by Cutter, Leah
The judge banged on his desk, then yelled at the court in their native tongue. The laughter gave way to an uneasy silence. The judge then repeated his words in Xiao Yen's language.
“Though you are a foreigner, Fu Xi Wén, these people will treat you with the same respect as one native born. I will have order,” he continued, almost muttering under his breath. There was another pause before the judge directed Xiao Yen to continue.
Xiao Yen didn't look up. She felt heartened. “I'd stopped to look for my center, for my peace.” Xiao Yen paused. The stillness in her core was unreachable, but just for now. A slight wind sounded under all her words. Her calm was still there.
Shouting started at the back of the room. The sergeant ran from his place next to the judge to investigate. His gravelly voice rode over the others for a moment then the other voices drowned his out.
“Silence!” the judge yelled.
Even Xiao Yen understood the foreign word.
“Sir, sir,” called another voice. Xiao Yen recognized Tuo Nu. He spoke to the judge in their own language.
The onlookers gasped as a whole, then fell silent. Xiao Yen hid her smile when she heard the new voices. Not only Udo, but Ehran as well had come to her defense. There was a moment of consultation between the brothers and Tuo Nu, before Ehran began to speak. He spoke clearly and slowly in his language.
Xiao Yen wondered for a moment, then realized it was better that Ehran, not Udo, speak. He looked more like someone from the Middle Kingdom. His words would be more easily believed. Tuo Nu translated.
“Honorable sir, please excuse this disturbance. But when I heard you were wrongly accusing the great dragon slayer Xiao Yen, I had to come. She killed the rat dragon, the one living outside of Khan Hua, by making it fly into a cliff. When she saw your dragon rise out of the sea, she didn't run or hide, or try to protect herself. Instead, she went into a deep trance, to raise her powers, so she could make your dragon fly into a cliff as well. She would have succeeded, if someone hadn't disturbed her.”
The judge paused until the whispered translations of what Ehran said were finished. Then he said, “You are foreigners here. You do not understand our ways. That rat dragon of which you speak was an abomination. I'm glad that it has been slain. But our sea dragon is no An Ao. Even though it breathes fire, it isn't evil. It's a part of the cycle of our lives. To kill it would be to kill our town, our way of life. If it doesn't rise in the fall, there are no winter rains. Long ago we negotiated a peace with our dragon. You have broken that peace, woken the dragon out of time, in the wrong month, with no offerings, no direction for where it should go. It needs to be lulled back into the sea.”
Udo spoke now. He told everyone how clever Xiao Yen was, and that she could send the dragon back to the sea.
“Why should we trust your mage to send our dragon back into the sea, and not send it against Khuangho again?” the judge asked.
“You can hold me as hostage,” Udo said.
The judge paused and considered for a moment.
“Besides,” Tuo Nu added in the language of the Middle Kingdom, “who else can you afford to send?”
Xiao Yen kept her surprise from spreading to her face. Tuo Nu would charge the town for his services? Why? Didn't he consider this his home?
The judge cleared his throat. “Fu Xi Wén, the court will address you. You may rise,” the judge said.
Xiao Yen stood slowly, her knees stiff from having knelt for so long. She had to bend her head back very far to see his face, almost as much as when she'd stood before Bei Xi in her natural form. Xiao Yen stood motionless, mindful of the judge's warning that he'd whip her.
“I charge you with attempted murder. The only way for you to dispel the charge against you is to do the court's bidding, which is to convince the sea dragon to return to its home, and not to rise again until autumn.”
Xiao Yen bowed her head, accepting the charge.
* * *
“Why won't you deal with the dragon? You're a much stronger mage than I am,” Xiao Yen said, hurrying to keep up with Tuo Nu as he walked along the winding main street of Khuangho.
Udo kept up easily on the other side, also harassing Tuo Nu, like two peasants beating up on a merchant, trying to get a better deal. Three court soldiers marched after them. The judge had decided to not lock them up, but to let them roam the town, as long as they took the soldiers with them. He knew that no one would help the foreigners escape.
Four or five people trailed after the soldiers, onlookers from the court, staring at Udo and Xiao Yen. Ehran had his own soldiers as well as his own crowd. He'd purposefully drawn them after him by producing dice and starting a game of chance in the common area of their inn. Though Khuangho was a seaport, and saw foreigners occasionally, the people still stared. Xiao Yen figured that more of the crowd stayed with Ehran for three reasons: though Xiao Yen was a foreigner, she didn't look like one; she was an unknown mage, with possibly dangerous and unlucky powers; and she stayed close to Tuo Nu, a known mage, that the people in the town probably didn't want to anger.
“I must be paid for my work. And they can't pay me enough,” Tuo Nu said.
All the fires had been put out. Merchants had opened their shops again. The wine seller they passed had attracted many boisterous men, and the noodle shop next door was also doing a brisk business. Only a few children played in the street though, and Xiao Yen didn't see any farmers or fishermen hawking their goods, or any scholars. It was like the first day of ghost month, when no one bought or sold anything for fear of making the just-awakened ghosts jealous.
“Why would you charge so much?” Xiao Yen asked.
“You wouldn't understand,” Tuo Nu said.
He turned off the main street into a narrow alley. The walls along either side were high and well maintained, made out of solid stone. Some of the gates were painted bright red, but most of them weren't adorned. About halfway down the street, Tuo Nu stopped and unlocked the plain wooden gate to his compound. As soon it was open, Udo pushed himself past Tuo Nu, going in uninvited.
Tuo Nu looked after him for a moment, his mouth open. Then he shrugged, shook his head, and turned to Xiao Yen. “Won't you please come in and have some tea?” Tuo Nu said, making a low bow, like a courtier.
Xiao Yen accepted with the barest incline of her head and floated across the threshold like a courtesan.
Tuo Nu rented rooms in a shared compound, with other tenants. White and yellow pebbles covered the courtyard. A few weeds sprang up between the rocks. Wang Tie-Tie wouldn't have approved at all.
A one-story wooden building lined the courtyard walls. It was divided into several apartments. Slate tiles led from the gate to the center apartment. A broad wooden stoop ran in front of the building, and the roof extended over it. Two young children with dirty faces played in the southern corner. They squealed and ran inside the closest door when they saw Udo.
Tuo Nu invited the soldiers into the courtyard but locked the gate against the other people who still followed them. One of the soldiers stayed next to the courtyard door. Tuo Nu led Xiao Yen and Udo up the path to the corner rooms on the southwest side. He opened the door to a dark room, then walked across and untied the shutters, letting the sun spill in.
The walls and floor were made of a pale wood, with many knots. Xiao Yen smelled pine trees. Wind blew through the rooms, a constant roar, like the ocean. The apartment was small, only two rooms—a general sitting room with many pillows scattered around a low table under the southern window, and a sleeping room, separated by a white silk curtain painted with a large blue-and-white vase holding brilliant red peonies.
On the shelves next to the window stood dull-silver foreign mugs, a dark green clay frog, and a small painting of four of the eight precious things of a scholar: books, money, pink flowered herbs of immortality and clouds of good luck. On the opposite side, a shelf held a painting covered with a piece of dazzling yellow silk, that Xiao Yen assumed was a portrait of a god that Tuo Nu prayed to
. Small empty cups stood under this painting, along with the ashy remains of incense.
Though the room was full of sunlight and wind, it reminded Xiao Yen of Master Wei's room, a room for study and consideration. Like her little room at the school. She suddenly missed it, and swallowed hard to beat down the lump in her throat. Then she took a deep breath. She could have a place like this too. She'd chosen her peace.
The two remaining soldiers arranged themselves on either side of the door. Udo continued to hassle Tuo Nu, asking him why he couldn't subdue the dragon, why it had to be Xiao Yen.
Finally Tuo Nu turned to Xiao Yen and said in her language, “I'll explain it to you. I doubt this foreigner will ever understand.”
Udo opened his mouth to say something more. Xiao Yen looked at him and held up her hand. He shut it again.
“My magic . . .” Tuo Nu hesitated then started again. “My magic is different from yours.”
Xiao Yen already knew that, having tasted the Wind of God.
“It isn't just the wind or the movement or stillness. I only studied with my master for three years—not because I was a poor student, but because that's all that was needed. My magic isn't about ritual, or knowledge, or discipline. I don't have to study and practice every day like you do. My magic is powered by my life. Every spell I cast drains years from me.”
Xiao Yen understood now why Tuo Nu's magic was so elemental. Why it seemed so powerful. He didn't work with artifacts, like she did. And he paid a heavy price for it.
“That's why I'm so exhausted after I cast a spell. I need to get a good, profitable job now, while I'm young, so that when I'm older, I won't have to cast spells.” Tuo Nu paused for a moment, then added, “You're lucky. Your magic doesn't steal your life.”
Xiao Yen turned away. Her magic “stole” her life, just as much as Tuo Nu's. Her magic took away her ability to have a normal existence, to have children and a husband, to stay close to her family. There could be substitutes, like protecting horses or a town, but it wasn't the same.
“To make the dragon go back to the sea would cost me a big spell. Maybe take ten years from my life. The town doesn't have enough money to pay me for that,” he said.
“Then I do it, I chase dragon away,” Xiao Yen said in Udo's language, so that both men understood her.
“How?” Udo asked. “I thought your magic was gone.”
Xiao Yen ignored his question and asked Udo one of her own. “Why you tell the judge I defeat dragon?” she asked.
“So you could escape,” he said. “You did the same thing for me. You put yourself into jeopardy, at risk, for me. I will do the same for you. Particularly after I helped you lose your magic, hurt your soul.”
Xiao Yen looked down, her cheeks burning hot with embarrassment over his offer. No one had ever sacrificed themselves for her. No one had even tried to understand her magic. The memory of what happened in that cold courtyard, with those men, brought familiar feelings of fear and revulsion, but the feelings weren't as strong as before. She'd lived through the actual act. Now she could live with the memory.
Tuo Nu, too, was curious. “Do you still hear the Wind of God?” he asked.
“I do,” Xiao Yen replied, still using Udo's language. “But more quiet. My quiet back too. Mixed.”
Tuo Nu would have asked more questions, but Xiao Yen held up her hand and spoke again in her own language.
“I need to practice. Please, may I stay here for the afternoon and work?” she asked.
Tuo Nu said, “Of course. I may have something for you to work with.”
He went into the second room, then returned a moment later with a large, flat, unpainted wooden box. Ceremoniously he carried it over his head, so his breath wouldn't spoil the contents. He laid it on one of the pillows and opened it with a great flourish.
Inside lay brilliant white sheets of paper. Xiao Yen picked one up in amazement. She'd never seen paper so white or pure. Both sides were smooth. It was thicker than the paper she was used to working with. It would be more difficult to create fine or delicate creatures with this paper. For easier animals, or for designs she was familiar with, it was perfect.
“Why—” she started to ask Tuo Nu, but he interrupted.
“Every guild has their secrets,” he said.
Xiao Yen didn't ask anymore. She wasn't surprised he used paper in his rituals. Many people made paper effigies to burn during worship.
Tuo Nu insisted that she take all of the paper, transferring the sheets from his box to her bag himself. Then he ushered Udo out the door, taking one of the soldiers with him, calling over his shoulder, “We'll meet you for dinner.”
Xiao Yen forced herself to forget the guard standing at the door. She turned and positioned herself so she looked out the window. The wind in her head abated, though it still gusted through her silence now and again.
When Xiao Yen felt her peace settle into her bones, she lowered her forehead to the ground three times. Then she reached for the first piece of paper, and started folding.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Bao Fang
Xiao Yen stood in line and tugged on her amulet. She stifled a yawn. She hadn't slept soundly the night before. If she were truthful, Xiao Yen hadn't slept much since she'd spat in the well the week before. She couldn't remember her dreams, but she'd woken every night sweating, her teeth clenched and her hands tightened into fists, as if she'd been fighting demons.
Though the sun shone down brightly on the freshly scrubbed square, and the day was warmer than usual for spring, she still felt cold every time the soft breeze played with her long black braids. She'd spat into the Jing Long's well. Now, on his birthday, would he enact his retribution? She couldn't avoid going to pay her respects. Everyone in Bao Fang was expected to take part in the ritual.
Fu Be Be stood in line before her, dressed in her best silver jacket with golden pine boughs embroidered on it. She chatted with Gan Ou and played with Little Bear, the baby. Gan Ou's jacket was made of shiny verdant silk and covered with patterns of dark green pine boughs and red berries. Even Xiao Yen could tell the material wasn't good quality.
Xiao Yen couldn't see over the heads of those standing in line in front of her, so she moved to one side. A large, wooden, brightly painted façade covered the well. Though she couldn't see them, Xiao Yen heard the musicians standing next to the entrance, banging their drums and cymbals. She rubbed her amulet harder, wishing she didn't have to go. The pit of her stomach rumbled warnings. She shifted the flowers she carried from one hand to the other.
Bing Yu emerged from the doorway to the well. She looked as happy as ever. Maybe she'd escaped. Maybe Jing Long wouldn't do anything to either of them. A nauseating dread still stalked Xiao Yen.
When they arrived at the false portico, Fu Be Be indicated with her hands that Xiao Yen should accompany her. It was too loud to speak with the musicians so close.
Xiao Yen stepped back, signifying her wish to face the dragon alone. Master Wei had performed her graduation ceremony the previous night. She was no longer a student, no longer a child. She was an adult. Fu Be Be sniffed her disapproval but didn't say anything as she turned and went through the low entrance.
“Life is choice,” Master Wei had told the students. Choose your weapon, choose your fighting space, choose your life.
Xiao Yen wanted to believe his words, but she was filled with doubt. She wasn't a man, able to choose a destiny or fight against fate. Either Fu Be Be would find her a husband, or Wang Tie-Tie would find her a position. Or maybe the dragon would choose. She could only wait, and see whose will was strongest. She'd given up fighting.
She'd given up her right to choose.
When Fu Be Be came out, she didn't look at either of her daughters. Gan Ou went into the temple next, holding her son close to her breast. Xiao Yen couldn't stand still. She clutched her luck with one hand, then the other. She closed her eyes for a moment, searching for any magic that might be around. She felt nothing. Maybe Bing Yu was right
.
After Gan Ou finished, Xiao Yen entered. Though she was shorter than three-month-old bamboo, she still had to bow her head to step under the false doorway. Everyone was made to bow this way to render them more humble, possibly so they wouldn't ask Jing Long for impossible things on his birthday.
Behind the wall it was quieter. Xiao Yen put her flowers on the table heaped with offerings, then knelt on the red cushions in front of the well. She bowed three times, and asked blessings for Wang Tie-Tie, for Fu Be Be, for Gan Ou and her two sons. She also asked blessings for Master Wei, and her classmates, Fat Fang and Long Yen.
She sat back on her heels. Arrows of sunlight pierced the roof, brightening the false temple. Dust swirled in lazy circles, rising up the lines of light. Tiers and tiers of candles stood on the narrow shelves covering every wall. Still, Xiao Yen saw shadows curling around the foot of the well out of the corner of her eye. They disappeared when she looked at them directly.
Xiao Yen felt the same now as she had when she'd tested her luck, so long ago, on the riverbank. Maybe the dragon wouldn't choose for her. Maybe she'd have to wait for Wang Tie-Tie or Fu Be Be to make the important decisions, to choose her life for her.
Xiao Yen rose up on her knees to look over the lip of the well. The light from the candles wasn't strong enough to pierce the darkness there. She had to do something, say something, even if there was no dragon living at the bottom of the well. A musky, mossy scent overpowered the perfumed flowers as she took a deep breath. She held it for a moment, then let it out in a rush with her words: “Honorable dragon, protector of this town, please forgive me. I . . .”
Something gold flashed. Xiao Yen's words froze on her lips. A dark hole ripped through the warm, still air, swallowing her last chance for happiness. Xiao Yen couldn't hear the clink of the metal on stone as it tumbled down, nor the splash at the bottom, if there was any.
The dragon had chosen for her, but not in a way she'd imagined. He'd taken her amulet, the manifestation of her luck. Reaching up to her now naked neck, she finished her apology, her tears chasing the words down the well.