by Jenika Snow
Chapter 4
Beau
“Fuck!” I growl before I can stop myself. It’s a kneejerk reaction and the word springs forth the minute I see Lexi. I watch her flinch at what I said and I instantly regret it. The thing is, when I’m around her I can’t seem to stop myself from being an asshole. It’s my way to push her away, to pretend she’s nothing more to me than Brooks’ little sister. I’ve spent my life pushing her away, it seems. “What are you doing here, Lexi?”
“Charming as ever,” she mutters. She gets up off the ground, turning away from me. I bite down a moan when she bends over and her ass stretches against her jeans. Sweet mother of God, there’s not a woman alive that can fill out a pair of pants like Lexi.
She turns around, holding a hammer in one hand. I should probably worry she’s going to use it on me. Lord knows I’ve given her more than enough reason to.
“What are you doing here?” I ask again.
“Gee, I don’t know, Einstein. Camping?” There’s a bite in her voice.
“Camping?”
“That’s what I said,” she mumbles, walking toward the heap of material lying on the ground that I think is supposed to be her tent.
“Lexi.”
“What?” she asks, looking over at me.
“You don’t camp. Hell, you cringe at the thought of using a public bathroom, let alone going out in the woods.” I look around. She’s alone. She came out here alone? I don’t fucking like that.
“You don’t know me anymore, Beau. You never did, really,” she says, avoiding my eyes.
She’s wrong, of course. If she had any idea just how much I know about her, she would freak out. There was a time in my life where I lived for daily updates about her. Shit, maybe I still do, but I need to stop. Lexi is not mine and she never will be. This week is all about starting fresh and putting the past behind me. Just because the biggest problem with my past has shown up here, nothing has changed. It’s just a sign from the cosmic universe that moving on is long past due.
“You still with that Eddie boy?” I ask her. I remember she was with some loser named Edward Winslow the Third. Brooks would bitch about the little asshole daily, and I’d grit my teeth thinking of Lexi with someone other than me. He never fails to remind you of the third part either—which is rather stupid, since the dude used to work as a night manager at the local 7/11. Why she ever saddled herself with that waste of space I will never know.
She snorts. “No,” she says firmly, trying to ignore me and look at the mess that is her tent. She’s staring at the metal pole that loops in the ends of the tent like it’s a creature from outer space. I’d laugh if my heart wasn’t beating in my chest so hard that it’s painful.
“You finally kicked the guy to the curb?” I ask her, alternating between hoping I’m right and praying I’m wrong. It was hard enough to stay away from Lexi before. If she’s single… Fuck.
“We broke up, if you must know.”
“Brooks never mentioned it,” I mumble, more to myself than to her.
“Why in the world would he mention it to you? Besides, I’m not sure he knows.”
“Why wouldn’t your brother know?” I rub the back of my neck, hating that the fact of Lexi being single is getting to me so deeply.
“It may surprise you, Beau, but my brother doesn’t really want to hear about my personal life.”
“You can tell me all about it,” I tell her with a grin, doing my best to not let her know that the news of her being single has shaken me.
“Why? Do you need to take notes?” she asks, sweetly.
“Trust me, honey, notes on your personal life is the last thing I need,” I tell her, getting annoyed at the thought of her with anyone. Shit, all I can think about is showing her exactly how much I want her … as long as Brooks never found out about it. Christ, I can’t camp beside Lexi; there’s no way I’m going to survive.
She stretches the tent pole she’s holding. Too bad it’s the wrong part of the tent and she doesn’t have the pole set.
I bite back a laugh when once she has it stretched she takes a step back to admire her handiwork and the tent collapses in a sorrowful, sad mess. I look up at the clouds in the sky and sigh. If I don’t get a move on with my own tent, we’re both going to be sitting out in the rain. If I do get my tent up, Lexi will probably wind up in it with me… which will be a different kind of hell.
Chapter 5
Lexi
I stand back and watch as Beau puts together my tent. It’s safer this way. I’ll end up just screwing something up. He finally came over after me cursing like a sailor for the last hour, trying to put the damn thing together. I had been about to say screw it, that I would sleep in my car, or even head into town and stay at that rinky-dink little motel I passed coming up here, but Beau stepped in and saved the day, something he is good at.
I don’t know why I thought camping would be a good idea. And to make matters worse, Beau will be in the site right beside me, like fate is trying to say something. Or maybe it is wishful thinking on my part, like I want things to just fall into place.
“Okay, you’re ready to go.” He stands and wipes his hands on his jeans, dusting off the dirt. The sun is already starting to set and I feel really bad that he’s been working on my stuff instead of getting his own set up. Although he got his tent set up for the evening already, thankfully.
But still, I want to do something to say thank you. “Can I make you some dinner, as a thank you for helping me out?“
He grins, flashing a set of straight white teeth. “I’m not gonna turn down some food, especially if you’re making for me.”
I feel my cheeks heat and turn away before he sees. For the next ten minutes I set everything up, get the little propane stove ready, grab the can of beans and a can of fruit. I even brought some burgers that I’ll grill. It didn’t even occur to me to light a fire, but I look over my shoulder and see Beau is already on it. Although dinner won’t be a feast, it will be a warm meal and hopefully things can get a little less awkward between us with some conversation.
Another twenty minutes passes and dinner is ready, the fire is roaring, and Beau has two foldout chairs placed around the pit. I walk over to him, a plate in each hand, and give him one. I see he’s brought over a cooler, and he pops the lid and wraps his fingers around the necks of two beer bottles. He hands me one and I take it with a grateful smile.
We eat in silence, me just staring at the flames licking over the logs, very aware that Beau is sitting right next to me. Although I’m hot, it has nothing to do with the fire in front of me.
His presence makes me feel very self-aware. I sneak a glance over at him and see that he’s already watching me. I feel my face heat even further and look away quickly.
“Tell me what’s been going on, Lexi.”
Hearing him say my name does all kinds of things to me. He was the first person to ever start calling me Lexi. After that it just kind of caught on with my friends, even Brooks. I shrug, still not looking at him, still not able to make eye contact.
“Nothing really.” That’s the truth. After he and Brooks left for the military I basically puttered around. I finished school and got my associates degree in business, but I’m not exactly using it.
I look Beau in the eyes and this strong feeling overcomes me. I want to tell him how much I love him, want to tell him that him being away all these years was hard. I want to ask him how long he’s been back. I want to ask him why he didn’t come see me.
But even though all these questions are running through my mind, I know I’ll never ask them. I’m too afraid, too frightened of his reaction, of his response. I’ve dreamed so many times about telling him, and he reciprocated my feelings, pulled me in close and told me he loved me. Those were the dreams of a silly girl, though, and I told myself that every time.
But what if? What if I was finally honest and the attraction wasn’t just one-way?
Chapter 6
Beau
&n
bsp; I finish up my food, feeling disappointed. I hate that things between us are stilted. I realize it’s partly my fault. Lexi is still upset because I rejected her after the kiss all those years ago. It’s probably for the best she thinks that way.
“I guess I’ll go finish setting up my camp, Lexi. Thanks for dinner.”
“You’re leaving?” she asks and she sounds surprised. It can’t have escaped her notice that we’re barely talking to each other.
“Yeah I need to get my camp ready or I’ll be sleeping on the ground.” I grin. “The weather report predicted some heavy rain coming in late tonight.”
“It did?” she asks, and it’s clear she had no idea. What kind of person plans a camping trip without checking the weather? I could have laughed. She’s too damn cute.
I pinch the bridge of my nose and hold my head down. Does Brooks even know what his sister is up to? How could he allow her to be out here camping all alone, without any protection? He didn’t want me to touch her, then the least the asshole could have done was to make sure she didn’t do stupid stuff like this. She needs a man to take care of her.
“Yeah. It did. When most people decide to camp, Lexi, they check the weather so they are sure to be prepared.” I exhale a breath of frustration and let it go. Lexi is not the kind of girl to like the outdoors. She’ll be gone tomorrow and this won’t matter.
“Anyway, it’s not like you’re really talking to me, so I’m going to go,” I growl, turning into an instant asshole because she needs a man to take care of her, and I know it can’t be me.
“I was talking! Maybe you’re just pouting because I’m not falling at your feet like most girls do.”
“I didn’t realize you’d been watching what other girls do,” I respond, looking at her. I’m watching her closely so I can see the minute that the flush enters her face, even when she moves, putting away her trash, trying to avoid my stare.
“I wasn’t. Not really. I just know what Brooks tells me.”
That answer annoys me instantly. Hell, Brooks hasn’t seen me since I was discharged. He’s still living the life I thought I would. Deployed overseas and well on his way to being a general. There’s a part of me that resents him for that, but he’s my best friend. He’s not responsible for the shambles my life is in. Brooks may have made it clear his sister was off limits, even if he didn’t know I wanted her, and I might be honoring that, but shit, I knew Lexi cared about me. I could see it in her eyes and the way she looked at me. I never wanted to hurt her—even inadvertently. Lexi has always been in my heart.
Which can only mean that Brooks has been spreading lies to drive Lexi further away from me.
“Do you believe everything you’re told?”
“Brooks wouldn’t lie to me. Besides, it’s not like it is any of my business. You made it clear how you felt about me years ago, Beau.”
“Just because I told you that I…that we shouldn’t…”
“You told me not to kiss you anymore, that I was a kid, even though I wasn’t. You told me I wasn’t your type. Trust me, Beau, I remember. I got the message back then loud and clear, and I get the message now. Thanks for helping me with my tent. I think I’ll turn in.”
“Why does everything with you end in a fight?” I growl. “It’s good you’ll be leaving tomorrow. I came up here to get peace, not more stress.”
“I’m not leaving tomorrow. I have this campground rented for the whole week and that’s exactly how long I’m staying.”
“You? You’re planning on staying out in the wild all week? No fucking way.”
“What’s so hard to believe about that?”
“You forget I know you, buttercup.”
“Don’t call me that.”
“You used to love it when I called you buttercup.”
“I don’t anymore. I’ve changed. You don’t know me anymore, Beau.”
“I know you don’t like living without modern conveniences. I know your idea of roughing it is spending the night without internet, not indoor plumbing.”
“Like I said, Beau Sterling, you don’t know me anymore,” she says, dismissing me without looking back and making her way to her tent.
I don’t know what pisses me off more. It could be the fact that she’s walking away from me, it could be the fact she asked me to stop calling her my nickname, or it could even be the coolness she’s treating me with. I think, however, it has more to do with the fact that she’s right. I don’t really know Lexi anymore. I’ve been spending my life pushing her away and avoiding her. I didn’t want to. I did it out of respect for Brooks and his wishes, but I still did it.
I’ve regretted it every day, but more so right now than ever.
“I’ll tell you what I do know.”
“What’s that?” she asks, not bothering to turn around and sounding very bored.
“I know that cheap little pink tent you bought isn’t going to stand up to the thunderstorms we’re supposed to get. If you don’t leave tomorrow you’re going to end up really wet and cold.”
I watch her body tighten and jerk with my words. Still, she doesn’t turn around.
“Goodnight, Mr. Sterling,” she says and disappears behind the closing flap of her tent. A minute later I hear the zipper move on the door.
I frown. When she called me Mr. Sterling, all I wanted to do was bend her over my knees and spank her ass.
I warned her. That’s all I can do. I wasn’t kidding about the tent, nor the rain headed our way. She’s going to end up wet, cold and miserable…
Or worse, she doesn’t leave and I forget all the reasons I need to stay away from her, and then make sure she’s wet, hot and completely filled…. with me.
Chapter 7
Lexi
It is the crack of thunder that wakes me up. My tent is shaking, the wind howling outside fierce, violent. A droplet of water falls onto my head. I gasp and sit up, seeing rain coming through my cheap tent. This is the one thing I purchased on my own. Everything else I got from Brooks’ storage unit. I bought a cheap, yet pretty tent, and now I am paying for it.
I grab my purse and start looking for my car keys. Looks like I am sleeping in my car tonight. And of course, because my luck totally sucks, I can’t find the keys.
Of course.
Another flash of lightning causes the interior of my tent to illuminate. Seconds later the thunder booms.
I cry out on instinct then immediately slap a hand over my mouth. What the hell was I thinking coming out here? No way I can last a week.
More lightning and thunder ensues, but because I can’t find my keys I’m stuck. I wrap the blanket around me and put the material over my head, the water now coming through the tent. God, I cannot believe I bought such a shit item.
“Lexi?” I hear Beau’s voice right outside my tent, and part of me wants to ignore him, wants to be proud and act like I didn’t totally screw this up. “Lexi, buttercup, I know you’re getting soaked in there. Come out and get in my tent until the storm goes away.”
I’m tempted to say no, but another splash of water seeps through the blanket and onto my head. I start shivering. I grit my teeth, grab my purse, and head out of the tent. Beau is standing on the other side with an umbrella, a grin on his face. Damn, I hate when he’s right.
“Come on, sweetheart.” He holds his hand out, and even though he pissed me off earlier, I find myself slipping my hand in his much bigger one. He closes his fingers around mine and together we go to his tent.
The rain is really coming down hard, the sound of it beating against the tent almost deafening. His tent is spacious, and as I sit in one corner and watch as he digs around for another lantern he’s got in his bag, I can’t help but appraise him.
Beau is so attractive, big and strong in that hardworking kind of way. His biceps flex and I feel my body heat. I grow wet between my legs, and my nipples become so hard I’m surprised they don’t rip through my T-shirt.
I grab the material and pull it away from my body. The fabric
is slightly damp from the rain, and the fact that I’m not wearing a bra just now hits me. I feel my face heat, know I’m probably red as a tomato. I reach for one of his blankets and pull it up to cover my chest just as he faces me. He looks at me for a second, cocks an eyebrow, and a smirk covers his face.
Damn, he either can read me well, or he already saw the outline of my nipples when we first got into the tent. I glance away, not wanting to look at him because some pretty filthy things are running through my head right now.
He doesn’t say anything, thankfully, and a second later the tent gets brighter as he turns on the lantern. For long seconds we sit there in silence, and when he starts rifling through his bag again, he produces a dry shirt and a pair of sweats.
“Here.” He hands the items over to me. “You’re soaked and you’ll get sick if you stay in those damp things.”
I look at him like he’s grown two heads.
He exhales. “Lexi, we’re adults. I’ll look away if you want, but change out of the damn clothes and don’t be stubborn about it.”
What I’m really thinking about is getting naked in front of him. So many things have gone through my head over the years, things I imaged—fantasized—about doing with Beau. I want to be his, want his hands on me, his mouth on mine. I want the world to know that he loves me, the same way I love him. But those are just that … fantasies. It’s not reality, and I really need to get that through my head.
I don’t bother to wait until he turns around. I drop the blanket and lift the shirt above my head. We are adults, as he says, and it’s not like he’s never seen a pair of breasts before. I could almost chuckle at the shocked way he looks when he sees me getting dressed, before he turns around. When I have the shirt on I go for the pants next. He does turn his head away then and I grin.