I sighed. "And we have to deal with my obvious attraction to you, and your stated attraction to me. Sexual customs and mores vary widely among the stars," I said. "On some planets, sexual intercourse is as casual as a handshake. On Ninevah, though, any touching in public, including just holding hands, is punishable by whipping for both partners.
"Haven seems to have rather strict taboos about sex, although I suspect that at least some of them are due to venereal disease and the lack of birth control." I shrugged. "I have no personal experience of those customs and mores, of course. My only sexual experience on Haven was with Gisele, as you know. But for her it was a duty, and it was completely unsatisfactory."
Jess gave me a sour smile, though her face was pink. "I heard she was supposed to be very skilled at … that."
I nodded. "She was, both skilled and enthusiastic. Or she tried to be. But her enthusiasm was faked, and for her, it was a job, not a sharing of pleasure."
"And how was Heidi?" The tone was harsh and sarcastic. I shook my head. "I have no idea. I've never had sex with Heidi." And finally, I could admit that it felt good to say that and to know it was true. I decided not to tell Heidi, though.
Jess jerked in surprise, and then her expression turned doubting. "Really? After all those nights you've shared in space?"
I nodded again. "And on-planet. Anyway," I continued, "the job has a few non-negotiable requirements. First, You'd have to resign from Messer Cass' employ; in fact you'd have to divorce yourself from Westin. I intend to work for the good of the entire planet, not any one nation.
"Second, you would have to give up flying for an undetermined length of time. Oh, you'll be flying in landers and airships, but you won't be piloting them. And I've already mentioned that you might have to go underground.
"And finally, you'll have to improve your clerical skills. I believe you told me your radio skills were good, but your typing was only 'adequate'. Exactly what does that mean?
She actually blushed. "Not much. Messer Cass just put me into an intensive typing class. When I graduated, I managed 30 words per minute. But now, I'd be lucky to break 20." she looked puzzled. "But why would you need typing ability with all your fancy thinking machines?"
I smiled. "The problem is that among the stars, everyone has a tablet comp like mine. Very little is put onto paper, or 'hard copy' as we call it, except an occasional contract or something that requires a physical signature rather than an electronic one. Startrader doesn't even have a printer aboard. Adventurer has several, but I hate to use them any more than I have to, since they belong to the people of Haven, and I don't want to wear them out. One of my biggest problems has been figuring out how to convert words on a comp screen to a stack of paper for the people of Haven. I don't anticipate needing a lot of typing; my lawyer claims he has access to professional typists."
"Your lawyer? You have a lawyer?"
I silently cursed myself. "Not all of my time away from here has been in space," I replied vaguely. "I've already begun making preparations. That's why Heidi quit; she simply doesn't have time to bodyguard me while running my errands; and she's decided that keeping me alive is more important than running around Haven making appointments."
Finally, a weak smile. "Well! At least we can agree on one thing!"
I didn't respond to her smile. "That's another thing, Jess. You've got to get over your jealousy and dislike of Heidi. You two would be working closely together, and I won't have constant friction and bickering.
"So," I concluded, "I don't want your answer now, only your assurance that you won't report this conversation to Messer Cass. Can you let me know your decision tomorrow?"
She nodded, but even her weak smile had disappeared. That last requirement was going to be hard for her, given her past jealousy. "I can promise you that, at least. About the other … well, I'll have to think about that."
"What about Jess?" were Ellie's first words when I laid out the offer.
"I don't know," I replied with a shrug. "Taking this job would be very hard for Jess. she would have to give up flying for what may be a long time. And she would have to divorce herself from Westin. And we'd both have to deal with the sexual tension. Probably the hardest thing would be having to get along with Heidi."
"Boy! 'Sexual tension! You just lay it right out there, don't you?
I frowned. "I'm sorry. Was that rude?"
Ellie grinned. "Let's just say it's not usually mentioned in polite conversation. I know what you mean, though. You didn't mention it to Jess, did you?"
"I think I called it 'sexual customs and mores'. Did I offend her? Or you?"
Ellie shook her head. "Not 'offended'. Women tend to be a lot more matter-of-fact about sex than men. Did she blush?"
I chuckled. "Only when I asked about her clerical skills."
The Ellie grin was back. "I'll bet she did. For a mechanic, she's incredibly fumble-fingered."
"And what about you, Ellie? How are your skills?"
She straightened and her head lifted. "Quite good, actually. I type 65 words per minute, and I can take shorthand. I was a Chief Secretary, you know. I ran a four-woman office."
I felt my eyebrows lift. "No, I didn't know it. Or if I had, I'd forgotten. So how did you end up working for Messer Cass?"
She shook her head. "My parents died several years ago. And then, last year, my fiancé broke off our engagement and married a younger woman. I decided I needed some excitement in my life. Do you have any idea how boring it can be to be a Chief Secretary? How bored and sick you can get of the office intrigues?" She shook her head again. "When Security came around looking for people to spy on the Star Man, I practically ran into their arms. As soon as they mentioned combat training, I knew I'd volunteer. So," she continued, "what would I have to do?"
"A lot of airship travel," I replied. "You'd have to travel all over Haven. Sometimes you could tell people you represent me, and other times you'd have to deny it. Sometimes I'll be with you, and you'll have to pretend I'm not the 'star man'.
"And even with Heidi there, you'd have to be on guard. As soon as you tell someone you represent the Star Man, you're making yourself a target for kidnap and perhaps even torture. How are you with weapons?"
She shrugged. "Not so good at the long-range sniper stuff, but I do pretty well with revolvers, and I love knives." The Ellie grin flared again. "People don't expect someone as small as me to be good at hand-to hand; but I'm quick, and I'm aggressive."
I nodded. "That would blend well with Heidi's laser. I think we could find you something more effective than a revolver."
I explained the hazards to her, as I had with Jess: that I might have to disappear, and that she might have to disappear as well, and for what could be a long time. The threat of capture and torture to reveal information she doesn't have. That she would have to resign from Security, and that I would demand loyalty to all of Haven, not just Westin.
She shook her head. "One of the reasons I joined Security was because I didn't have much of a life in Westin. And secret identities sound like fun; but maybe not for years. I'll have to think about that. As for the threat of capture, well, that's the kind of excitement I think I was looking for."
I nodded. "I don't need your answer now," I replied. " All I ask is that you don't report this conversation to Messer Cass. You can let me know your answer tomorrow. Would that be all right?"
She nodded. "Sounds good. Uh, you do realize that sex isn't part of the package?"
I smiled. "I never thought it was; after all, it never was with Heidi?"
"Really? We all assumed …"
I sobered. "I guess we'd better talk about this and get it out of the way. All of you were sent here with instructions that included sex with me, if it would help you get the information your leaders desired. I made a simple joke during our first conversation, and I think everyone assumed that after two years alone, I was some sort of raging sex maniac. Jess tells me Messer Cass didn't order her to sleep with me, but he hinted
strongly at it. Now, you're a lovely woman, But I'm not willing to approach a woman who I know would agree, but only out of a sense of duty.
I sighed. "Sexual mores vary widely among the planets. In fact, mating customs vary. On most planets, for instance, cohabitation contracts are common; those are formal contracts for mating, lasting anywhere from a few months to lifetime. The contracts usually specify with or without progeny, since birth control is both easy and common. Many planets also accept traditional marriages, which they consider life-matings with progeny. Sex without a contract is also relatively acceptable, though that varies among the planets. On a few, no-contract sex is a serious, and in a few cases a capital crime for both partners.
"It's true I have no objections to sex without a contract; I know that Haven accepts only traditional marriage, and would be scandalized by the idea of cohabitation contracts. But for me, sex must only be mutually agreed, and I hope mutually pleasurable. So don't worry, You won't be attacked by a raging sex maniac some night."
She grinned. "I'm not sure whether to be relieved or disappointed." She sobered. "Did you say birth control is easy?"
"Certainly. All female spacers use it, since casual sex aboard ship is common, though finding privacy for it is not. If you take the job, you'll be receiving one of Startrader's tablets, and you can ask Lisa about it, if you'd like."
"And I'd finally get to visit the starships?"
I was surprised. "Of course. I didn't know you wanted to visit them. Yes, you'll go aboard both Adventurer and Startrader if you get the job. Or even if you don't. I'm sorry I didn't offer it before. Anyway, you think about it, and let me know tomorrow if you're interested. I've also offered the job to Jess, so all I can say is if both of you are interested, I'll have to select one. I won't expose two more women to the risks of working for me.”
Jess was waiting for me when I arrived at my office the next morning. Her eyes were red and swollen; she had been crying. In fact her eyes were still wet. As had become common practice, she gave Heidi, sitting silent in a corner of the room, only a short nod.
"I didn't get a wink of sleep last night," she began, obviously holding herself under tight control. "All I could think about was your offer. And I can't!" Her control broke, and tears began streaming down her cheeks. "I I like you Jerd. I think I could even learn to love you. But everything I know and love is in Westin. My family, my friends, everyone I know, and everyone I love. You're new to Haven; you can take the larger view. But I was born and raised in Westin, and I was happy there. Westin is my home, and I love it.
"So I can't, Jerd. I just can't. But I promise not to report anything you told me yesterday. Is that all right? Are you … do you want me to leave?"
I smiled, though it wasn't easy. I liked Jess's tomboy energy, and I was sorry we wouldn't be getting closer. "Of course not, Jess. I wouldn't have made the offer if I wasn't happy with your work and with you. Thank you for your honesty, and I'm sorry I cost you a night's sleep."
A slow smile rose through her tears. "That's all right. I'm glad you're not mad. Uh, I know you talked to Ellie yesterday. You two would be good together."
I nodded to Heidi, and she ushered Jess out while I gently teased her about 'matchmaking'. I began thinking about Terry Havens.
If Heidi hadn't been there, Dark-haired, tanned, athletic Terry would have been the most attractive of my 'assistants'. Her hair was kept short, probably because of her active habits. She exercised at least an hour every day, and frequently badgered the others into joining her in exercise or sparring. She preferred trousers to the typical ankle-length skirts; and when Heidi introduced shipsuits to the Zone, Terry had immediately demanded a supply of her own. The shipsuits had revealed a trim, lithe body, and her movements were fluid and graceful.
Still, she didn't generate the sexual desire in me that small, cuddly Ellie did. And perversely, that was a good thing. Remembering the erotic torture that Heidi had put me through in only a couple of days, I suspected it would be best if my personal secretary didn't turn me on.
Terry was my third choice, but that actually meant little. I now realized that Jess had been an emotional choice; she really was not well qualified for the position I was offering. In retrospect, I was relieved that she had turned it down.
There had been an element of emotion in my selection of Ellie, but at least I had considered her qualifications, which were impressive. When I was listing the candidates, it was something of a toss-up between Ellie and Terry; they had similar 'take charge' personalities. But besides the emotional factor, Terry made me slightly uneasy. Of all the 'assistants', she most resembled my idea of a spy or agent: smart, athletic, and always practicing. I suspected her clerical skills would be adequate, but not spectacular.
Still, she was from the anarchic Refuge. Of all the nations, Refuge seemed least likely to have an organized intelligence agency. For that matter, it was difficult to believe that Refuge had an 'organized' anything! Nor could I see Refuge fostering fanatical loyalty in its citizens. It seemed it would be hard to establish that kind of devotion to an anarchy. So, if her clerical skills were similar, it would still be a toss-up between Ellie and Terry. I decided to wait for Ellie's answer. If she agreed, I wouldn't need to interview Terry.
Ellie knocked on my door about an hour after Jess left. "Jess has been in the rest room crying since she left your office. Did you turn her down or something?" Her expression was troubled.
I shook my head and smiled. "No. Actually, she turned me down."
She nodded, and her face smoothed. "That would do it. Home and hearth triumphant over romance. Was that it?"
I nodded. "Pretty much. But enough about Jess. What have you decided?"
Her smile flared. "I didn't have to agonize over it like Jess. If she's out, I'm in. I just didn't want to come between you if you had something going. I've got my resignation drafted. How do you want it delivered? A letter is traditional, but if it's urgent, I can do it by radio."
I nodded. "Let's do both. Radio is faster, but less private. The letter will formalize it, but we don't have time to wait for it to reach Tarrant. We have some pretty urgent business. So, I think we'd better adjourn this meeting and reconvene on Startrader. Agreed?" Both women nodded, and we headed for the landing pad and the gig. Before we boarded, though, I made sure Ellie sent the radio message resigning her position. I didn't want her to feel she still had a duty to report things to Westin.
Chapter 12
I was relieved to finally lift. With Ollie out of easy reach aboard Adventurer, Toray had spent most of yesterday complaining to me about the various shortcomings of Adventurer's reactivation. Since Ollie had pulled the rug from under his claims of deep involvement in his cure, Toray had been in a foul mood, and frequently railed at both Ollie and me, usually for something beyond our control.
Yesterday, for instance, he had insisted that we refurbish and redecorate the Captain's Mess so he could entertain visitors before we began on the redesignated "Staff Mess" for the staff already aboard. It had formerly been the Officer's Wardroom, and would eventually be again redesignated as the "Administration Department Mess".
The onboard crew had been using the "Staff Mess" since we'd brought them aboard, but the furnishings, like most on the old ship, were worn, stark and utilitarian. After all, on Adventurer's voyage, mass had been the primary consideration, and the colonists had lived aboard for over ten years. The Captain's Office and the Colony Administrator's Office were the only spaces aboard with even a token nod to style or comfort. Since Adventurer wasn't going anywhere now, we'd planned to bring the furnishings more in line with Haven standards.
But Toray saw some of the furnishings Ollie had bought, and demanded that the crew stop working on the Staff Mess, and instead redecorate the Captain's Mess with much more lavish furnishings. "After all," he declaimed dramatically, "I may have to entertain heads of state at any moment. I must have acceptable surroundings. The clerks and secretaries can manage for now."
; He actually tried to get me to have the furniture unloaded, while he arranged a shipment of "more suitable" furniture. I explained that any furniture he purchased would take days to deliver, plenty of time to deliver this shipment to Adventurer and return; but he was adamant. I waited until he went back to his office, and then sent the shipment off.
So, I was relieved to lift off. Toray was becoming increasingly difficult, and increasingly hostile to both Ollie and me.
We stopped at Adventurer to warn Ollie about Toray's latest tirade, and that he would be demanding an out-of-schedule renovation.
Of course, this also gave me a chance to give Ellie a tour, introduce her to Jane, and to give her some VR weapons familiarization and practice. Surprisingly, Ellie seemed to love weapons and combat. According to Heidi, she hadn't been bragging. "She's amazing with a knife," Heidi said. "She's fast and aggressive. She'll take some serious injury to reach her opponent. She reminds me of a diremouth; all attack, little defense." She shook her head. "It's effective, but it'll get her killed one day."
I nodded. "Well, let's try to keep her out of knife fights. I agree with you, though. I'm pretty good with a knife, but I wouldn't want to face her. That naked ferocity is intimidating."
Ellie, in turn, was very impressed with Adventurer and her VR. I had her run familiarizations with both laser and blaster. The laser impressed her with its power and easy accuracy, but the blaster's rather gruesome damage impressed her more. "The laser is accurate and deadly," she decided, "but the blaster's a stopper. When you're my size, it's important to stop an opponent quickly, and the blaster's sonics can actually knock a man down." I made a mental note to outfit her with a blaster and one of the fighting knives.
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