by L. M. Carr
A soft melodious hymn fills the air while my loved ones and other faceless people watch as I step slowly, keeping in tune to the music while my father guides me toward Adam who waits patiently for me. I have never been happier in my life. Everything I’ve ever wanted is mere feet away, just within my reach. My father’s large, rugged hand reaches down to grasp my slender hand. He places my hand in Adam’s.
I pull my gaze from our clasped hands and all I want to see is the man of my dreams, the love of my life. Instead, an angry Chris DeGennaro looks down at me with the face of Lucifer himself.
“Hello, Mia. I’ve been waiting for you.” The devil smiles at me.
About the Author
L.M. Carr is the author of realistic and relatable Contemporary Romance novels. Each story is crafted to draw upon your heartstrings while taking you on an emotional journey. Infused with an element of suspense, pages are turned until the characters reach their destination of a HEA. Since 2015, seven novels have been published by L. M. Carr.
Email: [email protected]
Facebook: Author LM Carr
Twitter: @LM_Carr
Website: www.authorlmcarr.com
Excerpt from Giving Up for You
Prologue
FOOD. AIR. SHELTER. Those are three things needed for a human being to survive, not thrive . . . just survive. What can you do when the air needed to breathe is sucked out of you and is no more? How can you live? Maybe you can’t. Perhaps you find an alternative. Death is an alternative. I might as well be dead; I have nothing to live for. Except I do because some things are worth saving. Some things are worth fighting for. Some things are worth the sacrifice.
Chapter One
“NO, PLEASE. PLEASE, don’t do this,” a desperate whimper turns into a full blown wail as I jerk awake into an upright position causing the remote control to fall to the floor with a crash, sending the batteries rolling in all directions. I blink rapidly to rouse myself. The room is dark. I am alone in Adam’s bed with sweat beading across my forehead and hot tears creeping down my face. I force myself to control the panic raging throughout my shaking body, sending my heart into erratic beats. I wipe my brow with the cuff of my sleeve and then swipe it across my nose before pulling my knees into my chest, rocking myself reassuringly with bated breath, thankful that it was just a dream. It was just a dream.
“Mia!” The bedroom door flies open and Adam stands there with a look of sheer panic across his handsome face. “Baby, what’s wrong?” The sobs that were nearly controlled start all over and as hard as I try, I can’t stop. In an instant, his strong arms wrap around me, cocooning me, making me feel safe and secure. Making me feel loved. God, I love this man with every fiber of my being.
“Shhh . . . it’s okay. You’re okay, babe.” I’m pulled onto his lap and he showers my damp forehead with kisses and calming words. “What happened?”
Small hiccups shake my body as I inhale and exhale, calming down. I nuzzle into the crook of his neck and take a deep breath, memorizing his scent while my fingers find themselves around the nape of his neck, grasping at his dark wavy hair and hold on for dear life. He is my lifeline. I can’t ever lose him or his children.
“Adam,” I breathe raggedly, “please don’t ever leave me.”
I have his full attention when he pulls back and looks down at me. “Baby, what are you talking about? I’m not going anywhere.” His full lips meet mine. “I love you.”
“My God. It was awful.” I start to tell him about my dream which quickly morphed into a nightmare in which Chris DeGennaro took center stage. “We . . . we were getting married.” I look at him sheepishly, feeling slightly embarrassed remembering Maddie’s question at breakfast about whether or not we were going to get married. I never did hear what his response was. “My father walked me down a little wooded path, deep through a thick forest and I was so happy. Completely overjoyed. There were so many people. Everybody we knew was there. The kids, Shelby, Mike, Pete, my mom, Josh, Araceli, Nate and Katherine. Their faces were beaming with smiles as I walked past them. Then there were all these other faceless people that I didn’t know. All I can remember is their faces were pulled into frowns like a tragedy mask. It was weird.” I shake my head and let out a little disbelieving chuckle when I tell him that even Gina was there. How she managed to find her way into my dream is beyond me. “I kept thinking that I didn’t care who was there. I just couldn’t wait to get to you. I saw you standing, looking so handsome in a black tuxedo, smiling and waiting patiently for me. It seemed to take forever to get to you.” I scrub my hands over my face and run my fingers through my wayward hair. “When I finally reached you, my father, looking so stunning in his tux, lifted my veil and kissed my cheek, telling me that I will always be his little girl. His eyes were red and brimming with absolute love and pride. I told him how much I loved him and that I missed him so much. He said he knew and that they missed me, too. Him and Lily.”
“Go on,” Adam encouraged. “What happened then? Sounds like a pretty good dream to me so far.” My eyes cast upward to meet his and I find a huge grin across his face.
“I watched my father take my hand and place it in yours, but when I looked up, it wasn’t you—it was Chris DeGennaro. His face was contorted and filled with pure anger as he looked at me. I swear to God, when his face transformed into a conniving smile, he looked like the devil himself.” I shake my head to clear my thoughts. “He said that he was there to take you away from me. That I didn’t deserve to be happy because I killed my baby and her father.” My words choke out. “I screamed and begged for you to stay, but you wouldn’t. I stood there and watched helplessly as you led Maddie and Luke away from me.”
Adam holds me close and squeezes me to his chest, the warmth and love radiating through his shirt. “Baby, you have me. You have the kids. You’ll always have us.”
“I know, but it just felt so real.”
I hear the distant sound of Maddie and Luke coming upstairs, calling their father’s name, no doubt wondering where he is. I don’t want either one of them to see me crying so I quickly kiss his neck before jumping up and rushing into the bathroom to wash my face. I look horrible. I feel horrible. My cheeks are blotchy and red, my eyes glassy and swollen. Facing the kids without them asking a million questions will be quite an accomplishment.
Adam knocks lightly on the door. “Mia, do you want me to come in?” I’m sure if I were to open the door, I’d find his forehead against it with worry etched across his face.
Looking from the mirror to the door and back to the mirror, I don’t want him to see me like this in the fluorescent light of the vanity. I’m a mess and he’s seen me cry enough over the last few weeks. “I’m fine. I just need a minute. Go on down with the kids. I’ll be there in a few. I promise.”
I’m met with silence. Then I hear his quiet words, “Okay. Come down when you’re ready.”
God, I know I’m overreacting, but that nightmare felt so real. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a different nightmare. In the reoccurring, all too familiar nightmare, the one that has plagued me for years, the manufacturing plant explodes, erupting into a huge, flaming orange mushroom sending smoke, fire and plume up into the air against the dark night sky seconds after my father vanishes beyond the threshold of the heavy steel door. That image will always haunt me.
I remind myself that Adam is here. The kids are here and we are safe. I guess I didn’t realize how much stress I’ve been under with Gina showing up all around the neighborhood. Trying to convince my nerves to calm down now that I know the truth about Nora and the nature of her relationship with Adam is easier said than done. I think I’ll always be a little insecure about the women of Adam’s past. It wasn’t all that long ago, but I know he’s a different man now. Having witnessed the interaction between Chris and Adam has me on edge. I’ve never seen Adam become so volatile at a moment’s notice. Angry? Yes. Annoyed? Yes. Violent? No. Definitely not.
The warm washcloth scrubs across
my face, wiping off the smeared mascara, and I will myself to get it together. One last splash of water, I tug my hair up into a sloppy bun and I’m ready to go.
When I step back into his bedroom, part of me wants to curl up and pull his pillow into me. The other part of me wants to take the stairs two at a time and rush into his arms. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I readjust my socks and notice my phone sitting on the bedside table and see I have a missed call from my mom. I listen to the voicemail. She sounds off again. Shaking my head, I wonder what she’s up to now. My poor mom. I glance at the alarm clock and realize it’s nearly five o’clock; I’ve slept almost all afternoon. I don’t remember coming to bed; the last thing I remember was cuddling with Maddie on the couch after we decorated the tree. The image of the two additional Christmas stockings hanging by the fireplace brings a smile to my face. Adam really is trying to make us a family with that small gesture. I love him even more for that.
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