“Well, the holidays are the next week!” she said. “We can do whatever we want and go wherever we want! Some people are going home, but that’s silly. Others are going to some exclusive destinations far from here, but I think that’s boring. I’m sure you and Michael have something better in mind.”
I certainly hadn’t expected the holidays to come so fast, but now when I knew that was already next week, a small smile started to creep up my face. After weeks of exams and being busy, I could finally spend some quality time with Michael. We hadn’t really talked about what we would do during the holidays, but I had something in my mind. And I was sure he’d accept, because how could he ever refuse me?
The only problem was that I needed Adrian’s help to do it, because having a romantic day with Michael would cost me a lot of my self-control. For the last two months, Adrian and I had spent less time together. He was busy working on the journal, and I came to him only when I needed to, but only for a few hours. Neither of us wanted to become dependent on the other one.
“Sure we have,” I said. “What about you? Are you going somewhere?”
“Umm, I don’t know yet,” she said. “Adrian told me not to count on him.”
“Why not?” I said, wanting to know more for me than for her. His plans could ruin mine, and I didn’t want that to happen.
“He said he had other plans,” she said. “So I think I’ll just stay here and do some researching.”
“But you were doing that all the time!” I said. I had no idea how she managed to both study and do it, but I guessed she was just that crazy about it.
“Not as much as I wanted to.” She smiled. “And there’s nothing much I can do anyway, except go home. I don’t want to go home.”
“Yeah,” I said. I couldn’t force Adrian to be with her, but I also couldn’t take her with me and Michael.
“Don’t worry about me,” she said. “So, you said you had something in mind?”
“I haven't told Michael yet,” I said. “But I’d like to go to that lake that is a few miles away from here. It sounds romantic.”
“Wait, you are willing to spend a day in the nature? With bugs and wild animals… and what else did you say when I suggested something like that a few years ago?” She laughed. I wasn’t really thrilled by it, but at least there wouldn’t be a lot of people. Besides, lakes and nature were supposed to be calm places, so everyone’s elements should stay deep inside, together with my disease.
“Anything for Michael,” I said.
“You really love him, don’t you?” she said, and I just nodded. “Have you thought about the future?”
“No, I don’t want to,” I said. “We can’t know what will happen. It would be a waste of time to try to plan something.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” she said. We hadn’t wanted to think about the future at the beginning of our relationships, and now even less.
“Well.” I got up from the bed. “I have to go talk to Michael. I don’t want anything to ruin my plan for us.”
“Good luck.” Paula smiled, and we hugged. I immediately hurried to Adrian’s room and found him surrounded by books. That shocked me so much that I stopped dead in my tracks. He looked up at me and smiled.
“It isn’t what it looks like,” he said, pulling the journal out from the pile of notebooks. “I just can’t risk anyone to see it.”
“That makes more sense,” I said, trying to remember what the hell I had come for. Ah, yeah, the holiday plans.
“What do you need?” he said, hiding the journal back under a book.
“I really need you to be here the next week,” I said.
“Why?”
“Because I want to spend some time with my boyfriend,” I said. “And, unfortunately, I can’t do that without your help.”
“Ah, you want to have sex with him,” he said.
“No! I just want to be with him.” I frowned. “There are better things to do with your loved one than just have sex!”
“Whatever you say,” he said. Well, I definitely didn’t expect him to understand.
“Look, this is really important to me,” I said. “I love Michael, and the moments I spend with him now are so rare… Please, don’t take that away from me.”
Adrian watched me for a moment, and I tried to look as miserable as possible. Surely he could have a bit of compassion somewhere deep inside. Besides, I couldn’t think of what he could possibly be doing that didn’t include being here.
Just as he opened his mouth to say something, the door swung open. I turned around, startled. I wasn’t used to anyone coming in here, especially not without knocking. Alan stood there in the door, looking as surprised as I was.
“Can’t you fucking knock?” Adrian said, annoyed.
“I didn’t know you had company,” he said and smiled at me. “Hello, Ria. Didn’t expect to see you here.”
“I just came… for my notebook,” I said, grabbing the first notebook from Adrian’s pile that I could get hold on. “I was going anyway.”
“Oh, there’s no need for you to go now, Ria,” Alan said. “Maybe you could help Adrian to pass an exam for once.”
There was an edge to his voice that I didn’t like, and I was sure Adrian didn’t either.
“What do you want?” Adrian said.
“Just came to check are you going to Riversbrough next week,” he said. I froze. That damned place was hours away from here! If he went there, there was no way I could survive alone here with Michael. He looked at me, saw the panic written all over my face, and closed his eyes for a moment.
“No,” he said. “I’m not going.”
I relaxed, but Alan’s eyes went wide.
“You’re not?” he said. “Why? You go every year! You said you wouldn’t miss it for anything in the world.”
“I changed my mind,” Adrian said grimly. Now I felt a bit lost in the conversation. Why would Adrian go to some small place every year? It didn’t make any sense.
“Adrian,” Alan said, “is something wrong? I can’t imagine why you wouldn’t want to visit your parents’ grave.”
I stared at Alan and then at Adrian, my mind too foggy to react.
“You heard me!” Adrian yelled. “I. Don’t. Want. To. Go!”
“Fine,” Alan said, confused. “If that’s what you want.”
With that, Alan walked out of the room.
“Why did you…?” I looked at Adrian, unsure what exactly to say. His parents were obviously important to him, so why would he throw it all away… for me?
“You’re alive. They’re dead,” he said, avoiding my eyes.
“Yeah, but I didn’t know about your plans!”
“Do you want to be with Michael or not?” He finally looked at me, his eyes shining like a silver blade.
“I want, but…”
“Then you better get the fuck out of here before I change my mind,” he said.
“Thanks.” I took hold of his hand. “I will never forget this.”
“You better not,” he said, and I hurried to find Michael, who without any doubt would agree with my plan. And that was exactly what happened.
Chapter 21
The lake was one of the most beautiful places I had ever seen. The water had a nice green-blue color to it that for some weird reason reminded me of Paula’s eyes. The sun shined brightly down on us as we were lying there in the grass. My head rested on Michael chest, and he was running his fingers through my hair. There was no one else around us except the trees and flowers.
“What is it about you that drives me crazy?” Michael murmured.
“My hair?” I offered.
“That too.” He laughed and kissed the top of my head.
“So, why do you love me?” I lifted my head up to look at him. The breeze played with his wavy brown hair, the sun making him squint his green eyes. My eyes focused on the fullness of his lips. I so badly wanted to kiss him.
“I love you because you’re beautiful and smart a
nd funny and…” He couldn’t say anything else because I pressed my lips against his. At that moment, nothing else mattered except us. I felt like I could fly. But as his hands slid under my white top, there was suddenly too much water around me. I gasped for breath, breaking away from him.
“Let’s do something crazy,” I said, not willing to let my disease ruin our day.
“Like what?” he asked.
“Go swimming,” I said, getting up. His eyebrows shot upward.
“It’s forbidden,” he said. “Besides, we don’t have…”
I gave him a significant look. For a second, I thought I could see him blushing.
“Come on,” I said. “There’s no one around here.”
“Yeah, but…”
“Don’t tell me you’re afraid!” I said, crossing my arms. “Well, I can always go without you…”
“Hey! I’m coming!”
“Good!” I said and started running towards the lake, not waiting for him. I knew he’d be right behind my back. Just as I was nearing the lake, I pulled off my top and threw it to the ground. I had to stop to take off my sneakers and jeans, and that was enough time for Michael to catch up with me. He was taking off his clothes too, and I smiled, walking into the lake just in my black panties and bra.
The cool water felt good on my skin as I dived into it, and that scared me for a moment. It was way too close to how I felt when Michael’s element awoke. Water had always been water. Only this water didn’t call to me and I didn’t want to drink it all up.
I felt Michael’s arms around my waist and I turned around, putting my hands around his neck. The water came nearly to my shoulders, so he lifted me up, and I pressed myself closer to his hard chest. We were frozen for a moment, just standing there and staring into each other’s eyes. Every moment we had spent together passed in flashes through my mind… every moment except that only night when we’d made love, which I would never remember.
“Is something wrong?” Michael’s eyes were full of concern for me, and I knew mine were pooling with tears. I loved Michael, but there were just so many secrets between us now. Why couldn’t I just tell him everything? Why was I so afraid of losing him when I had probably already lost him? By looking again at Michael’s face, I suddenly knew why. I wanted to keep him as long as possible. I wanted to love him. I wanted to be happy.
“I love you,” I choked out, trying hard not to cry.
“I love you too,” Michael whispered, kissing my lips. Happy. That was what I had to do. Just be happy. I let go of Michael and laughed.
“Catch me if you can!” I said and started swimming as fast as I could towards the opposite side of the lake. If Michael was confused by my weird mood swings, he didn’t show it. He just grinned at me and gave me a nice head start before coming after me.
We ended up lying on the shore, getting mud all over the blanket Michael had brought just in case we needed it. Well, we didn’t really mind as long as that mud didn’t get all over our skin and underwear. Michael held my hand while he was telling me stories about his childhood. He told me how he loved to climb trees and go fishing with his father. It was nice to hear more about him and his life.
“I’m going to tell you a secret,” Michael said, and I raised an eyebrow at him.
“You have a secret?”
“Yeah.” He laughed. “Isn’t that strange? I can’t seem to keep anything from you.”
“No, you can’t, my love,” I said. “Spill it out.”
“I bought a house not far from here,” he said. I propped myself on my elbows and stared at him.
“Why?”
“I saw it some time ago,” he said. “It’s out of the town, in the nature… it’s gorgeous. And big enough for tons of children.”
“Tons of children?” I said, my voice strained. Michael looked at me and laughed.
“Two at least,” he said. I just blinked at him.
“Oh, alright,” I said. It was a little bit hard to believe he was already thinking about having kids. I don’t know, but it just felt wrong. And not only because I was sure I couldn’t have kids with him… Hell, I couldn’t even live with him.
“I’ll do anything that it takes to be with you, Ria,” he said, determined. I could only smile at him and wish that this moment would last.
We spent the rest of the week visiting different places around here. It was surprising how many truly beautiful sights were hidden behind the trees and wild bushes. We even found a tree house and spent a while there. The whole week had been just awesome, and I was sad when it came to an end.
Chapter 22
More exams and only more exams; that was our new reality. The end of the academic year was nearing and everyone wanted to… well, survive. I was already sick of studying and everything, especially because it meant I had to spend more time around Adrian.
Paula and I were walking down the hall when she suddenly stopped me and pulled me aside.
“I’m preparing a party,” she said. “But you mustn’t tell anyone.”
“Oh, come on,” I said. “Everyone always knows about secret parties. But why are you having one now? Don’t you have to… study?”
“Yeah, but it’s for Adrian’s birthday.” She smiled. “I got the permission to use the lunchroom and I’m going to need everyone’s help.”
Unbelievable. No one had ever gotten the permission for doing such a thing. I guess she’d asked Alan and, since I didn’t think Adrian had ever had a real birthday party since his parents' death, he’d allowed it.
“Sure, count on me,” I said.
“Thank you!” she squealed, throwing her arms around me. That party must be the most important thing to her at the moment.
“So, how many people will come?” I asked.
“Everyone!” she said. “At least I hope so. Even though I’m not sure I want all those girls at the party.”
There was something bitter in her voice, and I had to bite my lip to stop myself from smiling. It was hard not to be jealous when almost every girl at the university wanted your boy. Of course, there were girls who wanted Michael too, but Michael wasn’t Adrian, so I didn’t have to worry so much.
“It will be fine,” I assured her. “But I don’t think you’ll manage to keep that kind of a party a secret. Adrian will find out.”
“No, he won’t!” she said. “Everyone promised not to tell.”
“Yeah, sure they did,” I said, but she didn’t seem to notice the sarcastic tone in my voice.
“Ok, so you’re coming. Tell Michael, will you?” she said, taking out a small notebook and checking something.
“Sure,” I said. She smiled again and then she noticed someone passing by and ran after him. Wow, who thought Paula would be organizing a party instead of spending all her time on doing the research? Adrian was obviously that important to her. If only she would see that he didn’t love her and had no interest in making her happy.
I checked the time on my mobile phone and figured it was a good time to visit the boy in question. Michael had a Literature class and he wouldn’t be free for the next two hours, and Paula was too busy hunting down people for the party. I found Adrian in his room, still working on the journal.
“Hey,” I said, sitting down next to him, close enough for our shoulders to touch. That small contact took away the whole world of elements around us.
“Did Paula invite you to my birthday party?” He rolled his eyes and focused back on underlining the letters in the journal.
“Umm, yeah, but you weren’t supposed to know about it.”
“Oh, please. When someone managed to hide anything around here?” he said. “Especially if it’s a huge party.”
“Yeah, I guess that’s hard to hide,” I said. “Which one of your lovers told you?”
“I don’t have lovers.” He looked up at me, a glint of amusement in his gray-blue eyes.
“I don’t believe you,” I said.
“You don’t have to.” He smiled. Maybe I hadn’t s
een any girls around him, but that didn’t mean he hadn’t gone after them when I had been away.
“Anything interesting in the journal?” I tried to read the underlined letters, but Adrian closed the journal.
“Yes and no,” he said. “There’s indication that at least four Council members had the disease. But the others didn’t know about it.”
“Council members? There should be more information about them somewhere.” I frowned. “Is there anything on the Internet?”
“Nothing suspicious,” he said. “But one guy had an affair with some unknown girl and his divorce was all over the news. Maybe he contracted it from his lover.”
“That’s plausible,” I said. “What about the others? I mean, are there more people mentioned who had the disease?”
“Yeah, but no one famous or anyone I’ve heard of.”
“Pity,” I said, glancing over at the pile of books on his desk. The books looked untouched, of course.
“Maybe I’ll discover something more later,” he said.
“Maybe,” I said. “Are you planning to fail everything again?”
“Yeah, that’s the plan,” he said. I frowned.
“You can’t do that. They’ll kick you out,” I said. And once I’d hoped for it to happen, but now I needed him and I wasn’t sure I could stay here without him around.
“So?” He smiled. “Would you miss me?”
“Yeah, I would. I’d have to kill someone,” I said. “And I don’t want that to happen.”
“I’ll worry about it in the fall,” he said, running his fingers down my arm.
“But you have to pass the exams!” I said. “Or you keep thinking it’s cool to be in the first year forever?”
“What’s the point, Ria?” he said. “It’s not like I need a degree to die happy.”
I sighed. It was completely impossible to convince him that maybe things weren’t so bleak, but then again, maybe he was right. But I wasn’t willing to give up on anything just yet.
“Never mind,” I said. “We've had that conversation already.”
“Yeah, and I haven’t changed my mind since then,” he said, the tone of his voice implying that he didn’t change his mind as I did about things. Gah, he was annoying sometimes.
Dangerous (Element Preservers Series, Book 1) Page 18