by E. M. Peters
What had the world come to? The question resonated in her mind so loudly that it pained her.
Suddenly, Jia only felt like one very small, very powerless person. The feeling of helplessness dealt a blow more painful than anything she had endured up to that point. In that moment, she felt defeated. Her free will had been stolen. It had been stolen for a long time, she realized – stolen from everyone except a select few. What had the world come to? The question was becoming too heavy, too unwieldy. They had finally broken her, and she finally realized that she had absolutely nothing to lose anymore.
“I’ll go,” she said, tears filling her eyes and her hands shaking. “I’ll go to Colony Alpha.”
ɸ ɸ ɸ
Jia looked down to see what she had made with the paper at the community table on Colony One. When she did, she found she had ripped the paper into tiny pieces. She looked up and around. Several of her fellow passengers were staring openly at her – looks ranging from concerned to guarded.
These people had no idea what was in store for them, she thought. I don’t even know what is in store for us – not with any certainty.
She searched the faces of nearby passengers and, not for the first time, wondered which of them were World Corp plants assigned to monitor her, ready to strike out at the first hint of her disobedience.
She reminded herself to take deep, calming breaths. Because the alternative was so much worse, she often seriously entertained the idea that she might be crazy. That she had made up the whole experience in her head – that she was never a research scientist or tortured for information.
Perhaps she had made it all up to cope with her decision to change her life so radically.
Perhaps she had a long history of mental illness.
Perhaps we really are headed to paradise, she considered. Is that so out of the realm of possibilities?
07
Hyperion, Mission Day 10
The crew of the Hyperion settled in for a meal in the small mess area of their ship, with the exception of the Captain, who didn’t take meals with the crew if she could avoid it. The craft was commissioned to hold a crew of up to ten, but the galley was the only informal space large enough to fit them all comfortably.
“What’s for chow this time, Doc?” Charlie asked. Winston had become the de facto ‘chef’ of the group, having little to do on the voyage since everyone had remained healthy. Even Finn, who had had a brief bout of space sickness, had a healthy color back in her cheeks.
The doctor evaluated the supplies and decided, “Looks like green pea soup and flatbread.”
“Anything will be better than the meatloaf you tricked us into eating,” Niko commented with a shiver, eliciting an eye roll from the good doctor.
Makenna had some device disassembled on the table. At first, the others had complained when she did this at mealtime – which was often – but they had since relented. There was no talking to Mak when she was engaged in a project. At the mention of the meatloaf, however, she proved to everyone that she wasn’t completely oblivious, “Never again with the meatloaf.” She said and blanched slightly as she worked. “I lose two hours of productivity because of meatloaf.”
“Aw, I didn’t think it was that bad,” Charlie put in, trying to assuage the doctor’s hurt feelings. In reality, he had spent just as much time in the bathroom as everyone else after the meal.
“That’s because you were raised in a barn,” Charlie looked up and over to see – much to his surprise – Captain Avery standing in the doorway, leaning on the frame with her arms crossed. She had a distinct amused look on her face and before Charlie could respond, she spoke again – “It’s tea time again, I see.”
“Just because I am British,” Winston huffed, and then sighed tellingly as he gestured. “Tea is on the hotplate.” He admitted and went back to preparing the soup.
The Captain helped herself to a cup, and then joined the table. Charlie, Niko, and Finn all stared at her with blank expressions. Even Makenna spared a surprised double take before refocusing on what she was doing.
“What?” Avery asked.
“Are you joining us for dinner, Captain?” Finn asked.
“A girl’s got to eat,” Avery admitted, taking a sip of the tea and blanching. She was more of a coffee person, made evident when she abandoned the cup. She leaned back in her chair and stretched to grab an apple from a see-through compartment drawer. A stack of pull-out drawers were what made up the dry storage pantry on the ship. She bit into it and noticed everyone was still staring, “Well don’t go out of your way to make me feel welcome.” She commented. “Just… carry on with whatever it is you all do.” She insisted, but watched them with an unusual keen interest and a half smile.
Niko pursed his lips, pushed down the unsettled feeling at the Captain’s attentions and turned to Finn, who had been paging through a physical album of photos, “Are these all your work?” He asked her.
Finn nodded, “Yer welcome to have a look.” She slid the album over to give him a better view.
He ran his fingertips over the plastic pages that protected the photographs, “It’s so odd to see a non-digital photograph,” he admitted. He studied the first image – the one she had been viewing. It was a colorless picture of a woman and her three children working in a production zone. The smallest one looked to be three years old. “My goodness,” he found himself breathing the words aloud.
The image was striking in a way he could not express. There was a look of true burden on the woman’s face – not because of her kids. On the contrary, she seemed to be burdened with the guilt of the life she was providing for them. The children all wore weathered looks far beyond their physical ages. Childhood would mean something entirely different for these children than it did for him. Niko wasn’t sure how he had come to that conclusion from the photo alone – perhaps he had just made up a story based on pity. Either way, the impact on him was real. Knowing that poverty existed was one thing – being faced with it front and center was another. He found himself looking up from the photos to Finn, who had dedicated her life to trying to bring the injustices of the world front and center. He suddenly understood why her energy felt so different than anyone else he had ever met.
He turned the page to find similar pictures of men and women with their families, all working no matter what age. It seemed to be a series she did. It progressed into a different story, photos of gatherings came next, then portraits of people as they stood in crowds listening, or standing in front of crowds speaking.
Niko came to a photograph that evoked an instant memory. It was a close up shot of a young man with his filter pulled away from his mouth and nose. His mouth was open, frozen in mid shout. On instinct, Niko turned to the next page to find the same subject hunched over in mid cough, a stark contrast from the image of defiance on the previous page.
“I saw this on the viewer.” Niko pointed to the young man. “I saw this protest on the news. I heard what he said. You were there?” He sounded surprised, but he shouldn’t have been considering what he already knew about Finn.
She nodded and her tone was solemn when she confirmed, “That gathering was not dispersed peacefully and that young man did not make it out alive.”
“That’s too bad,” Avery commented dismissively, tossing her apple core into a nearby waste bin. Her voice forced Niko and Finn to look up, “But it does remind me. I was just looking up coverage of the launch of Colony One.” She pulled out her handheld glass device and set it on the table. She tapped the interface a few times and a projection hologram of the footage sprung from the glass device, hovering over it like a cast of ghosts.
Makenna looked up from her project and the Doctor stopped what he was doing to watch the image. They had all seen the speeches and the footage of the ship taking off, but what was playing on Avery’s handheld was different.
“Lieutenant Dilyn, can you share with us your thoughts on this historic voyage?” A reporter asked one of the passengers who was about t
o board Colony One. She avoided the question, looking nervous, anxious or both.
“Me too!” Another passenger put in. When the group saw him, they all immediately looked at Niko, then back to the projection. “I’m here to make all my family and friends proud. What we’re doing is important and necessary to humankind.” The man on the projection said and Avery paused the image so that he was frozen temporarily in time.
There was stunned silence for a long moment, until – “That’s you!” Charlie exclaimed, pointed at the image and fixed Niko with a meaningful look. The projection ghost-like figure had exactly the same features as Niko – the dark curly ringlets for hair, right down to the bump on the length of his nose. Most striking were the eyes and the voice, which were identical. The man in the image – Luca – had jovial eyes. Not something anyone had seen on Niko, but they were remarkably similar in color, depth, and intensity.
Niko smiled and laughed, “Everyone has a doppelganger.” He said dismissively.
Finn was shaking her head, looking from the projection to Niko and back. “Normally I would agree, but…” she trailed off, feeling that he was uncomfortable. It was clear Avery had an agenda and Finn wasn’t sure she wanted to help.
“I just happened to have access to Colony One’s manifest,” Avery said as she sat back in her chair and fixed Niko with a meaningful look. “His is listed as last name ‘Andris.’”
The images Avery had played made a crushing anxiety build in Niko. Even with her expectant eyes on him, he felt himself losing the fight to stay in the present as the memories came flooding back.
ɸ ɸ ɸ
Since his work was in the astronomy field, Niko had been the first of the two brothers to hear of the Colony One mission. Luca, while being an intelligent person, did not have the penchant for the sciences like his brother. He liked people, which oftentimes did not pay the bills. Despite his disinterest of academic fields, Luca was incredibly jealous when he heard that Niko had been offered a spot on Colony One, but was still able to remain supportive of his brother. He even encouraged Niko to go. It would be the single-most amazing thing anyone in their family would have done, he would always say.
Niko did not reject the idea of the amazing opportunity outright, though his natural skepticism made him reluctant – a fact he had not shared with his family. He put in his tentative agreement to be a part of the mission, but was careful to research every aspect.
It was the month before launch when everything began to unravel. Niko had not been able to find any substantial record of Colony Alpha – anything that even came close to it was classified information that he did not have clearance to view. He called friends, colleagues, past associates – no one could, or would, give him the information he was looking for. Niko was not a natural risk taker, so at the first sign of doubt, he backed out.
Luca was busily making a sandwich in the community kitchen of the public housing complex he lived in when Niko dropped by for an unexpected visit. It was late and they stood alone as Niko broke the news.
“What do you mean you’re not going?” Luca exclaimed, abandoning the knife he was using to cut the sandwich in half. “You have to go!”
“My place was always optional,” Niko explained. “I have not been able to substantiate the probability of success for literally any part of the mission.” He crossed his arms and leaned against a row of lower cabinets, careful to touch nothing. He didn’t enjoy making the trip to the inner city to see his brother – he preferred the illusion that his brother was not, in fact, a broke letch on society. He had offered so many times to move him into his apartment until he could get onto his feet – but Luca always refused on principle. He didn’t want to be a burden, or in truth, admit that he couldn’t make it without the support of his family. After a pause and a confused expression from his brother, Niko tried to explain it another way, “I have an unsettled feeling about it.”
Luca shook his head with resolve and Niko wondered for a moment why he was taking it so hard. “This is so typical of you. Never willing to take a chance on something that you can’t fully predict.”
“It would be foolish to do this now,” Niko insisted. “Why are you so upset?” he finally asked.
“Because…!” Luca struggled with finding the words. He threw up his hands in frustration, “Because I wanted to be on the next ship out. I wanted to be there with you, making history. They’re saying the transport is full and they’re not taking anyone else. You’re giving up on a chance of a lifetime!”
“Luca, listen to me. It’s simple – we’ll wait. If the colony is successful, we can both sign up for the next trip out.”
“That’s not good enough.” Luca insisted. He crossed his arms and his eyebrows knit together as he stared at the floor. After a tense moment, his forehead relaxed and his eyes lit up, “I’ll take your place.” He said with excitement.
“Brother. Absolutely not.” Niko was shocked that Luca even considered it an option. “Don’t you hear what I’m saying? I have not been able to corroborate key factors regarding trajectory, sustainability or planetary categorization.” He paused, and after seeing another flash of incomprehension, continued. “In other words, I have serious doubts about the planning and execution of this mission. I’m an astronomer – I know what I’m talking about.”
“You have always been too cautious. They would not send an entire colony ship into space if they weren’t sure.” Luca reasoned. “And it’s about time we did something to try and save Earth from ourselves!”
Niko sighed – Luca had always been a bleeding heart, always taking the news reports of impending catastrophe too seriously. It was one of the reasons he claimed to avoid investing in things like property and career – unsure of the ultimate worth of it. He supposed Luca thought this might be a chance to finally commit to something. Even still – he couldn’t let Luca ruin his life even further. “I will not allow you to take my place,” he proclaimed sternly, dropping his arms to his sides and taking a step towards his brother with a serious look. “You have a son, for crying out loud,” he reminded.
Luca visibly bristled. “Lauren won’t even let me see him. I can’t stand being here anymore where everyone thinks I’m a screw up.” His jaw tensed and he looked up with glossy eyes. When he finally returned his gaze to Niko, his expression was earnest, “Don’t you understand? I could change everyone’s mind with this one thing.”
Niko put a hand flat to his own chest. Luca’s look cut right through him and with his words, Niko felt an incredible weight settle on him. He had been guilty many times over of thinking lesser of Luca. “I feel your pain, brother.” In a way, it was true. The bond of twins was still a mystery, but Niko knew from firsthand experience, it was very real. His expression softened, “But it is still impossible. They will be reading bio-stamps before they let anyone board. They will know you’re not me.”
“I can take care of that,” Luca countered aloud. Internally, he was already recalling that he had made an acquaintance who claimed to be able to tamper successfully with bio-stamps. He thought that since he and Niko shared many similar biological markers, it would be even easier. It was quite the gamble to try – punishment for altering a bio-stamp was a lengthy stay in prison, indentured servitude in a production zone, or both depending on how successful the effort had been. Seemingly, it was worth it in Luca’s mind. By time they figured it out, he would be long gone.
“Please,” Niko pleaded. “Do not pursue this. Think of Andy – your son will eventually need his father. Think of me. I will always need my brother.”
Luca returned Niko’s look for several seconds, trying to keep his resolve. Eventually, he visibly broke down, his shoulders slumping in a kind of defeat. “Alright,” he relented. “It was a foolish idea, like you said.”
“I appreciate what you’re trying to accomplish,” Niko tried to lessen the sting of the burn he knew Luca was feeling. “I really do. Please trust me – I’ll always have your back.”
His brothe
r nodded, but on the inside, he was still chomping at the bit. Luca appreciated Niko’s love and support – something he got more of from his brother than he did their parents – but it was time for him to make his own tough decisions.
They parted ways – Niko thinking he had brought Luca to his side of logic and Luca already pulling up his bio-stamp contact’s number as Niko was headed for the nearest rail station.
The next time Niko saw his brother was on the viewer, the day that Colony One took off, never to return. He remembered the pain of that moment all too well. In the moment it took him to recognize his brother, Niko felt like his entire world was being ripped from him. He had dedicated his life to work – no wife, no children. All he had was Luca and a tentative relationship with his parents.
Panic hit him strong as he watched the images. Dozens of questions occurred all at once – was the news feed delayed? Had Colony One taken off already? Would his brother be caught? Would the launch be successful? Would he ever see his twin again?
There was a split second where Niko thought he might black out from the shock.
And it all happened in just a moment. Immediately after the shock hit, he was on his handheld trying to ring Luca. He left a dozen tear filled messages, pleading with him to abandon the mission. He cursed every moment of the launch footage, hoping and wishing for a delay.
In the end, Niko watched the launch of Colony One through the hot burn of tears.
ɸ ɸ ɸ
Returning to the present, Niko found Avery’s expectant gaze was turning impatient, “Isn’t this something we should be talking about in private?” His tone was unhappy.
“No,” Avery answered without hesitation.
Niko swallowed hard and narrowed his eyes at her before looking away. “I would have preferred to not divulge this, but yes… he is my brother. My twin.” He finally admitted.