“Okay, well, who’s the team?” asked Blue Star, who appreciated that last point. He wasn’t worth as much as some new hot shot super but as team leader he had to be paid the most or it would undermine his authority.
“We’ve locked in Seawolf, White Knight, Cosmic Kid, and Starfish, who’s expected to be back in the field in a few weeks,” said Dr. Sterling. “We hope to conclude contract renegotiations with Keystone soon and we’re also signing Nova Woman, a former team member.”
“It’s a decent team,” said Blue Star warily. “Cosmic Kid is a lot like a young Mr. Awesome. I knew Ben, not well, but we hung out at a few conferences - a great guy.”
“Yes, he was. I know he would be proud that we had to go to a four-time Hall of Famer to replace him as team leader,” said Dr. Hodges.
“He never was inducted in the Hall of Fame, was he?” asked Blue Star, who felt a pang of guilt. Not all legends got respect, some just disappeared.
“No,” admitted Dr. Hodges. “I’ve been working for years to get the 2002 West Pacific Team inducted, but it’s been an uphill battle.”
“Right now we’re focusing on the future,” said Dr. Sterling briskly. “West Pacific is poised to dominate the West Coast Conference again and you can help make it happen. Cosmic Kid is the future of the franchise and we want you to help mentor him and get him ready to take over the reins in a few years.”
“So he’s my replacement,” said Blue Star.
“Yes, but you need to get him ready for that,” said Dr. Sterling. “Our legacy is not what we do but what we leave behind.”
“I’m not quite done yet,” said Blue Star with annoyance.
“Which is why we want you to head up West Pacific Supers,” said Dr. Hodges with a disapproving look at Dr. Sterling. “We want West Pacific Supers to be the cap on your distinguished career.”
“I’m in,” said Blue Star. “I’ll mentor the kid, but I need to know any secret identities and other team secrets – every team has them and I don’t want to be blindsided.”
“The only secret identity is White Knight and he has agreed that you can be informed of that,” said Dr. Hodges. “We’ll also try to get you up to speed on West Pacific Supers, its history and all that, though we don’t have many secrets.”
“We also do intend to hit the ground running against those who attacked the team so be prepared,” said Dr. Sterling as she stood up. Clearly, the meeting was at an end.
Blue Star nodded and shook their hands again. He dropped in his chair as they left. West Pacific wasn’t the Infinity Team or the Paragons, but it could be. There were some heroics left in him, he could feel it. At the least, he would bring those who killed Mr. Awesome to justice. It would be what he would want if he died, hmm, probably something he should put in his will, which he always updated at the beginning of a new contract. He would need to add some memento for Susan, who he would need to break up with tonight. West Pacific was close enough for a long-distance relationship, but what he wanted was a completely fresh start. That was always best.
Chapter 10
9:32 a.m., Thursday, April 4th, 2013
Supersonic Cat Conference Room, WPS HQ
West Pacific, CA
$500 was Cosmic Kid’s only consolation for surviving the last agonizing thirty minutes. Stephen had calculated his salary out to $1,000 every hour, 24 hours a day, all year long. The figure understated various tax obligations but it was accurate enough to put things in perspective. The question though was whether $500 was sufficient compensation for what he had just experienced. The loss in brain cells alone was probably worth many times that amount, but this was simply the price to pay for being a professional superhero.
“When confronting a paranormal phenomenon, our basic plan is ACT: assess, contain, and terminate,” droned Major Dagan of the West Pacific Police Department as he continued to read each slide of his PowerPoint presentation. Cosmic Kid was pretty certain that PowerPoint presentations violated the Geneva Conventions or something. He had also committed the cardinal sin of PowerPoint presentations: he had read the background material beforehand.
Major Dagan was briefing West Pacific Supers on the procedures and operations of the WPPD, from their afterschool basketball conference to how they would handle a weapon of mass destruction. Interesting stuff, especially if one had read the 71 pages of supplemental materials provided by Major Dagan that morning. However, PowerPoint presentations weren’t interesting - they were all about the distillation of real knowledge into bullet points deprived of context and substance. Major Dagan was a master of PowerPoint; it was almost Zen-like how he distilled 71 pages into meaningless bits of information that belonged on fortune cookies.
Cosmic Kid checked his HoloBerry while Major Dagan launched into the city’s weapons of mass destruction response plan, which began with a slide of a multicolored flowchart that summarized the theoretical response of the city’s first responders and emergency services to various Armageddon scenarios. No messages from Danny since the Super Draft. She had ended up being picked by the Savannah Seven after West Pacific traded for a higher Draft pick and took him instead of her. He had been too busy to make amends; more accurately, he was annoyed that she was mad at him when he hadn’t done anything wrong. In the Super Industry things changed all the time and it wasn’t like he had a choice in the matter.
A message from Epiphany said simply: In orientation - sexual harassment and leaving food in the team refrigerator are both felonies in Baltimore. He smiled and sent back a message: In team briefing, supposedly nuclear attacks are bad though scientific community is divided on the issue. His ‘date’ with Epiphany had been perhaps the most mentally exhausting experience of his life, but he guessed they were now friends. He wasn’t even sure if they were dating or not, but they did have some sort of relationship, though he had no idea what it was. Dealing with Epiphany over text messages was actually pleasant.
“Cosmic Kid, you should be paying attention,” whispered Blue Star who was sitting next to him in a stylish dark blue suit. Seawolf was the only one in the meeting in costume.
“I’m multitasking,” whispered back Cosmic Kid as he went red in the face from embarrassment and anger. Camille wasn’t taking notes but doodling a menagerie of poorly drawn animals in capes. Hell, White Knight and Keystone weren’t even here and Starfish, who was joining them via teleconference from his hospital bed, appeared to have fallen asleep. It wasn’t fair – he was the only one who had done the reading, but because he was the ‘kid’ he was being reprimanded.
“It is always better to do one thing well than two things poorly,” whispered Blue Star disapprovingly.
“That was the standard in the 70s; nowadays it’s better to do three things well rather than five things poorly – inflation you know,” whispered back Cosmic Kid who was not in the mood to be chided like he was a super teen, even by a living legend like Blue Star.
“This is important material,” said Blue Star a little louder.
Cosmic Kid looked up at the current slide that contained bullet points with pointless facts about how many mutants and bomb-sniffing dogs were employed by the WPPD. “No, it’s not.”
“We need to be on the same page as the WPPD during a crisis,” whispered Blue Star irritably.
“I read the report,” retorted Cosmic Kid. “We aren’t going to thwart some supervillain or extremist group with PowerPoint slides, unless we print them up on sheets of titanium and make little throwing stars out of them.”
“You’re not respecting our guest,” hissed Blue Star. “You need to at least pretend to be listening like I am!”
“Boys, is there a problem?” asked Dr. Sterling with a stern look as silence swept the room. “Both of you should be paying attention. This is important material.”
“What? I’m paying attention,” said Blue Star defensively.
“I’m not,” said Cosmic Kid. Everyone turned and looked at him with a host of disapproving looks mingled with surprise. Starfish distinctly
could be heard chuckling over the video feed; apparently he hadn’t been asleep after all. He was very mutant in appearance: shaped like a normal human, but with bright orange, rubbery skin.
“If I may ask, Cosmic Kid, why aren’t you paying attention?” asked Dr. Sterling icily.
“Because… I was distracting him with some questions about how the Ultimate League dealt with paranormal crises,” said Blue Star with a warning look at Cosmic Kid.
“Nope, I’m not paying attention because this is a waste of time,” said Cosmic Kid, who was touched by Blue Star’s attempt to give him cover. He probably should have taken it; his plan had been to slide under the radar his first day, but since he was an ‘arrogant ass’ according to spotthespandex.com he might as well embrace it.
Dr. Sterling smiled dangerously. “Please explain why this is a waste of our time?”
“Because we’re all literate adults. The WPPD has spent hundreds of hours compiling the various reports filled with useful information that we were given this morning. Unfortunately, because Major Dagan knows none of us are going to read the whole report, he has spent a few more hours preparing this presentation to distill all that useful information into a PowerPoint presentation that effectively means nothing.”
“It’s important to distill information,” said Dr. Sterling.
“Sure, but come on,” said Cosmic Kid. “It’s like ‘ACT’ to deal with paranormal crises. You analyze, contain, and terminate the paranormal event causing the crisis, but that’s like moronically obvious. To actually do it you need to have internalized the underlying information to execute those bullet points. I mean, if the Pharaoh just needed to know ‘ACT’ then Moses wouldn’t have led his people out of Egypt, right? Good thing you can’t have acronyms with hieroglyphics or history might have turned out quite a bit differently. Seriously, if we have a real paranormal crisis like a zombie plague, frogs falling from the sky, or who knows what, I don’t think the city will take solace in the fact that West Pacific Supers watched a PowerPoint presentation instead of actually reading and learning the underlying source material. Major Dagan has more important things to do than helping some supers cram for a crisis.”
Seawolf smirked approvingly. “I completely agree. In fact, I’d be curious to know who actually read the report besides Cosmic Kid and myself.” She gave Camille a knowing smile and Camille scowled back at her.
Starfish chuckled again. “Oh, I read the report but I truly enjoy PowerPoint presentations. There is an art and majesty to them that defies explanation. It just makes me all warm inside to read bullet points.”
“It’s never a waste of time to coordinate between law enforcement institutions,” said Blue Star, who looked tired; no doubt this was not how he had envisioned the first team meeting.
“Yes, but it is a waste of time for someone to spoon feed us information we should be able to process ourselves,” said Cosmic Kid. “I’m sure there are more important things we could be doing with this time.”
“Such as?” asked Dr. Sterling.
“Perhaps we could have a briefing on the investigation into the attacks against the team,” said Cosmic Kid. “I’ve gotten all my information from the news and think a proper briefing for the new members on what happened and how the investigation is proceeding would be very useful.”
“I agree,” said Starfish. “Major Dagan, who tried to kill me?”
“That investigation is proceeding, but I’m not at liberty to discuss it with the team at this time,” said Major Dagan.
“Why?” asked Cosmic Kid.
Starfish laughed, revealing two rows of perfectly even white teeth. “Because the WPPD probably suspects someone with ties to the team was involved with the attack. Isn’t that right, Major Dagan?”
“I think it’s best if we just continue with the PowerPoint presentation,” said Blue Star hurriedly.
“Wait!” Camille said angrily. “You’re saying that the police suspect someone working for the team killed Awesome and Meltdown? I thought it was the Infinite Circle or some supervillain - Cosmic Kid’s right, we should be talking about that and planning reprisals.”
“We don’t suspect any of you or the senior staff were involved with the attack, but it is possible that whoever perpetrated the attack had help from someone who works for the team,” said Major Dagan. “However, the main reason I’m not sharing our information with you is that I don’t want anyone on the team going vigilante looking for revenge or… reprisals.”
“The WPPD was handling security for the Costume Launch,” snapped Gabrielle Fox, the team’s PR director. “Maybe we’ll have to go vigilante if your people are corrupt and can’t handle their job.”
The room went silent and Cosmic Kid felt a little guilty for how poorly the meeting was going. Major Dagan though seemed impassive, or probably was trying really hard to be impassive while he collected his thoughts for a response.
“I love the honesty in this meeting,” interjected Starfish. “Can I be honest too? Camille, you look good for a woman your age and really should go back to the mini-skirt.”
“What?” said Camille, blushing. “I don’t think that’s appropriate, Starfish.”
“We are investigating ourselves as well as the team,” Major Dagan finally said. “The WPPD is taking this investigation very seriously and is focused on doing the best job possible in the situation.”
“Everyone is investigating everyone else and themselves,” said Dr. Sterling. “Lots and lots of investigating going on, but Major Dagan I’m afraid we should wrap up your presentation for the day. Thank you very much for coming to see us.”
“It was a pleasure,” said Major Dagan as he turned off the ill-fated PowerPoint and packed up his things.
Dr. Sterling looked around the room coolly. “I have a few things to discuss with the good Major, but I’ll be back shortly so none of you had better go anywhere.” With that she escorted Major Dagan out of the room.
“Cosmic Kid, you might end up traded by the end of the day,” Starfish laughed.
“I… I just didn’t think this was the best use of our time,” said Cosmic Kid.
Seawolf nodded. “I agree. These meetings are always a waste of time.”
“Perhaps,” said Blue Star, “but it was a chance for Major Dagan, our liaison with the WPPD, to interact with the team. It was the first time he met with a lot of us. I think we made a poor impression.”
“We weren’t interacting with Major Dagan; we were sitting around while he read a bedtime story to us,” said Cosmic Kid. “If we want to get to know him then we should have lunch with him or something.”
“I like that,” Starfish smiled broadly. “We could have a team picnic and invite Dagan.”
Camille forced a smile. “We used to do team parties.”
“Yes, and those were such a success,” said Seawolf dryly.
“Great, we should hold one at your leaky lighthouse!” exclaimed Starfish. “I’ve heard such fascinating stories about the last party, though that was before my time. I’m dying to see the place.”
Seawolf looked hurt, though Starfish didn’t appear to notice.
“No, like a real team party,” said Camille. “Remember, Matthew used to hold them at his house?”
“Matthew, is it?” said Starfish with a tone of mock surprise. “Well, look who’s on a first-name basis with the big man himself!”
“I was just saying… ” began Camille defensively as Dr. Sterling reentered the room.
“That did not go well,” she said. “Cosmic Kid, we’re paying you enough that you can sit through a damn PowerPoint presentation without acting like a petulant teenager.”
“Ouch!” said Starfish. “This is why I just sit and be quiet.”
“I think Cosmic Kid has a point,” said Seawolf. “Everyone should have read the report beforehand and we could have had a more productive meeting.”
“Some of us have been kind of busy today to get around to reading a hundred page police report that
was only given to us this morning,” snapped Camille.
“They probably didn’t want anyone reading the report, that’s why they waited till the last minute to send it to us,” mused Starfish. “The truth is the WPPD doesn’t like to share information with us and keeps us at arm’s length. Now that Dagan knows some of us are reading the reports, he’ll probably stop sending them to us.”
“Was there anything we should know in the report if the WPPD was hiding something from us?” asked Blue Star.
“Well, Dagan was certainly underplaying some of the concerns in the report about centralization of criminal organizations and the potential ineffectiveness of some WPPD initiatives,” said Cosmic Kid. “Most of the negative information was concealed in the footnotes and cites to other materials and studies. It was a comprehensive report though; whoever compiled it does good work.”
“The WPPD uses an outside research service for reports like that one,” said Dr. Sterling.
“We should probably use them too,” Blue Star suggested.
“We do – it’s our research department that assembled the report, which has been available to the team for the last three weeks,” said Dr. Sterling, rolling her eyes. “Dagan isn’t hiding anything; he’s just trying to get a little useful information into your thick skulls. We spend millions on research and other support activities and I would be thrilled if you all started reading reports, but most of you won’t, so as Cosmic Kid said, we spoon feed you useful information. You may be literate adults but most of you are lazy literate adults.”
“It would be a better use of our time to schedule in mandatory reading and research time instead of, let’s say, publicity work,” said Seawolf.
“Publicity work pays for the reports,” said Gabrielle with a menacing glare.
“The Ultimate League would have brainstorming sessions over pizza where the team would mull over problems and issues,” said Cosmic Kid. “We would even sometimes invite law enforcement, government officials, and the like if appropriate.”
West Pacific Supers: Rising Tide Page 12