I can’t help my smirk, and I decide to return the torment she’s been inflicting on me since the day we fucking met. I peel her shorts down slowly, but once they’re gone, there’s nothing covering her but her swimsuit bottoms, and I take in every perfect inch of her I can see.
“So beautiful.” The words fall out of my lips all on their own accord, and I press soft kisses to her stomach, loving her reaction as she arches toward my mouth.
I slide my lips over the top of her scar, her perfect imperfection, because though I hate the way she got it, it is a sign of her incredible strength – her resilience – and it’s as beautiful as the rest of her.
“You have no idea how much I’ve thought about this, baby,” I confess against her hot skin. I half think I’m dreaming, I’ve fantasized about this so many damn times.
“Oh God, Sam, please,” she begs, fucking begs, and it’s all I can do not to explode on the spot.
She writhes toward my mouth with need, and I have a thought. A suspicion, really. Because the way she’s pleading, the way her body is begging me as much as her words…
I pull back, just enough to meet her eyes.
“Rory… you’ve had an orgasm before, right?” I keep my voice gentle, not wanting to embarrass her, but if she’s only been with her ex, and he only ever hurt her during sex…
She blinks at me with wide, beautifully lust-filled eyes.
“He ever make you come?” I ask her. “Before it got bad, I mean? You ever make yourself come?” I watch her carefully, and I suspect I already know the answer, and somehow, it makes me even more aroused, if that’s even possible.
“I… I’m not sure,” she whispers, and I stare at her, astounded for a moment, before I recognize the opportunity in front of me.
You can’t not be sure. She’s either come before, or she hasn’t. And she hasn’t.
“Oh, baby, if you’re not sure, then you haven’t, trust me.”
I kiss her hungrily, feeling humbled and grateful. I hate that her ex did what he did, and I hate that he stole her virginity from her. Part of it is hypocritical, because I would very much like to have been the one to have that unfathomable honor, even though I am far from a virgin myself. But mostly, I hate the fact that she was robbed of the right to choose whom she gave that extraordinary privilege to.
But right now, Rory is choosing me. I’m taken with an overwhelming sense of humility, and I can’t help but be thankful for the opportunity in front of me. Because I can give her this first. I can give her pleasure she never even imagined. And fuck if I’m going to pass that up.
I lick and suck my way down her neck, peeling her bathing suit bottoms down her legs. I take a moment to take in the sight of the beautiful, libidinous creature before me. I can honestly say I’ve never seen anything more beautiful, anything sexier, in my eighteen years.
“Fucking beautiful,” I whisper in appreciation.
Inside my board shorts I swell to a painful state, and I push them off and toss them to the floor. I know I need to get inside her soon, before I lose my mind.
But not yet.
First I’m going to make sure she gets this experience, from me, and I know the best way to ensure she gets there.
The way she looks at me satisfies me deeply. I suck on the skin of her shoulder, which I’ve long wanted to taste, and I hear a small giggle above me.
I look up at her and raise my eyebrows. “You know, baby girl, laughter isn’t exactly what a guy wants to hear when a girl sees him naked for the first time,” I tease her.
She laughs again, and it’s such a goddamned beautiful sound. “I’m sorry,” she murmurs, but there’s still amusement in her voice.
“What is it, Ror? Come on, we’re naked, it’s definitely not time to get all shy on me.” I don’t know what’s suddenly got her all giggly, but as adorable as it is, I want her back to desperate, because I need her that way to take her to fucking heaven.
She looks a little embarrassed, but she answers anyway. “It’s just that… you’re… so much bigger than him.”
Well, hell.
Her words stroke my ego, mixing perfectly with my fervent desire to create the headiest feeling in the world. I’m pretty confident in this particular area, I have enough experience for sure, but Rory’s opinion is the only one that matters anymore, and I can’t help my wicked smirk.
“Now that is exactly what a man wants to hear,” I tell her. I love that she said it. I love that she didn’t say it to stroke my ego, but because she was honestly thinking it, and it fills me with renewed purpose.
I kiss my way down her chest, licking into her belly button and below, and kiss down her scar. The scent of her arousal invades my senses, making my hard-on jerk with impatience.
“You’re fucking perfect,” I tell her honestly, and then I kiss the inside of her thighs.
“Sam.”
She’s begging again. It’s like nothing I’ve ever heard, but she doesn’t need to, because I’m going to give her exactly what I’m not even sure she knows she needs.
I look down between her thighs, at the most perfect feminine form in existence, and breathe deeply, savoring the anticipation. This is as much for me as it is for her. Because I am fucking dying to taste her.
I peek up at her, making sure to read her eyes, just in case she’s having doubts, because it might kill me, but I swear to God, if she wants me to, I’ll stop.
“You trust me, baby?” I ask her. I think she knows what I’m about to do, and her adamant nod is incredibly gratifying.
I kiss her between her legs, just the way I’d kissed her mouth earlier, licking and sucking, and tasting as much as I possibly can.
“Sam!” she cries out above me, and it encourages me further.
I move my tongue in the right spot, finding the rhythm that makes her hips move with me.
I slide the hand that isn’t holding her open for me up her tense thigh, until I find my target.
Fuck, she’s so wet, and not just from my mouth. She tastes incredible, and I could feast on her all day. Vaguely I wonder if I’m enjoying this even more than she is, but her soft moans and whimpers above me tell me that I’m doing something right.
I slowly push two fingers into her, and I gasp at the perfect tightness. Her body sucks my fingers inside, and she clenches around me, trying to hold me there, and I grin against her.
I move them around in time with my tongue, slowly at first, and then faster and harder, until she’s fucking my mouth, and my fingers are giving it right back to her.
I relish her panting breaths, the way her body moves with me, and I lick and suck like my life depends on it, wanting to consume as much of her mind-blowing taste as I can.
“Fuck, Ror, you are so fucking sweet,” I growl into her body.
She pushes against me and her long strangled moan fills the room as she pulses and throbs against my mouth, her body contracting around my fingers so tightly that I nearly come on the spot.
Holy fucking fuck. It’s the most erotic thing I’ve ever seen, ever heard, ever felt. I feel like I’ve been transported inside every fantasy I’ve ever had, and some even my imagination couldn’t have fathomed.
I want to stop to watch her, but this is about her, so I keep doing what I’m doing, slowing gradually until the last bit of pleasure has been wrung from her body.
I carefully withdraw my fingers, and move over her, stroking them over her hot, flushed stomach, and watching her angel-face gasping for breath, eyes shut tight.
I’m brimming with pride. It flows through me, filling my ego until it’s big enough to burst. I feel like I’ve just achieved the world’s greatest accomplishment. Unbridled joy swarms my chest; I feel completely elated. I showed Rory what real pleasure feels like. No one else. Me. Because she chose me. And whatever happens with the rest of my life, I will always have this. I feel incredibly powerful in this moment, like I can do fucking anything.
But she’s the one with the real power, because she’s the o
ne who gave this to me, and I watch her, utterly riveted, until her eyes finally flutter open.
“Hi,” she whispers, and I give her a cocky grin; I can’t help it.
“Hi,” I say back, and then kiss her with everything I feel – all of the love, all of the power, all of the insane desire burning in every cell of my body.
I climb over her, still kissing her, and she wraps her legs around me, pulling me right where I want to be, and a deep groan of pleasure makes its way up my throat and fills the room.
But I have a sudden fear that we’re moving too fast. What if I push her too far? I’ve never been one to take it slow, but then, I’ve never had a relationship. What’s the point of waiting for sex when the whole point was sex? But everything is different with Rory, and we only kissed for the first time less than twenty-four hours ago. What if this isn’t right? Even though it feels so fucking right.
“We can wait, Ror,” I tell her. “I can do that again, if you like.” I can’t help my smug smirk, because I could spend the entire afternoon making her come with my mouth over and over again, and never get bored.
“No, Sam,” she whispers, her voice hoarse with renewed desire, “I want you.”
God, I never much cared for girls who were talkers in bed, because most of the time, it’s fake as hell. But Rory – every word she says, every sound she makes, is fucking real, just like the rest of her, and I’m desperate for anything she wants to tell me, any sigh or whimper, because it has as much of a physical effect on me as her touch.
She grinds her hips against me and I nearly lose it. My head flies back and I grunt into her neck. “Fuck.”
Control. I need to stay in control.
I meet her eyes, trying to figure out the right thing. If I should just take her word for it, or if we should be waiting. That’s what they say, right? That the best things are worth waiting for? She’s worth waiting for; I know that. I could wait for her. I just need to know for sure that she’s doing this right now, like she said, because she wants to, and not for any other reason. Not because she thinks it’s what I want. Because although it certainly is, respecting her, making sure she’s truly ready for this when we do it, is what I really want more than anything, even this.
“Sam, if I didn’t want to be here with you right now, I wouldn’t be here with you, okay?” she says meaningfully. And I believe her; I do, I’m just worried that after everything she’s been through, maybe I should make the call to wait anyway.
I consider her, weighing my jumbled thoughts, because right now, I’m more turned on than I’ve been in my life, but it’s more than that. It’s an emotional need to be as close to her as possible, to be connected to her, in her, and I try to figure out if she’s feeling the same thing.
“Please,” she begs again, as if she knows exactly what hearing it does to me. “I need you, Sam. Inside me.”
Yeah, I’m done.
I slam my eyes closed, because those words in her voice are too much, and looking at her at the same time, that will make the choice for us, because I’m going to lose it like a virgin in a whorehouse before I even get the chance to give her what she wants.
“God, Ror, if you’re going to say things like that, I’m barely going to make it inside you, baby,” I tell her, my voice so desperate I barely even sound like me.
“Well then don’t make me ask you again. Are you really going to make me beg you after last night? You know I have more bathing suits like that one to torture you with,” she jokes, but her words finally get through to me.
I’ve lost my goddamned mind. Rory is naked below me, literally begging me to take her, and I’m making her wait.
I jump off the bed to get a condom.
“I’m on the pill.” Her voice hypnotizes me. I stare at her. “And they, um, tested me in the hospital. After… you know. I’ve never been with anyone else.”
“I trust you, Rory.” She’s got to be kidding me. As if the thought she had anything even crossed my fucking mind. “And just so you know, I’ve never not worn a condom. Not once.” It’s true.
Rory nods, but I’m still frozen. The reality of what she’s telling me is too much. I want inside her so badly I can’t think of a single thing I wouldn’t do to have her right now, but the thought of being inside her bare… with nothing between us, it makes my breath catch.
When I can’t make myself move, Rory grabs the condom packet and tosses it away.
Holy fuck.
This girl is amazing. I’m in love with her, and I’m about to do what I’ve wanted to do since I first saw her, and without even the slightest barrier. I’ve never even considered it – safe sex is something that has been ingrained in me since I hit adolescence. But now that the idea has been planted, I’m overcome with a sense of excitement I never even imagined.
I move back over her and kiss her and kiss her and kiss her. I don’t have the balls to say the words I’m thinking, so I push them into my kiss as I position myself to take her.
But I need to watch her.
I pull back so I can see her eyes, silently asking for her certainty one last time. She gives it without a word.
I push slowly inside her, never taking my eyes off hers. She moans softly as I fill her, careful to go slow. She’s so fucking tight that if I didn’t know her history, I would suspect she was a virgin, and her body both resists and accepts my invasion simultaneously.
She lifts her hips as if to hurry me up, but I’m going slow for myself as much as her. I don’t want this to be over too soon, and she’s like nothing I’ve ever felt before. Hot, slick, tight – like she’s sucking me – and without a barrier, it’s even more intense.
I can’t help my loud groan as I meet the end of her, and I stop to let her get used to me. I fear she must be uncomfortable – she’s so fucking tight – and I’m terrified of hurting her. She’s only ever been hurt from this act, and I want this to feel as good for her as it does for me, though I’m not sure that’s possible.
I know it isn’t easy for girls to come from penetrative sex, especially if they’re inexperienced. It’s why I made sure to go down on her first, but I’m up for the challenge. I want this to be good for her. I want to hear her moan again. I want to hear that strangled, breathy version of my name in her voice.
“You okay, baby?” I ask her, but she lifts her hips again, as if she wants more.
“God, yes, Sam. Please, move,” she pleads.
Well fuck if she’s going to have to ask me twice.
I withdraw halfway and push myself back in, fully aware that she’s too small for me, or just the right size, depending on how you see it. We moan together. She feels like fucking heaven.
It’s never been like this before. I’ve never been so present. I’m not racing toward the end I know will feel better than anything, but embracing every moment, savoring it.
I pick up speed, but continue to watch her carefully, ready to slow at the first sign of discomfort, but it doesn’t come. All I get is encouragement, and she moves with me so perfectly it’s impossible to doubt our bodies were made for one another. I push myself deep, wishing I could go even deeper, but her body is taking everything it can, and giving me everything back.
I kiss her with all of the lust and love in my body and soul, and her thighs tighten around my hips.
I murmur how good she feels, how tight.
“Fucking God,” I groan right against her throat.
Sex is always good. It’s been my favorite thing to do since I lost my virginity to a junior when I was fourteen. But this… this is something different. It isn’t just the lack of a condom. Although feeling her wetness, her heat – It’s fucking mind-blowing. But it’s the way we connect, the way we just get each other in this visceral way, that even as I get too lost to keep a conscious watch over her reactions, my body knows exactly what she wants, what she needs.
“Sam…” Rory lets out a deep, breathy moan, and it brings my orgasm right to the surface.
No girl I’ve ever ho
oked up with has called me Sam. I’ve always been Cap, and the name is singularly Rory’s, and it makes the experience even more special.
But I can’t come yet. Not before her. So I try to numb my mind from all of the sensations, the sounds, the sight, because it’s all too fucking much.
She grips my hair hard, and it feels so fucking good. Her body is gripping me too now, choking me, and I know she’s close, and I feel a blazing determination driving me toward my goal.
I pull away from her mouth, needing to see her, but her eyes are clenched shut.
“Look at me, baby,” I whisper, and she does.
Her eyes are glazed over with lust, and my face is so close to her that the only air I breathe comes from her gasping exhales.
I would do fucking anything for this girl. I would kill for her – I know it without question. I fucking love her. I love her more than anything.
Her fingers clutch at my back, as if she’s trying to pull me closer, deeper, but I’m as close as I can physically get, and just as deep. I move harder, faster, and she keeps up pace.
“You’re so fucking beautiful, Rory,” I tell her, groaning with almost every thrust now. I need her to get there. Soon. “Fuck, baby.”
Suddenly her hips move erratically, and I thrust hard and deep, following her lead, knowing I’m not going to last much longer.
“Baby…”
“Oh my God, Sam…”
And I do feel like a God. Like I’m all-powerful. Seeing her like this, being the one to take her there, makes me feel as if I’m completely omnipotent, like there’s nothing I can’t do.
She moans my name again and I kiss her. I slide my hands under her perfect little ass, squeezing my fingers and pulling her to me and I thrust myself as deep as I can go.
She screams some crazed version of my name, and I feel it. Her body seizes with pleasure, her limbs tightening around me as the tightness inside her grips me with a force like nothing I’ve ever felt – like a fucking vise. She rakes her nails down my back and it’s all too erotic. She shoves her hips into me in a random rhythm, but the last of my restraint exploded with her release, and I come deep inside her, filling her with my own.
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