by Kelly Oram
“Yeah, but I totally broke up NYCgirl with her boyfriend. I’m a relationship ruiner.”
“Sounds to me like you helped it. That relationship was doomed to fail, and NYCgirl wasn’t exactly upset about it.”
“I guess.”
I eyed my computer screen again, not sure how I felt about today’s responses. And people want me to be a role model? I couldn’t help but be skeptical.
“Okay, not to completely change the subject on you, but,” Robin said, her voice filled with unexplainable excitement. “I am dying to know!”
“Know what?”
“I overheard Isaac telling someone on the phone this morning that he went to dinner with you yesterday.”
I had to laugh at Robin’s giddiness. It reminded me so much of Cara.
“So?” Robin prompted. “Don’t leave me in suspense.”
I shrugged and tried my best not to blush. “He gave me a ride to the Not Everybody’s Doing It office yesterday, and when there was too much traffic to drive back he took me to dinner.”
“Wait, so then was it a date or not?”
“Um, well, I think maybe it ended up being a date. Maybe. He did say we should go out again sometime.”
Robin choked on a squeal. “And you’re going to go, right?”
“I don’t know.”
Robin’s face dropped. She was confused, but she wasn’t disappointed or disgusted with my answer the way Cara would have been. She smiled at me with concern. “How come? I think you guys would be adorable together. Don’t you like him?”
“Yeah, I guess I do. I like spending time with him, and it’s really easy to talk to him, but he’s so….”
“Intimidating?” Robin suggested curiously.
I thought about it, and while I did think he was a little intimidating, that wasn’t exactly the word I was looking for. I wasn’t scared of Isaac. He overwhelmed me. “He’s deep, you know? Serious. We have real conversations. It’s kind of intense. Zach was just the opposite—all fun and no depth.”
“Hmm. Well what if you didn’t go alone for your first real date? We could double, and then you could feel it out. Alan Russell owes me dinner since I bumped his story up to page two last week.”
Robin’s mouth snapped shut like she was embarrassed of her suggestion. Her cheeks turned rosy. “If you want to, I mean,” she said quickly. “You don’t have to though. I’d understand. You and Isaac are so popular there’s probably a hundred people you could double with.”
I was blown away by Robin’s self-consciousness. Isaac, yeah, I could understand—I feel the same way about him—but she was including me in his popularity when I’d always considered Robin and I to be social equals. I felt bad that she didn’t feel the same way. Somewhere over the last month she’d become my friend.
“I think a double date sounds like a great idea,” I said. “Of course, I might get impeached as senior class VP for doubling with people from the journalism department.”
After a good laugh, Robin and I agreed to see if Friday worked for our respective dates. I was so racked with nerves about having to ask Isaac out that I didn’t realize Cara wasn’t at school until first period was over and Stephanie found me in the hall between classes. “Hi Val. No Cara today?”
“Hi Stephanie,” I said, looking a bit startled as I realized that, in fact, Cara was not standing next to me. “I guess not.” I thought about it and then laughed. “She’s probably at home sleeping off a long night.”
“Sounds like someone had a lot more fun than I did,” Stephanie said.
I nodded. “I’m afraid to ask how much fun she had last night.”
“Well, since she’s not here, do you want to eat lunch with us today?”
“Um.” I was floored by the invite. “Sure.”
“Great! Is your next call down this hall?” Stephanie pointed the direction I’d been walking. When I nodded, her face brightened. “Good. Mine too. Walk with me.”
Before I could reply, Stephanie linked her arm in mine and began slowly making the trek toward her next class. “I want to hear about your jewelry. Isaac told me you get to design some stuff. That’s amazing. Congratulations.”
Stephanie is mind blowing. She’s one of those girls that are so popular you’re afraid to talk to her, but when you get to know her she’s surprisingly nice. Nothing like the stereotypical A-lister—Olivia Lewis. Olivia’s popular because she’s determined to make it so. Stephanie’s popular because everyone actually likes her.
When Stephanie said congratulations I could tell she was being sincere. And when she grinned at me and whispered, “He also told me you guys went on a date last night,” I could tell she was honestly pleased. It was hard not to feel comfortable with her.
“Let me guess,” I teased. “You want to hear the details.”
Stephanie looked insanely relieved that I was being playful with her. I realized she’d mentioned my date tentatively, as though she were feeling out friendship possibilities and was nervous that I wouldn’t let her in. When I did, she smiled a heartbreakingly beautiful smile and got every bit as giddy as Robin and Cara did.
“Oh, yes, yes, please! Isaac wouldn’t give me anything!”
I blushed. “There isn’t much to give. It was a spur of the moment thing and we were really just waiting out traffic. I’m not even sure if it was a date.”
Stephanie nodded gravely saying, “Isaac called it a date.” My heart fluttered with excitement to hear that fact confirmed. “But Isaac’s so reserved. He’s actually quite shy, you know—not the kind to kiss and tell. He told me you went out but that’s all I got. I can’t tell you how excited I was. He doesn’t date very often.”
I was surprised by Stephanie’s confession. Isaac shy? Isaac doesn’t date much? The more I thought about it the more I realized it was true. He was popular, and hung with the most popular kids in school, but I couldn’t remember ever seeing him with a girlfriend, and when he was with his friends he was always the quiet one. That was all part of his mystery. It’s what made him so ultra cool.
It also made his taking me out yesterday even more baffling.
I didn’t understand what was happening around here. Isaac Warren asking me out? Robin afraid I’m too popular to hang out with her? Stephanie nervous about being my friend?
It was like I’d stepped into an alternate reality where I was someone very, very popular. No, important. Wasn’t that the word Isaac had used? I couldn’t help feeling I didn’t deserve the attention. It was the same feeling I had when the Not Everybody’s Doing It ladies asked me to be their spokesperson.
I was drowning in the pressure of it all. I couldn’t be this person everyone seemed to think I was. Could I?
“This is me,” Stephanie said, stopping in the doorway of a classroom. “I’ll see you at lunch?”
“Yeah.” I shook myself from my thoughts and smiled. “See you then.”
My next couple classes went by in a blur and suddenly it was lunchtime. I knew it was ridiculous, but I was a little nervous to be joining Stephanie and all her friends for lunch. Especially when I hadn’t talked to Cara, my pillar of strength, all day.
I sank down to the floor against my locker and tried texting Cara one more time before heading to the cafeteria. I let out a deep breath as I waited to see if I’d get a response this time. Surprisingly, I did. Four of them in a row.
Sorry! Not ignoring you.
Didn’t have phone.
B there soon.
So much 2 tell U!
“Everything okay, Val?” I looked up to see Isaac studying me. His face gave nothing away about what he was thinking. “You look stressed.”
“A little,” I admitted.
Isaac gestured to the empty spot next to me. “May I?”
When I nodded, he joined me on the floor in the hallway that was becoming more deserted as people made their way to the lunchroom.
Isaac took my hand again like he’d done the night before and then looked at me as if to ask “
Is this okay?” I barely had time to smile before someone called out my name.
Zach was staring down at me with eyes as big as saucers. “You’re going out with him?” he asked incredulously. For a split second Zach looked hurt but he quickly replaced that look with a contemptuous glare. “Hoping he’ll pull your reputation out of the gutter? So now you’re a tease and superficial?”
“Come on man, that’s not cool,” Isaac said. “Lay off her.”
I appreciated it, but I didn’t need Isaac to come to my defense. “No,” I said to Zach. “Just hoping he’ll help me get over you.”
Zach looked surprised by my comment. I probably should have stopped there, but I was angry and still very much hurt by what he’d done to me.
“I like Isaac because he’s kind and considerate. You know what that is? It’s when you actually think about people’s feelings and care whether or not you stomp on them. You should try it sometime.”
“Me?” Zach said with an angry laugh. “If you cared about my feelings at all—”
“You. Broke. My. Heart!” I yelled, surprising all three of us. I started shaking with anger, and Isaac squeezed my hand. It felt so good to have him beside me right then.
“I thought I loved you,” I said to a stunned Zach. “I thought I could be honest with you. I thought you’d at least listen to me if I told you how I felt, and instead you dumped me before I could even blink. Then you hooked up with Olivia Lewis like the next day. In front of everyone! Everything I’ve done since we broke up I did so that maybe someday guys like you won’t be able to hurt people the way you hurt me.”
Zach didn’t have a comeback. He gaped at me a minute longer then turned his look of shock back into a glare and he stormed off.
“I’m sorry,” I said to Isaac who was sitting there very quietly. “I didn’t mean to do that in front of you. He just makes me so angry.”
I looked at Isaac, who had no idea what to do or say at the moment and smiled. “Thank you again for last night,” I said. “Thank you for understanding me.”
A feeling of gratitude washed over me right then so strongly that I leaned over without thinking and kissed Isaac. I could feel how surprised he was, but he quickly got over it and returned the kiss like he was more than happy to do so.
When I pulled away Isaac looked at me with one of those looks of his that seem to penetrate all the way to my soul. Whatever he saw there must have been okay because he said, “I wanted to do that last night, but I wasn’t sure you wanted me to.”
“I wasn’t sure I wanted you to last night either,” I admitted. “Whatever this relationship we have is, whether it’s friendship or something else, it’s more intense than what I’m used to.” I blushed and added, “It’s a little overwhelming.”
A brief smile flicked across Isaac’s face like he knew exactly what I meant and he said, “So…?”
He was leaving the decision of “us” up to me, but I still wasn’t quite sure what I wanted. “So….” I said. “What if we just feel it out for a while and see what happens? Robin Daniels and I were talking about going on a double date this Friday. Would you like to go with me?”
Isaac’s face brightened. “I’d love to.” He got up and held out a hand to me. “Now I think it’s time to go eat before lunch is over.”
“Good idea,” I said. “I hear there’s lasagna today. You never know. It could be better than Aunt Ani’s.”
Crossing the cafeteria holding hands with Isaac caused a bit of a stir. It wasn’t one of those clock-stopping, life-altering moments, but everyone watched us from the corner of their eyes and then whispered to the person next to them. Isaac seemed oblivious, but then Isaac is Isaac. He’s got to be used to being watched.
He dragged me over to his table and none of his friends were surprised to see me. Stephanie and Lacy had saved me a seat between them, but when they saw my hand in Isaac’s Stephanie scooted over so that I could sit next to him and that was that. It was business as usual at the A-list table. Business just included me now.
“She’s alive!” I teased when Cara finally called me. “I thought the dark side of the rock n’ roll VIP world might have sucked you under for good this time.”
“It just might,” Cara said. “Where are you?”
“School. Where are you?”
“School. Where are you more specifically?”
“The cafeteria. It’s lunch already, incase you failed to notice.”
“I’m in the cafeteria and you’re not—oh.”
She hung up.
“Was that Cara?” Stephanie asked.
“Yeah, I guess she’s all recovered from her wild night. I should go find her.”
“Val, you don’t have to go anywhere.”
“Yeah,” Lacy said. “She can join us if you want.”
“Ugh, does she have to?” Olivia whined. “She is so wretched. No offense, Val, but how can you stand her?”
“You guys talking about that drama chick?” Devon asked. “She scares me.”
“Me too,” Mason admitted.
“I think she’s hot,” Jeff said. “Hey, Val, hook a brother up?”
“Yeah, right Jeff,” Mason said. “That chick is way too much woman for you. She would eat you for breakfast.”
We all had a good laugh at that. I love that people are scared of Cara. I’m pretty sure Cara loves it too.
“Don’t hurry to come find me or anything,” Cara said appearing over my shoulder.
“I was just coming,” I said, still laughing a little. I patted the spot next to me where Stephanie had scooted down already. “Have a seat.”
When Cara didn’t sit I looked up behind me. Cara was eying my new group of friends, and for once she wasn’t showing any emotion on that overly dramatic face of hers. “Or, I could come with you,” I suggested instead.
Both Stephanie and Isaac tried to tell Cara she was welcome to stay, but I was sure Cara wanted to ask about my chosen seating arrangement today and she couldn’t exactly do it in front of everyone. “It’s all right,” I said standing. “We have lots of things to catch up on. I’ll see you guys later.”
Before I could leave, Isaac caught my hand. “Can I give you a ride home today?”
“On the motorcycle?” My heart jumped in my chest at the thought of climbing on behind him and holding tight all the way home.
Isaac laughed and said, “Be adventurous, Val. You’re good at that.”
“Well, when you put it that way.”
“I’ll meet you by your locker.”
“’Kay.”
Cara had the decency to wait until we were out of the cafeteria before pulling me to an abrupt stop. “Okay, dish the drama already. I’m dying. I almost couldn’t enjoy the party last night because I kept thinking about you. What happened? Obviously things went well. But how well? Are you guys together or what? I couldn’t tell. But it’s totally going that way isn’t it? Dang girl, I can’t believe you’re eating lunch with Stephanie DeWitt and driving home on Isaac Warren’s motorcycle!”
I couldn’t help myself and burst into laughter. I don’t know how she ever managed to contain herself before. “No, you first,” I insisted when I’d calmed my giggles. “I feel bad that I haven’t wanted to hang out with you and Shane much. I mean you know I don’t care for the whole party scene, and especially with Kyle and everything, but, still, Shane’s important to you. I should have gone with you last night, so, I’m sorry, and now I want you to tell me all about it. Were there any famous people there? How many dates did Kyle bring?”
Cara’s face lit up and she squealed. “There’s the V I know and love! Okay, first of all, Jimmy Eat World was there, which is more awesome than I can tell you, and secondly Kyle didn’t bring a date at all.”
“Really?” I hated that this news interested me, and I hated the way Cara cocked an eyebrow at me when it did.
“Nope, he didn’t bring anyone,” she said. “It’s a good thing too because he danced or made out with just about every girl t
here, and then took home some other guy’s girlfriend.”
“Nice.”
“Don’t worry, V. He still asked about you.”
“Oh, yeah? What’d he say?”
Cara looked worried for a second, or maybe guilty, and then changed the subject. Whatever Kyle had to say about me wasn’t exactly a compliment. Oh, well. That was probably for the best.
“Never mind what Kyle said. You know how you said you’ve been a lousy best friend lately, and that you totally owe me for not coming with me to the party last night?”
“Not exactly what I said, but, yeah?” I asked warily.
“Well…” Cara cringed. Whatever this was, it was going to be bad.
“Just spill it, already.”
“Tralse is filming a music video on Friday for Cryin’ Shame. They wanted me to ask you if you’d be in it.”
“Excuse me?”
“Val, it’s your song. Kyle wrote it for you. Now that you’ve been in the news, they thought it would be cool to have the real Virgin Val be in the video. Even their manager thinks it’s a really good idea.”
“Definitely not a good idea.”
“Think of the publicity you’d get. You’re about to launch your jewelry line and they want you to be wearing your necklace in the video.”
“Probably only my necklace. Cara that song is about him wanting me to give up my virginity to him.”
“I know! It’s perfect. The manwhore swooning over the virgin. It’s delicious.”
“It’s also not happening.”
“But V—”
“No buts. No. My answer is no. Not only no, but hell no. Somehow that would be like letting Kyle win.”
Cara sighed and I expected more of a fight but instead she smiled. “I told them you’d never go for it. Promised I’d ask, but told them you wouldn’t do it.”
“And that’s why I love you, C.”
“Don’t love me yet.”
“This can’t be good.”
“Well, I told them you’d never go for it in a million years, so Shane said that if you didn’t then I should. This morning I went to meet the guy who’s directing the video and auditioned for him. He said the part’s mine if I want it, but I told him I had to check with you first.”