by LeAnn Ashers
He rolls his eyes and laughs. Yes, this badass biker rolled his eyes. “Ade, you weigh almost nothing. I could carry you all day and it wouldn’t faze me.”
I smirk at him, holding my hands up. “Okay then.”
His grin gets wider. Smiley seems to always have a smile on his face. “Sassy,” he teases and I laugh, because I guess I was being kind of sassy. That’s out of character for me.
He holds the door open for me, and we step inside to rows and rows of fishing supplies. “I have no clue what any of this is,” I say. “The only thing I know is live bait and a fishing pole. I don’t even know how to throw out the line.”
Smiley takes my hand again and walks straight to the front, where an older man is sitting behind the counter—reading a fishing magazine, of course.
“Hey, Frank!” Smiley calls and the man’s head snaps up, a huge smile on his face.
“How’s my nephew?” He stands up and goes up, up, and up. Holy crap, this man is tall, and very handsome for an older man. Good genes run in the family, obviously. He comes around and hugs Smiley; then he turns to look at me. “Well, who is this beautiful lady?”
I smile at him. “I’m Adeline.”
Smiley says, “Mine,” as I say my name.
His uncle bursts out laughing, holding his stomach. Smiley tightens his hand on my hip, and I am confused. What just happened? Why did he just say that I was his? What did that mean? But I don’t want to ask in front of his uncle.
Smiley’s thumb slowly strokes my hip, so softly that it’s barely noticeable—but oh, do I notice it. It’s going to take a while to get used to this: someone freely touching me, not meaning to cause harm.
In rehab I was making progress getting over everything that happened to me. Then a doctor told me that I was severely scarred and that more children are not on option because of the damage. That hit me hard, really hard. It crushed my dreams of starting over.
I have thought about adopting. I want to be a mom. That is what I’ve always wanted, and I missed a huge part of Alisha’s life—that guilt will never leave me.
I want Smiley, but I’m also afraid. He could leave me in a split second, and that is very likely, because of everything that happened to me. A man would have to be crazy to want a woman as damaged as me, with all this baggage. I can’t even sleep all night in my bed.
“Come on, sweetheart, let’s get what you need.” Smiley breaks me out of my thoughts. My eyes connect with his, and his face softens like he knows what I’m thinking.
An hour later, he has gotten me all the gear that I could possibly need. I can see that he is excited at the prospect of me fishing. Men and their toys.
He checks out, and I cringe at the price. I touch his arm to get his attention when he hands his credit card to his uncle. “I can pay for my own stuff.”
He gives me a look that says I shouldn’t bother asking. I roll my eyes and don’t bother trying to argue with him about it.
I start to take the bags off the counter, and he puts his hand on top of mine. “Baby, you’re not going to carry shit with me around.” I hold up my arms, smiling.
He yells over his shoulder, “Bye, Frank!” and I wave at his uncle and walk outside. I lay my head against his arm, hugging him. “Thank you.”
Lips press against the top of my head, shocking me slightly. “You’re more than welcome.”
Oh boy, my heart.
Around thirty minutes later, we pull up to a huge gate. He pushes a button on the back of the visor, the gate swings open, and he drives down a long driveway that goes deep into the forest.
I sit up further in my seat and, a minute later, his house comes into view. It’s a gorgeous cedar log home with a large garage, a huge field behind the house, and a barn.
This is my dream home.
“I love your home, Smiley. This is what I wanted to live in growing up.” My eyes are taking in everything; it’s perfect.
He helps me out of the truck and takes my hand, leading me up the steps to his beautiful house. I am so jealous. He puts his hand on a keypad, and the door clicks.
The inside of the house is just as amazing! The cedar is incorporated into the décor. I press my free hand to my chest. “It’s beautiful.” The living room is huge, with a fireplace in the center, constructed from round stones. The couches are dark leather, which makes everything else pop.
“I glad you love it,” he says. I walk into the huge kitchen, equipped with stainless steel appliances. It’s a kitchen that most chefs could only dream of.
I love to cook, and I can just picture myself in a kitchen like this. I turn around, looking at all of the cabinets, and that’s when I spot Smiley leaning against the door, looking smug.
“What?” I ask him.
He stands up straight. “I love that you love my house, baby.” He winks and I turn away to hide my embarrassment, because I was acting like a kid in a candy store.
He pulls me back against his chest. “Don’t be embarrassed. I love that you love my home because I want to see you here as much as possible.”
I can’t breathe. Did he just say that? Do I want to be here with him? Don’t overthink it, Adeline—you will drive yourself crazy.
Lips softly touch the back of my head, and he lets me go. “I already have all of the food ready.” He walks into his huge pantry and grabs a large YETI cooler. I know it’s heavy because I tried to buy myself one and couldn’t lug it to the vehicle.
“What do you want me to do?” I ask him, hating that he has packed all the food by himself.
He smiles and winks at me over his shoulder. “Park your ass on that chair, while I pack the side-by-side.” He nods to a chair beside the island in the middle of the kitchen.
I grab the bags from the counter. “I don’t sit and let people do the work.” I wink, holding the bags. “Now tell me where to go.”
He laughs. “Well, sassy ass, follow me.” He grabs the cooler and I follow him. The side-by-side is parked in the middle of the huge garage, which houses at least six motorcycles. There’s also a sleek silver sports car, a couple of four-wheelers, a boat, and some jet skis. Men and their toys.
He sets the cooler in the back of the side-by-side motorcycle and grabs my fishing gear while I stand there like a dunce, wringing my hands.
Smiley is like me, used to doing everything on his own. It feels weird when someone does something for me.
“Sweetheart, hop inside. I just have one more bag to get.” He doesn't stick around long enough for me to argue. I get in the passenger side of the vehicle. It’s eerie that all of this is happening. I am going on a ride with Smiley, then fishing. It’s still not sinking in.
He comes back out of the house with another bag and throws it into the back of the side-by-side, which is already filled with stuff. It’s like we are going to be gone for longer than a day.
He gets inside and starts up the side-by-side. I watch his muscles bunch as he situates himself. Goodness, he is so hot.
He looks up, catching me staring. He pulls down my seatbelt, which I didn’t know was there, and clicks it into place; then he does the same with his. “Next time I pick you up, you’re on the back of my bike.”
A thrill shoots through me at the idea of being so close to him, roaring through the streets. He backs out of the garage and drives to the back of his property.
“This property stretches out for hundreds of acres. Other members’ houses are on this property, surrounded by fences,” he informs me over the loud roar of the side-by-side.
I love the MC brotherhood—they are like family. The Devil Souls took care of my daughter, since Techy is part of the brotherhood, and they accepted her with open arms. They accepted me and gave me a chance to prove myself. Then I got a job that I love, taking care of the most important thing in their lives: their babies.
As we head deeper into the forest, he hits mud holes, and I laugh when mud covers my legs. He reaches forward and raises the windshield. He speeds up, the mud spraying up fast
er, and I grip the sides, laughing louder. This is so much fun!
He winds along the trail, which is actually really smooth with a few mud holes along the way that just make it more fun. A few minutes later, I see the lake and, all of a sudden, Smiley slams on the brakes hard.
He puts a hand on my chest, pressing me into the seat, and my breath comes out in a whoosh as a tree falls in front of us. If he hadn’t stopped, it would have fallen on top of us, more than likely killing us.
He turns to me and moves his hand from my chest to my jawbone. “Are you okay?” His eyes search my face.
I nod. “I’m okay.” I smile reassuringly. He put his hand on my chest, stopping me from slamming into the seatbelt—protecting me. The little things mean the most.
He drives around the tree, plowing through the weeds, and pulls to a stop in front of the lake. It’s beautiful and so peaceful. The water is still, and birds swoop overhead in the cooling fall air.
It’s perfect.
Smiley is so blessed to have this kind of life, and I am glad that I am getting to experience a small part of it today. I turn around to help Smiley unpack everything, but I find him leaning against the back of the vehicle, staring at me.
“Beautiful here isn’t it?” I look back at the water.
“Not as beautiful as you.”
I feel my face grow hot, and I am glad he can’t see—my back is turned. I am not used to compliments. Collecting myself, I turn around. Smiley has our fishing poles and the tackle box. “Come on, Ade.”
Ade. I love that he has a nickname for me. I follow him, trying not to stare at his ass but, in my defense, he is in a tight pair of wranglers and his flannel shirt is rolled up to his elbows, broadcasting his tattooed arms.
He sets the tackle box on the ground and takes out a container that says “live bait.” “Want me to bait your hook for you?” He smirks.
“I can do it.” I smirk right back, accepting the challenge. How hard can it be?
He opens the container and takes out a worm. I can do this. He hands me the fishing pole first and then holds out the worm. I gulp, straighten my back, and take the worm from him. “How do I put it on there?”
“Just thread it on.”
Okay, I can do this. The worm is wiggling in my fingers and I shiver, vomit crawling up my throat. I take the end of the hook and pierce one end of the worm. I repeat the process again and again until it’s completely on the hook.
“Good job, sweet girl.” Smiley’s praise makes me feel ten feet tall. I grin and drop the hook. He baits his hook way more quickly than I did, and we walk to a dock perched in the middle of the lake. Smiley puts his fishing pole against a bench on the end of the dock. “Let me show you how to throw out the line.” He presses his front against my back.
He takes my left hand and presses it against the rod, right below the first eye, so that I’m holding the string. With my other hand he opens the metal clasp. He lifts my arms. “Now, when you’re ready to throw it out, let go of the string.”
I throw it forward just a little bit and let go, and it soars toward the middle of the lake. “I did it!”
“Close the metal,” he says and I do as he asked.
“Now, when you get a tug, give a jerk and then reel it in.” He takes a step back and throws out his pole.
I get a tug on my line. I pull up, like he asked, and start to reel. “Oh my god! I got a fish!” I scream—probably too loudly—and he laughs, moving closer. I reel it in, the fish fighting me the whole way. I lift it out of the water.
“Damn, that’s a huge bass.” He puts down his pole and pulls the fish off the hook. “Here is how you hold it, grab the lip.”
I shake my hand nervously; then I grab the fish and Smiley lets go.
Smiley
The moment I let go of the fish, she looks up at me with a fucking blinding smile. “I did it.” I can hear the excitement in her voice. Her face is completely lit up. Happiness is written all over her, and I did that. She is always on guard, but right now I get to see the real her, and she is fucking beautiful. “Good job, beautiful.”
Her grin widens even more. “What do you want me to do with him?” she asks.
“Put him back in the water.”
She walks over to the side of the dock and bends over with her ass in the fucking air, and it takes everything in me not to fall to my fucking knees at the sight of her heart-shaped ass. It’s like it’s made just for me.
My dick is fucking hard at this point. I adjust myself before she can see. She puts the fish in the water, and it swims away. She looks at the hook on her fishing pole, and the worm is still intact. She puts her hands exactly where I told her to and throws the pole back and out. She is a quick learner. She looks back and winks. “One to zero.”
I laugh at her cockiness. I’d let her catch every fucking fish in this lake to keep that smile on her face.
Adeline
A couple of hours later, I have caught around thirty fish: bass, crappie, and bluegill. Smiley has caught around twenty; I am smoking him. He laughs every time I catch a fish and, at this point, I am taking them off the hook myself. The bluegill stabbed me, but I got the hang of holding it correctly with Smiley’s help. He let me know that he is here to help if needed, but he lets me teach myself. I love his patience.
When it’s time for dinner, Smiley makes steaks, and they are nothing short of amazing. It’s around eight o’clock, and the sun is going down. We stare at the beautiful lake, the orange sun shining across it. The early evening air is chilly. I forgot to bring a jacket, of course.
Smiley walks to the side-by-side and comes back with a blanket. He sits beside me and wraps me in the blanket. I love his thoughtfulness; it’s like he is in tune with everything about me.
“Thank you.”
He smiles and puts his arm around me, pulling my head against his chest. This is amazing. Butterflies swarm in my stomach, and his hand moves up and down my back, leaving chills in its wake. This has been the best day. “How amazing would it be to stare at the stars all night.”
His hand freezes. “I have a tent if you want to stay out here overnight.” He seems hesitant to mention it.
Do I want to do that? Should I do that? I honestly don’t want to leave tonight. I am having the best time, and I am off work tomorrow. “Do you want to?” I ask.
“I don’t want you to leave, so I’d be more than happy spending the night out here with you.”
Okay then.
Oh my god, I am really doing this. I am really spending the night in a tent with Smiley. Nerves rattle my body. I am throwing caution to the wind, and I am going to live.
“Let me get the tent and everything ready before it gets dark,” he says. As he walks to the side-by-side, I watch his ass in those tight jeans. He is very built for a man who is hitting fifty. He looks like he doesn’t have an ounce of fat on him.
“You need me to do anything?” I ask.
“I got this, sweetheart. Just relax.”
I do as he asks, enjoying the view, and boy is it amazing. I take out my phone and shoot Alisha a text letting her know that I am camping overnight with Smiley so she doesn't worry.
She texts back immediately saying okay and that she needs details tomorrow. I laugh and put the phone down, just wanting to be in the moment without a phone glued to my hand.
In a matter of minutes Smiley has the tent up, with sleeping bags and a blow-up mattress inside—this is much more than I was expecting. He finally settles down beside me, warming me instantly.
“This is one thing that has been taken off my bucket list,” I inform him. I have a bucket list of things, including camping, that I always wanted to do but never got a chance.
“Well, I am glad that I get to mark that off your bucket list.” He winks and I smile, laying my head on his shoulder and staring at the lake. “I am glad that I get to spend this time with you,” he says softly, and I smile and put my hand on his bare forearm. The skin beneath my hand is warm, his muscl
es are firm, and I can feel the veins beneath my fingers.
“I am glad to be here with you.” Right now I just feel safe and content. There is an easiness in my soul—it’s hard to explain.
His arm curls around me, his hand resting on my face. His lips touch my temple, and I close my eyes. Not once has he touched my lips, but this means so much more and I feel respected. His hand doesn't leave my face as we look at each other. His eyes go straight to my lips. Do I want him to kiss me? Yeah, I kind of do. I lick my lips, nodding slightly.
He grins widely before placing his lips on mine.
Oh, wow. My stomach dips and I am on edge the moment he touches me. His finger lightly strokes my cheek.
I move my mouth with his, coming a little closer. He takes my cue, moving his hand from my face to the back of my head, taking control of the kiss. This is everything that I thought it would be and more. His lips move over mine, softly tugging them in a way that isn’t too aggressive but lets me know he’s all man. I can’t believe that I am actually kissing him right now.
A breathtaking minute later, we finally break the kiss. I suck in a deep breath, trying to calm my erratic heart. Smiley kisses my forehead and pulls me to his chest. “You know, Adeline, you’re my woman. That kiss just fucking sealed the deal.”
“I want to be your woman,” I tell him bluntly, not letting my head override everything else. I know that if I pull away I will regret it for the rest of my life. If I come out, in the end, with my heart broken, at least I can say that I tried my best to live my life as well as I possibly could.
“Fucking good, Ade.” He gives me that amazing smile and I smile back, my heart happy, and I feel like I am floating. “Come here.”
I scoot back over and lay my head on his chest, and he pulls the blanket back over me. I close my eyes because he is so sweet, thoughtful, and caring. It’s the simple things, like him covering me up, that mean a lot to me. I sigh and sink deeper, loving the feel of his fingers stroking my hair.
“What is one thing you want in this life?” Smiley asks.
I open my eyes and stare at the ground, thinking. One thing I want more than anything is happiness—that is what I want. I don’t want to feel alone anymore or struggle with anxiety and stress. I want to be able to go to sleep without feeling like the world is resting on my shoulders. “I want to be happy,” I tell him, my voice barely above a whisper.