by Alison Ryan
But, for now, he needed some fresh air and sunshine. The sound of the Atlantic beckoned him to come out and rest a while. Declan thought jumping in and having a swim might be a good way to start the day.
He stepped out onto the back porch to take in his surroundings. He could see a woman was already laying out on the sand. She had on a black bikini and was flipping through a magazine as she lounged on a beach towel.
Not a bad view, he thought. Not a bad view at all.
Ten Years Ago
Charlotte’s least favorite shift of all the shifts she had to work at Dixie Garden was definitely Sunday brunch.
Charleston’s finest came out in their Lily Pulitzer dresses, Tory Burch flats, and Chanel handbags. The women gossiped over pimento cheese sandwiches and she-crab soup that they never touched, all while demanding constant refills of water and sweet tea.
And none of them tipped for shit.
Charlotte dreaded it every week. And on this particular Sunday, she was reminded of why.
Saylor Embers and her coven of southern bitches were seated at one of her tables. As soon as they saw she was their server, the hell began.
“Oh, well, look who it is!” Saylor cooed. “It’s little Miss Ho Bag. How’s it going? Don’t you look adorable in that little apron? It really hides your flaws well!” She smiled and the girls around her chortled at her audacity.
Charlotte ignored the insult. “Good morning. What can I get y’all to drink?”
“Water. Unlike some, we don’t drink our calories. And we prefer it bottled,” Saylor said. “Who knows what you’d do to it.”
“Got it,” Charlotte said. “I’ll bring you bottled water. Did you want an appetizer?”
Saylor rolled her eyes. “No. But I wouldn’t mind a different waitress. I prefer not be served by someone who’s fucking my boyfriend.”
Charlotte’s hands started to shake. “I’m not sleeping with him. And I’m completely capable of serving you whatever you need.”
“Are you ‘capable’? How lovely. Couldn’t a trained monkey serve us sandwiches? I mean, seriously. What are you even doing here? You realize everyone thinks you’re a joke, right? And a whore? Because when you receive something like rent in exchange for sexual favors, that’s what you become. A nasty prostitute. I don’t want you touching my food. Can I see your manager? Maybe they’re not aware what kind of girl they hired. There must be plenty of other trailer trash bitches vying for a spot at this place.”
Charlotte couldn’t take it anymore. She dropped the notepad she took orders on and quickly ran from the dining area and back to the break room. She couldn’t let them see her cry.
She wouldn’t give them the satisfaction of that.
That night she’d thought long and hard about what she was trying to prove by staying in a town that seemed to want nothing to do with her.
Charlotte missed her little sister. She missed her friends; hell, she missed having friends. The only friend she had here in Charleston was Declan.
She even missed her father. And as much as it pained her to come crawling back, she wondered if maybe it was better that way. Charleston just didn’t seem to love her the way she loved it.
That night she’d told Declan how she felt.
“So you’re thinking of moving back home?” Declan asked. “Why?”
“It would be too hard for you to understand,” Charlotte said, trying her best not to cry in front of him. “You don’t know what it’s like.”
Declan sighed. “You could at least try me. It’s kind of presumptive of you to assume I wouldn’t know what it’s like to feel a certain way.”
Charlotte rolled her eyes. “Declan. I am living in your carriage house. The fact that your family even has a carriage house automatically precludes you from being able to relate to most people outside of your social circle.”
Declan was annoyed now. “Just because my family has money doesn’t automatically disqualify me from having pain in my life, Charlotte. And the fact that you think it does shows how little you know about the world and how it works.”
Charlotte stood. “You’re so condescending sometimes!” She started to walk away.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“To bed. I’m tired. I’m so fucking tired,” she said, and then it couldn’t be helped. The tears came, like a wave that couldn’t be stopped, and she was suddenly crying, the kind of crying filled with gasps and sobs and wails. It was a cry from deep within her soul, one she’d been holding in since she was thirteen years old.
“Charlotte…” Declan went to her then, not caring what had been said or how it might look tomorrow. He reached out and pulled her into his arms, her sobs vibrating against his chest, her tears soaking into the front of his button down.
“I can’t take it anymore, Declan,” she cried. “This city hates me. I don’t look like anyone here, nor can I afford to. I don’t come from a family that’s lived here for 400 years, I don’t even own a decent car. I’m not in a sorority, I have to work at a place that serves the very girls that laugh at me on a daily basis, and I’m expected to do it all with a smile on my face.” She pulled back and wiped her tears from her beautiful eyes. “I’m tired of pretending to be happy. I’m tired of sticking it out just to prove I can.”
Declan stared at her, his heart breaking at the sound of her anguish and rage stirring in his heart thinking about anyone hurting her.
“I didn’t know,” he said. “Who would ever laugh at you?”
Charlotte sniffed. “If you must know… Saylor, your girlfriend. She’s one of the worst. She called me trailer trash. I’ve never even been inside of a trailer, and even if I had, does that automatically make me a terrible person?” Charlotte started crying again. “And my ex-roommate, Allyn. She comes into Dixie Garden all the time and ignores me completely. Acts like we didn’t live together for 9 months. Unless she’s alone, then she’ll acknowledge me half-heartedly.”
Declan was furious. “Charlotte, Saylor is not my girlfriend. I’d never want to be with someone who was such a heinous bitch. And Allyn Legare is a phony, she always has been.” Declan pulled Charlotte toward him again. “You’re beautiful, smart, and really funny. You’re original, and full of life, and sexier than any girl on the peninsula. They’re jealous as fuck, Charlotte. They know that they’re nothing special and that they probably never will be because they don’t have the courage to be anything other than what everyone expects them to be.” He took her chin in his hand and pointed her face up at him. “I’d feel sorry for them if they weren’t such assholes.”
Charlotte’s lips had never looked so good. God, he wanted to kiss her. He’d wanted to kiss her since the second he saw her, but seeing her like this made him want to even more, to show her she wasn’t any of the things she herself as.
For just a moment he wanted her to see herself through his eyes.
“You really think I’m beautiful?” Charlotte asked, her eyes wide now.
“I know it,” he said, and that’s when he took his moment. He kissed her gently, tasting her for the first time, the scent of her hair intoxicating, her breasts and body never so close to him as they were now.
She pulled back a moment and looked at him. “I’ve wanted you to tell me that... Since I met you, Declan. Is that strange to tell you?”
Declan shook his head. “I’ve wanted to say it. Since the day on the bridge. You looked… lost. Those eyes of yours, they haunted me. All I wanted to do was take the pain away. It was so clear then you were in a lot of it.”
Charlotte looked down, embarrassed. “So you pitied me?”
He smiled. “No. Well, maybe a little. I wondered why someone as beautiful as you would ever be alone on a bridge. And then I realized, you were there so I could find you.”
She looked up at him. “Like it was meant to be?”
“Yes,” he took her face in his hands again and kissed her harder this time, his mouth traveling from hers and down her neck, to her collar bone.
Her long hair brushed against his face and he felt himself growing hard being this close to her. She sighed beneath him, and through the thin cotton of her tank top her nipples were swollen and stiff. His thumbs brushed against the material, making her moan.
“Declan,” she whispered. “Is this a good idea?”
He looked at her and said nothing for a moment.
“I’m not sure,” he admitted. “But I know I want you. I know you want me too. Let’s live with that tonight and worry about the rest tomorrow.”
“I’m not someone who can buy today and pay later,” she said, pulling away. “Especially when it comes to my heart.”
He gently pulled her by the arm back towards him. “I will never make you pay for anything, Charlotte. This isn’t like that.”
He pulled the thin straps of her tank top down and gently pulled her breasts out, making her gasp. His thumbs brushed against them again, the turgid peaks of her nipples beckoning him.
“Let me,” he whispered. “I can show you how I feel about you better than I can say it. And I’ll feel the same way tomorrow morning. And I’ll show you again, if you need more convincing. Let me know what it’s like to wake up to you.”
Goosebumps covered her arms, her entire body. She was wet already; she could feel it. She’d never wanted something more in her life. Even if it was a terrible idea, she couldn’t resist what he was offering her.
“Yes,” she relented. “Please. Take me, Declan. Have me however you want me. Just don’t break my heart.”
Charlotte hadn’t thought it through. She should probably have mentioned one thing before they began.
This was her first time.
But it seemed like something that would ruin the moment, so she hadn’t said anything. She’d made a decision to just go with it- for once.
He’d pulled the boxers she slept in off as she laid back in her bed, her wild hair fanning out behind her on the pillow. His shirt was off and he towered above her in just his boxer briefs. Of course his body was perfect; rippling abs, muscled pectorals, thickly roped arms that she couldn’t wait to be pulled and directed by. She was trying not to squirm under his gaze. But he wouldn’t stop staring.
“Fuck, you’re sexy,” he said as he fell towards her onto the bed. He was above her now, supported by his arms, his hands on both sides of her shoulders. His eyes were intense and filled with lust. He’d never looked at her like this before.
“Thank you,” she said, feeling silly. “I mean. I don’t know what to say.”
“Don’t say anything,” he kissed her deeply and she could feel his hardness against her own wetness, the only thing separating them the flimsy material of his boxer briefs.
He put one of his arms under her and pulled her toward him, releasing it only to pull her tank top off over her head, leaving her naked before him.
“Wow,” he said. “Your body…”
Charlotte was all curves and smooth, tan skin. Her breasts were full and at attention and he could see the slickness on her inner thighs. She was so ready for him and he was almost bursting out of his briefs. He needed to be inside her.
His kisses were voracious, covering her neck and down to her shoulders, then back to her mouth. As he moved, his erection rubbed against her, setting her sex aflame. She stole a glance down as he changed positions and she noticed the front of his underwear was soaked through, sending a jolt of embarrassment through her, ashamed of her body for betraying her desperation so lewdly.
He slid down her body a bit, taking first one nipple, then the other, into his mouth, flicking at them with his tongue. Unbeknownst to Charlotte, he’d taken the opportunity to shed his last garment, and when he moved back up to resume kissing her mouth, there was no longer any barrier between their scalding hot bodies.
She felt it before she saw it, his cock pulsing with every heartbeat as Declan’s shaft slid against her opening, up and down, grinding as they kissed. A curious sensation overwhelmed her, an emptiness. Deep down to her core. A void that needed to be filled, more even than her lungs needed to be inflated by her ragged breaths. Her body needed to be filled by Declan, she needed to feel that throbbing not only on the outside, but on the inside as well. Charlotte’s body was desperate for Declan’s powerful cock to stretch her, explore her body, and touch places nothing ever had.
He took her face in his hands and straddled her hips, kissing her passionately. When he broke the kiss, she got her first look at what she’d been feeling, standing tall against his taut stomach. Charlotte’s eyes widened at his size, not knowing what she’d expected, but suddenly she was very nervous.
“Declan,” she said. “I have to tell you something.”
“Just relax,” he said, running the back of his hand up and down her left side, making her shiver. “You’re so perfect.”
“Well,” Charlotte said, her mouth suddenly unable to form the words she wanted to tell him. “I… I have to tell you though. So you won’t be disappointed…”
He looked at her then, his eyes soft and concerned. “What is it, baby?”
Baby. No man had ever called her that. She liked how it sounded coming from him.
“Well, I know its lame, but I’ve never done this before,” she said, her heart pounding.
Declan’s expression changed and Charlotte suddenly wanted to untell what she’d just told.
“You’re a virgin?” he asked. “You’ve never…” He let the sentence go unfinished.
Charlotte shook her head, tears suddenly falling down her cheeks. “I told you, I’m ridiculous and weird and not like anyone…”
He pressed his finger against her lips. “Charlotte. It’s okay. I’m just surprised. There’s nothing lame or ridiculous about it. I just want to know you want this and that I’m not pressuring you.”
Charlotte nodded. “I want it so bad, Declan. More than anything. I just didn’t want you to wonder why I wasn’t good at it or whatever. I don’t know what I’m doing.” She threw an arm over her eyes. God this was a nightmare. She was ruining everything.
Gently, but firmly, Declan took her wrist in his hand and pulled her arm away from her face and positioned it above her head. He moved her other hand in a similar fashion, crossing them above her head and holding them fast with one of his large hands.
He cradled her face with his other hand, staring deep into her eyes. “Charlotte. I’ll be as gentle as I can, but this is going to hurt. You understand that, right? The first time always does, I imagine.” As he spoke, she could feel the power of his erection again rubbing against her. “If it gets to be too much, tell me. If you like something, let me know. I don’t want you to be scared or uncomfortable. Okay?”
With her wrists still loosely restrained above her head, her entire body trembling with anticipation, Charlotte bit her bottom lip and nodded.
Declan replied to her nod by reaching down with his free hand to line himself up with her opening. Declan had never been one to doubt his sexual prowess, but something about Charlotte made him uncharacteristically nervous. He’d realize later that it was the fact that he truly wanted her to feel special, to make it memorable, for her to have no regrets. That for the first time in his life, he had genuine feelings about the person he was fucking. Or in this case, making love to. He wanted her to experience pleasure even more than he wanted it for himself.
He entered Charlotte slowly, finding that their combined arousal had everything so wet that he slid inside more easily than he expected to. She gasped and winced, but only for a moment. As he began to ease in deeper, he spoke in a voice just this side of a whisper. “Look into my eyes, Charlotte. I want to share this moment with you completely. Look right into my eyes.”
Her eyes were glassy, difficult to focus, but Charlotte tried. It seemed to take an eternity, but finally he’d stopped his forward motion. There was pressure, and definitely some pain, but it was a delicious kind of pressure, a sumptuous pain. I can’t believe that whole thing is inside me, Charlotte thought.
S
o far, so good, filled Declan’s mind. She hadn’t realized that he still had several inches to give her.
Declan held himself there, engulfed by her, staring into Charlotte’s eyes. Her mouth was open, a small sound escaping, a kind of whimper. He resumed his glacially-slow thrusting, easing another inch into Charlotte, then two. She began to squirm. Declan’s irresistible cock wasn’t finished yet, to Charlotte’s surprise and dismay. The pain and pressure were beginning to mount, and she wasn’t sure how much more of his length her body could physically handle.
Letting go of Charlotte’s wrists, Declan gave her a command. “Reach down and touch yourself. I want this to be so good for you.”
Charlotte had never masturbated in front of anyone else, and she couldn’t stop a fleeting thought of a mortifying moment when she’d almost been caught once by her parents years ago, but Declan was so strong, so in control of her body, that she couldn’t refuse him.
As her hands busied themselves at her clit, Declan finally stopped pushing. The pain was more extreme, the stretching so deep inside her, but the pleasure she was giving herself helped her to compensate. He stayed right there, fully impaled, and kissed her; sweet, soft kisses.
So focused was Charlotte on Declan’s mouth and her own building orgasm, she barely noticed that he’d withdrawn himself halfway and thrust back inside, more quickly. She caressed herself frantically as his rhythm became more forceful, more insistent, and before she knew it he was fairly pounding her, his thrusts no longer restrained by a fear of being too rough with her virgin body.
He felt her responding, the way her hips lifted off the bed when he pulled back, the clutching feeling of her body not wanting to release his girth. He watched her eyes carefully, and he could feel her orgasm begin as they rolled back in her head. He mashed his mouth onto hers as it happened, and he gave her his most powerful thrusts at the same time, and the combination of the kiss, the climax she’d given herself, and the weapon impaled inside her sent her to heights she’d never before reached or even imagined. Her first orgasm was merely a trigger, a catalyst for what came next, a hurricane crashing through her mind and soul, turning everything upside down inside her body and her heart, sending debris flying everywhere. The landscape of Charlotte Sanders’ life reaching, in that instant, a point by which all things would be compared and measured. Events, memories, and experiences could now all be placed into one of two categories – before Declan fucked her and after. As she came down from her trip soaring above everything in the starlit Charleston sky, she wondered, indeed, if anything would ever be the same. Was this her figurative first hit of heroin, a dragon she’d chase forever, or could Declan possibly have more to show her, more incredible things he could make her body do?