Caleb ignored the question and glanced down. “How’s all that going? How’re you feelin’?”
Protective shield up high for the workday, Phoenix didn’t feel like heading straight for vulnerability. He hated these questions and the implied pity that went with them.
“I’m okay. You?”
“Yeah, I’m decent,” he said, balling up his empty wrapper and arcing it into a wastebasket. “I saw Orchid again.”
“You did? She okay?” Phoenix pictured the gash above her hazel eyes. He’d thought to send flowers and a note after her accident. Peonies were her favorite. But there was no point.
“Yeah, she came into the shop.”
“With her fear of needles, I doubt it was to get a tattoo.” On the heels of pleasant memories came one of her staring at his residual limb on the day she claimed she’d learned about his injury.
“She came in to ask about you. She was clueless about your accident.”
“So what?”
“Sounds like you wronged her big time.”
“I was going through some shit, if you remember.”
“Come to think of it, guess I was pretty shitty to her too.”
“I don’t want to talk about Orchid,” Phoenix said, glancing at his watch. “I’ve got to prep for a meeting.”
Caleb shrugged. “No skin off my back. But I thought you guys would’ve been good together.”
Phoenix plopped back onto the chair and ran a hand through his hair. “Yup, I thought we would’ve, too. That whole thing blows.”
“Maybe she’s changed? Maybe she just needed a minute to get used to the idea?”
“Since when did you become a Orchid supporter?”
“She’s got feelings for you. She wants to talk.”
“Last time I saw her, she called a little cut on her forehead hideous. She said she was disfigured. I can’t imagine how disgusted she’d be over my scars.”
“Seriously, man. Who you trying to protect? Her? Or you?”
Some truth in that question struck him. He wanted to believe in his altruistic intentions in keeping her at bay. It didn’t have to do with his own fear of rejection. She wouldn’t be able to deal.
Phoenix rose from his chair, anger over injuries he thought he’d accepted. His face flushed. “I told you, I don’t want to talk about this.” He strode to his desk and slammed a drawer open, pulling bound papers from it.
“You’re throwing away a good thing,” Caleb said, standing.
“Then you go out with her,” Phoenix said, glaring at his brother.
“I think I will,” he said, and pushed his way out the door. “Bye, Liv,” he called over his shoulder.
How can Caleb have such a different interpretation of what’s possible? Phoenix thought.
CHAPTER 46
YELLOW SUN
Phoenix
THURSDAY MARCH 21
“Mom?”
“Yes, Phoenix, it’s me. It’s a wonder you recognize my voice, given how long it’s been since you called.”
“Absence makes the heart grow fonder,” he joshed, stretching on his sofa.
“Someday, I’m going to be gone and you’re going to miss me,” came her familiar refrain.
“Aw, I miss you already,” he said. He popped in his air pods so that he could flip through news headlines on his phone while talking.
“Good. Because we’re seeing each other next week.”
“Next week? You coming for a visit?” He sat up, running through his mental calendar.
“Easter with your aunt and uncle and cousins. Have you forgotten?”
“Is it Easter already?” he asked. Isn’t Easter in April?
“March 31st, the earliest it’s been in five years.”
“Oh, okay, thanks for the reminder. I’ll be there. They want us down on Saturday, right?”
“That’s right. I’ll be flying in that day. George is going to pick me up. Are you bringing anyone?” Mom asked.
Unbidden, Orchid came to mind.
“Nope, there’s no one to bring.”
“Not Rina?”
He’d rarely thought of Rina since they parted ways. “Rina? We broke up.”
“Uh-oh. What happened?”
He recalled their easy companionship. Weekends now felt empty. “It wasn’t any one thing. You know how you always said you and Dad fell madly in love the moment you met? We didn’t have that.”
“Well, it’s not love at first sight for everyone. Dad and I were lucky. Honestly, how many times have you had that happen?”
“Once.” A dark-haired beauty pricked at his memory. He pushed the images away. “Never,” he corrected himself.
She puffed some air. “Well, which is it? Must be a complicated love life.”
“I couldn’t even begin to tell you,” he admitted.
“Who was it? Tish? I liked her.”
“No, not Tish. Someone else you’ve never met.”
“As long as it’s not that horrible woman who abandoned you because of your accident. What’s her name? Orchid?”
“She didn’t abandon me. I’ve told you.”
“Leave, abandoned, never showed up, all the same wretched selfish thing,” his mom spat, surprising him with her vehemence.
“She’s not selfish,” he protested, wondering why he was defending her.
“You’ve always been overly generous in your estimation of others. You need to protect yourself first.”
Phoenix was too tired to correct her. He didn’t want to talk about it. “Okay, Mom.”
He nearly chimed in with his good-bye when she started up again.
“How’s the phantom pain?”
“It’s usually not too bad.”
“Is the mirror box therapy helping?”
“Yeah, amazing how the brain can be tricked into thinking a missing limb is still there. That guy who invented the technique is pure genius.”
Phoenix had been skeptical of the idea that seeing his right leg in a mirror would fool his brain into thinking his left leg was still there. Minds are mysterious. Somehow, it did diminish his pain.
“Maybe I should come out early, or stay with you for a bit after Easter.”
“You’re always welcome here, but really, there’s no need. How’s your business? It’s been busy, right?”
“Yeah, people in this town take on redecoration like spring cleaning. I’ve got two clients who need whole rooms redone before the holidays.”
“Then I’ll just see you at Easter.”
“Remember, if you change your mind, feel free to bring someone next week.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” When hell freezes over.
CHAPTER 47
HELLO OPERATOR
Caleb
THURSDAY MARCH 21, NEW BRUNSWICK
“Hey, Mom. How are you?” Caleb answered, twirling the cord attached to the old-fashioned handset Sascha had purchased for their shop.
“I’m well. Thank you. I’ve just spoken with your brother and I’m sharing the same reminder with you.”
“What’s that?” he asked.
“Have you forgotten? Easter with your aunt and uncle and cousins, at their shore house. Make sure you’ve booked both days.”
He suppressed a groan, sinking into the black vinyl armchair, its fluffed surface sighing under his weight.
He stared at the pinup calendar on the wall. “Okay, I’ll be there, Mom.”
“Good.” She paused a moment. “I’m a little worried about Phoenix.”
“Oh yeah? What’s the matter?”
“He doesn’t tell me how he’s really doing. Have you seen him recently?”
“Yup. We had lunch at his office.”
“Well, that’s nice. How is he?”
“He’s the sam
e stubborn person he’s always been.”
“He sounds a little down to me.”
“Of anyone I know, he’s got a right to be down.” Caleb shook his head, imagining how he’d feel in Phoenix’s situation.
“But it’s more than his injuries. He told me he broke up with his girlfriend.”
“When I saw him, we had an argument over a girl,” Caleb said, thinking of Orchid even though Mom’s comment referred to Rina.
“Uh oh, you’re not—”
“Oh, c’mon Mom, of course not. You guys are never going to let me live down a couple of stolen girlfriends,” he complained. “It’s just he’s got some crazy notion, like he needs to be perfect, and he’s not good enough for any woman. That accident messed with his head.”
“He’s always held himself to such high standards. I don’t know where he gets it from.”
“Really?”
She ignored the sarcasm. “Are you bringing anyone, dear? You know Harry’s invited Lucy.”
He thought for a moment, an idea striking him. “Yeah, maybe I’ll bring a girl, too.”
“Is it Sascha? She was good for you.”
“Yeah, she’s good for me. But she’s not coming.”
“Why not?”
“It’s a long story, but you know we broke up a while ago.”
“So, should I ask your Aunt Betsy to put you and your friend in the same room or separate rooms?”
“Separate rooms. Definitely.”
“Oh, is she not pretty enough for you?”
“She’s a pretty one alright.”
“If she’s not your type, maybe your brother would be interested.”
“You’re closer to the truth than you know, Mom.”
“Now I’m intrigued. Who is this mystery woman?”
“Wait and see, Mom. You’ve always said patience is a virtue.”
“Good news,” Caleb growled.
Orchid stared at her phone’s screen, surprised to see Caleb’s name. “Yeah, what is it?”
“You wanna see Phoenix?”
“You know I do.”
“For a whole weekend?”
“Wow, really?”
“Yeah. There’s an annual Easter weekend with my aunt and uncle. You want to go as my guest?”
She paused. This wasn’t exactly the intimate one-on-one she’d imagined. “So who’s going to be there? Besides your aunt and uncle.”
“My cousins.”
“Yeah.”
“My mom.”
“Oh, no! I’ve never met her. From what I hear she’s tough.”
“You want this chance or not?”
“Um, yes.”
“Pack light. We’re going on the bike.”
“On your motorcycle?” she shrieked.
“What do you think? That I’m picking you up on my high school ten-speed? Yes, of course, on my Harley.”
Orchid hung up the phone and started planning. What was she going to wear? Never mind that, what was she going to say? The thought of apologizing for hurting Phoenix with her callous remarks made her feel a little sick. Could he forgive her for being so thoughtless? She’d have to be brave because this might be her only chance.
An hour and fifteen minutes under a helmet was plenty of time for her carefully smoothed hair to grow damp and lifeless.
Orchid spent the time on the back of the bike hanging onto Caleb, and thinking about Phoenix. She imagined him with her. What adaptations would he use to operate a motorcycle? Is he driving himself today? When she’d asked Caleb about his brother, the taciturn twin’s answers were less than illuminating.
“He’s fine.”
She pictured how she’d greet Phoenix. Hurtling sixty miles an hour towards him, an epiphany gripped her; he needs reassurance that being with him is no compromise. That, despite my unthinking remarks at the hospital, I see nothing ugly in him.
Familiar streets passed by. They drove past the kitchenette where she and Phoenix had eaten and romped in the water last summer.
As Caleb slowed the Harley in front of the Victorian house facing the water, the plump woman Orchid had seen in pictures emerged from the house. The cousins whom she’d met on the Fourth of July, Harry and Stew, followed.
The woman tiptoed up to kiss Caleb on the cheek. “You beat your brother here,” she said.
“Well, there’s a first.”
Then she turned to Orchid. “Betsy,” she trilled. “Caleb’s aunt.” They shook hands.
Harry and Stew, finished greeting their cousin Caleb, came over to Orchid.
“Hey, stranger,” Stew said. “What, did you switch sides?”
“No switching sides . . . and don’t go starting that rumor. My big brother seems to have lost his mind, so we’re just trying to help him remember what he’s given up,” Caleb answered for her.
Orchid looked at him with gratitude, then turned to kiss both men on the cheek. “How’s your girlfriend?” she asked Harry, remembering his stories from their July Fourth outing.
“Lucy’s upstairs,” he responded. “She’s a talker, I’m warning you.”
While they chatted, Stew picked up Orchid’s bag. “I’ve got this,” he said.
“Thanks,” she said.
The house opened to a series of bedrooms and a laundry room on the ground level. Betsy pointed out the room she’d set aside for Phoenix, then led them to up two flights of stairs to a bedroom that Orchid remembered from the previous summer. While Stew deposited her bag and Betsy led Caleb down the hall to his room, Orchid looked out the framed window at the view she and Phoenix had admired together. Nine months ago, he’d cared for her here when she’d cut her foot. Now it was her turn.
CHAPTER 48
ICKY THUMP
Phoenix
SATURDAY MARCH 30
The street was visible from the main windows of the living room. Betsy and crew came outside soon after Phoenix pulled into their driveway.
He stepped out of the car, stiff from sitting for the last hour and a half. He was missing Dad, unsettled by an emptiness he couldn’t quite articulate.
His cousins Harry and Stew greeted Phoenix with half-hugs, back slaps and high fives. Aunt Betsy pointed at the open door to the ground floor. “I put you down here, as your mom requested.”
Just like Mom to make a big deal over me. Something about being back at the spot he’d last visited with Orchid, or maybe the increasing keen of physical discomfort, was making him irritable.
“Great, give me the gimp floor.”
“Well, you look wonderful.”
Phoenix grabbed his bag, then looked up to see Caleb bounding down the porch steps. At his elbow was a dark-haired beauty he wasn’t expecting to see. Her kohl-rimmed gaze darted to him then back to Caleb.
No freaking way! Caleb and Orchid?
Caleb paused on the stairs to place a hand behind Orchid’s back and whisper something in her ear. She listened intently then leaned her head against his shoulder. Even in her betrayal, she was gorgeous.
Thunderous denial boxed his ears. No, no, no. The whole son. The uninjured brother. The Walker who could walk. Of course. Caleb had what he didn’t. The inequity narrowed his throat until air molecules had to fight to enter single file.
Caleb split off to talk with Stew. Orchid approached. Phoenix eyed the bandage on her forehead, remembering his worry for her in the ambulance. He wondered how the wound was healing. Nope, don’t care. She searched his face, guilt in her expression. She looked sexy in a pair of shorts under a hooded jacket showing slender legs. His fingers curled around his suitcase handle, remembering the feel of her smooth skin beneath his hand. She has some nerve, showing up here with Caleb. They should at least have the decency to date behind my back.
“Phoenix,” she said, voice as soft as if it were only the two of them
together. “I’m so sorry. Last time we saw each other—”
Of course she’s freaking sorry.
“Save it,” he huffed, cutting her off. He wasn’t sticking around to hear more. Dragging his bag behind him, he stormed to the open door, calling over his shoulder to his brother. “That didn’t take you long, bud.”
Aunt Betsy hurried to follow him. She pointed down the hall to the first bedroom.
“Thanks,” he said, placing his overnight bag on the luggage rack in the closet.
“Do you need anything?”
“No, thank you.” he said, loneliness compressing in his chest. After all the women in his life, why was the treachery of this ebony-haired woman so painful?
“We’re heading to the beach for a stroll, then serving cocktails before dinner. Would you like to join us?”
“I’ll join you for drinks but pass on the beach.” He looked at his feet, fond memories of the shore battling the uncertainty of balancing in the sand on a stilt.
CHAPTER 49
ANOTHER WAY TO DIE
Orchid
“Not going well, huh?” Caleb asked Orchid, dropping next to the spot where she moped on the living room sofa. Her side of the cushion bounced up as if he’d sat on the opposite side of a seesaw.
Her voice quavered. “He doesn’t want to listen. I can’t even get three sentences out. I haven’t been able to apologize for what I said at the hospital, and I feel terrible about that. How could I keep making him mad?”
“It’s a tough situation.”
“He looks so good. He’s doing well, right?”
“Tough to say. He doesn’t really talk about it. But I don’t blame him for that. I’ve been there with him through all this, and I still don’t know how I’d react if it were me.”
“Me either. But I do know I’d want him with me every second I was in the hospital. I couldn’t imagine pushing him away. I’d be the most selfish person.”
“Maybe. But you know he’s strong. He probably thought it’d be too much for you.”
“Did you see how he looked at us when he arrived?”
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