Flawed (Blaze of Glory #2)

by Cherry Shephard

  “At his friend’s,” I tell her, taking her hand comfortingly.

  “No, not Zeke,” she corrects impatiently. “Troy.”

  “Oh,” I reply a little uncomfortably. “I don’t know,” I finish honestly.

  Her eyes narrow into tiny slits, and her voice takes on an almost demonic tone. “He won’t get away with this.”

  “Shan, babe,” Stone says as he walks back into the office.

  She rounds on him, her claws out and ready to attack. “Don’t you ‘Shan, babe’ me!” she yells. “It’s your damn fault he got out in the first place. If you’d just been able to control your fucking temper…”

  “Shannon,” Keets cuts in, raising his hands in surrender when she turns her venomous gaze his way. “None of us could have known this would happen,” he says, and I watch my older sister’s shoulders slump.

  “I know,” she replies quietly. “But I hate it.”

  “I’m so sorry, babe,” Stone comforts, going to his wife and holding her. “I had no idea that any of this would happen. You have to believe I would have done things differently had I known.”

  I almost feel like a voyeur as I sit on the bed, watching my sister and her husband. The love they share is evident, almost palpable. It makes me yearn for a love of my own. My eyes drift over to Keets, widening when I see him starting unabashedly at me. The expression on his face sets me on edge and I look away, unable to maintain the eye contact with him.

  “Are you okay?” Shannon asks me as she pulls away from her husband. “Did he hurt you in any way?”

  I shake my head. No, he didn’t hurt me. I just fucked him willingly in a moment of drunken lust. Now, I’m pregnant with his kid. Surprise! “No, he didn’t hurt me,” I say out loud.

  She nods slowly, seemingly satisfied with my answer. “Good,” she replies, gesturing to her husband to join us. “Nat, I’d like you to meet my husband, Staff Sergeant Ethan Stone. Stone? This is my baby sister, Natalie.”

  “Pleased to meet you,” he says in a low voice, engulfing my hand with his own. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

  “Ditto.” I smile weakly, removing my hand from his and wrapping my arms around my waist. I feel so out of place right now. These are my sister’s people, her friends and family. The only person I’ve really connected with in the room besides Shannon is Keets, and things there are rocky to say the least. “Where’s Zeke?” Shannon asks, looking around the office as though she expects him to pop out at any moment, clearly forgetting I’ve already answered her question.

  “He’s staying with a friend,” Keets says, looking at me a little strangely. I immediately check for a large pimple on my face, or a clothing tag hanging out. Why is he looking at me like that?

  Clearing my throat, I indicate toward the door. “I’m just going to go and put those glasses in the dishwasher,” I mumble, hurrying out of the office.

  After I finish loading the dishwasher, I step out the back and tilt my face up to the sky. It’s still pouring, and it takes just a second for my hair to become plastered to my head. I feel as though I’m stuck in limbo; part of me wants to stay, but the other part wants to run for the hills and never look back. I thought I could handle this, but I really can’t. How the hell am I going to tell my sister that I’m pregnant with her abusive ex’s child? Would it really matter that I didn’t know who he was? Would it really matter if I was so drunk I could barely even remember my own name?

  Somehow, I don’t think any of that would make a difference. A betrayal is a betrayal and, sister or not, I doubt even the good-hearted Shannon could see fit to forgive me for what I have done to our family. There’s no way I’m going to be able to keep it a secret from her, especially now that Troy is out of prison and knows exactly who I am. What does he even want? My hands clasp protectively over my stomach as a horrible thought occurs to me. What if he’s after my child? Our child? The thought makes me sick to my stomach, and is enough to make me double over in physical pain. I groan out loud, hot tears brimming in my eyes. I can’t do this…

  A warm, gentle hand on my back startles me, and I jump backward, my eyes wide. “Whoa, slow down there beautiful.” Keets chuckles. “I just wanted to come out here and check to see if you were okay.”

  “Oh.” I laugh breathlessly. “Sure, I’m okay. What’s going on?”

  “Shannon and Stone went home to see Zeke. They’re going to take over Saddles again tonight, so you’re officially off duty and free to leave.” He smiles.

  The smile fades from my own face as his words register in my mind. Leave? “I-is that what you want?” I stammer, watching him carefully.

  “It’s what you want, isn’t it?” he asks, and I nod.

  “Of course.” I smile again, patting his shoulder in a friendly gesture. “I guess I’ll start packing then.” I turn and start walking inside.

  “Natalie, wait,” he says, grabbing my arm and pulling me back toward and against his chest. I try to look up at him, but the pouring rain makes it almost impossible.

  Then he kisses me.

  This kiss is different from any he’s given me before. It’s almost… desperate. His tongue pushes past my lips and invades my mouth, and I love it. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I strain toward him, trying to get closer with every movement from our tongues. I recognize this kiss for what it is. This is goodbye.

  A few seconds later, I gently push myself away, cupping his cheek in my hand. “Take care of yourself, Keets,” I tell him with a smile.

  Turning, I walk back inside and quickly pack my bags, fighting back my tears the whole time. What was I expecting, for him to race in and stop me? Tell me he loves me? Get it together, Nat, I scold myself. This is for the best. How could I expect my sister’s best friend to want someone like me? I cut myself, I slept with my father’s murderer and sister’s abusive ex and I’m pregnant as a result.

  I’m flawed. Unwanted by everyone. No, the best thing for me is to just leave now, before I start to show too much, and never look back.

  Taking my bags out to the main bar area, I’m kind of surprised that Keets still hasn’t come back inside. Maybe he’s so happy to be rid of me that he no longer needs to put on the pretense. Now that I’m leaving, he doesn’t need to see or speak to me again.

  Maybe I can put the baby up for adoption when it’s born, I think to myself as I grab the bar phone to call a cab. Maybe no one ever has to know. Maybe…

  Suddenly, the bar door opens. I spin around, still clutching the phone, and freeze. “Well, well,” Troy drawls, stepping inside and crossing his arms over his chest as he stares at my bags. “Going somewhere, Natalie?”

  “Stay back,” I warn, holding the phone out like a weapon. “I’m warning you.”

  “You’re warning me?” Troy repeats with a laugh. “With what, a phone? You can’t really be that dense.” He shakes his head in mock amusement as he steps forward, a menacing smile fixed on his handsome face. “I just stopped by to give you this.” He pulls a white envelope out of his blazer pocket and places it on the bar, backing away with his hands raised in surrender. “I’ll see you in court.” He laughs, exiting the bar and slamming the door closed behind him.

  I give a loud sigh and slump against the bar, dropping the phone. “What the hell was that about?” an icy voice behind me demands. I turn slowly, my heart sinking when I see Keets standing there, still drenched from the rain. He’s never looked so sexy… or so angry.

  “Keets,” I plaster on a fake smile, trying to play it cool. How much did he hear? “I was just about to call a cab.”

  “I’ll bet,” he sneers, walking slowly toward me. All trace of the passion he shared with me earlier is gone, replaced by a mask of pure hatred. “Tell me, Natalie,” he says, stopping right in front of me. “How do you know Troy?”

  “Wh-what are you talking about?” I stammer, still desperately trying to play dumb.

  He scoffs and raises his eyebrows at me. “Really, Nat?” he asks, reaching out and stroking my cheek
lightly with a lone finger. I shiver involuntarily and he smiles. “You want to play this game? Shall we call your sister and ask her how you know Troy?” He turns and picks up the phone.

  “No!” I shriek as I lunge for it, but he holds it up high, easily out of my reach.

  “Right,” he says, his smile gone. “You’re going to sit down and start at the beginning. And if I think you’re leaving anything out, I will call Shannon.”

  I watch him warily as he takes a seat at a nearby table, stretching his long legs out. He looks cool, calm and composed, but behind his glasses I can clearly see a dark storm building in his eyes. My shoulders slump in defeat; I know he has me over a barrel. Taking a seat opposite him, I twist my fingers together in a worried knot.

  “Natalie.” His voice makes me jump.

  “I’m pregnant,” I blurt out, then immediately cover my mouth with my hands, my eyes wide with fright. Way to fucking go, Natalie. Let’s just jump in the deep end and get it over with.

  Keets sits up straighter in the chair, his eyes as round as saucers. “What—”

  “Don’t worry, it’s not yours.” I wave him off, figuring if I’m going to air my dirty laundry right here, right now, I may as well do it all at once. “It’s Troy’s. I’d just broken up with my boyfriend, Luke, and my friends took me out to a bar. I was drunk, he was handsome… I didn’t even recognize him.”

  Keets says nothing, just stares at me as I get up and start pacing around the table. “I mean, I know I should have said something, but what could I have said? ‘Oh, hey, I’m Shannon’s sister and I’m pregnant by her abusive ex who I later found out may have murdered our father? Get real,” I scoff. “You never would have looked at me, Shannon never would have spoken to me again…” I finally run out of steam and he still hasn’t said anything. I drop back in the chair just before he finally speaks, but it’s not what I want to hear.

  “Natalie,” he starts, his voice low and menacing. “I think you need to leave.”

  “Oh, don’t worry,” I say cheerfully, trying to mask the pain in my voice. “I’m leaving just as soon as I call the cab. I never planned to stick around. It was fun while it lasted, but I think we both knew this was never going to be a permanent thing.”

  A muscle ticks in his neck and I see him swallow hard. He’s clearly pissed off, but I just can’t seem to stop myself. “I mean, you’re hot and everything, but let’s be honest. There were things we were both hiding. You can’t have anything if you don’t have trust.” I pick up the phone and place a call for a cab.

  “I wasn’t hiding anything from you,” he grits out as I hang up, and I laugh.

  “Oh, please. Liz? You really think I didn’t know about her?”

  “Don’t you fucking dare talk about her!” he roars, pulling himself up from his chair and leaning over the table. “You think you know everything? You know nothing!”

  I shrink back a little in fear. I’m not sure what I was expecting; embarrassment, an apology, maybe even a little sheepishness, but not this. Not this pure rage. It’s as though someone has lit a fuse beneath him that’s been smoldering for years, and has only just started a fire.

  Whatever, I don’t even care.

  He stands there for a long time, saying nothing. His nostrils flare in anger and he rakes a hand over his short hair. Taking off his glasses, he places them on the bar and rubs his eyes with one hand. “You should be happy,” I say with a bright smile. Apparently I don’t know when to shut up. “At least you got laid a bunch of times. Liz not doing it for you?”

  He snarls and rushes at me. My hands fly up in surprise as he braces his hands on my hips and drives me backward until my ass bumps up against the mechanical bull on the other side of the bar. He picks me up effortlessly and balances me on the seat, roughly shoving my legs apart as he moves between them, thrusting his hard cock against me through his jeans. Fisting both of his hands into my hair, he drags my head back and stares wildly into my eyes. “Is this ‘doing it enough’ for you?” he asks sarcastically with a sadistic grin. I pale, but have no time to contemplate his words as his lips descend to my neck; biting, nibbling and sucking on the sensitive flesh. My hands roam over his chest and I clutch his arms, dragging him closer as he yanks my shirt up and feasts on my breasts. I groan as his teeth lightly graze against my nipple, sending shock waves pulsing through me. I grip his hair tightly as his hands move to my pants. Lifting me slightly, he shoves them down my legs and spins me around to face away from him. He bends me over the mechanical bull, and I cry out as there is a stinging slap against my bare ass.

  “You like that?” he growls, his hand roving unforgivingly across my skin. “You want more?”

  “Yes,” I groan, hating myself for it, but unable to resist. I gasp as he slaps my ass again, then his hand is between my legs, finding my clit and stroking it to a fever pitch. I hear the rasp of the zipper on his jeans, and I grab on to the leather seat of the bull, tears pricking at my eyes as I feel his bare cock slide forcefully inside me. “Yes,” he groans, and I glance over my shoulder to see him throw his head back, the veins in his arms and neck standing to attention. “Jesus, you’re so fucking tight. This is so much better than using a condom.” I cry out as he withdraws almost all the way, then slams back into me again. His hand goes around my throat as he pumps into me. “You like that, don’t you?” he growls. “You like what I do to you, the way I make you feel. He never made you feel like this, did he?”

  Tears slip down my cheeks as I realize what he’s doing. He’s literally trying to fuck the memory of Troy out of me. His hand fists into my hair and drags me back onto his cock, then he slips out and grabs my hand, dragging me down to the padding beneath the bull. Grabbing my hips, he pulls me over him and thrusts himself up and into me. This position is so much better for me, it allows me to move him how I need it. And I do. Rocking my hips back and forth, I lean back and rest my hands against his thighs as I stroke his cock with my pussy. My eyes close as his hand moves between us and strums my clit. “Fuck,” I hiss, sliding up and down along his length. I feel the pressure start low in my stomach, spreading all the way through me. He must sense it too, because instead of stopping, his fingers move faster on my clit until I’m pulsating around him. “Yes,” he groans. “Come on my cock.”

  I slump forward as the last bit of energy leaves my body, but Keets isn’t done yet. Slipping himself out of me, he picks me up in his arms, wrapping my legs around his waist as he carries me in to the office and stands me up next to the desk. “Fucking take it,” he says as he strokes his cock and I immediately sink to my knees and open my mouth. He fists his hands into my hair and guides his length inside. “Ahhh,” he gasps, throwing his head back as his thighs flex beneath my fingers. He pushes his cock in to my mouth so far that I gag and tears spring to my eyes. His hips thrust faster and I allow my lower to to go slack and stop sucking him as he fucks my mouth. I watch his face expression change to one of intense concentration and I moan as I realize he’s close to coming. He growls and pulls his hard cock out of my mouth. “Turn around,” he orders, and I obey, leaning forward to grip the edge of the table as he kicks my legs apart with his foot. I’m spread open for him, and he takes full advantage of it. Fisting his cock, he rubs it along the wet length of my pussy, tapping it firmly against my sensitive clit a few times. I cry out and I can swear I hear him chuckle right before he thrusts himself inside of me again. I try to stand up, but his hand on my back pushes me back down, face first onto the desk. “Stay fucking still,” he orders, hooking his forearms around my thighs and lifting them off the ground. I’m immobilized, suspended in the air as I’m forced to take every inch of his cock. I feel another orgasm approaching and I let out a low moan, giving myself over to the sensations that are coursing through me. It hits me hard and I scream as I tighten around him, milking him. This position makes it impossible to get away, I have to take everything Keets is giving me, until he’s satisfied. I feel his cum shoot deep inside me, his voice hoarse as he lets
out a loud shout of satisfaction. Our breathing is audible and harsh in the quiet office, and my legs shake as he slowly lowers them back to the ground. I stand up and turn to watch him as he walks straight out of the office without a word. Following him, I see him picking up our discarded clothes and he holds mine out for me. Braving the naked walk through the main bar, I accept the clothes and dress quickly. Not a word is spoken between us, in fact, things just got a whole lot more awkward. A horn sounds from outside, and I glance out the window to see the cab pull up. Looking back at Keets with a wry smile, I pick up my bags. “Well, it’s been an experience,” I say, holding out my hand for him to shake. His face is haunted, as though he’s not even in the room with me anymore. He makes no move toward me, so I shrug and walk out the door.

  It’s not until the cab is pulling away from Saddles with me in the back seat that I allow the tears to freely fall.

  KEETS

  I can’t believe she actually fucking left.

  Releasing a pent-up cry of rage, I sweep my arm across the bar, sending bottles and glasses flying. I don’t care about the mess, or about the cuts that pepper my forearm. She’s fucking gone, and like the idiot that I am, I let her go. I saw red when she brought up Liz. How did she even know about her? I know Shannon and Stone wouldn’t have said anything to her; they have more respect for me than that. My cock is still twitching as it remembers the way her pussy clenched around it just a few moments ago. It’s still wet from our mixed juices, and I don’t even care. I belatedly remember that I didn’t help her clean up before she left, then pull myself up short. She’s not your responsibility.

  Zipping up my jeans, I slump into the nearest chair. I rub my hands over my tired face, feeling as though I’ve just aged ten years.

  Pregnant. She’s fucking pregnant. With Troy’s baby. It’s as though the fates are laughing at me as they slap me in the face with reality. I’d allowed myself to be swayed by a pretty face; Natalie had been the perfect distraction from my depression. I didn’t even realize that it’s only one week until my fortieth birthday. Seven days until the anniversary of the tragic event that took my family from me. Just one hundred and sixy eight hours until I’m reunited with Liz. I can’t let anything else distract me from my goal.