by Diann Hunt
Callie was right about something else, too. He had been running from guilt over Nicole. But he had been wrong. It wasn’t his fault. He could see that now. Still, his heart grieved for the loss of his sister.
Once he pulled his car onto the street, Brad had settled something deep inside his heart. He would pray about his decision, and come next week, if he still felt sure in his heart that this was the right thing to do, he would let Ryan know his decision one way or the other.
He didn’t know what the future held, but wherever it took him, he hoped and prayed Callie Easton would be a part of it.
“What’s this for?” Bonnie asked when Callie handed her the vase of red roses.
“Because I love you.” Callie kissed her on the cheek. “And because I feel bad I haven’t had time to spend with you lately. I’ve been so wrapped up in work and helping with that playhouse.”
“Oh, honey, you didn’t need to do this. I know you’ve been busy.” She took a whiff of the fragrant petals. “These are lovely.” She gave Callie a sideways squeeze. “Thank you.” Walking over to her manicure station, Aunt Bonnie rearranged some polish bottles and placed her vase there.
“How’s Uncle George?” Callie asked, preparing her hair station for her next client.
Bonnie ran a dust cloth across a shelf. “Oh, you know your uncle. Same old, same old.” She chuckled. “He’s been playing those video games every night. I’m just about ready to pull the plug on him.”
Callie laughed. “He’s fifty-six going on sixteen.”
“Exactly,” Bonnie shifted hair product around on the shelf.
“Which reminds me, you’ve got an anniversary coming up. How many years is it now?”
“Thirty-five, can you believe it?” Bonnie said, wistfully.
Callie shook her head.
“Did I ever tell you that your dad set us up?” She smiled. “My brother was always looking out for me.” The moment she said it, she appeared to regret it. They both knew why. He certainly hadn’t looked out for Callie.
Callie didn’t comment on that. “So, what would you think of a little party for your anniversary?”
The words barely left Callie’s mouth before Bonnie shook her head. “George and I don’t enjoy parties. You know we like things low-key.” She shrugged. “That’s just us. A quiet dinner out, now, that sounds perfect,” Bonnie said. “We’ve never been fans of all the hubbub.”
Callie smiled. “I know.” But of course that wouldn’t stop her from planning…something.
Callie had planted colorful petunias in the window box of the playhouse along with vines that spilled over the wooden edge. Brad had put a small shrub on either side of the front entrance. They stood back and admired their project, knowing Micah would be there any minute. Callie clapped her hands together. “It is beautiful, Brad. Thank you so much for letting me be a part of it.”
He studied her. The joy on her face warmed him clear through. On impulse he grabbed her close and gave her a hug. “This is our gift to Micah.” He smiled down at her, and his heart took a leap in his chest. He couldn’t help thinking he was staring into the eyes of his soul mate. Yet there were so many questions, so many uncertainties about the future. He wanted to stay in Burrow now, but was he letting his love for her get in the way of rational decision making? Before he could think more on that, Callie reached up and kissed him softly on the lips.
“Thank you.” She quickly turned away, leaving him speechless, his heart thrumming wildly within him.
“Here we go,” Mick Sauders announced, causing them both to turn with a start. Andrea put her finger to her lips as they came around the corner so Brad and Callie wouldn’t say anything and spoil the surprise.
The family walked toward them. A blindfold was wrapped around Micah’s eyes. Mick guided her footsteps, directing her toward the playhouse. She giggled with every step.
“What is it, Daddy?”
The grown-ups smiled, each one as excited as the child.
“Is Chaos out here, Mommy?”
Brad noticed the flicker of a shadow in Callie’s eyes.
“No, honey, Chaos is not here.”
“Oh,” she said, disappointed.
“Are you ready?” Mick asked.
“Ready!” Micah shouted with a sharp nod of her head.
“Okay, here we go.” He unwrapped the blindfold and everyone shouted, “Surprise!”
Micah’s eyes grew large as walnuts. Her mouth dropped but not a single utterance spilled out. She walked over to the little pink cottage, stepped up to the porch and ran her fingers along the wooden columns as though they were gold. She looked in disbelief first to her parents, then to Brad and Callie. “Is this—mine?” Apprehension lined her question, as though merely saying it would wake her up from a beautiful dream.
“Yes, honey, this is yours,” Brad said.
Micah ran over to Brad and Callie and hugged them furiously. Then Andrea took Micah into the house so she could collect her treasured dolls and serve them tea in the new playhouse. Brad had never known a more perfect day in his entire life. He studied Callie’s face as she watched Micah play, more convinced than ever that staying in Burrow was the right decision.
Now all he had to do was tell her.
Chapter Seventeen
When Callie got home from work the following Friday, she noticed Chaos seemed a bit lethargic. She’d fed him, but he just didn’t seem himself. If he kept acting that way, she’d take him to see the vet in the morning.
Right after dinner, Chaos sat by the back door and whined, a sure sign he needed to go outside. After letting him out, her doorbell rang. She wondered if it might be Brad with bad news. Before opening the door, she braced herself.
She was surprised to find Andrea and Micah. Though Callie had given them an open invitation to visit Chaos, they had never come before.
“Well, hello. Come on in.” Callie stepped aside so they could enter.
After settling on the sofa, Andrea started to tell why they had come to visit when Chaos barked from outside.
Micah perked up, but her mother laid a calming hand on Micah’s knee.
No sooner had Callie opened the back door than Chaos went romping through the kitchen and into the living room. She watched with disbelief as life sparked through him and he jumped on a giggling Micah.
“Are you all right?” Andrea asked, studying Callie.
“Yes, I’m—I’m fine.” Callie sat, her gaze never leaving Chaos. “It’s just that he didn’t seem—well, earlier he seemed—oh, never mind. It doesn’t matter now.” She lifted a smile to Andrea, trying to hide the dull ache in her heart.
“Micah begged me to see if you would allow Chaos to spend the night with us.” While the puppy and little girl played together, Andrea leaned in to Callie. “Micah thinks Chaos is a little friend.”
Callie grinned. “I can see that.” After a moment of watching the two together, Callie said, “Sure, I don’t see why Chaos can’t go. The nice thing about dogs is I don’t have to pack an overnight bag.”
After a while Andrea and Micah walked out of the house with Chaos in tow. Callie waved goodbye with sadness in her heart.
She knew what she had to do. The question was when.
After Chaos left with the Sauders, Callie decided she couldn’t stay home. She grabbed her keys and handbag and headed out the door. The smell of early summer scented the air. Twilight had settled over Burrow. Pulling her car into the cemetery lot, Callie got out and strolled over to the familiar place she had come to visit so many times before.
She and Nicole had not been best friends. Still, somehow she could talk to Nicole about Brad in ways she couldn’t to anyone else—not even Heather or Aunt Bonnie.
When she got there, she placed a fresh vase of daisies by the headstone and took the other one away. She’d take it home and clean it out, then refill it and bring it back. She hoped the family wouldn’t mind what she was doing. But then how would they know? No doubt they grieved too much to
visit.
She settled into the portable cloth chair she brought with her each time she visited. Wrapped in birdsong and twilight, Callie recorded her thoughts in a journal, stopping occasionally to talk to Nicole.
Twilight melted into night and peace replaced her fears of the future, one pen stroke at a time.
“Would you repeat that, Mark?” Brad asked. “The line cut out just as you said that.”
Mark Huston, a fellow missionary and friend said, “We want you to come over and head up our building project here in Belize.”
“Belize.” Just when Brad thought he had settled the matter in his mind.
“Yep.”
Brad could hear the smile in his friend’s voice. Normally, he would be jumping up and down for joy. Everything was a go. He had the money, he had the time and now he had the opportunity. But one thing stood in his way.
Callie.
“Wow, that’s quite an offer.”
“We don’t know of a better man for the job than you, Brad. You are gifted, bro.”
“Thanks.”
“Do I hear some hesitation?” Mark asked with concern.
“Well, you know, I want to pray about it. Make sure I do the right thing.”
“Sure, of course. Too bad you can’t come over here and take a look. That might help you decide.”
This was a huge decision. It could change the course of his life forever.
“That’s a good idea. I’ll come for a visit, then make my decision.”
“Well, that would be great.” His friend was practically breathless with excitement, telling him all that he would show him—the people, the needs, the work to be done. By the end of the conversation they had come to a decision that Brad would leave as soon as he could get a reasonable ticket.
When Brad hung up the phone, he was more confused than ever. Just when he thought he had made up his mind to stay in Burrow, this came up.
He glanced at the ceiling. “Are you messin’ with me, Lord?” He grabbed his keys and went to the one place he could not only talk to the Lord but also talk things over with the only best friend he’d ever had.
Nicole.
Callie glanced up at the sky, finished the last sentence in her journal and closed it. She hadn’t realized it had gotten so late. “Thanks for listening to me,” she whispered.
Just then she heard a twig snap. She whipped around.
“So you’re the one.” Brad stepped into view in the moonlight.
“Oh, uh, the one what?” She stood and closed her chair, wanting desperately to make a hasty retreat.
“The one who brought the daisies for Nicole. I should have known.”
“Is that all right?”
“Only you would think of such a thing. Thanks.”
“You’re welcome. I didn’t think you came here. I knew the grief was so great…” She let the words trail off.
He gazed at the grave. “You’re right. I couldn’t bring myself to come here. Until recently.” He looked back to Callie. “Sounds kind of crazy, but I like to talk to her.”
“I know. Me, too.” She hoped he was talking to Nicole about the possibility of staying in Burrow. Maybe this was a good sign. Though deep down she wished he’d talk to her about it.
Something about him tonight looked off-kilter. “You all right?” she asked.
“Sure, I’m fine.” He cleared his throat. “I’m taking a trip to Belize in a couple of days,” he said as though he were taking a trip across town. No big deal.
“Oh, sounds nice. How long will you be gone?” A sick ball of worry formed in her stomach, its tendrils reaching up through her chest to her throat, causing it to constrict.
“I’m not sure. I’m checking it out.” He hesitated. “They’ve offered me a job there, to oversee home construction.”
Her stomach clenched. “Oh, really?” She tried to appear happy about the news, to share his joy, regardless of whether it rocked her world.
“It’s beautiful country. You should see it.”
“I don’t have the need to see the world the way you do.”
“Callie, wait, before you get all—”
“Look, Brad, you don’t have to explain to me. If that’s what you feel you should do, I say go for it. You’ve made it clear from day one that that was your dream, so follow it. You don’t have anything in Burrow to hold you here. Your mom is doing better and so is Gram. Besides, your brother can take care of them, and you have your own life to live. Hope it’s a great one.” She tromped off the premises, leaving him speechless.
There. She’d done it. Rejected him before he could reject her.
By the time she got to the car, her hands were shaking and tears pooled in her eyes. But she would not cry. Not this time.
After dinner Callie, Aunt Bonnie and Uncle George settled into the living room.
“Your hair looks nice. I was surprised to see you changed it back to blonde so soon,” Aunt Bonnie said.
Callie shrugged. “I like blonde better.”
They both knew it was more than that.
“Have you heard from him?” Aunt Bonnie asked before sipping from her teacup.
Callie shook her head and studied her nail polish. She hadn’t worn pink pearl or coral in a while.
“Should be home soon. What’s it been, a week?” Aunt Bonnie asked.
Callie nodded. “I don’t know how long he’s staying. Maybe he’ll make the decision to just stay there.”
“I doubt that. You don’t know for sure that he’s even accepting the job, right?”
“He will. It’s everything he’s been wanting.”
Aunt Bonnie sighed. “I can’t help feeling responsible. I encouraged you to—to—”
“To what, Bonnie? Hunt the poor man down till he agreed to walk down the aisle?” Uncle George tsked-tsked. “You women and your matchmaking. Don’t you listen to her, Beanie,” he said. “If God wants you together, you’ll be together. If not, you’re better off without him.”
Aunt Bonnie shrugged. “You’re right, and I was wrong.”
“Stop the presses! The woman admits she’s wrong.”
“Oh, you,” Bonnie said.
Callie looked at her aunt and uncle, and a fresh wave of love washed over her, reminding her once again why she couldn’t leave Burrow. As much as she loved Brad, she could not leave them.
“Well, it sounds as though Brad has some exciting possibilities,” Uncle George said.
“I suppose,” Callie said. “Though I don’t know how he could leave Burrow.”
Aunt Bonnie studied her. “We have to follow God’s call upon our hearts, wherever that may lead us.”
Callie looked at her. “I could never leave Burrow. You and Uncle George are my family.”
“And you think God needs you to look after us?”
“Well—”
“He’s quite capable of handling us, you know.”
She hated it when Aunt Bonnie put a spin on things this way. “I know, but—”
“We know where your allegiance lies, Callie. We know you would never leave us out of a selfish heart. We also know that if God asked you to leave, you would be obedient. We would expect nothing less from you.”
Callie heard the strong words and struggled with the idea that God would ever take her away from Burrow.
As she drove home, Aunt Bonnie’s words haunted her, though she’d tried her best to push them away. Aunt Bonnie was giving her blessing, and so was Uncle George, to go, if need be.
Letting go. That was love. Real love. Agape love. Could she let go of Brad? Aunt Bonnie and Uncle George?
She stumbled in through the door of her bedroom and flopped onto her bed. Chaos whined to get out of his crate.
Instantly, Callie saw herself as she was. Selfish. From head to toe. Wanting Brad for herself. Wanting Chaos though she knew he would be better off with Micah. True love didn’t choke. True love allowed people to dream. It encouraged people to be their best. Giving them the freedom to be who they
were. Fear of rejection caused Callie to hang on too tight or walk away completely, to keep from getting hurt.
Callie took a long, deep breath, then looked at Chaos. “I’m going to do this before I lose my nerve.” Grabbing his leash, crate and food and water bowls, Callie placed them in the car. “Come on, Chaos. Go bye-bye.” The spaniel pup jumped into the travel carrier and she strapped it in.
Though her heart ached, the thought of Micah’s face gave her the courage to do what she thought she could never do—give Chaos to the family who could offer him more of something than she ever could.
Time.
Palm trees waved with the night breeze. Brad drank in the sea air. The waters raced to shore, depositing seaweed and shells, then rushed back to sea to pick up more. This was Brad’s last night in Belize, and he still wasn’t sure what to do. His enthusiasm had definitely waned from prior months, but he didn’t want anyone to keep him from fulfilling God’s plan for his life, whatever that might be.
Stars shone in a clear sky. He climbed a large boulder and stared out to sea. If only he could share this with Callie. He glanced back at the forest thick with green foliage. Exotic parrots and toucans fluttered in the trees. His gaze wandered to a thatch-roofed open shelter complete with hammocks that called residents to a gentle rest in the trade winds. Palm and coconut trees clustered inland, while tropical flowers of bright reds, yellows, oranges and pinks sprinkled color across the land. The distant Maya Mountains offered adventures for another day.
All these things normally called to him in a way he couldn’t explain to another human being. The very thought of them had stirred a passion, a longing, inside him that nothing else—or no one else—could satisfy. Until now.
Though he still admired the beauty of this paradise, it didn’t hold the same lure it once had. The pull of helping others grew stronger every day, but this visit confirmed what his spirit would never consider before. He didn’t have to serve here to use the gifts God had given to him. He merely had to do the best he could, with the gifts he had, wherever life took him.