Return to Cancún

by Lena Malick

  “I won’t,” Terra said softly, not sounding too sure.

  “I’ve got a few years on you, you know? I’ve been to the love rodeo a few times. I’m just sayin’ be careful. I don’t want you living on saltines and soda water again.”

  The water around Terra suddenly lit up, pulling her from her daydream. Another light went on, then another. She rolled over, looking into the brightly lit water. Swirls of fish in vivid, rainbow colors fanned along the bottom. Nik was down on the reef. He looked up at her and kicked for the surface. When he broke the surface, he took her hand and stroked a few yards closer to shore where they could stand in the shallower water. He held her diving mask. “This reminds me of the first time we met,” he said. “The girl with no spit.” He handed her the mask.

  “Um. When I first saw you, I honestly thought you were the most beautiful person I’d ever seen.” She spit in the mask, swirling water to clear it. He spit in his own mask, doing the same. “Do you remember?” she asked, tentative.

  He nodded as he slid his mask on. “Oh, I remember. I remember every second of every moment we spent together.” He rolled over and dove down. She took a deep breath and followed him.

  They dove off the reef. He showed her some free-diving techniques. He seemed capable of holding his breath for as long as he wanted, like he was half fish. He showed her how to walk the reef to go deeper, which reminded her of a kind of underwater rock climbing.

  Eventually they went back to the boat and sat on the bow, drying off. Nik made birdcalls, getting the island birds to answer him back. He went back and forth with them, like they were having a complex conversation of squawks and screeches. “They be used to it,” he said. “I tell them all my hopes and plans.”

  “Hopes and plans?” she asked, feeling the warm night air drying her skin.

  “Yes. You know, my dreams.”

  He turned and looked at her with that same expression. One of the birds squawked again, left hanging in the middle of their conversation. Say it, she thought as she looked at him, her stomach tightening into a fist. What is it? What do you want to tell me? After a moment, he called back to the bird. The bird made a chuckling sound, as if laughing at their exchange. Or teasing Nik for being a coward.

  Nik stood and reached down, taking her hand. He led her down the steps into the hull of the boat. There was a small, cozy sleeping room, about the size of a large closet, barely tall enough for him to stand in. A low, wide bed was built out of the sidewall. Nik led her to the bed and laid her on her back, then slid in next to her. There were small oval windows along the wall next to the bed, at about the same level as the water. The surface of the water bounced against the windows, giving her glimpses of the illuminated, underwater world, and brief peeks of the island beyond.

  Nik traced his fingertips along the length of her body, from her knees, over her groin, along her belly and breasts, and all the way to her neck. He danced his fingers over her face and over her lips. Though his touch was as light as the flutter of a butterfly, she felt like there was an electrical change coming from his fingertips. As his hand fluttered back down, her body arched up, eager for more contact.

  He leaned down, his mouth at her lips, and paused. His hand traced back down her torso, his fingertips doing the light dance over her skin. His lips brushed hers. She felt his breath on her face. He smelled like the earth after a rain—earthy, clean and purely masculine. He traced her lips with the tip of his tongue in the same way his fingertips were tracing over her breasts, circling her nipples. She opened her mouth and their tongues met. She reached up, grabbing the back of his head and pulling him into a deep kiss. His hand cupped her breast, kneading and massaging.

  “Oh, God, Nik. Oh, God,” she said, breaking their kiss. She was already breathing hard. He had a mysterious command over her body, knowing just what to do. She responded in ways she only half understood, as if constantly discovering new sides of herself. He seemed to possess some key that opened her up in a way that was exotic and dangerous. It made her bold, giving up any pretense of self-control or propriety. She felt she could do anything with him and it would be okay. They were in their own little cocoon of a world, where they placed no limits on each other.

  “Nik. Nik, I want you in my mouth. I want to feel you in my mouth. I want to suck you.”

  While still sliding his fingertips over her, Nik sat up so he was on his knees, next to her head. She turned her head to him. He held his erection at the base. She opened her mouth, looking up at him. He guided his cock into her mouth as his other hand palmed her crotch. She reached up and held his dick at the base and slowly stroked him as she sucked.

  She’d imagined doing this in many fevered dreams. It was so wonderfully personal, like she was sucking at the very essence of him, his life force. She loved the power and strength of him in her mouth, hard but vulnerable at the same time. Both powerful and delicate. She could feel his pulse though her hands and in her mouth. She pulled him in deeper, as far as she could. He let out a long, low groan as his fingers rubbed the outside of her vagina. He seemed to expand further, pushing out against the inside of her mouth, growing more solid in her hands. His finger slipped inside her. She let out a whimper as his palm rubbed against her clit.

  Nik turned and lifted himself over her, straddling her backwards. He pushed her legs wide apart with his elbows and gently pulled her open with his fingertips. When his mouth touched her she let out a long moan of pleasure. Feeling him hard and firm in her mouth while his tongue slipped inside her caused her to arch back, sliding her arms around his lower back, pulling him in tight.

  They formed a perfect union, as if synergized into a single organism. She lifted her legs and wrapped them tightly around the back of his neck. He thrust his hips gently, pushing and pulling himself in and out of her mouth as he rolled his tongue over her clit. Moving his hand under her, he slipped his finger back inside her, rolling it in circles against her inner walls. She pushed her groin up, increasing the pressure. He locked his arms around her hips and squeezed her tighter as he licked and sucked her. The boat rocked forward and back to their movements, adding to their momentum. She could hear water slapping the side of the boat.

  He stopped thrusting. She clasped the base of his dick, feeling it beginning to spasm. His body jerked, as if shocked. He groaned loudly, the sound vibrating between her legs. The first eruption filled her mouth in hot bursts. The feeling put her over the edge. Her hips spasmed, then her whole body jerked as a powerful orgasm rolled through her. He continued to release in her mouth in powerful bursts. Her orgasm rolled on and on, shimmering and vibrating throughout her body. Their energy combined into one, long release of pleasure.

  Before they could even catch their breath, he disengaged and turned around. He moved up her body, kissing her stomach and breasts. He kissed her neck, licking her behind the earlobe. He breathed in her ear in hot breaths, and then bit her earlobe as he pulled her legs up around his waist and entered her. Supporting himself on his arms, he stared down into her eyes as he pushed himself deep inside her. He held himself there, filling her. She was amazed at his capacity as a lover. He’d orgasmed only moments before. She ran her hands over his chest and abdomen, then behind him to the large, hard muscles in his back and shoulders. She loved the feel of his raw physical power, weighted on her.

  They made love for a long time, unhurried, luxuriating in it, kissing and looking into each other’s eyes. The boat tipped and rocked with their easy rhythm. Their momentum built slowly, almost imperceptibly, until their pleasure nearly peaked. He could sense exactly how close to orgasm she was. Just as she was about to go over the edge, he’d back off, denying her.

  He kept her at this precipice of pleasure for so long it became nearly painful. He backed off again, then once more brought her to the brink. As he pushed her to the edge again, she clawed at his back, whimpering, the pleasure saturating her so completely she felt utterly helpless. He seemed to have complete control of her, and all she could do was
give over. As he slowly pushed into her, his pelvis grazed against her clit with just the right amount of pressure. Just as she felt her orgasm catch hold, he pulled out, leaving her pushing her hips up, desperately wanting more.

  “Turn over.”

  She turned, completely at his command. Her body was so excited it was like a live wire that might explode at any second. He slid a pillow under her hips. She felt the weight of him on her back as he slid back into her from behind, allowing his weight to push her firmly down against the pillow. A white hot pleasure took over her whole body. She felt like he’d just pushed her into some other dimension of physical sensation. His lips were at her ear.

  “Cum for me,” he said in her ear, then pushed the hair away from the back of her neck and gently bit her neck as he pushed deep into her, pressing down with his full weight, pinning her.

  She climaxed. Her head was turned to the side, looking out the small window. The water level had gone over the window so she was looking at the colorful, brightly lit fish moving in big, fanning groups, like whooshes of richly colored fall leaves. She couldn’t move. If he hadn’t been on top of her, she would have flown off the bed. He could feel her whole body vibrate beneath him as her orgasm held her in its grip. She let out a long, orgasmic cry. It felt to her like some giant gong had been hit somewhere in the ocean depths, and its deep vibrations were now centered inside her. He was still nibbling at the back of her neck, mixing a drop of exotic pain to the climatic pleasure. As he slowly let go of her neck, the orgasm began to drift off, slowly slipping away.

  ~ ~ ~

  They slept on the beach. He brought out blankets and pillows and laid them out. She had no idea what time it was, but she knew it was late. Or early. They lay their naked bodies down together, totally spent. She snuggled into the crook of his arm and rested her hand on his chest, watching it drift up and down. The island birds and animals were quiet in consideration of their special guests. The air was warm and fragrant, as if infused with a magical sleep potion. They fell instantly into a deep, heavy sleep.

  She didn’t know how long they slept, but knew it couldn’t have been long. When she opened her eyes, the first light of morning was streaking across the ocean. She looked at him and found he was already awake, staring at the water. He gave her a light kiss. They lay quietly, the morning sun warming their bodies. Eventually they got up and went into the water, allowing to it revive them like a natural elixir as they stretched out their stiff bodies.

  They sailed back in a happy daze. After tying up at the dock, they went inside to find most of the others already up, grabbing breakfast, drifting in and out of the house. Red stood in the kitchen, nursing a cup of coffee, her flaming hair a wild mess.

  “Hey, sunshine,” she said to Terra. “Want some breakfast?”

  “No, thank you. Just coffee.” She found a mug and poured herself a cup.

  “Well, you better eat something. Big day ahead of you.”

  After a shower and a change of clothes, Terra met Nik out on the deck. “You sure you want to do this?” he asked her. “Yes,” she said. “I want to help. Put me to work. Please. I want to be a part of what you’re doing. ”

  Carmine joined them. “’Sup, man?”

  “Hey, Carmine, can you use Terra today to help you?”

  “Of course. Come on. I think I got a tool belt that’ll fit you. We’re building wall frames today.”

  “Okay, great.” Terra said, a bit nervous. She hadn’t really expected to be building anything, just helping out however she could. But Carmine would have none of that. He was a master builder, and very patient in explaining things to her. They spent the afternoon setting and hanging dry wall. It was hard work, and by the end of the day she was exhausted. But it was satisfying. She ran her hands over the smooth walls, taking satisfaction in having helped create something so tangible.

  “Good work, T. You got a knack for it. See you tomorrow,” Carmine said. The next day she helped pour concrete flooring. Terra noticed quickly that there was no deference to her as a girl. Nobody treated her like the weaker sex. Everyone was expected to pull their weight. It was both taxing and liberating. Terra remembered her father always made it seem like she was capable of nothing more than holding a flashlight. Here, the guys didn’t think twice about asking her to grab the wheel barrel and haul over two more bags of concrete mix.

  When she took a shower after working all day, muscles she didn’t know she had ached. She discovered for the first time the satisfaction that could come from physical labor. Looking at her naked body in the mirror, she could see she had gotten leaner and stronger. She developed a deep tan from working outside. Come ‘fire time’, she ate ravenously, and began eating a big breakfast every morning. Every day, her body felt more powerful.

  For the next few weeks, they fell into a rhythm. Every day, Terra would help Carmine with the construction of the buildings, and at night, after fire time and dinner, she and Nik would go to the island. Nik would anchor the boat and dive off, turning on the underwater lights. Sometimes they’d dive, and sometimes they’d go straight to the hull of the boat, eager to get at each other. Usually they’d start with hurried, fevered sex, as if the long wait since the night before had caused their bodies to starve. They’d go at each other with a hunger that grew stronger every night. Afterward, they’d lie together on their backs, or look out the boat window at the brightly lit water and colorful fish.

  After resting, they’d have sex again. Every night, they’d try something different. Their total comfort and openness with each other brought out their adventurous sides. Terra wanted to know every possible way to excite him. Feeling free and more emboldened each night, she was shameless in her quest to learn everything possible about how to please him. She felt he had an unfair advantage in that he seemed to have an inexhaustible sexual knowledge. She was determined to even the score.

  He proved both an expert teacher and a willing subject. As the weeks passed, they explored deeper and deeper pleasures, beyond what Terra knew was possible. She felt enormously empowered as she learned to do to him what he’d many times done to her—bring him just to the brink of orgasm, then not let him cum. At these times, she felt drunk on the power she had over him as she kept him on the edge, in complete control of him as he would writhe and beg her to finish him off. In his delirious state, she’d tease him relentlessly, describing in detail what she was going to do to make him cum. She learned how to stretch his pleasure further and further, and the more she could excite him, the more excited it made her. In the end, they were always exhaustively satiated.

  In the middle of the night, after their bodies were too tired to go further, they’d sleep on the beach on thick blankets, under the warm duvet.

  One night, they got to the island late. They were both extra tried from a long day of work in the hot sun. Instead of going into the hull of the boat, Nik suggested they lie on the beach and look at the stars. They lay on their backs, naked, looking up at the vast night sky. They talked for hours. Nik told her about what life was like in Greece. He told her how he first developed his love for the ocean by taking a small sailboat out by himself to fish when he was only eleven years old, one time going out for three days and nights. Terra talked about college, and why she wanted to be a pediatrician.

  They talked until they were nearly delirious with the need for sleep. Terra had been amazed at how little sleep she was getting, and how little it seemed to affect her. There were nights they only slept a couple hours, but she’d be ready to work the next day, full of energy, as if being with Nik gave her super powers. Now the need for sleep was catching up with her.

  “I’m so happy here,” she said, forcing her eyes to stay open. She’d been careful not to allude to the future. Not to make assumptions or expect that his future plans included her. Her words hung in the air. She couldn’t see his face. “Everybody is, it seems,” she continued, trying to cover. “Red, Carmine, Soren. Allan told me about his life in Boston, how much he hated it. He’s
like a new man, he says. All of them. Everybody seems so… content. Happy to be here, I mean.”

  “Work and love,” he said.

  “What?”

  Nik propped up on his elbow. “It’s what Freud finally concluded. Sigmund Freud. After all his years of analysis, studying people. He was trying to come up with what give a person’s life its… its value. That’s what he come up with. Work and love.”

  His eyes drifted down her body. He traced his fingers from her lips to her thighs, then up her belly and over her breasts. “I think that’s what make people happy. To have work you do that you believe in, something that contributes something to the world. And to do it with someone you…” He paused.

  That look came over him. She hadn’t seen it in awhile. The light from the boat reflected in his eyes, mirroring the ocean water that seemed to be a part of him. She reached up and ran her hand over the stubble of his rough, unshaven face. The look was there. The look of internal struggle. Of needing to say something.

  She pulled him down, kissing him, trying to relieve him of his struggle. She knew he was exhausted, but still he responded to her kiss as if it was the very first time their mouths had met. She slid her hand through his hair as she kissed him deeper, feeling his rough stubble against her mouth. She could feel his pulse beginning to quicken, his chest rising as his breathing increased.

  “Shhhhh,” she whispered in his ear, pushing him down on his back. “My tired boy. You need to sleep.”

  She slid her hand over his chest and down over the ripples of his belly. She continued down with her hand until she cupped his balls, soft and supple in her hand. She loved the delicate, silky texture as she massaging him. She moved her hand to his dick, tenderly holding it. She could feel it growing in her hand. She was always amazed at how fast he reacted to her touch. She squeezed him as he grew firmer, expanding in her hand until he was as solid as a flexed muscle.