"Thank you." She drew in a steadying breath and bit her lower lip. "I was more strung out than I thought."
Sun flew in the window and rested on her upturned face. There were no marks, no flaws. The symmetry was perfect. One half of a heart meeting the other in a delicate point. Her honey brows were perfectly arched; her skin looked as pinkly healthy as a baby's.
He fought the inclination to open his arms to her again. He couldn't let her know how she affected him. Show someone your vulnerability and they'd use it against you. "It's been a rough couple of days."
"Rougher for you than me. You've known about his condition longer."
The teariness still hung on her words. "Laura, you might want to reconsider seeing him tonight. It might be pretty grim."
She straightened her spine. "I won't fall apart."
He touched her arm, his fingers lingering on her skin despite himself. "Look, if just the tension from this morning caused--"
"Nausea? A few tears? I don't hold in my feelings. If they need to come out, I let them. Are you going to hold that against me?"
He dropped his hand and it clenched into a fist. "I'm only thinking of you."
"Really? Or do you want your face to be the first one Dad sees?"
"Don't be ridiculous!"
"Then don't worry about my well-being. Seeing him will be better than what my imagination cooks up." She went to the chair, shrugged into her poncho, and picked up her book.
For a moment he'd felt protective of her. But it was clear she didn't want his protection although she had accepted his comfort. Until it wasn't comfortable. They didn't mix. She was as unpredictable as a shooting star. He was as predictable as a light bulb. She believed feelings should be expressed and shared. He'd found denying his feelings or keeping them to himself was safer.
Six weeks and she'd be gone. That would be best for everybody. Wouldn't it?
CHAPTER FOUR
Mitch stared at Laura as they stood by her father's bedside that evening. He was sure she was going to crumble in front of his eyes. She was as white as chalk, her gray eyes huge as she stroked her father's hand. Mitch could read the love and fear in her eyes. No matter what had happened in the past, at this moment she obviously cared about Ray a great deal. His heart went out to her because he felt the same helplessness she did.
He cupped her elbow and murmured, "Our time's up. He'll look better in the morning."
When she looked at Mitch, her eyes were blank, as if she hadn't understood.
"Let's go," he said gently.
She leaned over her father, kissed his cheek, then let Mitch lead her out. He guided her toward two chairs in the hall as he concentrated on the practical rather than the compassion for her creeping around his heart. "Do you need to sit down?"
She nodded. "My knees are a little wobbly." As she sank onto the orange vinyl chair, her gold triangle earrings swung. "He was so pale. And all the tubes...I guess it shocked me. I thought I'd be able to handle it."
She was so damned up front with what she felt. No excuses. No apologies. How did she do it? Before he reconsidered, he took her hand.
Although she looked surprised, she didn't pull away. Instead she asked, "You're not looking forward to the next six weeks of my being here, are you?"
No, he wasn't. She disturbed his world too much. Just the twist of her smile could make his pulse leap. It was crazy! He was feeling crazy because he wanted to hold her in his arms again like this morning. Ridiculous thought.
Evasiveness was his best bet. "The next six weeks will be difficult for Ray. We talked about rehabilitation before his surgery. He doesn't want to use the hospital's program. When he's ready, a nurse will come to the house three times a week. He wants to get a treadmill, bicycle and weights and use the basement as an exercise room."
Mitch believed Ray's recuperation depended on Laura's involvement and her understanding of what heart surgery entailed. "Exercise is necessary to his recovery. He can be in better shape than he ever was. I have some literature if you want to read it."
"I'd better." She bit her lower lip. "This is new to me. There's so much more involved than just the surgery. It's good you already talked about this with him."
"You know your father. He doesn't like surprises. He wanted everything planned out." That sad look was on her face again. But a moment later, it was gone and he thought he'd imagined it. When their gazes locked, he felt a connection with her that was totally irrational.
Maybe she thought so too because she pulled her hand from under his and stood. "I need fresh air. Let's go for a walk." Five minutes later they were outside. The hospital was spread out. And they had several exits to choose from. Mitch guided Laura out a back exit.
The fall-fragrant breeze wove around them as leaves crackled under their feet. Mitch inhaled, taking in the scent of wood smoke emanating from the circle of houses across from the hospital. They walked briskly in the lighted areas, up and down hills, along sidewalks, down macadam paths.
Suddenly Laura stopped and looked up at the stars. She took in a deep breath and let it out on a sigh. "Isn't this wonderful?"
"What?"
She waved at the stars and the moon. "The sky. I don't get a chance to do this often."
"Walk at night?"
"Um hm. After Mandy goes to bed, I usually have a million things to do."
The moonlight turned Laura's hair into a golden halo as the nipping breeze tousled it. Her gray eyes sparkled with silver lights showing her enthusiasm and joy in life. Any minute he expected her to twirl in a circle like a little girl and let her poncho fly out around her. How long had it been since he'd known joy rather than responsibility? Responsibility for a father who could care less about his younger son, responsibility for his mother so she didn't have to work so hard, responsibility for Carey who thought trouble was something to embrace rather than avoid.
When he'd met Denise, Mitch thought it was time for a stable relationship. And that's just what it had been--stable. Until Denise decided she wanted to get her doctorate. Their break-up hadn't been painless, but it hadn't been...heart wrenching either. Had they both been too removed, adult, practical? Had there been joy?
Laura stepped away from Mitch, away from the shadows of a tall maple, into the moon's full light. "Do you ever wish on the moon?"
Her profile was perfect. It tugged at him as much as the fancy of her question. "I thought people wished on stars."
"The moon's bigger, closer, more touchable."
"That's not very scientific."
"Neither is wishing. But it works."
"You've studied this phenomenon, of course."
She glanced at him, her smile small and mysterious. "Of course. Wishes are like pictures you draw in your mind. They're always there whether you know it or not, just waiting to come to life. When you picture something, you can make it happen."
He regarded her, captivated by her philosophy and the little girl in her that often appeared. "So what are you wishing tonight, or can't you tell me?"
"Sure, I can tell you. Then you can wish it, too. Two wishes are more powerful than one." She stared up at the moon with enough intensity to brand her wish there permanently. "I wish Dad back on his feet, healthier than before."
"I'll second that."
She faced him with a mischievous grin. "See how easy it is? Even for skeptics."
"My life hasn't been what I wished. I have reason to be skeptical." He remembered the night when reality had taken over. He'd been five. If he hadn't overheard the argument, if he could have gone on pretending his father loved him...
"Maybe you just stopped wishing."
Sometimes she was damn clairvoyant. "Maybe." Unbidden, a vivid wish came to mind--his arms surrounding Laura, her legs entangled with his. If Laura's theory was right... "We'd better start back or Mandy will fall asleep again before we get home."
Laura gave him a measured look then rubbed her arms under the wide poncho sleeves as she resumed walking. "Winter's trying t
o break through. I told George and Anne I'd call tonight. I'll have to ask them to send warmer clothes for us."
Mitch matched his pace to hers. "By the time you leave, there will probably be snow on the ground. You'd better tell them to send boots."
She stuffed her hands in her pockets. "And gloves. They'll have to go through all my drawers to find them," she muttered.
"That doesn't bother you?" Privacy was all important to him.
"No. They're my family. They accept who and what I am and would never invade my space to hurt me. I thought you understood that they're like brother and sister to me."
"I understand that. It's just..."
She tilted her face up. "What?"
"Carey went through my belongings without regard to my privacy when we were growing up. He knew it bothered me, so he did it as often as possible." He had never shared that with anyone.
"Kids are like that."
"He was older and should have known better. But he never did care much what others thought."
"You sound bitter."
If she had been judgmental or critical, he would have shut up. But her acceptance led him to ask, "Do I? I thought I'd left my childhood behind. It pops up when I least expect it."
"You and your brother don't get along?"
"It's not a matter of getting along." He knew he was being curt, but to keep the past in the past he had to dismiss it rather than think or talk about it.
After a short silence, Laura asked, "What do you do to relax?"
"Relax?"
"Yeah. You know, when you wear jeans and do something that makes you forget everything else. You do own a pair of jeans, don't you?" The question definitely held criticism if he didn't.
"Of course, I do. More than one." The defensiveness in his voice irritated him.
"And what do you do when you have them on?" she probed with a sideways glance.
"Wash the car, run errands, sketch."
"That sounds like work to me," she scolded. "What about roller skating, tobagonning, dancing, tag?"
"Tag?" He zippered his leather jacket and wondered if he was trying to insulate himself from the weather or her interest.
"Mandy loves when I chase her around the yard, roll in the grass, jump in the leaves."
He could see her and her daughter doing just that. Uninhibited, playful, laughing. God! Had he ever felt like that? Was this the part of Laura that called to him like the Siren's ancient song? "Having a child around helps you relax."
"I'd make time for it even if I didn't have Mandy." She spared him another quick look. "You should try it."
"I don't have time--"
"Hogwash." She waved her hands and said vehemently, "That's what my dad always said. And look where it got him. You're still young enough to learn."
Relaxing wasn't on his priority list. Designing brought him pleasure, the business a sense of achievement. He told himself he didn't need anything else. "You can't teach an old dog new tricks."
"Maybe not. But you can teach an old dog different tricks. Besides, you're nowhere near being old."
"Thirty-six isn't young."
"Like you told your mother, you're only as old as you think you are," she repeated smugly.
He felt like he was trying to beat off a lion with a toothpick. "Don't you miss anything?"
Her smile was pure deviltry. "Not much. C'mon. I'll race you to the front of the building."
She sprinted off and left him standing. He started after her and moments later overtook her, his legs pumping easily, his arms swinging in cadence with his stride. When she arrived at the portico, panting, he casually crossed one ankle over the other, propped against the brick wall, and suppressed a grin. "You fell a little behind."
She leaned against the wall only a few inches from him. "My poncho kept tangling in my legs."
He clicked his tongue and shook his head. "Excuses, excuses."
She wrinkled her nose at him and jabbed him in the ribs with her elbow. "We did it for fun. Not to see who'd win."
She was so close, her hair mussed, her face flushed. He was sure she'd look like this after making love--glowing, vibrant, her hair jumbled from his fingers, her skin pink and damp from kissing and arousal. Her breaths were still coming fast. Her scent mingled with the night air and radiated from her with the heat of their run.
He turned toward her and propped his hand on the wall above her shoulder. "Was it fun?"
Her eyes dropped to his lips and her voice was low. "Sure. The wind in my face, the release of energy, the moon streaking through the leaves..."
If he leaned any closer, their bodies would touch. Desire stirred and pulsed its demand. When her tongue sneaked out and wet her bottom lip, he almost groaned. Her pupils were dark, almost overtaking the gray. If he merely touched her cheek...
Laura was afraid to move when Mitch's fingers brushed her cheek. Every nerve vibrated and hot feelings blazed through her. She forgot Mitch wasn't her type. She wanted him to kiss her more than she wanted to breathe. She wanted to teach him how to enjoy everyday pleasures, to look for excitement. She was excited now. And scared. If a relationship developed between them, it would be complicated by her father, Mitch's perceptions about her, her six week stay. But it felt so good to be attracted to Mitch, to experience the thrill of arousal, to want to touch a man again and have him touch her.
The sliding glass doors to the visitors' entrance whirred open. Mitch stepped back and away. Laura's disappointment plunged deep, shaking her. She was feeling too much, too fast. She wasn't a teenager any longer, she was a rational adult.
So was Mitch. The problem was he acted like it, she thought, as he pulled himself up straight and tall, his eyes denying the closeness they'd just experienced.
***
Nora and Mandy were building a bridge with wooden blocks when Mitch and Laura returned to the house. As soon as they walked into the kitchen, Nora asked, "How is he?"
Her worry for Ray touched Laura. It seemed to be more than concern for a stranger and she wondered again how well Nora knew her father. "He's doing as well as can be expected." The lump in her throat threatened to bring tears to her eyes. Before it could, she hugged her daughter and tickled her.
Mandy giggled. "Don't, Mommy. My bridge will fall down."
Mitch came around to Mandy's other side, turned the chair beside her around and straddled the seat, his arms crossed on the top rung. He studied every angle of the structure. "It's a sturdy bridge. You and Mom do good work. Maybe when you grow up, you can build real bridges."
So...something else learned about Mitch, Laura thought. He believed a man or a woman could be whatever they dreamed. Interesting.
Mandy shook her head. "I want to be a ballerina."
"This week," Laura mumbled. "Last week she wanted to be an animal doctor."
Nora rose and stepped away from the table. "Mitch, why don't you help Mandy build a tower while I talk to Laura."
His brows lifted but he didn't comment.
Curiously Laura followed Nora to the living room. She asked immediately, "Is something wrong? I'm sorry we weren't back sooner. If you want to go home now--"
Nora's fingers moved nervously. She sat on the edge of the sofa, looking hesitant to speak her mind. "I don't want to go home. I...I mean...today and yesterday I felt...useful again. The kids at the day care center are always glad to see me but that's just a few hours two days a week. Since I stopped working, I have a lot of time on my hands. Mitch doesn't want me to work but he doesn't understand."
From the little Mitch had said, Laura guessed Nora had had a hard life and he wanted to make it as easy for her as he could now. She admired him for that, but she also realized he wasn't tuned in to his mother's feelings.
Laura parked next to Nora. "You want to feel like you make a difference."
Nora's blue eyes found Laura's. "Exactly."
Laura was puzzled. "But why did you want to talk to me about this?"
"Because I like taking care of Mandy
and I think she's already fond of me. What are you going to do with her when you're helping at the store?"
Laura finally understood Nora's earnestness and what she had in mind. "Truthfully, I haven't thought about it. I don't want to put her in day care." To find out exactly what Nora was thinking, she added, "I guess I could take her with me."
"The poor little tyke will get so bored," Nora blurted out. "Let me stay here and take care of her. I can cook the meals and take care of details so you can keep your mind on your dad and the store and have time for Mandy when you get home." She rushed on. "Have you thought about what you're going to do when Ray comes home? Someone will have to stay with him for a while. If I'm here with Mandy, I can look after both of them."
Laura leaned against the sofa back. "Do you know what you're thinking about? Taking care of a four-year-old is hard enough, but Dad could be very demanding."
"He just needs some tender loving care." Quickly, she added, "Not that you can't give it to him, of course."
Nora's cheeks were pink, her eyes bright. Laura smiled. Did Nora have an interest in Ray? If so, did Mitch know? "So you'd like to stay here and take on the monumental job of taking care of all of us?"
"Yes, I'd like to do that."
"Does Mitch know about this?" He could be one very tall obstacle, though she didn't believe Mitch could refuse his mother anything.
"No. I wanted to talk to you first."
How would Mitch feel about his mother working for Ray Applegate? "When Dad's feeling better, I'll have to ask him what he's willing to pay."
Nora held up her hand like a stop sign. "No, I don't want money. I've offered--"
"If we can't pay you, we can't accept your help." Laura was sure her father would feel the same way.
Nora looked indecisive, but only for a moment. "All right. But whatever you and Ray decide will be fine."
Laura patted the older woman's hand. "It's a deal. But I'm going to disappear while you tell Mitch. Mandy and I will go upstairs to call our friends in Ohio, then I'll read to her for a while."
Nora rose with a broad smile. "What time would you like breakfast tomorrow?"
Laura chuckled. "This is going to take getting used to. I'll help you as much as I can."
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