“Come on, Niya. I can’t wait forever.”
Something about her words struck a chord with me. I had to just let shit ride when it came to Jamilla. I just had to force myself to let go. I turned off my phone and entered the plane as I thought about her last text to me.
“Yeah, well, neither can I, baby. I just can’t wait forever.”
Chapter 77
Paradise Found . . . For Now
São Paulo was a welcome getaway for both Niya and Brazil Noelle. Both girls had time to, in a sense, lick their wounds. Brazil’s face was healing nicely, and with the best plastic surgeons at her beck and call, she knew that things would be okay. The girls spent every waking moment together. The bond that was forming would last as long as either of them wanted it.
That day, as they recorded the remix to Niya’s song, something magical happened in that studio. Neither of them knew why or how these feelings had come to be, but neither of them fought them. It was something about working together, feeling the creative juices run through their veins. They got each other; they were wrapped in each other’s vibes. It was as if their souls spoke the same language without even having to utter a word.
After the song wrapped and Niya asked for everyone to clear out of the studio, she knew she had to speak about what she was feeling.
“I am really happy we took this trip together. I’m also happy that I am getting a chance to really get to know you,” she told Brazil.
The truth was infused with the liquor both girls had consumed, and their actions would reek of the potent Brazilian weed that swam in their systems.
“Niya?”
“Yes, Brazil?” Niya moved closer to her, almost needing to feel her skin.
“I like you,” Brazil said as Niya pressed her body against her.
“Man, I feel like I fucking more than like you at this point,” Niya answered as her arms wrapped around Brazil’s waist.
Brazil standing there in her skimpy bikini didn’t help dilute the sexual thoughts that danced around in Niya’s head.
“You know, I don’t know you well yet, but . . . I feel as if I need you,” Brazil said.
Niya’s heart raced as she remembered feeling that way and writing it to Jamilla. She had crossed Niya’s mind often during the past few weeks, but each time Niya would quickly push thoughts of Jamilla out of her mind, as she did on this day.
“Don’t worry. I know that feeling well,” Niya answered.
“So, if I feel as if I need you, and you feel the same way too, why don’t we just say fuck it and have each other?”
Brazil’s words were like sweet samba music to Niya’s ears. Niya held Brazil tightly, and both women fell deeper into each other as they shared their very first kiss to the sounds of Brazil’s verse on the “Team Take Yo’ Bitch” remix.
Seeing her makes me sweat.
Bet you would have never bet
She’s my little secret, well kept.
With just one look she makes me wet.
They asking what’s a Barbie without her Ken babyyy?
I say, “Fuck a Ken. She’s the perfect blend, babyyy.”
My heart is torn. She’s here to mend it, babyyy.
Thought I was straight, but she makes me want to bend, babyyy.
Nothing better than a studdd, baby.
Nothing hotter than a studdd, baby.
Nothing sweeter than a studdd, baby.
She got me needing her, wanting her, feeling her, babyyy.
The shit she do to this body, babyyy.
I’m up to bat and I’m playing for her teammm, babyyy.
She said she want it, I said, “You can have it, babyyy.”
Fuck a nigga. I want a studdd, baby.
Team take your bitch. Got your bitchhhh, babyyy.
Things would forever be different now. Although Brazil’s mother wanted her to use Niya as a ploy to gain more gay fans, Brazil threw all of that out the window. She was really falling for this girl who had seemed to win her heart out of nowhere, and she knew that truly loving her wasn’t far behind.
As for Niya, she just kept telling herself that this was where her heart should be. It should belong to a girl who was willing to love her back. It should be where the two people involved were able to love freely.
For Niya
The space between us is killing me.
The words that were spoken no longer exist, and you can’t hear me.
The love we have seems fleeting, and that is like death to me.
This shit between us, this unspoken hurt haunts me.
We look at each other, yet we can’t see.
I want what was, but that just can’t be.
I am losing you, and, Niya, that thought is drowning me.
Sleepless nights with thoughts of her loving you murder me.
Murder the hope of us and what we were always meant to be.
Niya, I scream your name, hoping that you’ll hear me.
Niya, my love, be there for me.
Love me.
Care for me.
Rescue me.
Can’t you see life is meaningless if you are not there with me?
But wait . . . there it is.
I have made this all about me.
Niya, my love, I do love you.
I do want you.
I do need you.
Niya, my love, let’s start with a clean slate.
Niya, my love, our love, it was all fate.
Niya, my love, I hope it’s not too late.
Jamilla
A Note from the Author
Like love, a beautiful, heartfelt book that is birthed from the purest place may prove elusive. For me, capturing something as rare as the Niya series was pure bliss.
When I think back to the start of it all, I know that I just wanted to write a book for me. I wanted to enter Niya and Jamilla’s world because they invited me in. So, while basking in the purity of it all, I knew that I didn’t want to dilute it with what I thought it should be. Nor did I want to portray it as something it wasn’t. No, I just wanted to write freely, as freely as these characters came to me.
The more I wrote, the more I fell in love, but that did not stop me from asking myself if this book would mean something to anyone but me. I knew that each word that left my fingertips had torn its way through my heart, but still I wanted to know, would the rest of the world understand it? Would they feel it as I did? Would they be able to feel each word?
Even with all these questions floating around in my head, I pushed on and stayed true to the story that was meant to be, and for me, when it was all done, I knew that it was fate. I did not choose these characters. They chose me. And, my God, was I grateful. I got the chance to experience pure love, true friendship, devastation, and perseverance. The words that decorate the pages of Niya for me are life changing. Just like the lives of my two main characters, Niya and Jamilla, this book made me, and at times, it caused me to cave. It took me to the hollowest and darkest places inside of me, and with the love between these two ladies, it brought me back to the light.
The characters’ light, their radiating wholesomeness, even when they are at fault, salvaged the damaged parts in me. Niya and Jamilla gave me hope. They taught me that to dream is to have a belief in yourself. They showed me that a dreamer’s heart will forever beat, and within their world, I learned to believe in my dreams once again.
So, readers, I thank you. You all got a glimpse of the deepest parts of me, and you understood. You even understood the things I could not comprehend until now. So many of you opened your hearts to the story, which I wrote only because I had no choice. You openly received the love of Niya within the pages, and for that, I thank all of you.
Continue to open your mind and your hearts, and enjoy. Always remember that love is blind. It does not see race, religion, or gender.
We are love!
Sincerely,
Fabiola
Contact Fabiola Joseph
Twitter – @Soulofaw
riter
E-mail – [email protected]
Facebook.com/Fabiola.Joseph3
Instagram – TheArtOf BeingFabie
Books by the Author
The Art of Deceit
Porn Stars 1. More Than Just Moans (coauthored with Matthew Ramsey)
Porn Stars 2. The Beginning of the End (coauthored with Matthew Ramsey)
Rebel’s Domain
Pricey: Playing in Traffic
“The Bully Bangers” (short story)
“Truth or Death” (short story)
Niya Page 30