A Vision of Fire

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A Vision of Fire Page 11

by Gillian Anderson


  The door to the office was open and Caitlin, first in, watched Gaelle stand up behind her desk as the little group strode in. The first thing Caitlin noticed was the slightly sunken look around Gaelle’s hazel eyes. This young woman had not been sleeping well. Otherwise, her hair had been freshly braided and pulled up into a chignon, and she was wearing a pale yellow blouse. Everything about her and the office was tidy, tucked in, as neatly organized as a nurse’s station in a hospital. And Gaelle’s manner was purposeful, just shy of abrupt.

  The young woman did not seem overly pleased to see Dr. Basher or the Vodou family, but she greeted them courteously and shook hands. A surprisingly tall, strong middle-aged woman with a creased face and worried eyes appeared from a back room. She had an air of reticence that had grown over her formidable physicality like a vine on a wall. Gaelle introduced her as her stepmother, Marie-Jeanne, and she was cordial to the madame and her son, slightly less so with the Americans. Caitlin quickly asked to sit alone with Gaelle in the small garden in the back. Marie-Jeanne agreed to mind the office for a few minutes and Aaron took the madame and her son around the corner for coffee. They went willingly, the madame giving a shrug as if to say, Free coffee is free coffee.

  Gaelle made it clear by her proper, unrelaxed manner that she had no interest in small talk. Caitlin asked her some basic questions about her family’s medical history, and Gaelle answered. Caitlin marked her answers in a small, unintimidating notebook.

  “I want to make sure you understand,” Caitlin went on, “that you don’t need to feel embarrassed or ashamed about our talk.”

  “This happened through no device of my doing,” Gaelle replied frostily. “What have I to be ashamed of?”

  “I was not referring to the incident,” Caitlin said. “I meant my questions.”

  Gaelle seemed embarrassed by her own defensiveness. She softened a little. “Please ask the questions you need to help your patient.”

  “Thank you again. You said your mother died a few months after you were born. You were raised by your father?”

  “Until I was sixteen, four years ago. Now he lives in the Dominican Republic. He works in a hotel.”

  “Why did he leave?”

  “The money is a little better there. I encouraged him to go.”

  Caitlin smiled. It had no effect. “Dr. Basher explained to you what happened in the market? That you showed symptoms of drowning and hypothermia?”

  Gaelle nodded once.

  “Have you ever come close to drowning?”

  “No.”

  “Do you go out with your stepmother on the fishing boat?”

  “Rarely. I have my work and my studies. I have little free time.”

  “Do you ever swim in the ocean?”

  “As I said, there is little free time.”

  “What about when you were a child?” Caitlin pressed. “Might something have happened then?”

  “Dr. O’Hara, I am from a town in the mountains where we walked for an hour to get our daily water. We moved here in 2012. An organization offered to establish fishing businesses for Haitians.”

  “So you were inland during the 2010 earthquake?”

  “Yes. I was not near the tsunami that struck Jacmel. I only saw trees falling, shacks collapsing onto the people inside them.” She closed her mouth, lips pressed tightly together.

  “Gaelle, has anything happened recently—anything upsetting?” Caitlin was thinking of Maanik and the assassination attempt.

  “Life is not easy here,” she said. “That is upsetting.”

  “I understand,” Caitlin said. “I was asking about anything specific. Something that made you fearful, afraid?”

  Gaelle took a moment. Her pinched expression did not suggest someone who was trying to remember something. Rather, she seemed uncertain about what to share.

  “There are gangs who come out at night, from Port-au-Prince,” she said. “We go inside to escape the biting insects—but then the other hunters, they know where to find us.”

  Caitlin felt a wave of anxiety rise as she imagined being afraid to walk in the town at night, being afraid of strangers.

  “Were you hurt?”

  Gaelle shook her head brusquely.

  “Threatened?”

  “They touch, they push, they grab,” she said with disgust in her voice. “Sometimes too much. That is not new. I am all right.”

  Gaelle was not all right, and Caitlin hurt for her while resenting her own helplessness. But the psychiatrist accepted that she wasn’t getting anywhere with this conversation. And worse, she sensed that Gaelle was pulling up the drawbridge. She had to try something more direct.

  “Gaelle, are you familiar with therapeutic hypnotism? Using a trance to access your subconscious?”

  “A little. I researched psychiatry online last night.”

  “Because . . . ?”

  “I like to know things,” she answered evasively.

  “So do I.” Caitlin smiled.

  The girl sat stony-faced. She did not want to bond.

  “Gaelle, I have been using this technique with my other patient. I would like very much to try it with you.”

  Before she even made the request Caitlin knew that Gaelle would say no. This young woman had fought for control in a country that afforded little. Structured time and a structured mind were as close as she could come to feeling safe.

  “Before you answer,” Caitlin jumped in, “I want to explain that I am not asking this lightly. If I thought there was any other way to identify the cause of your episode, I would suggest it. This is emergency psychiatric medicine.”

  Gaelle stared at her, placed her chin in her hand. “Do you believe that I am mentally ill?”

  “I told you over the phone, I do not,” Caitlin said emphatically.

  Gaelle stared at her a little longer, then stood. “I will discuss it with my stepmother. Please come back in a half hour.”

  CHAPTER 15

  Caitlin spent the time watching waves slide across the beach. She had always enjoyed going to Coney Island or Jones Beach as a kid, but back then the ocean was an adventure. Now it was a mystery. She remembered her dream, the black wave rolling toward her.

  Is that the ultimate paradox of life, she wondered, that the universe should become less clear with age?

  Yes, she decided with a last, admiring glance at the sea as she dusted sand from her butt. She looked at a grain among grains on the tip of her index finger.

  “You were here before we were,” she said.

  Caitlin did not brush the sand away but left it, like a second skin, and headed back to the pale green house. Now, away from the fresh sea breeze, she was starting to sweat through her blouse. The afternoon heat surpassed 90 degrees, typical for October in Haiti. Sunset and stronger winds from the Caribbean would provide some relief in the evening, but then mosquitoes and fleas would become plentiful. The universe had a cruel sense of humor.

  A dozen people had clustered on the street by the Anglade office, not too close to the veranda. They were all Haitian and were loosely divided into two groups, those staring mutely at the house and those who were chatting with each other. Word had apparently spread about the Anglades’ visitors, but was it Caitlin or the Vodou clergy from the city who were attracting the attention? As soon as one person in the gathering saw her, they all turned their heads, fell into a stony silence, and watched her approach. There were no smiles, only cautious eyes and defensively lifted chins.

  A man in a priest’s collar called to her in French or Creole, she wasn’t sure which. She replied only, “Excusez-moi.” Although she heard him start again, Caitlin didn’t break her pace toward the door. It was not the time to engage with anyone else, not now.

  The door to the office was open, in keeping with tropical etiquette. Madame Langlois, her son, and Aaron had arrived before
her. Houngan Enock had been speaking fervently to Marie-Jeanne; he stopped when Caitlin entered. The madame was perched in a corner holding her blue tarp bag on her lap with the patience of ages. Aaron was on his cell phone in the room behind the office. He was talking to the clinic and hydrating with a two-liter bottle of water.

  As Caitlin made her way across the room she watched Gaelle, who was sitting at her desk in a semblance of normal working life, a cup of jasmine tea losing steam in a saucer nearby. The young woman was drawing on a small notepad and Caitlin leaned in for a closer look. She saw crescent marks in the shape of triangles, grouped into one large triangle. The symbols meant nothing to her but she didn’t have long to examine them. Gaelle moved the notepad aside and pulled a brochure over it. Gaelle’s guard was back up, and Caitlin thought better of asking about the drawing she had just hidden away.

  “Is everything all right?” she asked instead.

  Gaelle nodded.

  “Have you had time to think on your own?” Caitlin did not emphasize the last three words but her meaning was clear. “This is your decision,” she added.

  Gaelle shook her head and seemed about to speak, but Houngan Enock interrupted. “We do not value loneliness in Haiti, doctor.”

  “What does that mean exactly?” Caitlin queried, restraining her increasing defensiveness.

  “What I said. We are here to help her with this important decision.”

  They heard an upswelling of noise from the street. Caitlin looked through the window. The group outside had increased in size and intensity.

  “You are certainly bringing a lot of ‘help,’ ” Caitlin said quietly.

  Gaelle gave her the ghost of a smile. At last, a connection, Caitlin thought.

  Gaelle’s stepmother spoke in Creole. Gaelle translated for Caitlin. “She is saying, ‘Don’t blame our visitors. Since the video was on the Internet, we have been seeing many strangers around. Some Haitian, some white.’ ”

  Caitlin spoke up. “Have they said anything to you, Gaelle? Done anything?”

  “Only talk,” the girl answered unhappily. “It doesn’t matter.”

  “Yes, it does. You should not have to live with that.” Caitlin cautiously moved a hand across the desk toward her. “Please let me help you.”

  “So they can talk more?” Enock challenged.

  “So I can help you stop an incident like the last one if it happens again.”

  Gaelle looked at Caitlin, then at her desk, and shook her head slowly. “I must say no, doctor.”

  “But why?”

  Gaelle’s stepmother said something quickly, made an axe-like gesture with her hand. Gaelle translated, though it was unnecessary. “The decision is made.”

  Enock smiled and placed himself on the edge of the desk, between Gaelle and Caitlin. He began to dig in his own plastic bag and pull out small boxes and bags. Caitlin tried to catch the madame’s eye but she was watching her son impassively.

  Caitlin stood and stepped to one side. It was becoming clear what was soon to happen.

  “Gaelle, is it your wish to seek help through a Vodou ceremony?” she asked.

  They heard a sudden chant from the people in the street and then several voices rose in a Christian hymn. Marie-Jeanne and Enock began to speak quickly in Creole but Gaelle cut them off.

  “No, I will go,” she said emphatically.

  Gaelle stood and glided toward the door with elegance. From the window Caitlin saw her approach the Catholic priest. There was no sign that he was of special significance to her but she was respectful and unafraid. The people nearest the priest shot the young woman suspicious looks.

  Aaron, now leaning on the doorjamb of the back room, spoke to Caitlin. “People are on edge,” he said.

  “Clearly.”

  “It’s not just this,” he said. “In early November there is usually a severe spike in violence in Port-au-Prince. It’s the Vodou holy days. Grave robbers desecrate Vodou territory, throw rocks at their holy people, that kind of thing. Sometimes there are riots, though I think it’s really all a vent because of the poverty here.”

  Caitlin understood his point immediately: anything could spark off this crowd. Especially if they thought someone was possessed. That was why Gaelle had been so quick to deny it when they spoke.

  “And there is white bias,” Enock snapped. “They come here and tell us that we are primitive yet they have no knowledge of our faith. Frightened people spread outrageous lies—that it was Vodou that caused the earthquake, that we bargain with devils. We do not do this ‘black magic’!” He shot the accusation at Caitlin personally.

  “I would never say that you do,” Caitlin replied.

  “Your questions in the car were . . . superior.”

  “I never meant—”

  “No. Your kind has been like this!” He threw his chin angrily toward the crowd and the priest. “Your arrogant manipulation of reality is more black magic than ours!” He slammed a jar of red powder onto the table next to him. “We look farther into reality. You . . . you just twist it.”

  “How?” Caitlin asked, trying to stay focused and understanding.

  “You peck at it, like chickens at meal. You study the pieces instead of the whole. That is not a cure! That is”—he took a moment to search for the word—“what you call dissection. It is autopsy.”

  Against her will, Caitlin’s temper started to rise. But she kept her mouth shut.

  “From what I know of Vodou,” Aaron said to no one in particular, “it’s a way for people to gather, bring up their problems, share food, dance, and feel that they matter—that they’re part of something bigger.”

  “Your explanation is like the surface of the sea.” Enock scowled, moving his hand like rippling waves. “It is just what the white outsider sees.”

  “You misunderstand me,” Aaron said. “I think all of those things are essential for our souls.”

  “I tell you, you know nothing,” Enock sneered. “Either of you.”

  “Then educate us!” Caitlin said.

  Marie-Jeanne said something quickly to Enock that stopped him in his tracks. Enock paused and then casually translated for Caitlin.

  “She says she knows what caused Gaelle’s fou in the market.”

  All eyes snapped to Marie-Jeanne. She was rubbing her forehead and staring at the ceiling.

  Enock continued translating. “You do not need to hypnotize Gaelle. She will tell you. Three days ago a tourist fell from Marie-Jeanne’s boat. Marie-Jeanne dove in and rescued him but she nearly drowned herself. When Gaelle heard of this she was very upset.”

  Caitlin said nothing. She felt as if she’d been hit in the chest by one of those large breakers on the shore. This could not be a coincidence.

  They heard voices rise in a hymn from the street. Caitlin looked out the window and there were thirty-five or forty people outside the house. Gaelle, still in the middle of them, turned from the priest and entered the office, frowning.

  “They are children, sometimes,” she said. “Fighting, fighting, fighting about the business of others.”

  Caitlin heard but did not process what Gaelle was saying. Her mind was still on what Enock had translated. “Gaelle, I must talk to you. I came here initially to help my patient in New York, to learn—”

  “No!” the girl insisted before she even sat down. “Everything stops now. No confession, no hypnotism, nothing. I am not sick, except of all this nonsense!”

  “You’re absolutely right,” Caitlin said, with sudden inspiration. She had to convince Gaelle, had to show her what was at stake. “This is not illness. It’s an assault of some kind.” She pulled out her phone and scrolled through her files.

  “What are you saying?”

  “Please, I can show you . . .”

  Caitlin found the iconic picture of the girl from Hiroshima and handed
the phone to Gaelle. A shade of empathy and fear crossed the young woman’s face.

  “Who is this?” she asked.

  “That is a girl who just survived a nuclear bomb. The look on her face, that intensity of suffering, is exactly what my patient in New York is experiencing. And what I believe you have experienced too.”

  Enock, Aaron, and Marie-Jeanne all looked over Gaelle’s shoulder. For a moment Caitlin thought Gaelle might weep. The young woman handed the phone to her stepmother and spoke in Creole.

  Enock stood peremptorily. “You are simply manipulating her. Sympathy is not a revelation,” he stated. “Nor is it action. I will show you both.”

  He grabbed the small jar he had slammed on the table, then moved two chairs to clear a space on the floor and closed the door to the veranda. The crowd outside immediately responded to his actions as if they knew what was coming next. Their tones of disapproval rose into almost a chant.

  But what was happening next? Caitlin thought she had tapped into something with Gaelle, that she was getting somewhere, but was this silence the girl’s only response? Was she going to submit to Enock?

  The Houngan began tapping red powder out of his jar in a long line down the floor. Caitlin caught a very faint, familiar scent. It was cayenne pepper. Enock finished the first line and started tapping out a second one perpendicular to the first.

  Caitlin was moving to confer with Aaron when Madame Langlois stood up and, handing her blue tarp bag to Caitlin, turned her fierce eyes on her son. In Creole, she snapped at him. He answered back defensively. Caitlin thought she recognized the word “papa” and asked Aaron about it.

  “Papa Legba is the loa that guards the gate between our world and theirs,” he whispered in her ear. “No spirit can come through without his approval.”

  “I don’t understand,” she whispered back. “Was Enock going to try to contact him?”

  “I don’t know,” he admitted.

 

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