***
I flew back to California that very same night and drank tequila until I passed out in my room. I spent the next two days lying in bed in a complete state of depression. I kept sleeping as much as possible because only when I was asleep could I forget about my heartache. I finally dragged my ass out of bed Sunday night and made myself take a long, hot shower. It helped a little, but nothing prepared me for the conversation Hailey and I had.
“Hey, Hails. How was your weekend?”
“It was great, but I missed you.”
“I missed you too. Listen, I need to talk to you about something. I know this is sudden, but I’ve decided to stay out here permanently. I’m really enjoying working with my dad and I think it’s best if I continue to do so.” I close my eyes as I wait for her to reply.
“O, okay,” she stutters. “Whatever you think is best for you Marcus.” I can hear her voice wavering. I can tell she’s trying not to cry.
“I’m going to miss you so much Hails.” I grit my teeth and try to hold my composure at least until I get off the phone.
“I will miss you every day Marcus O’Connor. Don’t forget about your bestie while you’re living the high life.” She jokes to make light of her pain and that’s typical Hailey. Always trying to hold it in and be the strong one.
“Hails, I could never forget about you.” No truer words have ever been spoken by me. She will always be a part of me, no matter where I am. There isn’t a day that goes by that I won’t be wondering what she’s doing and hoping for her happiness.
“Be happy baby girl. He’s out there, go find him.” And with those words I touch the screen, ending our call. I fall on my bed and sob into my pillow, wondering how I’m going to survive without her in my life.
***
Which brings me back to why I’m sitting at this bar and drinking myself numb. It’s been twenty-four hours since I last spoke with Hailey since I last heard her voice. I wonder how she’s doing and hope that she’s dealing with this better than I am. I know in time she will be fine. She has Cory and as much as it pains me to admit this, they were meant to be together. I knock back another shot as I notice someone sit down beside me.
“Hello, Marcus.” I hear my name said in a sultry tone and when I look over I see Josie, the receptionist from work, sitting next to me.
“Hi.” I keep it simple.
“You look like you could use some cheering up.” She leans against my arm, pressing her ample chest against me. I take another glance at her and notice her chocolate brown eyes, full lips, and long brown hair. She looks nothing like Hailey and maybe this is just what I need. I turn on my stool and lean in towards her.
“What d’ya have in mind?”
Chapter Forty-Two
July 2015 - Hailey
Now that Cory and I have officially been together for six days we are free to go on our first date. Work kept us both busy during the week so we didn't have a chance to get together outside of the office. We tried to maintain an air of professionalism at the law firm. Now that it's Saturday and the moment is here, I’m feeling a little anxious about it as I’m getting ready and I’m not sure why. This is Cory...the guy I’ve loved since I was twelve years old. After all this time, I know that I’m able to fully be myself around him. I don’t need to put on any false pretenses or act a certain way. He accepts me for who I am, faults, flaws and all. He told me to dress casually and comfortably and that there would be some walking involved. I have no idea what he has planned but I know no matter what we do, we’ll have a great time. Being around Cory is always fun and now that we don’t have to deny our feelings any longer, we can ease some of this sexual tension between us. I’m not ready to have sex with him, but there are lots of other things we can do to relieve the stress we’ve both been dealing with. I can’t wait to get my hands on his hard body. It’s too much temptation for me to resist. I’ve fought the urge to be near him and forced myself stay away from him for five years and now that I no longer have to, all bets are off and hopefully his clothes will be too.
I’m touching up my lip gloss when I hear him knocking on the door. I smile at my reflection in the mirror and notice that my cheeks are flushed and my eyes are shining brightly. This must be what love looks like. It’s no surprise for me that I’m head over heels for Cory Marshall. I have loved that boy for eleven years now. Even when I hated him, I still loved him. I’m not going to tell him that, though. I’m going to take this relationship one day at a time and try not to place expectations on it. He says he’s all in and this is what he wants, but there’s a part of me that worries it will be too much for him and he may have a change of heart. It’s like when you buy a new car and you spend too much money on it. You tell yourself that you will have so much fun driving around town in it and you think about road trips you’ll take. But every month that large payment is dangerously hanging over your head and you’re too busy working to pay for your car, to even enjoy it. You start to wonder why you made such an extravagant purchase in the first place and wish you wouldn’t have rushed into it. Buyer’s remorse sucks and I don’t want Cory to feel any regret for starting a relationship with me.
I open the door to find him standing there with a bouquet of daisies in his hand and a beaming smile on his face. I take a step back to let him in as he grabs me around the waist, with one of his arms, hugging me so tight, my feet lift off of the floor. I wrap my arms around his neck and lift my face toward his, signaling that I want a kiss from him. He kicks the door shut before lowering his lips till they meet mine. Although it starts out innocent, our kiss soon becomes heated. It’s only a minute till the flowers are on the floor and I’m on my back underneath him on my couch. There’s a lot of dry humping and groaning going on right now. Having him on top of me like this is heaven. It feels amazing to know that there’s no reason why we can’t keep doing this all night if we want to. I’m no longer too young, he’s single, Marcus is gone...yep no reason to stop. It’s all I can do to keep my hands from venturing down to his zipper and having my way with him. I know he’s trying to keep things from moving too fast, but I’ve been waiting for eleven years for him to be mine. It doesn’t get much slower than that.
Cory pulls away and ends our little make out session and now I’m disappointed and turned on.
“We should get going before I stop myself from being a nice guy and just fuck you senseless.” He rubs his hands over his face and exhales loudly.
“If my opinion counts, I’m all for being fucked senseless by you." I sit up, placing both of my feet on the floor, before standing. I run my hands up and down his chest and play with the button on his jeans. He grabs both of my hands, pulling them away from his waistband.
“We should get going and you need to behave.” He scolds me.
“Where are we going? Is what I’m wearing appropriate? I ask him, glancing down at the skinny jeans, black flip flops and a charcoal gray tank top I’m wearing. This outfit is very casual and definitely comfortable. My hair is up in a messy bun on top of my head and I have sterling silver dangly earrings on.
“You look beautiful as usual. You know I love it when you are wearing your kick back clothes. What you chose is perfect because I’m taking you for a picnic in the public gardens and then we’re going to take a ride on a boat that a friend of mine owns. You should grab a sweatshirt so you won’t be cold on the water. I would say I’ll keep you warm, but someone has to drive the boat.”
Cory drives us to the public gardens in his Range Rover and we find a parking space as close as possible. He opens my door for me and closes it behind me, reminding me of how impeccable his manners have always been. He grabs a picnic basket and a blanket from the back hatch, holding them in one hand and taking mine in his other. It’s only a short walk before we enter the gardens and as we continue on, I take in the expanse of the beautiful scene before me. The well-manicured grass is thick and dark green. It’s trimmed close to the ground, appearing healthy and lush, reminding me of a giant s
hag rug. We walk along for a bit and I’m enjoying the sensation of my hand being held in his. It seems surreal that we no longer have to hide our feelings and we can openly show our affection for each other. Holding his hand in public is even better than I could have imagined. How can something so small, something that I’ve taken for granted hundreds of times in my life, have such a monumental feeling to it now?
We find an area that is away from the beaten path and offers us a sense of privacy. Cory spreads the blanket out on the grass, neatly and precisely, before setting the picnic basket down. I kick off my flip flops at the edge, where the grass and blanket meet, before taking a seat with my legs stretched out before me. He sits down next to me and flashes me a quick smile before he begins digging around in the basket. The light blue blanket is soft under my heels as I slide my legs up into a criss-crossed position.
“What kind of sandwich would you like? I made turkey and cheese roll ups with honey mustard dressing or turkey and cheese roll ups with honey mustard dressing?” He cocks his eyebrow and tilts his head as if he’s asked me a valid question and is waiting for my answer. I try not to giggle as I act like I’m thinking, tapping my lip with my index finger, before replying deadpan.
“I’ll take the turkey and cheese roll up, please.” As he hands it to me, I can’t help the giggle that escapes. He made me my favorite sandwich and it makes me happy knowing that he wants to please me. The fact that he has paid enough attention to know what my favorite sandwich is makes me giddy. It’s the little things, the small details that don’t go unnoticed, that sometimes mean the most to me. I don’t need extravagant things or grand gestures. I need to know that I mean something to him and so far he’s doing a great job of showing me that.
He hands me a bottle of lemon flavored ice tea, another one of my favorites and a small bag of potato chips. I smile over at him as he hands me a napkin and a paper plate.
“Wow, you’ve thought of everything. You have all my favorites here.” I take a bite of my roll up and moan as the honey mustard taste bursts on my tongue. “The honey mustard is a nice touch, by the way.”
“I know you always use it, but only on your turkey sandwiches. Otherwise, you prefer mayonnaise.” I smile at him and watch as his full lips move into an answering grin.
“So what else do you know about me?” I inquire, as I continue eating, crunching away on a chip.
“I know that green and blue are your favorite colors, that the Foo Fighters are your favorite band and that your kindle is loaded with more books than you’ll ever read.” I nod my head in answer. “I know that you smell like warm vanilla frosting and that your lips taste even better.” He leans closer toward me and I suddenly feel flushed. “I know that you have the biggest heart, that you’re fiercely loyal to those you care about and that we were meant to be together.” He pauses, tipping my chin up so he can gaze into my eyes. I drop my sandwich on my plate, all thoughts of food, fleeing from my head.
“I mean that, Hailey. I know this is where we are meant to be, everything in the past, led us to this point and I’m not going to do anything to risk losing you. You’re finally my girl now and I’m going to do everything I can to show you how much you mean to me.” His expression is so earnest I can’t help but crawl into his lap to kiss him... repeatedly. He is sweetness personified and I know that most people don’t get to see this side of him. He keeps all of that buried beneath a cocky outer shell. In the past, he’s given me glimpses of how kind and caring he can be but I have a feeling I’m going to be seeing a lot more of it now.
As our lips part, I feel as though I need to say something to him, to let him know that I’m taking our relationship seriously, even though I’m hesitant to think too far ahead. Instead, I prefer staying in the present and enjoy each and every moment we share. I'm sure in time, as I gain more confidence about our relationship lasting, I’ll look forward to what the future has in store for us.
“You forgot something,” I tell him as I remain straddling his lap. “You failed to mention how crazy I am about you. That you’ve owned a piece of my heart since I was twelve-years-old and…” I pause for a moment, trying to compose myself. I’m feeling a little emotional over what I’m about to say to him. “My favorite place to be in this world is in your arms.” I smile tremulously at him, my eyes shining with unshed tears. He cups my face in his palms, kissing me sweetly and lovingly, before resting his forehead on mine.
“How did I get so lucky?” He whispers.
After we had finished eating our dinner, we decided we would skip the boat ride and instead go back to Cory’s place. He mentioned that we can borrow his friend’s boat another time and I’m looking forward to eating our dessert and watching some television with him. I just want to spend time together doing normal things. Things that we’ve never had a chance to experience before...things that most couples take for granted.
We’re cuddled up on the couch watching Suits, which is one of my favorite shows. I just learned it’s also one of his. He’s feeding me bites of chocolate chip cookies that he made just for me. They are soft and chewy and so much better than mine ever come out when I make them. Who knew that Cory Marshall was the kind of guy to bake his girlfriend cookies? My boyfriend baked for me. How sweet is that?
***
Cory gave me the option of going home to my apartment or staying over here, at his place. Of course, I chose the latter. There was no choice to make. I want to sleep in his arms and start my day the same way. He gave me a t-shirt of his to sleep in and it smells divine... like him. It covers me almost to my knees thanks to his ample height and my lack of. I’m swimming in this thing, but I love the idea of wearing something of his to bed.
He cuddles up behind me in bed, wrapping his arm around my waist. He kisses the top of my head and I smile to myself as I feel him smell my hair.
“Good night babe. I’m not going to touch you or kiss you tonight. We’re just going to sleep in each other’s arms. I’m going to wait to make you mine Hailey and when I do, we won’t ever be the same. We’ll be forever changed and there will be no going back to us just being friends. It’s all or nothing from here on out.”
Chapter Forty - Three
July 12, 2015 - Cory
I will never forget the morning of July 5, 2015, no matter how long I live. I woke up from a night of dreamless sleep to find Hailey nestled perfectly in my arms and in that moment I knew that I never wanted to be without her again. She made me the happiest man alive when she looked at me with her beautiful eyes reflecting her love for me and told me that she wanted to be with me. My heart pounded so hard in my chest that for a moment, I felt a little dizzy with shock. It was hard to wrap my brain around the fact that after so many years, my dream was actually coming true. Hailey was finally mine and we’re going to share our lives together. I’m going to make her the happiest she’s ever been.
***
It’s been a week since Hailey and I truly began our relationship. I consider our "start" to be the day after she spoke with Marcus. As it turns out, she didn’t have to let him down easy. She didn’t have to let him down at all because Marcus told her he wants to stay in California. What Hailey doesn’t know and never will is that Marcus also called me that Sunday night after he had already spoken to her. He told me that he saw us together and that he could see how much love there was between us. He said he was removing himself from the situation by staying in California and that I better do my best to make her happy because he’s not promising to stay there forever. I know that someday soon he may return and if I’m not enough for Hailey he will do his best to win her back. He swore me to secrecy and out of respect for how Marcus has given me this chance with her, I’m going to honor it. But he’s never going to have another opportunity to be with Hailey. He can come back to Massachusetts and give it his best shot, but I’m not going anywhere unless it’s with her. She and I were destined to be together and I love her more than I ever thought was possible.
This past week with
her has been better than I imagined it would be. Last night was our first real date...the kind of date where you plan ahead and go pick your girl up. We had such a great time and I hope she’s starting to realize the depth of my feelings for her. I'm not quite ready to tell her how much I love her and if I did she wouldn't believe me. She doesn't understand that part of me has been in love with her since the first time our lips touched. Now that we’re together I'm going to do whatever it takes to make her happy. I'm going to shower her with my love so she will never have a reason to doubt me again. When I do say those three magical words to her, she will know that I mean them with every single fiber of my being.
Chapter Forty-Four
September - Hailey
It’s the beginning of September and Cory has rented a beach house in Corolla, North Carolina for us to spend the week at. The bright yellow bungalow has blue shutters and a wraparound deck. The small size of the cottage is perfect for just the two of us and the immediate area surrounding it, reminds me of the dunes near our beach back in Massachusetts. This location is a lot more private, though, with no neighbors in sight. It feels nice to be so isolated from everyone and not have family and friends all around us. We’re in our own little bubble down here and I know I will always cherish the memories we make.
Waiting for Us Page 24