Seared by Desire

by Jennifer T. Alli

  They had finally reached the end of the staircase, the long path ending in a short corridor. At the end of the hall there was a single door, guarded by two pale skin vampires. I guess that explains the need for darkness, she decided.

  Sara smiled at the guard though she doubted he could see the gesture. Two single torches lit the small space illuminating the area around the door and little else. “Thank you,” she breathed. “I know that you didn’t want to bring me here but thank you for doing so. When Lucian gets better I’ll make sure you don’t get in trouble for your actions.”

  He sighed in relief. “Thank you my Lady. Thank you. I thought that Lord Lucian would kill me for certain for disobeying his order.”

  “I promise he won’t. I have to go. I need to see him.”

  “Of course my Lady.”

  She rolled her eyes, resigning herself to an uphill battle with the citizens of the estate and their insistence on using honorific titles instead of her given name. The prospect of seeing Lucian filled her with confidence and she strolled towards the guards, determined to see him.

  “Open the door,” she ordered; trying to make sure her voice was filled the same authority that Lucian's was when he commanded his troops.

  “Lady Sara, you’re not meant to be here.”

  “I said, open the door.”

  “Lady Sara, we’re on strict orders to defend this door. Please, go back upstairs.”

  “I’m not going anywhere until I see Lucian. I’ve said this before; I’m not going to hurt him. You have to know that.”

  “We never thought you’d hurt him. The Lord trusts you with his life.”

  “Then what exactly are you defending? Look,” she groaned in exasperation. “You’ve just said it yourself, Lucian trusts me with his life. So I’m sure he’s not going to mind if you let me in to see him.” They still looked reluctant and increasingly frustrated, Sara resorted to the same tactic that had allowed her to see him in the first place. Fire crawled over her skin, popping and cackling as it spread further and further into the air surrounding her. “You either open this door or I open it as I step over your charred remains. Believe me, it gives me no pleasure to do this but I’ll do whatever I have to in order to see him.”

  A silent look passed between the two men before they stepped aside exposing the door to her. The flames died quickly as she rushed past them and threw open the door. “Lucian,” she cried happily.

  Her joy was short lived. Lucian lay as still as death against dark sheets, white bandages covering most of his body. The short distance that separated them disappeared in an instant as she flew to his side, her hands running over his body assessing the degree of his wounds. Her heart skipped a beat when she came into contact with his icy skin. While Lucian was usually cool to the touch, nullifying her heat with his own chill now he was like ice. Her heart stopped all together when she placed her hand over his heart and found no heartbeat. Frantic, she lifted his wrist, trying desperately to find a pulse.

  Tears in her eyes, she turned back to the guards at the door. “Is he dead?” she sobbed. “He’s dead and no one told me! What were you hoping to achieve?!” she shrieked angrily.

  One of the guards stepped hesitantly into the room, holding out his hands in a symbol of peace. “He’s alive Lady Sara.”

  “He’s dead!” she screamed. “His heart isn’t beating and he has no pulse. He’s dead.” The strength left her body abruptly and her shoulders slumped in defeat as she clutched his cold skin tightly.

  “He’s alive Lady Sara,” the guard repeated. “I promise you. He’s just sleeping.”

  “I’ve slept with him before, his heart beats when he sleeps. Don’t lie to me.”

  “He’s entered a deep sleep my Lady to conserve his strength. He’s alive, I assure you. If he weren’t, would we be guarding him?”

  His words sunk in slowly but when they did her racing heart began to calm, Lucian was alive, he had to be, she wouldn’t accept an alternative. She turned to look at him, the blue from her burning eyes so intense that he had difficulty maintaining eye contact. “So how do I wake him up?”

  “I don’t know my Lady.”

  “What do you mean,” she hissed, “you don’t know?”

  “It’s rare for any vampire to put himself into a deep sleep, there’s a risk that you may never awaken and only two things can make you rise, thirst or someone else knowing the exact method to force your eyes to open. Lord Lucian's sleep is too deep for thirst to make him wake, we need the other and I don’t know what it is. What will make a vampire wake from a deep sleep differs from person to person and Lord Lucian didn’t tell me his secret.”

  “So who will know?”

  “He was brought here by Commanders Gareth and Russell, they might know.”

  Her eyes wandered back to Lucian's still body, her decision made. “Fine,” she groused. She stood from her position on the floor beside him and removed his thick overcoat from her shoulders before slipping into bed beside him and covering them both as best she could with the heavy material. “When they rise, let them know that I’m here, waiting.” She pulled Lucian's body close, ignoring the chill of his skin, simply glad to see him again.

  “Of course my Lady.” The guard bowed as he walked back to his post, closing the door quietly behind him.

  ******

  “This is ridiculous,” Gareth cursed as he made his down the stairs to the chamber where Lucian slept.

  Ever the voice of reason, Russell rushed to head off the hasty plan he knew was forming in Gareth’s mind. “This is what Lord Lucian asked us to do, we have to obey his orders.”

  “He gave this command when he was half delirious from blood loss,” Gareth countered. “Surely that can’t count. He’s putting his life at risk, endangering the continuing prosperity of our people all for the sake of one woman. He was clearly not in the right frame of mind when he told us to do this.”

  “And what would you have us do then Gareth? Would you have us bring Sara down here now and force Lord Lucian to drink?”

  “Yes!” he crowed triumphantly. “That’s exactly what I’d have her do.”

  “Don’t be ridiculous Gareth, Sara has to recover. If he drunk from her now he could kill her and trust me when I say that if he killed her our leader would never recover, he’d be broken inside not to mention that he’d have to ensure he never sustained another injury in his life.”

  Gareth sighed loudly. “I just feel so helpless, Lucian lies dying Russell. If he doesn’t drink from her soon he may never wake and even if he does the monster within him might have taken control and our Lord would be lost to us forever.”

  “You worry too much, Sara will be strong enough in a few days to lose some blood, Lucian will be fine.”

  “No Russell, she won’t be strong enough. You’ve seen her. The woman never stops working. She works on a secret project every morning that leaves her so drained she has to sleep most of the afternoon away and then she’s up all night crafting swords. Even I can tell she’s draining herself of strength by doing all of that. There are bags under her eyes, her skin is always pale and have you heard her heart beat recently?” he scoffed. “It’s weak all of the time.”

  “There’s nothing we can do about that Gareth. She’s a swordsmith, we can’t tell her to stop without explaining why and that defeats the whole point of secrecy. Lord Lucian would be furious. The only thing we can do is watch over him and encourage her to work less.”

  “Brides are far too much work,” Gareth stated adamantly. “Far too much work for far too small a reward. Let’s just go and see how Lord Lucian is doing and if it looks as though he’s deteriorating then I suggest we take extreme action.”

  The door was close now and Gareth’s step quickened, closing the small distance between him and the guards quickly.

  “Commander Gareth, Commander Russell,” the guards said as they bowed in greeting. A cryptic look passed between the two as they tried to decide silently who would break the bad ne
ws to their Commanders.

  “Commanders, there is something we must tell you before you go and see Lord Lucian.” The man paused, unsure if he truly wanted to proceed.

  “Hurry up man,” Gareth rushed.

  “It’s about Lady Sara,”

  “Get on with it,” he prodded.

  “Lady Sara…she found out about Lord Lucian's condition.”

  “What!” Gareth bellowed. “How did she find out?”

  “I don’t know Commander but there’s one other thing you should know.”

  “What! What could make tonight worse? First we find that demons have attacked the estate, now you tell me that despite Lord Lucian's wishes his bride has discovered his true whereabouts.” He sighed, throwing his hands skyward in exasperation. “Next you’re going to tell me that William has persuaded some factions to turn traitor while Lord Lucian has been out of action.”

  “No sir, but Lady Sara…Lady Sara is waiting for you inside.”

  Both Gareth and Russell groaned; it was going to be a very long night. Gareth moved past the guards and opened the door, finding Sara sitting on the bed with Lucian's head in her lap, gently stroking his hair. They walked into the room and closed the door behind them, their minds trying desperately to find a way out of their current predicament.

  “Hello Gareth, hello Russell,” she sighed before bringing the room to light so that she could better see their faces.

  “Lady Sara,” Russell began. “What are you doing here?”

  “I came to see Lucian who is not visiting his dead relatives.”

  Russell winced as his lie was thrown back into his face. He’d uttered the words when Sara had rushed to see him upon his release from the dungeons. He’d barely been briefed on the situation and had said the first thing that had come to his mind. He’d known the words were false but had hoped she didn’t and once the words were out there was no way to get them back.

  Sara’s blue eyes turned to Gareth next. “Nor is he off hunting William alone with no guards.” Gareth’s lips parted to defend his actions but she cut him off before he could utter a word, raising her hand and shaking her head. “I don’t want to hear your excuses. Lucian trusts you both with his life; I know you were probably just doing what he asked you to. All I want to know now is how to wake him, how to make him better.”

  “We can’t tell you Lady Sara,” Russell sighed.

  “Why not?”

  “Lord Lucian told us not to.”

  “Well if it hasn’t escaped your notice, he’s not in the position to be asking anything of anyone. Damn it, why wouldn’t he want me to know how to make him better? Does he want to die? Does he want to leave me?”

  As Gareth watched the tears well up in Sara’s eyes a startling realisation dawned upon him. “He didn’t tell you did he?”

  “Tell me what? He doesn’t seem to want me to know anything.”

  “He didn’t tell you what would happen to him if he drank your blood did he?”

  “Gareth,” Russell hissed. “Be quiet.”

  “No, this is important. Lady Sara, what has Lord Lucian told you about a vampire and his bride?”

  “Nothing really. I don’t see what this has to do with helping Lucian get better and that’s what’s important here. Just tell me how to help him.”

  “Lady Sara, by drinking your blood, Lord Lucian has tied his strength to you.”

  “What are you talking about?” she demanded, becoming increasingly frustrated with where the discussion was going.

  “Lady Sara, your blood is the only thing that can help him. If Lord Lucian drinks the blood of anyone else he won’t regain his strength, he won’t heal, he won’t feel anything. That’s why having a bride is such a liability. If something happens to you, it will affect him. If William captured you, the Lord would eventually fade into nothing because he wouldn’t be able to drink you.”

  “I don’t understand. Lucian has only drunk my blood once and he hasn’t drunk from me in days.”

  Russell sighed in defeat. Most of the truth was already out in the open there was no point in hiding the rest. “He was reluctant to drink from you before because he knew what drinking from you would do to him and with a war to fight he couldn’t afford to be tied to a single source of strength. And when he did…when he did finally drink from you, he took too much.”

  “Yes, he told me that part. I have felt a little weak over the last few days but I just put that down to working too hard. So what you’re telling me is that for Lucian to get better, he needs to drink from me again?”

  “Yes,” Russell sighed.

  “I don’t see what the problem is. I like it when Lucian drinks from me.” Her face flushed red in embarrassment as she remembered the pleasure that raced through her veins when his fangs sank into her flesh. “Wake him up and he can take whatever he needs to get better.”

  “Sara, you don’t understand,” Russell began, running his hand over his head in frustration. “It takes a while for a body to regenerate blood and an even longer time for someone who’s never given blood before to get back to their normal blood levels. If Lucian were to drink from you now, he could seriously hurt you. It’s even possible that you could die.”

  Russell’s words hit her hard but then she looked down at Lucian's face, so pale and serene in sleep. So many people relied on him and he bore the weight of their needs with ease. It wasn’t a hard decision to make. If Lucian didn’t recover Seraphina would be unleashed and so many would die before the spirit finally consumed her life. Lucian's place in her heart was paramount, there was nothing she wouldn’t do for him and she had no doubt that it was because he’d known this that he’d decided to hide his presence from her. She closed her eyes and placed a chaste kiss to his brow before turning her eyes back to the two men in front of her. “Wake him.”

  “Lady Sara, weren’t you listening? If Lord Lucian drinks from you in your condition you could die.”

  She sighed loudly. “I’m dying anyway. If Lucian dies then so do I. If me giving up my life means that he lives, I consider it a worthwhile sacrifice. Wake him.”

  They both gasped, shocked by her admission. “Lady Sara, it can’t be.”

  “I’m telling you the truth Russell. I need Lucian to live. Tell me what I need to do.”

  Gareth’s eyes darted between Sara’s calm face and Lucian's battered body a decision quickly forming. Lucian's welfare was his top priority and if they were both insistent on saving the other then he would save his Lord first and worry about the consequences later. “Lady Sara, if this is really what you want to do then I’ll help you.”

  “It is,” she said calmly.

  “Gareth,” Russell scolded. “You can’t do this.”

  “I can and I will. If you don’t want to save Lord Lucian then just wait outside, it’ll all be over soon.”

  “I want to help Lord Lucian as much as you do but this isn’t the way. We can afford to wait a few more days for Lady Sara’s health to improve.”

  “She’s not going to be well quick enough to save him. The longer he’s in the deep sleep, the more likely it is that he won’t leave it. We must do this now.” He moved towards Russell, binding his arms securely and moving him bodily towards the door. Russell thrashed wildly, trying to escape and stop Sara before she did something irreversible but Gareth was too strong. “Lady Sara,” Gareth called over his shoulder. “You’re the only one who can wake him. Think back to the times his eyes have turned red from intense emotion, remember what you were doing and you’ll be able to save him.”

  “Thank you Gareth and thank you for caring so much about my welfare Russell but this is something I have to do. I’m glad that I had the chance to know you both.”

  “My Lady.” Gareth inclined his head in respect before forcing Russell out of the door and leaving Sara alone with Lucian.

  Chapter Twenty – The Monster Within

  It wasn’t hard to think back to when Lucian's eyes had turned red with passion and she stood, gently p
lacing his head back on the pillow. “You know I have to do this Lucian,” she whispered softly as she began to undress. The leather bindings around her arms slid easily to the ground before she pulled her shirt over her head. “I love you Lucian. You have to know that.” She pulled the breeches down her legs and slipped back between the sheets.

  His body against hers sapped the heat from her but she pressed herself closer to him. Her hands caressed the bare expanse of his chest, hoping that her heated embrace would stir his body and cause his heart to beat. Straddling his lithe hips, she pressed a tender kiss against his cold lips, parting his mouth with her hot tongue and forcing some of the warm air from her lips into his frigid lungs. She sighed in triumph when she felt the first, faint stirrings of a heartbeat beneath her palm. His body was slowly but surely coming to life. She continued kissing him, hoping that he would soon join her, that his tongue would entwine with her own but her hopes were dashed. Though his heart was beating, it was slow and irregular, entire seconds going by with no sign of life before the faint echo of a heartbeat reached her. Frustrated she pulled away, sitting up to watch him. She placed one of her hands atop his chest, carefully monitoring his heartbeat before letting the other slide down behind her to wrap around the length of his shaft. His heart raced for a few seconds before it returned to its irregular beat.

  “Lucian,” she pleaded, cupping his face in both hands. “Please wake up. I need you.” She pressed a heated kiss to his lips, hoping to convey the wealth of emotion she felt for him. His heart sped up once again but the rapid beat soon petered out.

  Groaning in frustration, she threw herself away from him to pace the length of the room. “Why isn’t it working? His eyes turn red when we’re together like this. Why isn’t it working now?” She racked her mind, desperately trying to think of another time when his eyes had glowed red and it suddenly hit her. Jealousy. His eyes had always glowed an eerie, almost demonic red at the thought of others looking at her with lust in their eyes, at the very idea that someone would take away what he coveted above all else. Lucian was possessive to a fault and to save him she would exploit that weakness ruthlessly.