
“You’re a damn liar,” Nick shot back. We stared each other down for a while. For as long as I could remember, we had this way of knowing how the other person was feeling or getting a good idea of what the other person was thinking without have to say a word. It’s good to see that didn’t change at least. He continued harshly. “You wouldn’t come all the way out here if you didn’t have a reason. Did you come to yell at me? Did you come out here to tell me I’m a piece of shit? Well, this is your chance. Say it. You spent the money and the time coming up to Boston. Don’t make your fucking trip pointless.”
“Why won’t you talk to me or Dad? What did we do to you? What changed? We weren’t raised to be like that, Nick. You don’t do that to your family,” I felt like I was a little girl responding in a hushed, wavered voice. Nick always made me feel like a little kid again. Tears slid down my cheeks. There was no point in fighting them back. I’m sure these would be the first of many shed.
“Mom did, and you still talk to her,” he said without looking at me. “She went half our lives pretending we didn’t exist, and now look at you guys.”
I laughed a humorless laugh. My voice rose, “So you really did stop talking to us because I started talking to Mom again? That’s fucking pathetic. She almost died. You tend to forgive people for their past mistakes when their life is hanging in the balance. She’s really trying to be a better person.”
“This isn’t about that anyway,” Nick got up and trudged to the kitchen grabbing a water bottle out of the refrigerator. He chugged the entire thing down without stopping once for a breath of air. Finally, he said. “It’s complicated. Things aren’t as they always seem. Maybe, it’s just better we don’t know each other for right now. Did you ever consider that I’m protecting you and Dad? Did you ever consider that you should trust my judgment even when it’s hard to?”
“Protect us from what?” I screamed. My face was burning red from confusion, anger, all the emotions I had been tucking away to make this as civil as possible. “Talk to me! You’re my brother, and you haven’t said a God damn word to me in almost a year!”
He stared at me; so many secrets clouded his eyes. He said, “Trust me when I tell you it’s for the best.” He scratched his head and exhaled. “You shouldn’t even be here today. You should go back to Philly. Fuck, you should go to Virginia with Dad. That’s farther.”
“Farther from what?” I stomped across the room with tears streaming down my face, and my fists trembling with emotion. I was so tired of everyone thinking I couldn’t handle myself. Whatever he felt like I needed protection from was insignificant to the battles I’ve faced in the past and present. “I’m not the same little girl you used to know. I’m not playing with dolls all day like when we were little-fucking-kids. I grew up. I can handle myself. Don’t learn that the hard way like Dennis did.”
“Dennis?” Nick’s posture changed. His eyes looked darker and guarded. “What the fuck does Dennis have to do with anything?” He growled. “You need to stay away from him, Adriana. He’s not safe. I’m serious.”
“No, he needs to stay away from me,” I crossed both of my arms, smirking with the memory of Darth’s blood fresh on my hand. “I punched him right in the face. The asshole had Mom pinned against the wall, so I stepped up and did something. Ask Bethany Howell. She saw the whole thing. She saw me defend our mother in the way her son should have.”
“Bethany Howell?” Nick’s eyes grew with terror. He grabbed me by my shoulders with his large hands, so he could get right in my face. It took me off guard when Bethany was the significant subject from what I had just said. “When the hell did you start seeing Bethany Howell again? Jesus, Adriana, have you been talking to her, too?”
I ripped myself out of his grasp. I choked on my words as I cried, “Maybe if you called me once in a while, you’d have an idea of who is and who isn’t in my life!”
In what felt like the far distance, I heard Nick, curse under his breath. He punched the wall, but I didn’t flinch. I turned around and started walking back towards the living room where my purse sat on my luggage. I went through the bag in search of my phone, ready to text Wes, and tell him I’d be on my way home shortly. Wes was right about everything. This visit felt pointless. Nick wasn’t telling me a damn thing. I had no time to decode secrets. When he was ready to talk, he could fly out to Philly and come find me.
At the same time, my phone started buzzing. I found it in the side pocket of my purse and rolled my eyes at the sight of Charlie’s name. Great, this is exactly who I wanted to talk to right now. Ignoring, Nick in the background, I answered the phone in an annoyed growl, “What do you want?”
“That’s no way to talk to me,” Charlie laughed on the other end. “I wish I understood why you’re always acting like such a hostile, little bitch. What? That boyfriend isn’t fucking you right?” I didn’t say anything. My heart was pounding in my chest. I could barely concentrate on the w
ords he spoke. He said, “I just wanted to let you know the deal is off. I sold that picture of you and Gloria.”
“What?” I screeched. My vision blurred. It felt like someone sucked all of the air out of the room. This couldn’t be happening. I heard him wrong. Yes, that must be it. “What did you say?”
“Money can get you anything in this world, and I really tried holding out for you sweetheart, but this guy was extremely interested in owning a picture of your pretty little taint,” he huffed. “He was willing to pay a lot of money to have a piece of Jersey. I had to give it to him.”
I shrieked, “Who?”
There was an endless pause. Finally, Charlie breathed the name in his cigarette stained voice, “Darth, Dennis Darth.”
I clicked off the phone and dropped it to the floor. The room was spinning. Tears streamed uncontrollably down my cheeks. This couldn’t be happening. There was no way possible.
I turned around and eyed Nick. I fell to my knees. The look of anger left his face. He ran up to me, screaming words that my ears just weren’t hearing. My whole world was coming to an end. I felt the same kind of bodily failures when I was at the club collapsing from the poor and senseless abuse of drugs and alcohol.
I muttered, “God, this can’t be real.”
“Adriana!” Nick grabbed me by the shoulders and shook me until I returned eye contact. “Fuck, Adriana, talk to me! What happened?”
“It’s Dennis,” I whispered. “He knows.”
Second Lies
The Second Life Series
Jessica Cruz
Out Now!
Chapter 1
The blanketed December sky stared down at me. Thick, smoky clouds loomed overhead, threatening a snow fall. It was beautiful out here on the balcony of the Darth Mansion, staring into the spacious backyard. Trees and shrubs were lit up with twinkling lights and giant red bows. It was the perfect backdrop for a large, catered Christmas Charity Dinner. All the guests loved gazing out the window to the elaborately decorated scenery, all of them, except me…