So was Gil. He wanted to please Alyssa with a sublime evening and, judging by her smiles and demeanour, he had succeeded. Even the weather had been kind and silently, he damned Caroline’s unexpected departure and wished he were free. Perhaps if he could show Alyssa even a whit of how he felt, it might allay his frustration until doing his duty by Squire Nash. Leaning back in his chair, he decided to wait for an opportunity, taking enjoyment from the expressions flitting across her features and the sparkle of pleasure in her eyes.
‘Hmm … I think I must choose the apricot soufflé, but it is a difficult decision when every morsel has been superb,’ said Alyssa. ‘You employ an excellent chef, Sir Giles.’
‘He is temperamental, as only French chefs can be, but I find him well worth his exorbitant wage,’ he replied. ‘And not only are his wages expensive – an ice house was built last year after François informed me pithily that he could no longer work at an establishment which did not possess one.’
‘Ah, so that is how he concocted these wonderful desserts! Perhaps I should consider an ice house for Hawkscote.’
‘If you decide to, I would happily help you draw up suitable plans.’
She smiled. ‘I am indebted to you once again. “Thank you” seems an inadequate response for your help and advice, but it seems all I can offer in return.’
He shook his head, observing, ‘The only thanks I ask are to see you happy and relieved of burdens, Alyssa.’
She blushed at the warmth in his voice and then, taking a sip of champagne, she regarded him from under her lashes as she said, ‘Sir Giles, I must take you to task.’
Gil furrowed his brow. ‘Oh? Have I offended you?’
‘I asked Dr Plant for his account yesterday and he informed me it had been forwarded to Eastcombe – at your request.’ Alyssa twisted the stem of her glass between her fingers, appearing to study it intently. ‘Of course, I said there must have been a mistake, but he was adamant you gave instructions to that effect and indeed, went on to say he has already received payment.’ She looked up and said accusingly, ‘Have you paid the doctor’s bill on my behalf?’
He nodded. ‘Guilty – but it was not my intention to upset you. My object was to spare you further worry and for that I cannot be sorry.’
‘He seemed astonished that you offered to pay.’
‘I expect he was,’ said Gil, unruffled. ‘But, while I’m grateful for the excellent care he gave you, I don’t give a damn for his opinion on why I chose to pay his bill: your feelings, and yours alone, interest me.’
Alyssa leaned forward and, cupping her chin in her one hand, declared frankly, ‘Well, it was generous, but I really should not allow your impudence to go unpunished!’ Her mouth quivered with suppressed laughter.
He stared at her rosy, trembling lips, a seductive gleam in his eyes. ‘What have you in mind?’ he said, huskily. ‘I have not forgotten the pleasant punishments spoken of at our first dinner.’
Her cheeks grew warmer still. ‘I-I was thinking of something else.’
‘Then I am disappointed,’ he said, looking crestfallen.
‘You are quite abominable,’ she whispered, her mouth curving into a smile. ‘The recompense I had in mind was that you show me this delightful garden without delay.’
‘Gladly!’ He came to stand at her side and, offering his hand, he looked down into her eyes and said, ‘Come with me, Alyssa. There is much I want to share with you.’
Alyssa allowed him to pull her to her feet, and draw her arm once more through his. She had touched very little wine or champagne, but felt intoxicated with exhilaration or happiness – or both. They strolled through the walkways, some covered with climbing roses whose heady scent filled the still, humid air. The sun had disappeared behind ominous grey clouds, but Alyssa did not notice as Gil pointed out the varieties of rose and explained that the original inspiration for the garden came from his mother.
‘She loved roses. On my father’s estate, she designed planting themes and nurtured a rose garden, even experimenting in new varieties. Apart from my father, roses were her greatest passion. I created this garden in her memory, although I am not as knowledgeable on the subject as she was and leave the main work to the gardeners.’
‘Your mother would be proud of what you have achieved,’ she said, ‘I find it fascinating.’
He picked a pink damask bloom and gave it to her, saying softly, ‘But not one of these roses is as beautiful as you are.’
‘You flatter me,’ she murmured. He was very close and she could see the faint shadow along his jaw.
‘No, I could never do so.’ Taking her hands in his, he said urgently, ‘Alyssa, I wish I could make fine speeches! I don’t find it easy to articulate my emotions but I think – I hope – my actions recently might have given you some clue as to how I feel.’
‘You have been very kind—’ she began.
‘Being kind was not my only motive,’ he interjected. ‘Of course, I wanted to help in any way I could, but I want to be more than a friend. After years of searching, I have found what I didn’t think existed—’ He stopped and muttered fiercely, ‘God, I’m making a mull of this! I must find the right words somehow!’
Taking a deep breath, he continued, ‘After my boorish behaviour when we met, I was surprised you spoke to me again. I regretted what I said as soon as it was uttered.’
She glanced down at the strong hands which still grasped hers and then back to his face. His eyes were a vivid blue in the gathering gloom and her voice wavered as she whispered, ‘My behaviour wasn’t without fault – I enjoyed provoking you.’
Gil laughed softly and slid his hands to the top of her arms. ‘So you did, my darling termagant, and you must never stop. How exquisite you look at this moment! With you in my arms, my feelings must find voice: I love you, Alyssa! I desired you from the moment we met but now I love you, not only for your beauty, your elegance, that entrancing dimple that appears when you smile’ – his grasp on her tightened – ‘but for your mind, and your soul. I love your spirit, your laughter, your forthright manner and, in spite of my reserve, the thought of you makes me want to shout from the rooftop with sheer joy. Without you, I have wealth, position and status but I’m only half alive.’
Alyssa gasped and could only gaze up in astonishment.
He pressed on, ‘When you were first ill and I-I thought’ – he raked his fingers through his hair and shuddered – ‘I thought I might lose you, it was unbearable. I’ll never know how I got through those dark hours. I love you with all my heart, and will try my utmost to win you. Damn it all,’ he added fiercely, ‘Brook’s not worth your affection! I won’t rest until I have made you mine. Alyssa, say something before I go mad, even if it is only to rebuke me!’
Thunder sounded in the distance, but Alyssa scarcely heard it over the pounding of her heart. Her silence came partly from shock at his fervent declaration – and for once his emotions were clearly written on his features – and partly from the heady feeling that her wildest dreams were coming true. His mention of Charles brought her back to earth a little: she had barely given him a thought since her illness.
‘Charles?’ she queried, faintly.
Gil made a sound of frustration. His arms stole around her and he muttered thickly, ‘Tell me I have a chance … that you might learn to love me!’
She gave a little laugh which wobbled uncertainly. ‘I might.’
‘Thank God! At least you have not condemned me to a bleak and barren future. Brook is not worthy of you.’
‘But Gil, I—’
He interjected gently, ‘Let me continue – there is something else I need to explain. I would say more now, Alyssa … much more … but I have a matter of honour to settle first. It tears my heart out to be obliged to speak to Caroline, and the squire, but I want no further misunderstandings. Can you appreciate why I must do this?’
The movement of his mouth as he spoke held her fascinated, his lips hovering tantalizingly above her own. ‘Yes,
’ she whispered, ‘as an honourable man, you feel you must first extricate yourself from the arrangement with Miss Nash.’
He nodded and traced one finger down her cheek. ‘It was never official; it was not even consciously done on my part, for, like a piece of flotsam upon the sea, I drifted into her plans while never really caring for her. I must have been mad, and should have put a stop to her manipulative arrogance long ago. I intend to do so at the earliest opportunity. Then, my love, you will have to choose between Brook and me – and I vow to fight hard.’
There was another dull rumble overhead, and a flash of lightning. Large raindrops began to fall from the leaden sky.
His hands moved rhythmically over the smooth fabric of her dress. ‘Never have I wished honour and integrity to the Devil as much as I do now! But, while I may not speak absolutely freely, nothing will prevent me showing you how I feel. Nothing,’ he said, placing a soft kiss on her forehead, ‘will’ – he kissed her again, this time on her cheek – ‘stop’ – and again, nuzzling under her ear – ‘me’ – two more, at the base of her throat and another on the exposed skin of her shoulder – ‘from’ – he feathered his mouth along her jaw making Alyssa moan softly – ‘doing’ – a kiss at the corner of her mouth – ‘this…’ he concluded, as his lips fastened fiercely against hers.
CHAPTER 12
The touch of his lips unleashed a molten longing which broke through any barriers of restraint and Alyssa returned his embrace instinctively; Charles had never attempted to kiss her in this way, and she had never desired him to.
But this was heaven. Alyssa felt the solid warmth of Gil’s body, the pressure of his fingers through her dress as he gathered her closer. His lips – gentle at first, then more demanding – searched, teased, and tasted hers and she rejoiced in every sensation; her body had craved his touch for so long, it welcomed him with a visceral pleasure. Enthralled, she savoured this newly discovered sensual awareness and sank into his embrace, returning his kiss eagerly and sliding one hand up to revel in the feel of his hair against her fingertips. Slowly, enticingly, his lips moved over hers until his kiss left her quivering with desire and she lost any sense of time – was it seconds or minutes until she became dimly aware of the rain beating down steadily?
Gil, aware his fierce need was distilled from of weeks of longing, tried desperately to be tender and briefly succeeded until he felt Alyssa’s eager response. Then, desire seared through him and he kissed her with unbridled passion, wanting to fill her senses until she could think and feel only him. Deepening the kiss, he drew her against him possessively.
Lightning again lit up the sky, followed by a deafening thunderclap, this time directly above. The rain fell faster and drummed out of the clouds with a growing insistence.
‘We should go inside,’ he murmured, against her lips.
‘No, not yet,’ she said softly.
A raindrop trickled down her cheek and Gil kissed it away before his mouth found hers once more, urgent and demanding.
Eventually, he whispered, ‘I love you.’
Alyssa did not reply, not daring to trust her voice at that moment, but she did moan faintly in frustration when he pulled away. Without his enveloping warmth, she felt bereft and wrapped her arms around her body as she shivered: her dress was soaked from the rainstorm which had stripped the warmth from the air.
‘You are cold,’ said Gil, frowning. Placing his coat around her shoulders, he added, ‘Put this on until we reach the house. Damn it, I should be taking better care of you, not keeping you out in a thunderstorm!’
‘But you have been taking care of me … and I’d hardly noticed the rain,’ she said, with a seductive smile.
‘Don’t tempt me further.’ His grin was endearingly lop-sided as he raised his voice to be heard over the rain. ‘I’d willingly stay as we are but it won’t do – you mustn’t risk a chill after your illness.’
Alyssa considered ironically there was no chance of succumbing to a chill while the inferno ignited by his kisses raged inside her. She feasted her eyes on him. The rain had soaked his shirt which now clung to his body like a second skin, revealing a muscled torso and the shadow of dark hair dusted across his chest, and she drew in a deep breath in a vain attempt to regain control over her emotions.
Holding hands, they half-walked, half-ran through the downpour, finally reentering the house through the terrace doors. There, they looked at their muddy, bedraggled state and began to laugh.
After the passion of moments earlier, Alyssa realized this shared laughter was another release, different in expression but no less acute. She felt lighthearted, playful, even exultant, and said softly, ‘If that is your notion of punishment, you can administer it as often as you like!’
With a throaty chuckle, Gil stepped towards her, but he stopped when Marianne hurried in.
‘I wondered if I might find you here – oh, you are both soaked!’ she observed in dismay. ‘Gil, what are you thinking of to keep Alyssa out in this rain?’
‘It was my fault too,’ said Alyssa, smiling at Gil, ‘we – we did not immediately notice it was raining.’
‘Ah, I see,’ Marianne cast a knowing glance from one to the other but said only, ‘Well, you cannot stay in those clothes, Alyssa. Come to my room and I will find you another gown – we are of a similar size, I think.’
Alyssa submitted, pulling the coat closely around her as she followed Marianne. She threw another glance and a smile over her shoulder towards a grinning Gil, who stood with hands on hips as rainwater dripped from his clothes to collect in a pool on the carpet.
Only when the door had closed behind her did Alyssa realize she was still clutching the rose and she quickly concealed it. Alyssa liked Marianne, but was anxious not to promote searching questions, wanting to keep the discoveries she had made this evening to herself for a little longer.
Once upstairs, Alyssa barely attended to Marianne’s gay chatter. Sitting by the fire and dressed in one of Marianne’s elegant robes de chambre, she rubbed her hair dry and responded only when necessary, reflecting on what had happened, glad of these moments to become accustomed to the knowledge that Gil loved her. No other man had touched her heart in the way Gil did. He was what her soul craved and to find he felt the same left her beyond words. Marianne did not ask what had happened, and if she did suspect the cause of Alyssa’s heightened colour, she chose not to pry – for which consideration Alyssa was grateful.
Dressed in one of Marianne’s muslin gowns, it was almost an hour later when Alyssa descended again to the drawing-room. Gil had also changed and his hair, still dark as a raven’s wing with moisture, glistened in the candlelight. He was speaking in muted tones to his brother-in-law but stopped and looked up when they came in.
He smiled at Alyssa, his eyes warm and caressing but holding a hint of concern. ‘I apologize for not bringing you back to the house sooner. You are not cold as a result?’
‘No, quite the reverse,’ she replied, in an admirably even voice.
Satisfaction showed for fleeting moment on his face. ‘You look charming in my sister’s gown.’
‘Yes, how vexing that it suits Alyssa more than me,’ remarked Marianne merrily.
In response to their combined pleas, Alyssa then agreed to stay another hour. She looked at Gil, who had come to stand nearby, and blushed as she confessed, ‘I am enjoying this evening very much.’
‘So am I,’ he murmured.
‘Then it is settled,’ said Marianne, pulling the bell to summon a servant, ‘I’ll ring for tea and the four of us will enjoy a cosy hour. Do you play cards, Alyssa?’
‘Oh yes,’ she replied, adding with a laugh, ‘I believe I am – or perhaps I should say Mr Esidarap is – considered something of an expert!’
‘Mr Esidarap? Who is he?’ asked Marianne, intrigued.
‘A disguise I adopted – and he is an excellent card player as well as a sad rake!’
Oliver raised one eyebrow and a look of quizzical surprise crossed Mar
ianne’s face.
‘You’ll enjoy the story,’ said Gil, laughing, ‘but, as it’s a long and involved one, Alyssa had best enlighten you while we play.’
Oliver moved to the card table and held out a chair for his wife. Gil and Alyssa followed, but as Gil did the same and waited for Alyssa to take her seat, he placed a hand on her shoulder and murmured wickedly into her ear, ‘Remember, my love, I promised to teach Mr Esidarap a lesson when I encountered him over a game of cards.’
She chuckled softly. ‘Wretch! Do your worst then, and we shall see who succeeds.’
‘I’ll claim another kiss if I win.’
‘And what if I win?’
Another grin dawned as he said, ‘Name your prize!’
Her gaze met his. ‘Hmm … I think I should claim two kisses – to be certain I enjoy the first.’
Instantly, his eyes darkened with passion, but Oliver and Marianne were ready to begin so he had no opportunity to reply. The next hour passed very pleasantly: Alyssa chatted with Marianne, and Oliver’s ironic humour and succession of bons mots made for convivial company, but it was her exchanges with Gil which thrilled Alyssa most.
Under his smiles and caressing looks, her cheeks grew warm and, whenever he could do so unseen by his sister and her husband, he swept her fingers to his lips or simply sat back to run his gaze longingly over her. His love shone across the short distance separating them and while no words were spoken, a great deal was understood.
They played with counters for imaginary and ridiculously high stakes which resulted in much hilarity, enhanced by the lurid retelling of Mr Esidarap’s adventures. Alyssa played well and won steadily but, in spite of using all her wits, she suspected Gil was only toying with her and could easily best her efforts when he chose. And so it proved. Gil gradually raised the stakes and won several games in succession. When it seemed that he must win outright, and Alyssa sighed and said she was quite done up and out of counters, he offered to bet his winnings on the outcome of a final deciding game.
The Paradise Will Page 17