by Dani René
I feel the buzz—that lightheadedness that comes from being choked. I want to welcome it. To allow it just to take me away from this life, from this man who’s hurt me beyond anything I’ve ever felt. But I’ve finally felt happiness and I don’t want to let that go. I can’t.
My breathing is shallow and my eyes shut in resignation as I stop clawing at the hand stealing my life.
At least Heath knew.
I was strong enough to tell him.
He knows I love him.
Suddenly, my lungs swallow air quickly and painfully. Ronan’s hand is gone and my eyes flutter open to find him and Heath glaring at each other. “Ronan?” The way he says my ex fiancé’s name sends a shiver of awareness through me. There’s familiarity in both their eyes and something inside me shifts.
Paranoia. Something’s wrong. So terribly fucking wrong.
And then it happens.
My world fucked from right under me when Ronan sneers two words.
“Hello, brother.”
Once, long ago, my world was shattered. It was ripped from me and I had no way of knowing if I’d ever get it back. Today is the second time I’ve had everything taken away. When I turn to face Leah the look in her eyes tells me all I need to know. She’s shocked, there’s a crack in her sunlight and I know this is all my brother’s fault. He’s the fucking dick who’s been hurting her.
My blood boils with emotion I can’t stop and I grip his neck pinning him against the wall with one hand. “Leah, I need you to get out of here right now,” I hiss, my eyes not leaving the vermin that I call family. I feel her leave the room, her sweet intoxicating scent lingers and it fuels me.
“What are you going to do, brother? Kill me? Like you killed Callie?” The sneer that curls his lip has me tightening my grip, and I’m tempted, so fucking tempted to do it. To watch the life fade from his eyes. But I won’t give him that satisfaction. I love Leah and I’m not about to go down for this piece of shit.
“I’m no brother of yours.” I spit the words. “You will get in that fancy car and you’re going to drive away and not look back.” He pushes me off him and I let him. He’s turned into a sniveling asshole in the time I was gone. I know there’s more to the story. About why and how he knows Twig. How he seemed to be a part of her life and I have a feeling he’s going to tell me.
“That little whore of yours is the reason for all this shit. You know that? I was going to get that goddamn promotion but her father needed to marry her off. And I fucking agreed to marry the frigid bitch. Until she ran…fucking packed her bags and left me!” He’s shouting now, and I can only imagine what Leah can hear.
“If you so much as utter a word against her again, make no doubt about it, Ronan, I will break your fucking kneecaps. No, killing you will be too easy, I want you to sit in filth and wallow in the pitiful life you’re leading.” My gaze rakes in the man who was the hero in my story. And as I look at him something in my mind clicks. I pin him with a deadly glare and ask the question I don’t want an answer to. “Did you…did you hurt Callie?”
My brother’s eyes meet mine and I know. It’s written plain as day in his eyes. Those eyes that match mine. The blood that runs through his veins is the same that runs through mine. How can we be more different? How is it that all I ever wanted, and still want, is love, happiness, and a family. And him? All he wants his money. Pain etches itself into my heart. I’ve lost all these years because of the only person I trusted.
“She didn’t want me, so I made sure you couldn’t have her either. I made her pay for telling me what a nasty piece of work I was. Her sweet blood was so pretty as I watched the life drain from her.” His words slice through my heart more than I can handle and I rear back and punch him, again and again. It’s only when I feel Boone’s hands on me that the haze of anger dissipates and I see clearly. I see the bloody mess that’s now my brother’s face. Before I walk away, I leave him with one final warning. “Don’t you ever come near me or Leah again, do you hear me? Never. Even when I’m on my fucking deathbed, I will never forgive you.” I release my hold on him and he crumples to the floor.
My gaze falls on Boone, and he nods. “Now go take care of your girl.”
Leaving the room, I feel a sense of closure. It’s not perfect, it will never be, but I’ll make it through. As long as Leah hasn’t been scared off by my outburst and the truth that the man who was hurting her for so long is my own flesh and blood.
Heading down the hallway, I hear muffled voices. Pushing open the door to Leah’s room, I find her in Maggie’s arms. Her face is streaked with tears, and I feel my heart crack just a little. That searing pain that I felt seeing Callie in a pool of blood comes rushing in, but this time, it’s ten times worse because I know with confidence that this woman is embedded not only in my heart, but in my soul.
“Twig, baby?” It’s not a question, but I want her to look at me, to tell me we’re going to be okay. She drags her gaze slow and steady up my legs and chest. When she finally reaches my eyes I see the distrust and it knocks me back. It’s like a punch to the gut. There’s so many emotions burning in her stare—anger, fear, confusion—and I know I’m going to have to wait it out. Until she can get over what just happened, I’ll need to give her space.
“She needs time, Heath. Why don’t you go down and wait for the sheriff? He’s on his way.” I nod, but before I turn to leave, I take her in one more time. She’s small, fragile, and the need to protect her overwhelms me and I realize I’m staking my claim. She’s mine.
I don’t respond, I just turn to leave. My head drops as I make my way downstairs and into the kitchen. The white patrol car of our local sheriff pulls up outside and I watch him exit the car and stroll over to the front door. “Howdy, folks.” He’s a middle-aged man, with greying hair and kind eyes.
“Sheriff.” I hold out a hand, which he shakes with a friendly smile. “We had a bit of a tussle upstairs. A man made his way in here to threaten Leah.” I tell him and we make our way upstairs to find my brother now passed out.
“And you decided to exact justice?” He chuckles as he drags his gaze to me.
“He hurt her.” The words come out harsher than I expect, but when I look at the man, he’s smiling and nodding. There’s nothing angry in his gaze and I realize he thinks it’s funny that I punched Ronan.
“I’ll take him in. No need to worry, son. I’ll get this filth out of our town.” Boone helps him lift my brother and they take him out of my room. There’s blood splattered all over the wall. The memory of breaking Ronan’s nose replays in my head.
All those times Leah told me about her fiancé who kept abusing her, mentally and emotionally, I didn’t once ask her about him. Or need more details. I knew that if she had told me about him, I would have made my way there as soon as I walked out of prison and killed the fucker. And this time, if I had been arrested, at least it would have been for a good reason.
Lifting the bale of hay, I head out to the horses and drop it on the grass. It’s turned into a scorcher today. I’ve been at it since five this morning. Since Ronan was arrested yesterday, Leah has been jittery around me. She won’t spend time alone with me and it’s killing me. My heart aches, my soul cries out for her and even though I feel like a pussy for thinking that way, I can’t help it.
The woman is mine, if only she can accept that I’m not going to hurt her.
I know she’s angry and she needs time but it’s driving me insane. All I want is to pull her into my arms. “I’ve brought out something to drink.” I spin around to see Leah standing there in a yellow sundress that reaches her mid-thigh. Her white ballet flats make her look shorter and my jeans are suddenly getting tighter.
“Twig.”
“Don’t. I’ve just brought you something to drink.” Her eyes harden and I shake my head resigning to her just not giving me an inch. I stroll over, grab the mug, lifting it to my mouth, I take a long swig. The ice water is heaven sent, just like she is.
Nodding, I fini
sh my drink and place it back on the tray. “Thank you.” Her eyes settle on mine and I hope that with those two words I am conveying the emotion I feel for her. Everything this girl has brought into my life has been good. The thought of her walking out and leaving me, or just never wanting me, is slowly killing me. Every day without her in my arms is another day I feel the pain in my chest from losing the only thing that ever made me whole.
Love slips away with every step she takes away from me. She doesn’t respond, just turns and leaves and I’m left alone with sweat dripping down my body with an innate need to punch something. As the door swings shut, I spin on my heel and kick the hay so hard, both horses lift their heads to look my way. “She’s fucking gone,” I growl at them. I’m so fucked up, I’m talking to them like they understand, like they can make it okay.
My sunshine is gone and all that’s left is the dark storm clouds hovering. Deep in my gut, I feel a storm coming and I’m afraid of being caught in the eye of it. Our road has never been easy—it’s been an uphill fucking climb and now, it’s all gone to shit. As much as I feel like running up that hill, I’m slipping with each step I take.
“Barnes.” I pivot to face my boss. Boone and Maggie have been incredibly supportive of everything that’s happened. “Can we talk?” His tone is deathly serious and my heart kicks in my chest painfully. I need this job. Fuck. I hope he doesn’t fire me.
“Sure. What’s up?”
He settles on the wooden beam of the corral and watches me for a moment before he starts. “There’ve been a lot of people through my ranch, and many of them have been in some kind of trouble before. It’s no stranger to me or Mags. For some reason, my wife thinks you’re a good man. I hope you’re not going to pack up and leave, since Maggie and I would like you two to stay and hopefully work things out.” He clears his throat, which gives me a moment to collect my thoughts.
“Boone, look—”
“I’m not finished.” He meets my gaze. “I want you to take care of the place for a couple of months. Maggie…she’s…fuck.” He pushes up and stalks toward me. “Mags needs treatment, and I need to take her into the city. The doctors here can’t help her. I want someone here who I can trust.” His words slowly sink into my fear and I realize what he means.
“You what? I mean…”
“Look Barnes, you’ve been here what? Three months now?” I nod. “You know how everything works and my wife is adamant that you be the one to take care of the place. She’s also under the impression you and the little Twig are going to make up and have lots of babies.” He chuckles and so do I. I’d love that, having kids with her. Marrying her.
“I don’t know what to say.”
He regards me for a long while and places a hand on my shoulder.
“All you got to do is promise me you’ll take care of my ranch and the beautiful woman in there that seems to love you.” Somehow, I don’t think Leah loves me anymore. But I don’t tell him that. I just nod my agreement. “Good, we leave on Saturday.” That’s two days away.
“I’ll make you proud.” A swift nod and he leaves me with my work. Moment’s later my mind is still on the new responsibility on my shoulders when a small red sports car pulls up and I can’t help the groan that rumbles in my chest.
“Hey cowboy, I’m here for my lesson.” Amber’s mother—whose name I later learned is Mindy Castle, one of the town’s socialites—gets out of the car. Her voice is like nails on a chalkboard and the fact that she’s dressed in the tightest jeans I’ve ever seen doesn’t faze me one bit. Her tits are just about falling out of her top as she walks over to me.
“It’s Heath,” I grunt as I pull the swing gate open, allowing her entrance. This is going to be a long fucking day.
“If you wash that plate any more I doubt there’ll be any ceramic left on it.” The plate clatters into the sink causing me to jump. I turn to face Mags. She’s got her suitcase beside her, and I can’t help but feel sad that they’ll be gone for so long. I’ve come to care for her.
“I just got distracted.” I pull the tea towel from the hook and dry my hands. “How are you feeling?” She nods, but I can see there’s pain etched all over her face.
“I’ll be all right, dear. How are you? Have you spoken to him?” She glances out the window and I can hear the cackle from that woman who seems to think Heath is the ride she’s here for. “I see. Jealousy is healthy in small doses.”
“I’m not jealous,” I respond, crossing my arms over my chest. Maggie looks at me as if I’ve grown an extra head. The lie is obvious—I am jealous—but I can’t be with him so there’s no point in even getting myself angry. He’s a grown man and if that’s the type of woman he wants, then so be it.
“Darling, come here.” I watch a woman who’s shown me nothing but love, struggle into a chair and when I join her, she reaches for my hand. The love emanating from her slowly seeps into me and I feel every bit of it as she intends. “That man out there loves you. I can see it when he looks at you. There were secrets between the two of you, but that’s expected. Don’t walk away from something true because you can’t find it in your heart to forgive. Are there things that you’ve not told him over the years?” I nod. Yes, so many things. “And I’m sure there’s only one thing he cares to hear from you. Three words. Those are the most powerful. Trust me when I tell you that nothing in this life comes easy. You two have used words all your lives, through your relationship, but this time, Leah, darling, you need to love beyond words.”
She gives my hand a squeeze as Boone joins us. “Come on Mags, we need to hit the road if we’re going to make it to the hotel before nightfall.” I watch as he helps his wife and the love he touches her with. There’s something incredibly beautiful about how two people can spend their whole lives together and still have such a deep connection. When my gaze flits outside again, I see him with another woman and the pain in my heart is too much to bear.
I rise up and walk out with Maggie, helping her into the car. She cups my face in her hands and pulls me in for a kiss on the cheek. Before she releases me, she whispers. “Love beyond words, Leah.” And then they’re gone. I turn to head back inside. I know Heath will be hungry after a day outdoors, so I pull out lamb to make a roast for dinner.
My mind is still reeling from learning that Ronan and Heath are brothers. I’ve spent the day away from Heath to get my mind around it. Learning that the man you ran away from is the brother of the man you love is a bit of a mind fuck, but as I sit here, I realize that most of my adult life I’ve been ruled by Ronan and I don’t want him to have that power over me anymore.
I want my own happy ending. Fuck, I deserve my own happy ending. I glance at the clock from the desk where I’ve spent the afternoon writing and realize that it’s already six. Pushing up, I make my way into the kitchen and glance outside. The small red sports car is still here and my anger gets the better of me. I head outside and make my way to the stables.
How can she still be here?
I’m about to round the corner when I hear her.
“Come on, cowboy. Just feel it.” There’s shuffling, but I don’t hear Heath. I peek around the corner to see her practically climbing him like a fucking tree. His hands are on her hips, gripping her as she twines her arms around his neck. “I know you do. You want this.” She continues her whisper, but I can hear every fucking word.
Suddenly, they become blurry and I realize I’m crying. The jealousy is bitter in my mouth and she leans in to place her lips on his. That’s when I let out a gasp and run for the house. But I can’t be inside right now. I can’t be near him, so I run for the river. It’s not too dark yet, so I make my way down to a clump of trees and sit on the boulder.
I don’t hear anything behind me. He wouldn’t come after me. He’s already moved on to something better. I can’t believe I was so stupid. So fucking stupid to think he’d want me. I close my eyes and remember the way he kissed me, touched me, made love to me. Every moment he was beside me felt so real. Ever
y word he said heartfelt. So how can he just move on to someone else?
I’ve never felt true heartache. Yes, there are times I’ve been sad, or cried over something, but the stinging pain of heartbreak is enough to have me gasping for breath. Seeing someone you love so unconditionally with someone else is something I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.
I know Maggie said I have to give him a chance, but for him to go around kissing someone else, that’s more than I can handle. When I’m with someone, I need them to be mine and mine alone.
Swiping my hand over my cheek, I watch the water rush over the rocks. It’s getting darker now and I need to get back. “You’re difficult to catch, Sunshine.” His voice is filled with amusement, but there’s nothing funny about what he just did.
Anger flares inside me, burning me alive. I jump down off the boulder and turn toward him. My glare pinning him in place. “Fuck you, Heath.”
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Confusion is written all over his face as he steps toward me.
“Don’t.” I lift my hand and thankfully, he stops. I can’t be near him when I speak the words I need to say. “I wanted to talk to you. I walked in on you and that fucking woman kissing. You want to stand there and act like you’re innocent. You know what, Heath? I believed you were innocent of the crime they accused you of, but you standing in that fucking stable with your hands on her, that was more than I could take.” I storm past him, but he’s too quick. His hand reaches for me, gripping my arm and spinning me around.
“Listen to me, Leah. She came on to me. She leaned up to kiss me and I gripped her hips and pushed her away. Did you stay long enough to see that?” His voice raises by a notch as anger and frustration flare through him. I tug my arm from his grasp and he releases me.