A part of her hoped that Jackson would join her in the bed, and hold her close while she slept, as he had the night before. She hadn’t slept so well in a long time. She’d felt so safe in his arms, and so happy.
Tomorrow they’d get this whole mess sorted out. Once she’d had some sleep, she wouldn’t be so confused. She’d see that it was just the fear her stalker had fed into her these past months, which made her so distrustful now. Which made her see evil in places where it couldn’t possibly exist. Like in Jackson.
CHAPTER 9
J ackson paced the tiny living room floor, scrubbing a rough hand over weary eyes.
Too soon, it was all too soon. He never should have said anything to Jenn, but especially not now, when she was already questioning his motives and morality. She’d put him on the spot, and he’d blurted out the truth, when he should have just kept his damned mouth shut.
Stalkers often believed themselves in love with their victims. From what Jenn had told her, whoever was stalking her did indeed have an unhealthy attraction to her. She’d claimed to have received pornographic messages and pictures from the guy.
For Jackson to tell her that he loved her, when she was already feeling afraid and betrayed, no doubt sounded both insincere and suspicious. But he had no idea how to correct the situation now. He’d never professed his love for a woman before. He’d had no intention of telling Jenn how he really felt either. It had simply slipped out of him.
It was too late to take back what he’d said. He’d just need to find a way to make it right. To prove that she could trust him. That he would keep her safe, even if she chose not to welcome him back into her bed.
Mierda! He hoped it didn’t come to that. He hadn’t realized how much he’d cared until he’d held her in his arms. When he’d held her, and made love to her, it had released years of suppressed desire, like a genie from a bottle. He wasn’t sure he could let her go now, even if she refused him. Which was the last thing Jenn would want to hear right now.
If he even hinted at how fiercely he would fight to keep her in his life, he’d probably sound just as crazy as the hijo de perra who was turning her life into a nightmare.
He just needed a little more time to prove himself. In the meantime, he needed to find out who the real threat was to Jenn’s safety, and remove the guy from her life. Permanently, if necessary.
He ground his teeth in frustration. The law was different in South America. People still disappeared without a trace down here, but that wasn’t really Jackson’s style. He’d much rather see the guy rotting away in a South American prison. That would be a truly hellish fate.
As Jackson settled on plan, he went into military mode, compartmentalizing his emotions in the same way he’d survived two tours as a marine. He mentally psyched himself up for the grueling days ahead. He much preferred knowing who the enemy was. He really hated games of cat and mouse.
Jackson made a quick call to update his team, then flipped the satellite phone onto the couch and ran his hands through his hair, before dragging them down to pull at the tight muscles in his neck and shoulders.
He rolled his head from side to side, and glanced at his watch.
It was a quarter after midnight.
He looked at the closed bedroom door and thought about Jenn sleeping just on the other side. It had felt like a dagger through his gut to have her close that barrier between them, but he could understand her need for some distance right now.
She might as well be halfway across the world. He’d never betray what fragile trust might remain, by entering that room uninvited. It might be his only hope of ever holding her in his arms again.
With a heavy sigh, he flicked off the light and crashed down onto the couch, bouncing the satellite phone off onto the floor. He heard it clatter across the wood but didn’t bother fumbling around for the device in the dark. If anyone needed him, the phone would light up when they called.
CHAPTER 10
J enn jerked upright in the darkness, terrified, unsure of what had awakened her.
She sat with the thin sheet pulled up around her chest, gasping, sweating. The night was unusually hot and humid, but the sheet gave her a false sense of security that she wasn’t ready to abandon.
The room was very dark, making it hard for her to see anything but the pale square of the window on the wall. From the dim glow, she guessed that the moon was covered by clouds.
Had a nightmare awakened her?
She strained her ears for any suspicious sounds, but the night was filled by strange noises. Endless trills, whistles, chirps, and cries from the hordes of unseen insects and creatures which lived in the rainforest.
For a city girl, all of the sounds were alien and frightening.
Was it her imagination getting the best of her, or was that a strangely shaped shadow standing in the corner?
Jenn shivered and pulled the sheet up closer to her chin.
She hated feeling afraid. She’d always been such confident woman, so sure of herself. She had never believed in monsters, not even as a child. Then Roger had come along and taught her how wrong she was.
Monsters did exist, but they masqueraded as human beings. Roger had proven that evil might lurk beneath even the prettiest of faces.
When she’d finally managed to rid her life of the devil she’d once desired, then her stalker had appeared, adding insult to injury.
She’d never had a chance to recover, to heal, to find her courage.
The stalker’s presence was a slow working acid, destroying what was left of her life. Now it eroded the feelings she’d had for Jackson, leaving behind doubt and fear.
Jenn slid one hand over to touch the empty half of the mattress where Jackson had slept the night before. She’d felt so safe and happy having him beside her.
She wished she could roll back time and have him beside her again, if only for one more night.
If she called out, would he hear her?
She chewed on her lip, not wanting to give in to the fear. She came to South America to find herself. To find the strength and the courage which she’d lost during her escape from Roger. She couldn’t allow herself to use Jackson as a crutch. She needed to do this on her own.
Despite her doubts and her fears, she was surprised by how much she wanted Jackson with her. Even if he had hired someone to follow her and take pictures, she doubted he had intended to hurt or frighten her.
As a marine, if he had wanted to scare her, she was sure he would have chosen a more terrifying tactic. Maybe he hadn’t realized how disturbed his New York associate was? That would explain a lot.
If he’d known the photographer was sending her frightening messages and pictures, Jackson would have fired him. She was sure of it. But why would he lie when she asked him about the file full of pictures in his kitchen? It just didn’t make sense.
His strange profession of love was also extremely out of character.
Her thoughts drifted to Remi’s declaration regarding how much Jackson had changed during the war. Could he really have changed so much? Was Jackson a threat now? Was she in danger?
She was so confused!
Her thoughts circled around and around, as if she were trying to focus through an internal hurricane. Before Roger, she never would have struggled this much over the motives of a man.
Now she knew how violent and dangerous a man could be. Even one she thought she cared for. And she did care for Jackson, whether he was a liar or not. Dangerous or not.
Oh, who was she kidding? He was a marine, of course he was dangerous! The question was whether or not he might harm her. A question she still didn’t have an answer to.
She would never really know, until it was too late. Just like with Roger. But Jackson had the potential for much more ferocity. He was trained in violence, while Roger was simply a man with a bad temper.
Jackson was a warrior. She shivered as she considered what that meant. She’d be a fool to think he’d spent almost a decade as a warrior and n
ever killed anyone. He must have killed dozens, maybe hundreds of enemies.
What a terrible thought!
But at the same time, she’d never really felt threatened by Jackson. She must have known, even if only on a subconscious level, what Remi’s older brother was capable of. What his job consisted of. Yet she’d never felt afraid of him, until she’d found that folder filled with photographs.
Even then, she was more hurt than afraid. She’d felt betrayed, confused, but not really scared. Nothing like the terror she’d felt with Roger, who’d proven himself a threat time and again.
Jackson had a history of protecting her, at least when they’d been kids.
Jackson was always there, as a shadow standing behind Remi, protecting the girls from being bullied at school.
Jenn startled.
The key element was Remi.
Jackson hadn’t actually been there for Jenn. He’d been there to protect his sister, and that blanket of protection had extended to include Remi’s best friend. Maybe Jenn had been wrong about him all along. Maybe she’d never really been safe with him.
She had no memories of time spent with Jackson when Remi was not there to act as a buffer. Tomorrow, it might be a good idea to move back to the guest huts. She’d have to give up hot water and electricity after dark, but it might still be the best thing for her. At least until she had Jackson figured out.
A pang of regret stabbed at her heart.
She’d grown up in love with Jackson. When he’d finally welcomed her into his bed, she was over the moon with joy. She didn’t want to give that up yet.
She hadn't really believed him when he’d told her that he wanted more than one night, but she’d hoped that her future might include more of him. She’d never expected everything to implode so soon.
Clearly, she was cursed. She just couldn’t keep a relationship alive and healthy. Not even with the one man she’d always wanted. The one man she would have given anything to stay with.
Furious at the tears which filled her eyes and threatened to fall, she rolled over and tried to force herself back to sleep. She was just starting to drift off, when she felt the mattress sag beside her.
Jackson!
He’d claimed he would sleep on the couch.
Joy battled with confusion and fear in her heart.
She rolled towards him, not sure what she would say, but the choice was taken from her as he placed a damp cloth over her mouth and nose. A strange scent filled her lungs as she gasped in surprise.
She raised her hands to push the cloth away, but her body felt strangely unresponsive and weak. She feebly batted at him with half the strength she’d intended.
A whispery moan escaped her lips as her hands abruptly fell limp onto her chest, then she slipped into unconsciousness.
CHAPTER 11
J ackson couldn’t manage to fall asleep until well after three a.m., so it wasn’t a surprise that he slept late and was only awakened when Remi repeated her early morning pounding on the front door.
As his sister turned the key in the lock and burst into the room, he sat up and rubbed at his weary eyes. He hadn’t slept well. It was mostly due to what he’d learned about Jenn’s previous boyfriend, Roger.
That hijo de perra was more than just a onetime offender when it came to the battery and abuse of women. He had a record a mile long, beginning clear back in the foster homes he was shuffled through during childhood.
The guy also had close to a dozen active restraining orders taken out against him in nearly as many different states, a gritty little fact that one of Jackson’s private investigative friends had put together, after a bit of persuasion and a whiskey bribe.
It churned Jackson’s gut to think about what Jenn must have lived through during the months she’d been with the guy.
Of course, being out on the couch, knowing that she was alone in his bed, hadn’t helped him sleep either.
At least a dozen times, he’d paced to the bedroom door and had to talk himself down from opening it. He really wanted to be in there with her, to atone in some way for not protecting her from Roger, but he knew he had to wait for her to come to him.
He couldn’t force her, not with her past. Any aggression from him might drive her further away.
“Oh, snap!” Remi exclaimed, stopping just inside the door to stare at his makeshift bed on the couch. “What did you do?”
His gaze cut towards the closed bedroom door, then he shook his head.
“I didn’t do anything, she just needed some space.”
“There’s no way you’re that big of an idiot,” Remi sighed. “You should know by now, if a woman says she needs space and wants you to sleep on the couch, it’s because you seriously screwed up. So, what did you do?”
“Nothing.” Jackson growled, lurching to his feet and heading to the bathroom. He really didn’t want to have this conversation with his baby sister.
Remi sighed melodramatically, as if she’d just realized that he was a total lost cause, which he kind of agreed with.
He was cursed with impossible relationships. He’d hoped Jenn would be the one to break his unlucky streak, but she seemed all too ready to add herself to his failed list before he’d really had a chance to screw things up.
When he reopened the bathroom door a moment later, Remi was still standing in the bedroom doorway. She had her hands on her hips, as if posed to scold Jenn, but there was a blank look on her face.
As she heard him step out of the bathroom, Remi turned in confusion.
“Where is she?”
Jackson’s stomach clenched.
He didn’t stop to ask what his sister was talking about, he simply shoved past her and into the bedroom.
It was empty.
“Where is she, Jackson? Where is she?!”
Ignoring Remi’s increasingly panicked cries, he did a quick search of the room, which ended in front of the window. He reached out to touch the screen, which kept bugs out but allowed the cool tropical breeze to flow through.
The mesh gave way before his fingertips. Someone had carefully cut the sides and bottom, right up against the wood, turning it into a flap that was unnoticeable unless you pushed against it.
His skin felt too tight. His gut was clenched so hard he felt like he would puke. If Jenn had wanted to leave, he knew she would have just walked out the front door.
Sure, he would have put up an objection, but that wouldn’t have stopped her.
It was more likely that her stalker had done this. The same guy who had ambushed Jackson with a chunk of wood to the side of his head. Most likely, the same guy who’d made the past year a nightmare for Jenn. Her ex-boyfriend, Roger.
It terrified him to think of what that guy might be capable of.
Rage and horror ripped through his system as he realized how badly he’d failed Jenn. He’d given her space, and in doing so, he’d given her abuser the opportunity he needed to step up his game from stalking to abduction.
Jackson should have been more careful. He should have insisted the door stay open, at the very least. Hell, he should have been sleeping beside her! He would have gutted that sneaky fucker before the guy had laid one finger on Jenn.
But there was no use berating himself over what should have been done. Jenn was gone and he needed to find her, quickly.
From what she’d told Jackson about the dirty texts and photographs, Roger still had a need to sexually possess her. She’d probably be safe until the bastard could move her somewhere more private.
Once Roger was alone with her, the guy would no doubt try to act out some of his fantasies.
If she put up a big enough fight, her abductor would probably feel as if he had only two choices. He’d either feel driven to kill her, or he’d let her go.
Statistically, sexual predators would much rather let their victims go than fight with them. But after being ambushed himself, and reading about Roger’s violent temper, Jackson feared this might be one of those rare cases when the v
ictim would have ended up in a body bag.
Would have – because Jackson was going to tear the rainforest apart before that happened. He was going to find Jenn and bring her back, and he was going to rip the shriveled balls off the man who had taken her.
As he turned away from the window, he caught sight of something partially hidden beneath the edge of the bed.
Crouching, he reached for it, then straightened and stared down at his open palm with fear and revulsion
The kidnapper must have accidently dropped the cloth-wrapped syringe and not noticed that they had rolled beneath the bed. Either that, or the bastard didn’t care if anyone discovered how he’d drugged Jenn before removing her from the room.
Jackson’s skin was hot and tight, with murderous rage, but above that, was fear, despair, and self-directed loathing.
He forced himself to ease the muscles that had tied themselves into knots down his spine and across his broad shoulders.
He was going to kill the son of a bitch that had done this, but first he needed to find Jenn and make sure that she was safe.
He couldn’t allow himself to imagine that Jenn might already be dead, because he’d lose what was left of his mind.
A drizzling rain began to fall outside and cold rage cut off his breath. The rain would make it harder to track his prey. It felt like the entire world, even nature, was against him right now.
CHAPTER 12
J enn woke up slowly, fighting against a strange mental fog. She was somewhere very dark, wet, and smelled moldy. Her stomach lurched and she struggled to keep from throwing up. Her entire body felt sick and sore, as if she had been beaten all over and then given a bad case of food poisoning.
She couldn’t see anything, so she felt around, trying to figure out where she was.
There were walls on her left, walls on her right. Wooden walls? Also, wood underneath her.
She was so confused, her head felt thick and foggy. The best she could compare it to was when she had surgery on a broken arm as a teenager, she’d felt foggy when she was waking up from the anesthesia.
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