by Lauren Dane
She laughed as she brushed her hair. “We’re going to be in a bar, it’s not like there’ll even be an opportunity for that.”
“Don’t mock. You know exactly what I’m saying.”
“I do.” And she did. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to, she totally did. But if he wanted back in her pants, he had to stop this silly business and admit they had a relationship. She wasn’t angling for a declaration of love or forever devotion, though just in her head as she gave herself this little pep talk, she could admit she loved him.
She borrowed one of Zoe’s shirts. Snug with the perfect v neck. Her boobs looked fantastic. She glossed up her lips, tousled her hair just right and changed into her favorite jeans.
Wren wanted him back. And she would do her damnedest this side of humiliation to make that happen.
Which meant she walked into the Alibi Room an hour and five minutes later, looking awesome. Even for lunch on a weekend the place was plenty full. But he was tall and the only one with a Mohawk in the whole place so she headed in his direction.
He stood when she got to the table. She didn’t hug him though, instead she tipped her chin, hung up her bag and jacket and sat.
“I ordered some appetizers. I know you have dinner, but it’s a while away.”
When the server brought the food, Wren ordered a Moscow Mule. That way if she let him kiss her, she could blame it on the booze. And it wasn’t like she was going to let him back her against a wall, as the one outside was covered in disgusting gum people thought was a fun tourist stop.
“Tell me, then. About the agent.”
She ate some of the dip first, leaning forward with one arm under her boobs to give him an eyeful.
“I signed with him a few weeks ago. He said he waited to make me an offer of representation until he was reasonably sure he had a shot at selling me. He’s excited about me and about Jude. He pitched the project and right now two different publishers are looking at it.”
He grinned, holding his pint glass aloft. “Congratulations, that’s wonderful news.”
She sipped her drink. “It is, thank you.”
“How have you been otherwise?”
She just looked at him, beyond annoyed. “Is that even a real question? How do you think I’ve been?”
There went her cool demeanor, but what the hell?
Alabama Shakes’ “You Ain’t Alone” came on and she looked at him, wondering why she’d even thought she could play this when she loved him so much. God. She loved him.
She grabbed her bag. “This was a mistake.”
He put a hand out, taking hers. “Wait.”
She turned, looking at him. “I shouldn’t have agreed to this.”
“Yes, you should have. We can do this, Wren. I want you in my life. Don’t you want me in yours?”
“Yes, but not like this. Not when I have to weigh everything I’m going to do or say like we’re playing chess.”
“It’ll get easier once we get used to how things were again.”
She narrowed her gaze his way. “Speak from experience, do you?”
The look of confusion and then panic on his face made her feel better. If she was just one of a host it would have sucked.
“No. I didn’t mean it like that. You’re not…we’re not…you know what I mean.”
“As it happens, I don’t. See, one day we’re fine and I sleep over and get up, head off to class and then, two days later, I hear through my cousin that I’m not doing your deliveries anymore. I know what her theories are on the why. But I don’t know a damned thing about your reasons.”
“You mean something to me, Wren. We’re better as friends. My life doesn’t have room for a girlfriend. And you’re not a woman I’d use and toss aside. I don’t want that for you. For us. I don’t want to lose you. We can do this, I know we can.”
She almost felt sorry for him. Until that moment there had been a small amount of doubt at the back of her mind that he truly wanted her. But she heard it in his words and Kelsey was right. He was scared.
Which was really too bad because she meant to be with him and he didn’t stand a chance.
“Well, as it happens, Gregori, I don’t want to get used to the way things were before we got together.” She pulled her hand free and sipped her drink, enjoying the confusion on his face. He had no idea what he was up against.
“I don’t know what you mean. Are you saying we can’t even be friends?”
She drained her glass. “We’re already more than that.” Grabbing her bag, she stood and moved to him, hugging him. He hugged her back and she let herself simply soak that in.
And then she tiptoed up and brushed her lips against his and he responded immediately. He held her tight, his tongue sliding between her lips and that connection shimmered and clicked back into place as he kissed her like he meant it.
It wasn’t a “hey, you’re hot” kiss, it was an “oh god, I’ve missed you so much” kiss. Which was good, because she’d missed him, too. His hands splayed across the small of her back in the way only he seemed to do, she cupped the back of his neck, swallowing his moan.
She pulled back, nipping his bottom lip as she did. Wren knew this wouldn’t be the end of it, he was stubborn that way. But she’d fired the first salvo and he was going down eventually.
When he finally admitted to it, it’d only be sweeter.
“I’ve got to go. I’ll see you later, Gregori. This isn’t over.” She kissed him again quickly and let him watch her walk away. She sure as hell hoped he saw all the looks she got on the way out.
What the hell had just happened? Gregori was glad he’d walked from his place. He hoped the fresh air would help him try to piece together the events of that morning.
He paid for the drinks and food and hustled out to catch up with her but when he got outside he didn’t see her anywhere so he headed home, her taste on his tongue, his fingertips tingling with the phantom touch of her skin.
Had she unbroken up with him? Refused his break up? Said they couldn’t be friends?
And what did he really want it to be?
When he got home he put in a call to his agent and then to Kelsey. Wren was stubborn and he was weak when it came to her. He’d tried not seeing her, but clearly, given the way he’d kissed her just twenty minutes before, his famed spine of steel was nowhere to be found. It wouldn’t be fair to send her mixed messages and, when it came to Wren, he wasn’t sure he had the strength to deny her. Not when he still wanted her so much he hadn’t changed the pillowcase on the pillow she’d slept on the last time she’d been at his loft.
He needed distance. And a lot of it.
Chapter Nine
New York City. Gregori stretched, alone in the rather gargantuan bed dominating his hotel room. The city had some great memories for him. He’d built a lot of his career there.
And a lot of not-so-great memories, mainly those to do with the final death rattle of his marriage. And yet there he was—though thankfully Prentiss was apparently in Italy so he could avoid any chance meeting with her.
He didn’t need this show. He sold just fine without having to go to other cities. But they’d been after him to do one for the last year and, when he accepted, they’d put everything in motion so fast he’d jumped on the opportunity to get out of Seattle and put an entire country between him and Wren.
Kelsey had given him such a lecture! She’d told him what a coward he was being and how he could really risk blowing things with Wren forever and did he really want that?
The panic had been on him from how easy it had been to slide into her arms and that kiss, how natural it had felt to be with her again. All his resolve had crumbled away.
She made him vulnerable. He’d been vulnerable before and it had ended badly. He clearly wasn’t a winner in the relationship game and he needed to stick to what he knew best. Period.
He’d arrived in town two days ago and promptly hit the bars, thinking to fuck her off his mind. But he’d left—alone—after a few hours
. None of the women he’d met were anywhere near Wren and it had felt grossly insulting to her and to himself to be with anyone else.
Time. Yes, time was what he needed. Time away from his loft where memories of her littered the entire space. Memories of the way she tucked up in his bed and worked while he was in his studio. Or of her in his kitchen in nothing more than a tank top and her panties as she raided the pantry for snacks to keep them going through a long night of sex.
He growled, getting out of bed. A shower and then maybe he’d work. May as well put all this angst to some good use.
The cab let her out in front of the swanktastic hotel Kelsey had put Gregori up in. Kelsey, who’d shown up at her apartment the night she’d had drinks with Gregori at the Alibi Room. Just as she and Zoe had cracked open the wine and were sitting down to dinner.
She’d told Wren that Gregori was leaving the next morning to go to New York for a show. A show he’d told Wren not even a month before that he didn’t really care to do.
That kiss had totally put him on the defensive and it was time to deal with the situation once and for all. The games were exhausting and she wanted him. But it couldn’t go on this way. There had to be a “put up or shut up” moment and she needed to deliver it.
So Kelsey gave Wren all her miles, Wren emailed all her teachers and then arranged work coverage, Zoe drove her to the airport and Wren had taken a red-eye.
At the front desk they’d checked her in to the room next to his and given her a key to his room as well because Kelsey had also taken care of that detail and had her name added to the reservation.
She showered and dressed carefully. It was early enough that he probably still wouldn’t be up so she grabbed a cup of coffee and took care of calling and leaving messages for everyone that she’d arrived safely.
Finally, having heard rustling next door, she made her way over. It wasn’t until she had knocked and was putting the keycard in that she wondered if he was alone. If he wasn’t, she supposed things would be well and truly over.
He called out that he didn’t need housekeeping, but it wasn’t a maid who stood in his doorway, it was Wren with a sexy new haircut, a flirty skirt and pretty blouse. She was fresh and lovely and, Christ, just looking at her made things better.
“You cut your hair.”
Her hand went to the new, shorter cut. It worked on her, highlighting her features, exposing her neck. Why was she there?
“I did.” She shut the door after putting out the do not disturb card.
“You’re here.”
“You’re good with the declarative statements this morning. You’re not wearing any clothes.”
He wore a towel wrapped around his waist because he’d just gotten out of the shower.
“I came here to get some distance between us. To cool things off.”
She stepped closer. “I know. I came here to put an end to such silliness.”
“Kelsey is coming soon.”
She laughed, low and sensual and his body responded. The towel did little to hide the affect she had on him.
“She’s not. I’m your assistant this week.”
“Christ. Wren, you need to go. I can do this on my own.”
She pulled out a color coded sheaf of papers. “Oh, really? What is your schedule today?”
He scooped his phone up and opened it to the calendar but Kelsey had removed her notes and appointment entries. All that remained were his, which were more personal notes and to-do lists and had nothing to do with business. He cursed her and reminded himself to fire her when he got back to Seattle. Which he knew he wouldn’t do.
She stepped closer and he held the phone between them like a shield. “Lots of stuff to do? Places to be? Face it, you’re spoiled. She takes care of everything for you and when you don’t have those color coded charts and her calendar you’re lost.” She lifted a shoulder. “I can help you, though. For a price.”
“You’re in league with her to ruin my life.”
She laughed again. “I love your accent. It makes everything sound so nefarious.”
“It is nefarious.”
She took a long look from his toes back up to his face and he had to remind himself to remain stern because she made him want to laugh.
She made him happy.
“Whatever will you do with me to punish my nefarious ways?” She held up the papers. “I’ve got all your appointments right here. I’ll let you have them if you’ll do something for me. One simple thing.”
“I’m absolutely sure I’ll be sorry for taking the bait, but what is it?”
“It’s time to lay it all on the line, Gregori, my love. If you can look me in the eye and tell me without flinching that you don’t love me and you don’t want to be in a relationship with me, I will leave these here, Kelsey will put your calendar to rights and I’ll go. When you get back to Seattle someone else will deliver your packages and, don’t worry, I won’t get fired. Maybe at some point in the future we can be friends again, but for now if I go, I’m going to ask you not to contact me because I do want to be with you. I can’t pretend that away. But I can’t run after you anymore either.”
He couldn’t say it. Even knowing she’d walk away and finally give up. He tried, all while she watched him without saying a word. But her eyes said all she needed saying.
He turned and began to pace. Tried to push away what he really felt as silly. He could not be in love with her.
He shoved a hand through his hair and groaned inwardly. Damn it.
She’d walked through that door and turned his whole day upside down. In a good way. He’d been grumpy and morose and now she stood there looking ridiculously pretty and he was happy. Happy to see her. Happy to hear her voice. Happy she’d given him an ultimatum he couldn’t possibly do anything but give in to.
“You can tell me all the reasons you think this won’t work if you need to get them out. Since you broke up with me via assistant and all.”
He frowned. “I said I was sorry for that.”
“I know. So you’re scared? Of what? That I’ll be like her?”
He rolled his eyes. “God, no. You’re nothing like her. You’re your own person. You have your own life and you’re brilliant.”
She waited and he waved her to sit. He did as well, across from her. “You’re not like me.”
She looked at her lap and back to him. “Nope.”
“You know what I mean.”
She sighed. “You mean I don’t have this fast-paced life? So what? You don’t either, not really. You wear your costume when you have to and that’s not threatening to me. You’re not Gregori the artist who drinks, drugs and fucks his way through town with a sneer on his face.”
He raised a brow. “This is what they say?”
She burst out laughing. “You know they do. So if I’m getting you, you’re what? Worried I’ll slow you down?”
He made a sound and shook his head. “Really? You think so little of me?”
“It seems to me, Gregori, that it’s you who thinks so little of me. That I don’t know the difference between the mask you wear as PR and the real man inside. We click. That’s chemistry and compatibility. It’s not going away tomorrow. I’m not with you for your money or your connections. You don’t have to guard that from me. I have no machinations except to get you out of that towel and into bed. I have my own life and I want you in it. But you’re not all of it. I don’t need a man to live through. I just want one—you—to share it. I’m not always easy. But damn it, I’m worth it. And you’re worth it.”
“I’m very possessive.”
Was he giving in?
“How do you know?”
“I wanted to punch every man who looked at your boobs when you left the Alibi Room the other day. And I want you with me all the time. I’m a lot to manage. Or so I hear.”
“I can handle you. You don’t get to leer at women at your shows from now on. Though I don’t care that you go out with your friends and hang at Fixe.”
“Only if you’re with me.”
“Am I then?”
“With me?”
She nodded.
“As you’ve delivered your saucy little ultimatum, you leave me with no other choice. Which, I suppose, is fine as it’s the choice I prefer anyway.”
She moved quickly, ending up in his lap, straddling his body. “Say ‘saucy little ultimatum’ again.”
“Why?”
God, she loved it when he got gruff and his accent deepened. “Just humor me.”
“Saucy little ultimatum.”
She giggled and kissed over his face. “Your accent makes me tingly.”
“Is that so?” He put some extra Russian in it.
“Mmm. Yes.”
His hands slid up her thighs, pausing when he found the spot where the stockings ended and her skin began. “You’re wearing stockings.”
“Well, I had hoped, of course, that this little talk of ours would turn in a far more sexual direction instead of toward tears. I’m not wearing underpants, either.”
He cupped her ass and pulled her closer. “Neither am I.”
He pulled her sweater up and over her head. “If I recall, the first time I saw you naked you had on a sweater with one of these things beneath. Nearly as soft as your skin.” He peeled the camisole up and then unhooked her bra. All as she watched his hands on her, so relieved he’d come to his senses.
“I wasn’t sure I’d see this again. Your hands on me, that intense concentration on your face.”
“I do not believe that. Never have I met a more stubborn human being than you, kotyonok.” He kissed her chest over her heart and tears stung in her eyes. “I’m sorry I upset you so or gave you reason to doubt me.”
“I’ll let you make it up to me later. I’ve mapped out gelato places here and one in Brooklyn.”
He looked up and stilled at the sight of her unshed tears. Pulling her close, he kissed her temple. “No tears. I promise, I won’t make you cry again. You’re my heart.”
She laughed, snuggling closer. “There’ll be tears, that’s the way of it when you’re close to someone. They know you well enough to hurt in ways no stranger ever could. The key is to never say things you can’t take back.”