by Pat Tucker
Low on cash and anxious to land Cooper a gig, I figured I’d use the hunger as fuel to push forward. I knew I was closer than ever.
Silly of me to have thought that arriving at the club to meet Big Al early would be a problem. There was lots of activity surrounding the place as I got out of my car and headed for the door. That gave me hope and made me feel like landing this gig would finally make Cooper hopeful and happy. It would show him that I was fully capable of managing his career and may even inspire him to take a more active role.
As I approached, I watched two men unload a delivery truck. The moment they realized I was there, they stopped and stared until I came closer.
“Hi, I’m here to see Big Al,” I greeted. It was awkward the way they stared as I walked.
It took a minute before they spoke, so I wasn’t sure whether they had heard me.
“He expecting you?” one man finally asked.
“Yeah, he told me to come by this afternoon.”
“Oh, okay; well, he’s not here yet.”
My heart sank. The expression on my face must’ve said so, because the guy started patting his pants’ pockets and looking around.
“Well, now, hold on a minute, let me call him and find out his ETA. I don’t want you getting all upset.”
“Oh, no, it’s nothing like that. It’s just I’ve had a long day, and this is my last meeting before I’m able to wrap it up.” I tried to offer a smile, but I was sure it came across weak and flat. I was hungry and tired. The last thing I wanted to hear was that Al forgot about our meeting after he’d insisted I come by today. I really needed to get this gig for Cooper.
Nearly two hours, and three Cokes later, I sat at the back bar section and still waited. If I had anything else going, I would have left long ago. But this gig would do so much for Cooper and for me. Maybe it would stop him from threatening to replace me.
The ruckus and loud noises going on around me didn’t faze me much after hours of waiting. I was frustrated, and I needed Al to come on, so I could grab something to eat.
I looked around the club and had to remind myself that the big picture was what’s important.
Milan’s color scheme made the place seem busy even when it was nearly empty. There were several sections, but no continuity in the décor, setup, or design. The back bar, where I sat, was done in blue tones with lime-green walls on either side. But then the DJ section had multicolored patterns on the walls, with red cocktail tables and high chairs.
The T-Lounge and the On the Nile sections made me wonder what the place would look like at night. I had been there too long if I’d started questioning the décor and trying to make sense of the place’s design. Big Al needed to hurry.
“He must have the live bands over there,” I muttered to myself as I looked around. The place was large, but it was old and in need of several upgrades and renovations.
There were zebra-patterned seats, mixed with odd-looking backdrops as walls. Honestly, it looked like someone had found a bunch of mismatched items, thrown them into the large spaces, and called it a club. The venue was far from the upscale surroundings I dreamed of, but still, I waited.
From the moment I’d pulled up outside, I’d convinced myself that none of that would matter if I could get Cooper to perform there as a mainstay. I wouldn’t give a damn if the walls had polka-dot and stripes as long as we could call it our musical home.
“You must be Felicia,” said a voice so deep, that it gave me the chills. A man’s voice did it for me. Some women liked height, some liked weight, and some liked the eyes, but for me, it was all about the voice.
I stumbled as I got up from the high barstool I’d been perched on for nearly three hours and extended a hand. He looked down at me and my hand but couldn’t accept it because both of his were full.
He motioned with his head. “C’mon back here to my office.”
Al was a big man with a commanding presence. I imagined he shopped at one of those Big and Tall stores. He wore a Kangol Bamboo Ivy cap turned backward, an Oxford shirt with paisley detailing, and a pair of jeans with a starched crease.
It had been a long time since I’d seen a man wear jeans with a crease. Outside of his dated appearance, and even the fact that he literally could change our lives, at that moment, what excited me most was the plastic bag he carried with the other stuff.
The aroma from the chicken woke my senses and made my stomach grumble with pain. Since I hadn’t eaten, my stomach was on high alert. I hoped he didn’t hear the sound or see the hunger in my eyes for both the food and the gig.
“You want some Frenchy’s? I ain’t had lunch yet,” he said as he sat behind a desk that was larger than his body.
“Oh, my God! I’m so hungry! You sure you wouldn’t mind?”
It wasn’t professional, but neither were the pictures of half-naked women plastered all over the walls in Big Al’s office.
At that point in my reminiscences, I must have drifted off to sleep.
Chapter Eleven
It was close to midnight when my eyes fluttered open. I was instantly frustrated; waking at that time of night, I wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep. I had no idea how long Yesterday and my mother had stayed in the hall arguing with my landlord, and I didn’t care. They were gone, and that was all that mattered to me.
When I looked at my cell phone and noticed several missed calls, the only one that threatened to send me into full cardiac arrest was the one from my son.
Trey rarely called, and here I had missed him when he finally had. My heart sank at the thought. I put my face into my palms and cried. Cooper didn’t even have the decency to make sure our son stayed in touch with me. It was like he’d stripped me of everything that meant anything, and he was okay with it.
In the rare moments when Trey called, he never had much to say to me. I had known how unfair life could be for a very long time, but I never expected things to turn out the way they had after Cooper left. My son was a complete stranger to me, and it hurt that I couldn’t do much about it.
It was hard to go from a full house to being alone. Over the last couple of years, I’d struggled with the adjustment, but now that I had to see Cooper’s likeness and listen to his voice, it was like reliving the betrayal and breakup all over again.
“What time did he call?” I muttered as I scrolled through my phone’s call log. When I realized he had called around 7:30, I hated myself even more. I hadn’t heard the phone when it rang.
But the truth was, if I had heard it, I wouldn’t have answered. I was trying to ignore calls from Yesterday and my mother, and I never expected to hear from my son.
There was nothing I could do at midnight. I didn’t turn on the TV. I lay in the dark and stared at the ceiling. My hope was that I’d fall back to sleep. Instead, my mind was busy with thoughts of the past.
Two weeks after my initial meeting with Big Al, I hadn’t heard back from him, and I felt like a complete failure. Cooper and I went there one Friday night, and I hated that I’d even taken him. The frown that invaded his features, when I pulled into the parking lot, never left his face. He found everything wrong with the club and the people there, and what he didn’t find, he complained about anyway.
“This place needs to be shut down, completely demolished, then maybe they can reopen, once they’ve upgraded and rebuilt,” he said as he looked around.
I wanted to remind him that no one had asked what he thought. Lately, nothing had been good enough for Cooper. He found fault in everything, and I wondered whether I’d be able to please him.
“You wanted me to perform here?” By now, his face was so squinted up, it was as if his senses were under attack from a foul scent.
I shot him a glance that he ignored as he ranted on. It would’ve started an argument if I’d pointed out that he wasn’t performing anywhere currently, so this would be an actual ste
p up, but I didn’t say so.
As he looked around and criticized the setting, the music, and even the wait staff, my eyes and focus were on looking for Big Al. He was nowhere to be found.
My plan was to introduce him to Cooper as I knew the two would hit it off. I wasn’t sure why Al hadn’t called back, but I needed to make some progress.
“You guys okay over here?”
The waitress was an older lady who looked like she was losing the battle with aging. The wig she wore was lopsided, and her makeup looked stale.
“I’ll take another Heineken,” Cooper said, then he motioned to me. “You having another drink?”
That was code for me to say no. We were always on a tight budget. I didn’t mind because when Big Al came in, I wanted to be sharp, so I could hammer down something tangible for Cooper. We needed the gig.
That night, Big Al was a no-show, and Cooper had not been impressed. It would be two more weeks after that, before I finally heard back from Big Al.
Yesterday and I were out at the mall when the call came in.
“Aey, this is Al,” was all he said.
He behaved as if he hadn’t seen a ton of missed calls from me. I hated when people ignored you for no reason at all, then circled back like nothing happened, and failed to even acknowledge your efforts to reach out. I wanted to scream at him and ask if this was how he conducted his business. But instead, I simply said, “How are you?”
“Can you come by the club?”
I wanted to ask why. I wanted to ask whether he had decided to let Coop sign. I wanted to ask or say a lot, but instead all I said was, “when?”
“Come in the next couple of hours. I’m headed that way soon.”
Thoughts of how he kept me waiting the first time flashed through my mind, but still, I didn’t complain. I felt like any cross word to him would taint his decision about Cooper, and I couldn’t take that chance.
I hadn’t developed a single lead in the time I waited to hear back from Al. Cooper still had no chance of landing a residency anywhere, and it was frustrating.
Cooper’s impatience seemed to grow by the day. Nothing I was doing was fast or good enough as it related to his career. I couldn’t tell him, but I never imagined it would be as hard as it was. Since I had no connections, and didn’t know any of the right people, it felt like we were stuck.
“I’m out with a friend now,” I said.
Yesterday looked at me with curiosity all over her face. But she didn’t need to get the scoop until I was ready to give it.
“Come alone,” was all he said before he hung up.
“Who was that?”
“This club owner who keeps stringing me along. I’m trying to get Cooper a weekly gig there, but he acts like he can’t return a call.”
“Umph, shiesty,” Yesterday said.
Deep down, I knew she was right. All the signs pointed to a man who lacked professionalism, was probably shady beyond words and more than a little dangerous, but I needed his help.
“Listen, let me drop you at the nail shop, then swing by his place. By the time you’re done, I’ll be back to scoop you.”
“You do get that we were supposed to be spending the day together, right?”
“I know, but I really need to get this gig for Cooper. He’s already on my ass about the little family-reunion type stuff I’ve booked. I need something big, and this could be it.”
Yesterday looked up one direction, then down the opposite as we stood outside of Victoria’s Secret.
“Okay, let’s go,” she said.
She was cool to let me drop her off, so I could rush over and beg for work for Cooper. As I drove like a crook running from police, my mind raced with all the things I could say to try and nail down something solid from Al. I needed to get him to commit to something even if it was only a one-time performance.
This time when I pulled up outside the club, the scene was different. The parking lot looked deserted, and there was hardly anyone hanging around. Even the workers were scarce.
If music hadn’t been blaring from the door that sat ajar, I would’ve expected to wait on Al again. But I knew he was inside.
When I walked in, it took my eyes some time to adjust to the sudden darkness. The cool air was refreshing, but the place smelled like stale liquor and cigar smoke.
“Hello, Al? You in here?” I called out.
I didn’t want to surprise anyone, and I didn’t need any surprises.
“Aey,” he said as he stepped into the doorway of his office toward the back of the club.
The hallway looked darker than the rest of the building. Big Al pointed to his earpiece, indicating he was on the phone, then beckoned me toward the back with the wave of a hand.
“Yeah, Playboy, that sounds about right.”
He pointed at the chair in front of his desk and I sat down. As he talked on the phone, I tried to think of exactly what I would say to convince him to let Cooper play his club. Suddenly, everything I had rehearsed in my head on the drive over was gone. I was nervous. He was important in the nightclub industry, and he could possibly lead me to other gigs for Cooper.
“Bet that,” he said into the phone.
As he talked, his eyes seemed stuck on me. Being beneath his deep penetrating glare made me feel even more uncomfortable, but I wasn’t about to back down. I was determined to leave there with some kind of commitment. It had taken too long to get him face to face. Since he rarely returned calls, I felt like I needed to make the most of the rare opportunity.
“Okay, well listen, dawg, I gotta go. I’m sitting here bullshitting with you, but a fine young thang is waiting on me, and I don’t know how much longer she’s gonna wait.”
That description took me by complete surprise.
The fact that he said it in my presence left me baffled. I don’t think anyone had ever referred to me as a “fine young thang.” Suddenly, a different type of nervousness flooded my system, and I wasn’t sure how to adjust.
Time wasn’t on my side, either. Big Al ended his call, then leaned back in his large chair, and focused his razor-sharp stare on me.
“So, did you get a chance to listen to Cooper’s demo?”
I nervously jumped right into business, thinking I could steer the conversation in the direction I wanted.
He didn’t respond; he just continued to stare. I prayed that my nervousness wasn’t as obvious as it felt. When the sweat rolled down the middle of my back, I wanted to throw in the towel, but I knew I couldn’t.
Finally, he spoke, but it wasn’t what I expected him to say.
“Come over on this side of the desk,” he said. He patted a space close to him. I hesitated.
I swallowed dry, but I knew Al probably wasn’t the type of man who waited long.
My legs felt unsteady as I stood. That might have been the first, but it certainly wasn’t the last time I had to give something in order to make things happen for Cooper.
Chapter Twelve
I walked into the house, stripped naked, and headed straight for the shower. With the water as hot as I could stand it, I stood underneath a constant downpour that couldn’t clean me no matter how long I stood there.
Those memories would never go down the drain. I closed my eyes, and it was like Big Al was touching me all over again.
“You like that?” he’d asked as he squeezed one of my nipples through my bra.
I didn’t want to admit it, but it felt really good. My body responded to him before I could find my words. Our eyes had locked.
When I’d nodded, he’d pounced.
Big Al had pushed me back onto his desk, pulled up my blouse and hungrily attacked my nipples. At first, he had cupped my breast and suckled like it was filling his thirst. He had wet my skin, pulled back and allowed the air to hit it, driving me to the edge. I didn’t want t
o like it, but my senses took over, and soon, there was so much heat and pleasure coming from his touch, I thought I might lose it and scream in ecstasy.
In the beginning, I had scolded myself for falling so easily, but the minute pleasure took over, it was like my morals and professional principles abandoned me.
When I’d tried to back up so that I could take the bra off, Al had stopped me.
“No, leave it on. Just hike up your skirt.”
I felt like a horny teenager doing something wrong. He had cleared a little space on the desk, but for the most part, every time I’d moved, something fell to the floor. Al wasn’t the least bit bothered. He’d kept his eyes on me as his hands explored my body. He wasn’t gentle, and I didn’t mind. There was no love or warm feelings involved.
“Damn, you’re so wet; that’s what’s up.”
With two thick fingers, he’d fingered me for a few minutes, then dipped his head between my thighs and used his tongue to separate my lips. My body had pulsed with hunger as he’d touched me. The more he’d touched, the more I’d wanted. It was the most pleasurable tease I’d ever encountered.
“Shiiiit,” I’d managed. I’d bit down on my lip to try and suppress what I’d wanted to say.
He’d spread my legs wider, licked and sucked me so hard, my panties that had been snatched to the side, kept slipping between his tongue and my swollen flesh. The sensation was amazing. I’d closed my eyes and allowed my mind to enjoy the pleasure my body enjoyed.
“Oh, my.” I couldn’t control it. I was being swept away, and I’d decided to let go.
Suddenly, everything had stopped. I’d opened my eyes to see him looking down at me.
“I wanna fuck you.”
“I want you to,” I’d admitted breathlessly. All shame had exited my body, and I was alone.
Big Al had unzipped his pants and allowed his massive dick to tumble out. My eyes had grown wide at the sight of his size.
“Whoa!” I’d licked my lips instinctively.
“Yeah, that’s the reaction I get with this.” He’d stroked himself and motioned for me to come closer. Mesmerized by the sheer size, I could hardly move.