Under Your Skin

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Under Your Skin Page 14

by Shannyn Schroeder


  She disconnected and rolled to her side, putting a pillow between her knees for comfort. She’d always known she came from a messed up family, but she really took the cake. She just spent the night flirting with her boss who was also her brother’s boss while pregnant with another man’s baby that she wasn’t keeping. It had daytime TV written all over it. But like she’d said to Kai, she didn’t care. It felt good to be wanted. It made her feel normal and she’d been missing that.

  Only a few more weeks and she could start getting back to normal. What was the harm in enjoying time with Kai until he no longer needed her to take care of his mom? It wasn’t like it could go too far. She was pregnant, and even after having the baby, it would be weeks before she could have sex and probably even longer until she felt good enough to want to. When it was time to move on, they both would. They could just take it for what it could be: a good time.

  * * *

  Over the course of the next week, Norah met with Teagan and spoke with Kim and Trevor. She’d decided they were the best match for her. Her appointments with the doctor seemed to come faster and faster even though they were only a week apart. Life had become a pleasant routine albeit a bit physically difficult. Where Lani was gaining strength and speed in their walks, Norah was slowing down. Lani hadn’t sped by yet, but Norah had no doubt it might happen soon.

  On the first of their daily walks, Norah’s head was filled with the e-mail she’d received from Avery. He’d gotten the paperwork and said he’d sign and return it.

  Overall, the e-mail was friendly. Little more than businesslike. She had a hard time remembering what she liked so much about Avery. The more she thought about it, the more she realized that she’d been in love with the idea of her and Avery, not the man himself. Not too surprising, since she’d been in love more times than she could count since she’d discovered boys at the age of twelve.

  “You’re awful quiet today,” Lani commented.

  “Lot on my mind.”

  “When are you due?”

  “Couple more weeks. Although the doctor said since this is my first, don’t count on being on time. She said she’ll induce after two weeks.” She inhaled as deeply as the baby would allow, which wasn’t much. “Seems like a long way off.”

  “It’ll happen sooner than you think. You spend those last weeks praying to get that thing out of you and when it’s ready, you’re not anymore.” She chuckled.

  Norah didn’t like the sound of that any more than she liked the idea of waiting another month.

  “What about after?”

  “What about it?”

  “Do you have plans?”

  Norah shrugged. “Not really.”

  “Then you’ll come back here.”

  “Well, uh . . .” She didn’t know what to say. Kai hadn’t mentioned how long this job would last, but he’d made it clear he’d hired her because no one else would. “Kai hasn’t said—”

  “Pssh. We already discussed how little that boy says.”

  Something about the way she always referred to Kai as a boy made Norah smile.

  “My therapist will stop coming here within the next couple of weeks. Then I’m supposed to make it to them. I’ll probably be here for at least another month.”

  “Well, Lani, we’ll see.” She patted the woman’s arm. As much as she liked the job and enjoyed the pay, she couldn’t assume Kai didn’t have plans to replace her when she had the baby. She didn’t know how much recovery time she’d need.

  After their walk and lunch, they played a game of gin rummy where Lani stomped her. Norah was grateful they didn’t play for cash. The woman had no mercy on the pregnant girl. Then Lani settled on the couch with her latest novel, which meant she’d be napping soon.

  Norah checked the time and hoped Kim was done with teaching for the day as she dialed the number.

  “Hello?”

  “Hi, Kim? It’s Norah O’Malley. Teagan gave me your number and said it was okay to call.”

  “It’s definitely okay. I’m glad you called.”

  “I wanted to let you know that I received an e-mail from the baby’s father and he’ll sign off on everything, so we’re okay.”

  “Excellent. How are you?”

  “I’m okay. The baby is kicking up a storm and pressing on things that don’t feel like they should be squooshed, but my doctor assures me it’s all normal.”

  “And how are you after getting the e-mail?”

  It was kind of her to ask, but Norah should’ve expected it. Kim had been so kind and generous every time they spoke. “I’m okay, really. Thanks for asking.” She paused, suddenly unsure if she wanted to continue.

  “Was there something else you wanted to talk about?”

  “Yeah, actually. You know I’m due in two weeks.”

  “Mmm-hmm.”

  Norah heard the restrained excitement in her voice. She wondered how many times Kim and Trevor had been this close to having a baby and had someone change her mind. She wished she could offer some kind of reassurance.

  “Well, although I can’t sign the papers and make everything official for three days after she’s born, Teagan said I can decide who she goes home with. I’d like that to be you.”

  “Uh. Could you hold on a minute?” Kim sounded near tears. “I’m putting you on speaker. Trevor just walked in.”

  “Hi, Trevor.”

  “Hi,” he answered. “What’s up?”

  “I was talking to Kim about naming you guys as the people who would take the baby home. I don’t want to take her home with me and I really don’t want her in a foster home for three days. That’s not fair to her. She belongs with people who love her.”

  “Are you sure?” Kim asked.

  “I get it. I do. You’re worried that I’ll tell you to take her and you’ll fall in love with her and then I’ll want her back. I won’t. I’m not lying to myself and acting like it’s not a big deal, but I’m okay with this decision. I can’t bring her home with me.”

  “Yes,” Trevor said, his voice clear as if he’d moved closer to the phone. “Of course we’ll take her.”

  “You can think about it. We have a couple of weeks at least.” She took a deep breath. “There’s one more thing. In the hospital, they’re going to ask me to fill out the birth certificate. It seems stupid for me to name your baby. Then you’d have to file paperwork to change it. If you tell me what name you want, I’ll write it in.”

  Kim came back on the line. “Her name isn’t important. If you have something you like, we’d be okay with that.”

  “So if I named her Butterfly, you’d be okay?”

  Silence met her joke.

  “I was kidding, guys.”

  Nervous laughter followed. Norah rolled her eyes. “Really. I don’t have any special names.” She’d never sat around as a teen picturing her wedding and naming imaginary babies.

  “What do you think about Ella?” Kim asked quietly, her words just above a whisper.

  “I take it the name is special to you?”

  “It was my grandma’s name and we were close. I think it’s pretty and timeless.”

  Norah admitted the name was pretty. “Ella it is then.”

  They said their good-byes. As crummy as her life was, she at least brought happiness to Kim and Trevor over something as simple as a name. It made her feel good.

  * * *

  More days passed and Norah was increasingly frustrated with Kai. He had yet to address their late-night phone call. She hadn’t brought it up because she figured he needed time to think things through. He always measured his words carefully, but he was making her crazy. He barely spoke a few measly sentences since his revelation.

  She arrived at his house early, hoping to catch him lifting weights in the basement or at least before he ran out the door. As she walked into the living room, he came from around the corner, thankfully dressed, but his hair hung loose at his collar, still damp from the shower. God, how she wanted to touch it.

  “You
’re early.”

  “Yeah. I was hoping we could talk.”

  “Shoot.”

  She glanced around for Lani, but didn’t see her. “Alone?”

  He stiffened at the word. Was she really that bad?

  One sharp nod and then he grabbed his keys and pointed toward the front door. He obviously didn’t want Lani to hear anything. She followed him outside.

  At the bottom of the steps, he turned to look at her, but said nothing.

  “We need to talk about that phone conversation. About us. This.” She waved a hand between them.

  “You want to talk about a talk?” One eyebrow—the left one with the small scar above it—arched.

  “You know what I mean. We said stuff that can’t be unsaid.”

  “So?”

  “So what are we going to do about it?”

  “Nothing.”

  The word was sharp and jabbed at her. But really, what did she expect? That he’d been simply waiting for her to say something before sweeping her off her feet?

  “Why not?”

  “A lot of reasons.” He stepped closer and palmed her belly. “She’s the biggest one.”

  The fact that he referred to her child as she shouldn’t have been endearing, but Norah melted a little over it. “She’ll be out of the picture in a couple of weeks.”

  Just then, Ella kicked and flipped. “Whoa.” It was hard enough to steal Norah’s breath.

  Kai jerked his hand away. “You okay?”

  Norah nodded.

  “Just because you have her doesn’t mean she’ll be gone. You have a lot going on.”

  “So a little escape would be good.”

  “I’m not an escape. Go find some little frat boy.”

  She wrinkled her nose at him. “I don’t want a frat boy. Been there, done that. I want something different. I like you.”

  “You don’t even know me.”

  Well, damn, he had her there. “I like the parts I know. You remembered what kind of yogurt I crave and bought me some, even though it’s disgusting. You held me and let me cry on you when my ex was an asshole. You offered to beat up my brother for making me cry. You love your mom even when she makes you crazy.” She stepped closer, her belly brushing against him. “And I really, really liked the way you kissed me.”

  “You choose to see what you want. You wouldn’t like the rest. This can’t go anywhere.”

  “You said you want me.”

  “I’m no stranger to wanting what I can’t have.”

  “But you can have me.”

  He turned and stepped away. “No, Norah, I can’t.”

  “Why not?”

  He didn’t answer. He got into his car and pulled away. Norah went back into the house, even more frustrated.

  Lani was dressed for their walk. “Ready?”

  “Sure. Let’s go.” Maybe a little exercise would relax her tense muscles and calm the baby.

  As they eased down the sidewalk, Lani talked about her latest book and how she couldn’t wait for her next book club. Norah only halfway listened because she had to focus on walking. Her breaths were a little shallow and it felt like she wore a belt that tightened with each step.

  “What do you think?” Lani asked.

  “I’m sorry, what?”

  “I said, do you think Kai would let me host again? The house is so quiet while he’s at work and we don’t have to censor our language.”

  “I don’t know, but you should ask.” Norah knew he wouldn’t deny his mom’s request, even though he’d hate every minute. She touched Lani’s arm. “Do you think we can cut this a little short today? I’m not feeling well.”

  “Sure. Are you okay?”

  “Yeah, it’s just stress, maybe some gas.” She took a slow, steadying breath. They walked back to the house, which suddenly felt like it was a mile away.

  Crap. If it was already this hard to keep moving, how would she ever last beyond her due date? She and Lani held on to each other as they climbed the steps. In the living room, they both sat on the couch.

  Norah rubbed her belly in rhythmic circles.

  “You’re not looking so good.”

  “I’m fine. Just need a break.” She closed her eyes and imagined sitting on the beach, water lapping at her feet. Nothing calmed her though. Her breathing still felt short and she was restless. The need to move forced her back to her feet. Her back ached and the tight feeling around her belly constricted, but at least the baby stopped kicking. She probably fell asleep to the motion of Norah’s swaying body.

  Norah walked to the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water. She hoped the cool liquid would soothe her. That was when the first sharp pain hit. Her knees almost buckled. She knocked the glass over on the counter and it rolled until it fell and shattered on the floor.

  “Norah?”

  Norah took a deep breath as the pain subsided. “I’m okay. Just dropped a glass.”

  She straightened and inhaled to make sure the pain was truly gone. She was okay, so she lowered to the floor with some paper towel to clean up the glass. Great. In addition to feeling like an ox, she had the grace of one as well. After dumping all of the shards in the trash, she wet the paper towel to grab the pieces that were nearly unnoticeable.

  The simple task wore her out. She washed her hands to make sure no glass stuck to her and went back to the living room. As she neared the couch, another pain hit.

  “Norah, you’re pale. And that didn’t look like a baby kick. I think you’re in labor.”

  No. No. She wasn’t due for another week and a half. Maybe more. She shook her head. Lani pushed up from the couch and walked over to where Norah had a death grip on the armchair.

  Norah pushed back. “I’m okay. See?”

  “That’s the way contractions work. They start, stop, start. I think we should call an ambulance.”

  “No. I can’t afford an ambulance. Plus, they’ll take me to the closest hospital. I want to be with my doctor. I’ll call Jimmy.”

  She dug her phone out of her purse. She got Jimmy’s voice mail, so she left a message and hoped it didn’t freak him out too much. Then she called her doctor who started asking questions like how far apart the contractions were. Like Norah paid attention to that? She guessed eight or ten minutes. The doctor said she had time and didn’t have to rush to the hospital, but she should get there.

  “Lani, you can sit back down. Jimmy will call back. He’ll come and get me.” Another contraction hit, stopping her from saying more.

  “That was no eight minutes.”

  “It’s fine. Jimmy will come.” He always did. If she believed in nothing else, she could believe in that.

  The restlessness attacked again. She wanted to move, but she didn’t. She wanted to sit, curl into a ball, and wait for it all to go away, but then she wanted to stomp her feet. She settled for a short pacing circuit in the living room under Lani’s watchful eye.

  “It’s probably not even the real thing. There’s such a thing as false labor, right? That totally sounds like something that would happen to me.”

  Another contraction hit and Norah began to realize it probably was the real deal. And no way was she ready.

  Lani’s voice reached her as the pain waned and Norah realized she was talking on the phone. Then she was rubbing Norah’s back. “Kai’s on his way. He’ll take you to the hospital.”

  “Jimmy will come.” Kai wasn’t supposed to take her to the hospital. Then she realized Kai would probably send Tommy. Tommy was an acceptable substitute for Jimmy. She took a few more steps and turned again. Lani had disappeared from her side, and Norah appreciated the freedom.

  When the pain returned, it didn’t seem as bad this time. She didn’t even have to bend over. It was like passing a gas bubble—uncomfortable, but not painful. Maybe it was a false alarm. The front door flung open and Kai stomped in.

  Chapter Nine

  Kai was going to kill his mother for pulling this. She needed to understand he had a business to r
un. “What the hell is going on?”

  “Norah needs to get to the hospital, just like I told you when I called.” The look on her face told him she was serious.

  “I thought you were playing games.” He looked at Norah. “I thought you weren’t due yet.”

  “I’m not. Why didn’t you send Tommy?”

  “I don’t know where Tommy is. He’s not working today.” Suddenly, his mom was at his side, handing him a towel and a plastic bag. “What’s this?”

  “Go put the plastic on your seat and cover it with the towel in case her water breaks.”

  Aw, fuck. That was disgusting. “Call an ambulance.”

  “No. I want my hospital with my doctor.” Norah waved a hand, but he saw she was weak. “Don’t worry. I called Jimmy. He’ll come.”

  “I don’t know who this Jimmy is, but she called him an hour ago and he hasn’t shown or called. She might be delusional.”

  This was going to fall on him. What the hell? “Come on. Let’s get you where you need to be.”

  His mom slid a purse over Norah’s shoulder. “Your phone is in the front pocket.”

  “Thanks.”

  “What about you?” Kai asked his mom.

  “I’ll be fine here. I’ll call Jaleesa to stop by.” She snapped her fingers. “Take care of that girl.”

  Norah had made it as far as the front door and then doubled over with a moan. Her face crumpled with pain. Her fingers wrapped on the door frame in a white-knuckled grip. This was ridiculous. With the towel and bag in his fist, he scooped her up in his arms and elbowed the door open.

  “Put me down. I can walk in a minute.”

  “With my luck in a minute that baby will be popping out.” He carried her to the car and set her on her feet at the curb. He laid the plastic and the towel on the seat like his mom suggested and then reconsidered. “Would the backseat be better?”

  “This is fine.” She turned and put her butt first on the seat and then swiveled her legs and feet in.

  He closed the door carefully and then got behind the wheel. She quietly told him how to get to the hospital, which by his estimation would take a good thirty minutes. He hoped to God they made it in time. Given that it was still early in the day, he opted to hop on the expressway. Traffic moved smoothly and he coasted at an easy sixty miles an hour across the city.

 

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