He rose and stepped toward the door, but his mother pulled him aside before he could sneak out.
“Lucas, you want to tell me now what’s going on?”
“I don’t know, Ma. Got a lot on my mind, I guess.”
“Don’t give me that, Lucas Bennett. That’s not what I’m seeing. I swear I know you better than you know yourself sometimes. You’ve been thinking about that woman you met, right?”
“I’d hardly call it meeting, Ma. I said hello to her at the coffee shop, and three days later, I’m pulling her out of a wreck.”
“Have you seen her since the accident?”
“Not since I left the hospital.” It had taken everything in him to leave her then. She’d been so fragile, so vulnerable lying on that bed, bandage on her head. His heart ached and he felt every pain that she felt.
“Well, if what Joey said is true, she’s all alone. You said she has a daughter. Recovering from an accident and taking care of a daughter, that’s a lot for anyone to take on, don’t you think?”
His mother didn’t expect an answer. It wasn’t really a question, anyway. More like a statement disguised as a question. One intended to steer him toward the conclusion she’d likely already drawn.
He hugged his mother because it was easier than looking her in the eye. She saw into him too easily. “I love you, Ma.”
“I know.” She paused. “What do you think you’re going to do from here?”
“I don’t know, Ma.” Despite Lucas’s objections, he knew exactly where he was headed next.
Chapter Ten
“LILY GRACE ROBINSON!”
Sarah gasped. Pain shot through her midsection like a fiery rage. She cradled her ribs and drew in short, ragged breaths, panting until the burn subsided. Although she’d gotten better in the week she’d been home from the hospital, yelling still sent shooting pains through her body as her lungs brushed against her sore ribs.
A thump, followed by loud, clomping footsteps echoed down the hall. Lily stomped twice in front of Sarah. Her fists were clenched at her sides, her shoulders hunched. Her face reddened with each second that passed.
Sarah counted to ten. It wasn’t Lily’s fault that Sarah moved so slowly. Lily had four-year-old energy and wanted to be outside playing, running and jumping, not stuck inside with her invalid mother. She calmed her voice. “Lily, what have I told you about your bed?”
“Not to bounce on it.”
“That’s right. And what were you doing in your room just now?”
Lily dropped her chin and stuck out her lower lip in a pout so cute Sarah covered her mouth so Lily didn’t see her laugh. “Bouncing.”
“Okay, well, I’d like you to sit on the floor beside the fireplace for four minutes and think about doing what Mommy asks you to do.”
“Yes, Mommy.” Lily shuffled over to the corner and plopped down, her feet stretched out, still pouting.
Sarah sighed. Children challenged parents even when they’re healthy, which she was not. She expected to bounce back quicker, but her progress was too slow. This past week at home with Lily had been painful. Between being able to do very little and Lily’s cabin fever, they both had had about enough.
Four minutes passed and Sarah sent Lily back down the hall to play. Sarah struggled to take care of herself with her bruised ribs, mild concussion, and general aches and pains. She couldn’t care for Lily if she got hurt, too. Right now, though, Sarah just wanted a few minutes’ peace before she had to pull herself off the couch and fix something for dinner.
She heard a gentle knock on the door.
“Argh.” She didn’t want to get up and answer the door. Why couldn’t she whine like her four-year-old daughter not getting what she wanted? But after a week of interaction limited to the preschool crowd, she craved adult contact. She’d carry on a conversation with the mailman if that’s what it took. She pulled herself off the couch and shuffled her way to the door, but she didn’t find the older, grandfatherly figure who delivered her mail on the other side.
“Hi,” Lucas said.
Her hand immediately flew to her head, patting down her stringy hair that hadn’t been washed in several days. Why did she always seem to look bad when she saw Lucas? She lowered her eyes. “Hi.”
Lucas stood on her porch, his gentle smile calming her, holding a bright pink bag. Today, instead of his paramedic uniform, his legs were wrapped in a worn pair of jeans, and a buttoned-up flannel shirt hanging loose over a T-shirt covered his chest. He looked much like the first day she met him—and equally sexy.
“What a surprise. Come on in.” She gingerly turned back to her living room.
Lucas rushed through the door and kicked it closed then wrapped his arm around her waist. “Here, lean on me.”
She sank into his support as he helped her to the couch. He pulled her closer, and she caught a whiff of his musky aftershave, the scent sending a jolt to her gut.
“I’m so sorry. I guess I didn’t think about you having to get up to answer the door.” He lowered her onto the couch and followed her down. His leg brushed up against hers and her belly twinged. What was he doing here? Despite having his number in her phone, she never really expected to see him. Well, around town, probably. It’s not like she could avoid him in a town the size of Oak Grove. But, to find him sitting on her couch, beside her right now, well, that was a whole other story. “So, how have you been? I mean, since the accident, obviously.”
“It’s slow moving. I think I’m getting better each day, but who knows? I can’t wait until I feel like my old self.”
“I didn’t mean to make things worse. I brought sustenance.” Lucas grinned and presented her the bright pink Mug ’n Muffin bag.
“Oh, Lucas, you’re a lifesaver.”
“I aim to please.” He grinned, wide and cocky, and she couldn’t help but smile along with him.
“Well, you have.” She clapped her hand over her mouth and his smile grew wider. “I can’t believe I just said that,” she mumbled through her fingers.
Lucas laughed, a deep, husky sound that seeped into her pores. He quirked an eyebrow. “Why not?”
“I guess because I don’t know you very well, and that sounded, uh…” She dropped her chin. She hoped he didn’t notice her red cheeks. “I don’t know… provocative.”
He tapped her chin with his finger. She kept her face down but looked up. “It sounded fine. Why do you think I stopped by today?”
“I don’t know.”
His intense gaze seemed to burn through to her soul, where she tried to hide from him. She draped her arms across her chest, not ready for him to discover what she couldn’t yet admit to herself.
“I’m here because I want to get to know you better. This is wild, I know. I mean, I meet you in the coffee shop and then the next thing I know, I’m pulling you out of a wreck. It’s crazy alright, but I’m not about to pass on this chance to get to know you better. If I could have strung two words together that day at the coffee shop, I would have chased you out the door and asked for your number, and I wouldn’t have waited a day before I called to ask you out.”
“Oh.” She didn’t know what to say. She couldn’t form words. Maybe she could distract herself for a minute. She fumbled with the bag in her hand and pulled it open. The delicious scent of freshly baked brownies drifted into the air. She reached in and pulled out the dark chocolate confection, scooping a generous portion of frosting on her finger and sticking it into her mouth.
She moaned. “Oh Lucas, I think I love…” Oh crap, what had she almost said? “…chocolate.”
He looked up, his eyebrows raised. A storm brewed just below the surface, his eyes probably mirroring the confusion she knew was in her own.
Did she say that out loud? Shit! She pulled her finger out of her mouth, a popping sound filling the room.
Pink crept up his neck.
Would she always be awkward and embarrassed around him?
“Oh man. Lily would love this brownie. This
is great.”
He wrapped his hand around hers and squeezed. “Tell me about your daughter.”
She stared at him, the gentleness of his touch and his look the night of the accident now mixed with something else. “Lily?”
Lucas laughed. “Do you have more than one?”
She joined in his laughter. “No, just Lily. She’s four and quite the handful. She’s not happy that I’ve been laid up this week. She’s got a lot of energy she’s not expending right now. I think we’ve both about had enough of each other. It’s tough some days.”
“I’m sure.”
Sarah looked away, her gaze falling to her wedding photo.
“Is that your husband?”
She didn’t want to discuss Alex. She had no business entertaining another man in her home. If she wanted a fresh start, though, she had to begin somewhere. Lucas sitting beside her was as good a chance as any.
“Yes, that’s Alex. Lily’s father. He… um, he died a few years ago.” Her voice cracked. Telling this story never got easier. She didn’t just remember it, she relived it each time. Including the gut-wrenching grief. “Our house caught on fire. A space heater overturned while Alex slept. Lily and I weren’t home. He couldn’t get out.” The last words came out choked, tears clogging her throat.
Lucas’s shoulders stiffened. He released her hand and ran his fingers through his hair. He refused to look at her. With his brows furrowed, he scrambled up from the couch and stalked toward the mantle. His back was to her as he stared at the photo. What was he thinking? When he finally spoke, his words were strangled and barely above a whisper. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”
She’d heard the words so many times, she no longer knew how to respond. God, she hated the pity in everyone’s eyes when they found out she was a widow.
Footsteps padded down the hall and Lily ran into the room. When she skidded to a stop and saw Lucas, her eyes widened.
Sarah extended a trembling hand to Lily. “Come over here, baby. I want to introduce you to someone.”
Lily curled into Sarah’s arm, clutching her as she stared at Lucas from behind Sarah. “This is Mr.… Oh my gosh, I don’t even know your last name.”
Lucas crossed the room and crouched in front of Lily, his face at her level. “My name is Lucas Bennett. But you can call me Lucas if you’d like.” He extended his hand toward Lily.
Lily turned to Sarah, who nodded her approval then Lily placed her hand in Lucas’s.
He shook it gently. “And what’s your name?”
“My name’s Lily. And this is my mommy.”
Lucas laughed. “Is that right?”
Lily turned back to Sarah. “Why is he here, Mommy?”
“Mr. Bennett… Lucas… was one of the men who helped me when I got hurt.”
Lily flung herself at Lucas, her little arms wrapping around his large body. “Thank you, Mr. Lucas, for saving my mommy.”
Lucas wrapped his arms around Lily and Sarah’s heart ached. Lily hugged him like a daughter hugged her father. Lily hadn’t said so but had shown Sarah in her own four-year-old way that the accident had scared her. Lily was too young to remember much more than fleeting glimpses of her life with Alex, but she felt his absence acutely, so Lily’s fear of something happening to Sarah was real.
The sight of Lily’s arms wrapped around Lucas rattled Sarah more than she’d expected.
“You’re very welcome, Lily. I couldn’t let anything happen to your mommy, now could I?”
Lily smiled and turned to Sarah. “Mommy, can I go outside and play?”
Sarah marveled at the rapidly changing emotions of her four-year-old. “I’m sorry, honey. You know Mommy’s not up to playing just yet. It won’t be long now.”
“I could go with her.”
Sarah’s head snapped up. She couldn’t have heard him right.
He continued. “Lily, do you like to kick a soccer ball?”
Lily jumped up and down. “Yes!”
Lucas turned to Sarah. “If it’s okay with your mom, that is.”
She scrutinized him. Why would a grown man want to play with her four-year-old daughter? But the question only lingered a moment. There was trust in this man’s eyes, and Emma vouched for him when they’d spoken after her accident. “If that’s what you’d like, Lily. But you have to listen to Mr. Lucas, and when he says it’s time, you have to come in.”
“Yay.” Lily ran toward the kitchen door, quickly passing out of Sarah’s sight. What was she doing trusting her daughter’s welfare to a stranger? But Lucas had saved her and he had a way about him that engendered trust. She knew deep down that Lily would be safe with him.
Lucas straightened to follow Lily, but Sarah grabbed his hand. His head spun to their clasped hands and then to her face. She carefully pulled herself up from the couch. “Thank you so much, Lucas. For everything.”
Lucas brushed his finger down her arm, and new butterflies took up residence in her stomach. With a final smile for her, he rushed out the back door after Lily.
Chapter Eleven
“SHIT,” LUCAS MURMURED under his breath.
“That’s a bad word,” Lily’s little voice chided. “We’re not supposed to say bad words.”
“You’re right, sweetie. I’m sorry.”
“That’s okay.” Lily darted away from him, running circles around the yard, her arms extended like an airplane.
He had no business standing here, watching a little girl whose father was killed in a fire. Coming here was a mistake. He’d hesitated before knocking on the door in the first place, then for Sarah to tell him about her husband. So much death at the hands of the beast. Shawn. Sarah’s husband. This is why Lucas couldn’t be with anyone. He couldn’t risk leaving someone alone. He glanced at the back gate. He could dart out of the yard and hop into his truck and drive away. Leave Sarah and Lily alone. Not start anything he had no business finishing. But his feet stayed planted on the deck, his arms crossed.
Sarah had no idea how sexy she was. She seemed hesitant, wary maybe, but she had a strength just beneath the surface. He’d seen it the first day he met her, during the accident, and again the next day when she’d awoken with her fighting spirit intact. She was strong and spunky, and he couldn’t wait to peel back more layers to see what else he’d find.
The door squeaked behind him and Sarah stepped out onto the deck. He rushed to her side, extending his hand to help her. It didn’t matter if she needed support, he’d take any excuse to touch her. She placed her hand on his arm, and together they walked down the stairs. Her long, blonde hair hung down her back, tousled in a way that called to him, made him want to run his fingers through the silky strands. He could practically feel her soft curves against his hard chest, her arms around his waist. What in the hell was he doing fantasizing about Sarah while her daughter played right in front of them? He was more screwed up than he thought.
“Thanks, Lucas.”
Her voice speared him, the husky sound stroking him like a lover’s hand. His groin tightened. He released her and pulled at his jeans before he embarrassed himself.
“Anytime. How about I grab that chair for you?”
“That sounds great.”
He reached for two chairs on the small deck attached to her house. He placed them side by side and then helped Sarah sit. After she was settled, he gritted his teeth and took the seat beside her, his arm brushing hers. The chairs could have been farther away, but this way, he had an excuse for touching her. Accidentally, of course.
They sat in comfortable silence for a few moments, both of them staring into the backyard. Lily crawled behind a bug in the grass, her butt sticking up in the air and her nose to the ground. While he enjoyed the comfort of sitting with Sarah, watching her daughter play, the scene was one he couldn’t have. Wouldn’t have. But that didn’t stop him from dreaming.
Maybe it was a pipe dream, but he wanted to be the one pushing a pretty little girl with blonde curls on a swing with the woman he loved standing
beside him. It wouldn’t be hard to build, and it would fit nicely in the corner of Sarah’s yard. After all these years, he finally understood the stolen glances and secret smiles his parents shared while watching him and his brothers playing in the yard or Rachel climbing in the tree house Dad had built. That was a family, and for the first time in his life, he could picture himself having one.
He had no business imagining a future with Sarah and Lily. He wouldn’t put her in a position to mourn someone else in her life. He couldn’t have the dream. He couldn’t even wish for it.
He watched Sarah, her eyes closed and her face turned toward the autumn sun. Her mouth was upturned and it took all his restraint to keep from kissing her pouty lips. He reached out and wrapped his fingers around hers, her hand small and soft in his. A warm feeling coursed through him. Too much. She slowly lowered her chin, her gaze falling to where their hands touched then locking on his for just a moment. She left her hand in his as they turned back to the yard.
With every minute that passed, he relaxed. His shoulders lowered and his heart calmed. The feeling of sitting beside Sarah, with Sarah, was comfortable, easy. And that was the problem. He should be finding a way to extract himself before he got in any deeper. If he left now, he could head home and take a nap and a cold shower before his midnight shift… but he couldn’t force himself to leave.
“I put a lasagna in the oven before I came out. You’ll stay for dinner, won’t you?”
He eyed her back gate again. About tens steps and he’d be gone. But Sarah was pulling him into her orbit with her gentle words and her soothing touch. And he was powerless to resist—no matter the risk. “As long as it’s not too much trouble.”
“I want you to stay.”
He squeezed her hand. Warmth passed from hers to his. “Then I’d love to.”
THE SHADOWS LENGTHENED in the back yard and the sun sank lower in the sky. Sarah had no idea how long she and Lucas had been sitting side by side, holding hands. Her palm grew sweaty in his, but she didn’t pull away. Her arm grew numb, but she didn’t let go. From time to time, she turned toward him. He always smiled back, but neither of them spoke.
One Last Risk (Oak Grove Series Book 1) Page 8