Am I overreacting? Probably. Should I be this angry? Most likely not. But I’m hurt that he didn’t think he could come to me and discuss this. The truth is, I’m one hundred percent positive I would’ve balked at his idea at first. However, after his explanation, it makes perfect sense. I know in my heart I would’ve agreed to this. I would’ve been happy, and more than anything, grateful.
Now? Not so much. I’m left with the burn of a cover-up and the sting of his inability to trust me.
As expected, there’s a knock on my door.
“Go away.”
“It’s Jeb. Let me in.”
Jeb won’t go away. He’d probably sleep in the hall. I crack the door just a bit and ask him what he wants.
“Let me explain.”
“I’ve heard enough for one night.”
“Come on, Spesh.”
I walk away, allowing him to enter on his own.
“Give the guy a chance. He’s gone way above and beyond for you. You don’t even know the half of it.”
“Harrumph.”
“Listen to me, dammit.”
“No, you listen to me. I’m not ten. I’m twenty-six and have been through more crap than most people have at my age. For him to keep this from me makes me feel like shit. I don’t like it. One bit.”
Jeb holds his hands out, saying, “Calm it down, sugar. You don’t know how hard he’s worked is all I’m saying. If this were any other bar being remodeled, it wouldn’t have reopened until Valentine’s Day. He had crews in here nonstop.”
“Like he’s not benefitting from that?” I ask.
“He doesn’t need the money. You know damn well that’s true,” Jeb says.
Jeb does have a point.
“Don’t forget, he has another job to maintain too,” Jeb adds.
“Not anymore.”
“What?” Surprise tinges Jeb’s voice.
“He had a falling out with his father and left the firm.” Maybe I should’ve kept my mouth shut about that piece of information, but Jeb is a vault when it comes to things like this. He’d never utter a word. “Don’t say anything, though.”
“Do you think him spending all this time over here had anything to do with that?”
I never thought about it, but at the time I didn’t know about this. “He and his dad have never seen eye to eye.”
“That’s too bad.”
“You wouldn’t say that if you met his dad. Major asshole.”
Jeb’s brow is furrowed. “Hmm. That’s a shame. Weston’s such a great guy.”
“Yeah, he is.”
A grin splits on Jeb’s face. His index finger jabs me. “See, I knew you’d come around.”
“That doesn’t mean I’m not pissed off at him. Or hurt.”
“But you still like him.”
“Shut up.” I shove him. “When are you getting that brace off your arm?”
“I get to stop wearing it tomorrow hopefully. I have an appointment. At least I don’t have the cast anymore. That sucked.”
“Good, now get out of here, please. Aren’t you supposed to be working?”
He laughs. “Yeah, but my boss is a jerk and I had to calm her down.”
I flip him the middle finger.
He leaves, and as I assumed, Weston knocks next.
“It’s open.”
“Hey,” he says.
“Hey. I don’t want to talk about this tonight. I have to figure this out in my head.”
“But you will talk to me, right?”
“Yes. But tell me something. The stuff that happened between you and your dad. Did it have anything to do with you buying this building?”
His lips press into a thin line and he doesn’t answer. Only I’m pretty sure he just did.
37
Weston
Special says, “So I guess I’m to blame then.”
“No! That’s not true by a long shot. The answer isn’t that simple, though.”
“Then tell me.”
She knows everything, but I repeat the story, condensing it. “We got into it one day after I’d been here checking on things. He accused me of working on Habitat during office hours. I denied it, of course. My time here was limited to lunch hours and after work. I didn’t hide the fact that I took this project on. Then one day that engineer approached me about all the employees leaving. I went to the chairman, and you know the rest. Honestly, this may have given me the impetus to leave, but it in no way was the absolute cause of it.”
Her eyes laser into mine, searching for the truth. It’s there, plain as day, because I’ve never lied to her and won’t.
“That’s the truth of how it happened. And I’m glad it did. If I hadn’t bought this place, I think I would’ve stayed there, trapped and miserable, with no hope of ever getting out.”
“I believe you.”
My chest suddenly is a thousand pounds lighter. Pulling her into my arms, I say, “I’m sorry. I’ll never do anything like this again.”
“I know you won’t. I trust you.”
“It has occurred to me over the last few days that there’s something I need to say to you … something I’ve never thought I’d say to anyone.”
Her warm, dark chocolate eyes gaze up at my own and heat spreads into me, deep into my soul.
“Almost from the beginning you’ve managed to mend every fractured piece of me. I was never that guy who was always happy, the one who had the world in the palm of his hand. It was probably because I’ve always carried around a shitload of misery from the time I can remember. Heartache doesn’t only affect the heart—it affects every damn bone in your body. Each day I spend with you, those razor sharp emotions, the ones that rip you open and leave you bleeding, keep disappearing, one by one. And now I’m finding they don’t exist anymore. I used to think I’d do anything to get my parents to love me or pay some kind of attention to me. Then a funny thing happened. I don’t give a damn about them any longer. Only you, because you’re the one who made all the shit go away. Now, instead of feeling the usual pain, I’m filled with warmth and sunshine. Sparks and energy. What I’m trying to say is, I love you, Special. I’m obsessed with you. Every fucking piece of you.”
Her bottom lip quivers, and no, hell no, she is not going to cry. I crush those perfect lips in a searing kiss that hopefully takes her mind off any tears. When she moans in my mouth, I know I’ve succeeded. Except I’ve also gotten my dick hard as stone. The fucker is impatient too. I don’t have to worry though because her hand unzips and tugs the bastard free.
In the meantime, I’m working on getting her out of her clothes. We’re half undressed, enough to accomplish the dirty deed, so I pick her up, test the waters to make sure she’s ready, and slide her down the length of my rock-hard cock. Putting her back against the wall to use as leverage, I go at it like a crazy fool. You’d think I was a damn rabbit, the way I’m thrusting in and out.
After we both climax, Special touches my lips and says, “I love you too. Although, it was definitely lust, not love at first sight. You were a demanding ass.”
“Yeah, I was.”
“So, why did you get so shitfaced that night?”
Thinking back makes my dick shrink up faster than throwing a bucket of ice on it. Special notices. “That bad, huh?”
Walking to the couch still holding her, I sit down with her on my lap. “It was a family dinner with the Pickfords.”
“Who are they?”
I scoff. “My mother’s family. Caroline Pickford Wyndham. I guess you didn’t know that. If you can believe it, they are snobbier than the Wyndhams and have even more money.”
“More money?”
“Dad married well.”
“What kind of money are you talking about? I’m not being nosey. I’m just clueless here.”
“Hundreds and hundreds of millions.”
“No wonder you took dancing lessons.” She winks at me. This is what I love about her. The dollar signs that go with my name don’t matter at all to
her.
“Etiquette classes.”
She pats my cheek, saying, “Whatever.”
“That night I got it from every angle imaginable. Mom’s sister started in on my hair. Then her husband joined in, knocking the tat peeking out at the very bottom of my neck.” I point to the one. “It was one thing after another. The entire night was bash Weston. They even found fault with my work at the firm, and they know nothing about what I do. Dad started in on Habitat, and it got even worse. I stopped listening and started drinking. Heavily.”
Then I reflected on what Harrison’s father once told me. “It had been an especially rough day. I’d received a harsh letter from Dad telling me an A minus wasn’t going to help me get into college. It didn’t matter all my other grades were either A’s or A pluses. He never said anything positive about those. He only pointed out the one lowest grade. My anger shot off the grid. Later that day, I saw some kid picking a fight with another kid. The one who was getting beaten up was a puny thing and didn’t stand a chance. So I stepped in and took my anger out on the bully. I was the one who got caught and in trouble. I tried to lie my way out of it by saying I wasn’t involved, but it didn’t work. It was stupid because I was defending that little kid and should’ve told the truth.
“Afterward, I had a long talk about anger management with Harrison’s dad. He knew I’d gotten into trouble and asked me what happened. So I told him. His advice was to always be honest, and if I was going to be a star, be the brightest one in the sky. He said taking the high road wasn’t much harder than the road next to it, but it would certainly lead to better places. So that night at dinner with my mother’s family, I shut my mouth and took the high road. Afterward, I stumbled into A Special Place. I believe a higher power led me to you.”
She smiles during the story. “I’m glad I never met the Pickfords. They seem like nasty people.”
“They’re the worst. Did you know when I graduated at the top of my class from college, my parents never attended the graduation ceremony? It’s normally six years, but I fast-tracked and did it in five.”
“No one came to see you get your diploma?” She covers her mouth and her eyes pool with unshed tears.
I grab her hand and say, “Nope. But by then, I was used to it. I interned at the company during high school too. I hated coming home, but I loved what I did. I was a top-notch employee for my father. So when they started knocking my work, it was damn hard to keep my mouth shut.”
“I’m so sorry you had to go through that.”
“Don’t be. It’s over, and now I know what kindness, compassion, and thoughtfulness feel like.”
“I do care about you so very much. And like you, I never thought, well, I assumed I’d be alone, at least until Cody went off to college.”
That idea baffles me. I understand she works hard and time is a factor, but… “Why would you cut yourself off like that? I get that you’re stretched for time.”
Abruptly, she stands and asks, “Would you care for a drink? I’m going to change.”
“I’ll get the drink while you change.”
She comes back wearing those stretchy pants she loves and an oversized sweatshirt, hugging a large manila envelope to her chest.
“Here.” I hand her a glass of chardonnay and she thanks me. “Whatcha got there?”
After taking a large gulp, she sets her glass down and chews on her nail. Her eyes are fastened on mine. She’s anxious and super edgy about something.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
Her arm still hugs the envelope, so I ask, “Does it have something to do with what you’re holding there?”
In the most solemn, unwavering tone I’ve ever heard come out of her, she says, “Weston, I trust you. I do. But you have to swear to me before God above you will never disclose what I’m about to share with you to anyone. That means your closest friends. Can you do that?”
“Jesus. What is this?”
“If you don’t swear this oath, I can’t tell you.”
“I swear. If it’s that important, I won’t ever tell a soul. I promise.” Whatever’s in that fucking envelope must be scary as shit, and I’m not quite sure I want to know. But this is Special, and I’d walk over broken glass for her.
She takes care when she opens the thing and slides something out. When she hands it to me, I smile. It’s a birth certificate. At first I think it’s hers. But when I look at the name, I get confused. Michael Connor Berenson.
“Who is this?”
“Cody. It’s his birth name.”
“I don’t understand.”
Then she hands me a legal document, which are custody papers. It names Special O’Malley as legal custodial guardian of one Michael Connor Berenson and on it are Special’s and Sasha’s signatures. It’s all above board. I’ve seen enough legal documents in my day to know and understand this much.
Then she hands me another legal document showing her as the adoptive parent of Michael Connor Berenson, now known as Michael Cody O’Malley. This is where I get super confused. If Sasha died, why would Special change Cody’s name?
She knows what’s going on in my mind. “I had to, and you’ll see why after you read the letter.”
Taking the documents back from me, she forms a tidy stack on the coffee table.
“So there’s another reason why Cody is out on the farm with Mimi. It’s a safety factor. Three years ago when I got the call from Sasha, I figured she was drugged out. And she was, from what I gathered. She’d gotten messed up with the wrong people. A while before that, she’d told me if something went wrong, or if I didn’t hear from her in a while, I was to call this number she gave me. So I did and a woman answered. I went to her apartment and there was Cody, along with those custody papers and this letter.”
Her hand trembles when she pulls out the letter.
“Special, this can wait.”
“No, we’ve come this far. It’s time you know the rest of the story.”
The pages are slightly worn, and there are places where the ink has been blurred by water droplets, or perhaps tears. Raising my head, I see Special’s eyes aren’t exactly dry.
“I’m sorry this upsets you.”
She blinks long and slow, so I go ahead and read.
Spesh,
Assume I am dead if this letter is in your hands. I did something so stupid, I hate to tell you. But the fact is, you have to know so you can get Connor out of here. He’s not safe. I have prearranged for you to take legal custody of him. There will be no court battle because I never named his father on the birth certificate. Beware, his father is an extremely dangerous man, and if he learns of Connor, he will stop at nothing to get him. Connor thinks he’s dead. That’s the story I told him. It was safer that way.
Now for me. You always knew coming to L.A. wasn’t a good idea. I should’ve listened to you and Mimi. I was using too much and thought hooking up with the dealer was smart, but then I leveled up and hooked up with the dealer’s supplier—the big man. He didn’t like it too much when he noticed I was dipping into his stash. There was so much of it I didn’t think I’d get caught. I’d always stayed one step ahead, and being the boss’ girl, I figured it was okay. It wasn’t. The boss was more pissed than you can imagine.
My only concern now is Conner. You need to take him home. Far away from here. Raise him with love, like I know you will. But keep him safe. If they ever suspect he’s Rodrigo’s, YOU won’t survive, and I’m not sure Connor will either. Take every precaution you can think of. Always, Spesh, and I mean always watch your back. Change his name and legally adopt him. I call him Cody Bear—I sort of copied Mimi’s name for you.
I’ve missed you like crazy, and I know you’ll be the best mom in the world, much better than I ever was.
Love you forever,
Sash
I’m stunned.
“If you didn’t know about him, how did you sign these?” I ask.
“I didn’t, but I’d never admit it. That’s why I shot
you that day. I thought you had come for Cody.”
“Christ. You’ve been fearing for you life and Cody’s all this time.”
“Mimi and Jeb seem to think we’re safe, since all these years have passed and nothing.”
“Jeb knows?”
“Yeah,” she says.
“You trust him?”
She chuckles. “I do. He’s like a dad to me.”
“I got that feeling from him. He watches over you like a hawk.”
“Jeb’s the one that suggested the alarm system on the driveway.”
I scratch my head. “Yeah, that day was nuts. I was wondering why you shoved me in the closet after you shot me.”
She moves closer and says, “It took me forever to get over the guilt of firing the gun at you.”
I take her hands in mine. “I promise if Mimi and Cody move to the apartment, I will put the latest in security up there.”
“Every time I think of Sasha, I wonder what in the hell was she thinking.”
“Hey, Special, she was an addict. Addicts don’t think like we do. They’re sick and all they know is they need to soothe the ache to feel better. That’s what their drugs do. She tried to make herself feel better in the only way she knew how.”
She squeezes her eyes shut and grimaces. The pain of Sasha’s death will never go away for her. Cody is a daily reminder of it, and the absence of Sasha is a jagged wound that will never heal.
“This is hard, I know, but you have Cody and are doing such a great job with him. Think of where he would be without you.”
Grabbing my hand, she laces our fingers together. “Every time I think about it, I blame Sasha’s parents.”
“Yeah, I can see why. But that doesn’t solve anything. It won’t bring her back. Let it go and focus on loving your son.” I pull her across my lap and hold her. The closeness seems to calm her, and we sit for a time.
“Thank you. I’ve never told anyone this other than Mimi and Jeb. Not that I have a huge group of friends or anything.” She laughs a little.
“I’m your friend.”
A Special Obsession Page 27