‘No, Allegra, you must eat before you leave. I believe there are other guests here, it would
be rude to leave so abruptly, would it not?’ Jago said softly.
She smiled, finding she had no energy to argue. ‘I had forgotten about Emily and Edward Grierson being here. Mr Grierson, are you and Lady Arabella joining us?’
‘I shall endeavour to locate my wife. If you go to the small drawing-room we shall be there presently.’
*
Allegra attempted to follow him from the room but he refused to release her. ‘My love, we need to talk before you go. Will you walk in the garden with me?’
He guided her to the French window and expertly released the two catches. The terrace was pleasantly warm, but thankfully shaded from the heat of the sun. They strolled in companionable silence, a new experience for both of them. He was the first to speak.
‘Allegra, I’ll be blunt, you know I cannot tolerate deceit or prevarication. Have you had a change of heart? Am I wrong in thinking you no longer find this union of ours repugnant?’
She could not face him, finding his penetrating gaze unnerving. ‘Yes, you are correct. I am now reconciled to our match.’ Her heart raced uncomfortably but he did not react as she expected.
‘I’m relieved to hear that, my dear. I understand how hard this has been for you. But I promise I’ll not make any demands on you after we are married, if that’s what you wish.’
She did not answer. He mistook her silence for lack of comprehension. She heard him clear his throat before continuing.
‘What I mean, is we can remain married in name only. I’ll not come to your bed unless you ask me to.’
This this was plain speaking indeed! He wanted a response. Hastily she nodded, indicating she understood, but remained mute. For the moment she had not the words to tell him she was eagerly anticipating sharing her bed, and body, with him.
She was not a cold woman like her mother had been, one who wished to shun all physical intimacy. The reason she had never been able to respond to her many admirers was because her feelings had not been engaged. The instant she had recognized her love for Jago she had thawed, from the inside out. She had finally solved a conundrum she had never understood.
She was a woman who reacted only to a man she had feelings for. All her reticence, her strict upbringing, made it impossible for her to tell him what was in her heart. She prayed that when the time came her actions would show she wished to be a real wife, to experience everything he had to offer. Her lips bowed and she felt a second surge of heat as she imagined just how much her future husband might have to share. This gave her the courage she needed to speak.
She knew he was waiting, assessing every nuance of her behaviour. Slowly she faced him, eyes wide, her mouth smiling. ‘Jago, I am innocent but not ignorant. I know what will be expected of me when we are wed and I am content with that.’ His eyes darkened and his neck, revealed by his lack of a neck-cloth, convulsed. ‘I have behaved badly, and for that I beg your pardon. You have done nothing to deserve my enmity. It is I who have behaved like a person of no breeding.’
He reacted as if she had slapped him. His face hardened and he viewed her with a look of icy contempt. ‘I see I have been deluding myself. You will never change. In your eyes I shall always be your inferior, you will always despise me.’ He loomed over her and she could not prevent herself recoiling. ‘I’m glad you understand what you’re duties will be, my lady. These duties are the only reason I wish to marry you. If I could offer you a carte-blanche, then believe me I would do so.’
‘You are despicable. How could I have considered otherwise?’ Her heart in pieces, but her back straight, she fled, hurriedly retracing her steps to the small drawing-room. Outside she paused, her breathing ragged, trying to regain control before entering.
The sound of feet pushed her into action and she almost fell into the room in her anxiety not to renew the conversation with a man who was buying her favours - who thought of her as no more than Haymarket ware. He was prepared to put a ring on her finger first, but the intention was still the same.
Edward Grierson, now grown into his looks, jumped to her aid. ‘Lady Allegra, what’s wrong? I hope the news is not worse than expected?’
‘No, thank you, Mr Edward, Richard has lost the sight of his right eye, which is tragic, but no more than I anticipated. I am afraid I clumsily tripped on my hem.’ She paused, was Jago going to follow her in? His heavy footsteps receded and she released her breath.
Allegra accepted Edward’s arm and walked over to greet Emily. She noticed the abundance of food laid out on the side tables. Miss Grierson, I see our luncheon is here. Shall we make a start? Mr Tremayne will not be joining us and I believe Miss Tremayne and Miss Murrell have had trays sent up to them.’
Emily rose gracefully from the padded settle, the ribbons and bows that decorated her primrose-yellow walking dress swirling round her matching slippers.
‘Good heavens, Miss Grierson! Were you intending to tramp around the fair in those? You would ruin them in five minutes,’ Allegra could not prevent herself exclaiming.
‘I have half-boots here; I sent them to the boot-room. But they do not look well with my gown.I intended to change before we ventured out. I suppose we will not be visiting the fair now.’
She embraced Allegra fondly, as though they were bosom bows and had been parted for weeks and not less than an hour. ‘Do you admire my new bonnet? I adore it but I am finding the plethora of fruit is making me quite dizzy. For every time I move my head it jounces and bounces in front of my eyes.’
Allegra was forced to smile. ‘Then I should remove it, my dear. I intend to remove mine. We are friends, and as your father, Lord Grierson, is frequently heard to say, we do not stand on ceremony here.’
‘I shall do so. Pray excuse me whilst I run upstairs to find someone to assist me.’ She watched in horror as Allegra prepared to untie the silk ribbon that secured her bonnet. ‘Surely you don’t intend to do so in here, in a drawing-room?’
‘Indeed I do. But please do not let my doing so prevent you from seeking assistance. Perhaps you can discover your brother and Lady Arabella and bring them back with you.’
She had heard the younger girl had recently become engaged to a thrusting young major. He was temporarily stationed at the barracks in Colchester whilst he trained up a troop of reserves to transport back to the Peninsula.
‘I had forgotten how pretty your sister is,’ she paused before continuing, ‘but rather young for her years.’
Edward, who had watched his sister dash out shrugged his shoulders philosophically. ‘She is a sweet girl, the best sister any fellow could have, but I’m forced to admit she’s not exactly a blue-stocking.’
Allegra nodded. ‘And you, Mr Edward, you have changed so much in the three years since I last saw you. I do believe you are now considerably taller than me.’
Edward sauntered over to stand beside her. He topped her by half a head. ‘I’ve grown and filled out. I am taller than Charles now.’ He picked up a plate. ‘Allow me to serve you some of this delicious cold collation. Heaven knows how long Em will be.’
She viewed the plates of elegantly arranged cold cuts, salmon in aspic, meat pasties, pickles, chutney and cheese. ‘I wish I had the appetite to do this justice. I will have a small portion of the salmon, some salad leaves and a sweet roll, thank you, sir.’ Allegra left him at the buffet and sat at the octagonal marquetry table that had been laid ready for them.
Edward handed her a half filled plate. ‘Are you certain that’s enough? There’s food here to feed an army.’
‘Then you had better consume three plates yourself, Edward, or their cook might be offended.’
It did not take long for Allegra to eat her fill. She wiped her lips and drank a little from a glass of freshly made lemonade. Edward pushed back his chair and returned to the table to pile his plate for a second time.
‘There are dainties here, and pineapple slices, shall
I fetch you some?’
‘No, thank you, I have had sufficient. But please carry on - I love to see a man with a healthy appetite.’ Chuckling he returned to the table. ‘Tell me, Mr Edward, what are you planning to do with the rest of your life? You must be eighteen now, time enough to have made a decision.’
‘Did you not hear? I have my colours. Theo, the Earl of Wister, Marianne’s husband, purchased them for me, for my name-day gift.’
‘A soldier? How exciting! Which regiment do you join?’
‘I am to go with Major Denning, Emily’s betrothed. I begin my training in Colchester on Monday.’ The door opened and their hosts, plus Emily, came in. Edward scrambled to his feet. ‘We have started. I hope you don’t mind?’
‘Not at all, as long as there’s plenty left for us,’ Charles replied. He surveyed the plates withsatisfaction. ‘I’ve not eaten today and I’m famished.’
The two girls did not wait to be served by either gentleman but piled their own plates, chattering non-stop, completely ignoring Allegra, and choosing to sit at the second table on the far side of the room.
Charles, smiling fondly at his wife of scarcely two months, came to sit with Allegra and Edward. ‘I apologize for both my wife and sister, Lady Allegra. They are desperate to spend as much time as possible together. When Emily marries next month she’s travelling with the Major. The girls have never been separated since they were in leading strings. It will be hard for Arabella to lose her closest friend.’ His eyes were weary and he appeared far older than his age of three and twenty.
Allegra hated to see him so low. Impulsively she patted the clenched fist resting next to his plate. ‘I am to be married in August and shall continue to live at the Priory. I would be delighted to become a closer friend to Lady Arabella if she wishes it.’
‘Thank you, Lady Allegra. It’s a kind thought, but I rather think Arabella and would be happier spending time with Miss Demelza. They are closer in age and temperament.’ He grinned at her. ‘Don’t poker up, you know what I mean. I love my Bella, I would gladly die for her, but I’m not blind to her faults. I promise you, she would drive you to distraction in a very short space of time.’
Allegra relaxed again and returned his smile, but inside she was hurt. Was she so austere, so judgemental, Charles did not consider her as a suitable companion for his young wife?
‘Richard and Demelza are supposed to marry in August also but I expect, in the circumstances, the ceremony might well be postponed. He will not wish to stand up at the altar until he is fully recovered.’
Edward dropped his cutlery loudly on his empty plate. ‘That was an excellent repast. If you want to know what I think, it’s that Miss Tremayne is far too young to be getting married. She’s scarcely out of the schoolroom. It would be better for her to have a season before settling down to matrimony.’
‘You are quite right. But their affections are engaged and they are determined to wed at the same time Tremayne and I exchange our vows.’
Edward stood up. ‘That’s the same as Em. There was no persuading her to wait either.’ He half-bowed. ‘Please excuse me, I’ve promised to meet up with some cronies. They’ll be waiting for me at the Plough.’ Without bidding the young ladies goodbye, he left the room, closing the door behind him.
Charles frowned. ‘I apologize for my brother. He’s not usually so uncivil.’
Allegra shrugged. ‘It is no matter. This has been a morning fraught with difficulties. Which reminds me Mr Grierson, as we are being outspoken, I wish to know why Richard was obliged to climb that tree? Why was a gardener’s boy not sent instead?’
‘There was no one else. When I decided to give all the staff the day off I had no idea that stupid animal was going to become stuck in a tree. By the time I required someone they’d all departed. As far as I was concerned it could have stayed up there. But Bella was weeping and crying and would not come in to dress. So when Witherton and Miss Demelza arrived and he offered to fetch it down, I could see no reason to refuse.’
The haunted expression had returned and Allegra wished she had not asked. ‘Of course that is how it was. I should not have mentioned it. Richard has climbed so many trees without mishap, why should anyone have expected it to be have been different today?’
She stood up. ‘Sir, could you find someone to fetch Miss Tremayne and Miss Murrell down? Also, will you ask the stables to send round our carriage? I have no wish to attend the fair today and shall return to the Priory as soon as I have seen how Richard is.’
He bowed. ‘Bella, my dear, Lady Allegra is leaving and you have not exchanged more than a few words with her.’
His wife jumped up and curtsied. ‘I beg your pardon, Lady Allegra, but Emily is to leave here soon and we still have so much to talk about.’
This was hardly an appropriate explanation and poor Charles knew it. He frowned at his wife and her sunny smile slipped. Allegra spoke before the young couple had words.
‘My dear, Lady Arabella, it is of no matter. I must leave now. Thank you so much for your hospitality.’ Demelza and Miss Murrell arrived in the entrance hall as the barouche drew up outside.
The carriage rattled homewards, is occupants quiet, lost in their own thoughts. Allegra kept reliving the conversation with Jago which condemned her to a loveless marriage. It would seem she had found her love for him but lost, irretrievably, any hope of him reciprocating her feelings.
Why her chance remark should have so mortally offended him she was at a loss to understand. She had said far worse before and he had shrugged it off. Why, this time, had he reacted so violently? She was glad she understood his feelings ; far better than discover it too late.
She dipped her head, hiding her wet eyes under the brim of her bonnet. She had been told often enough, by her nanny, her governess and her mother, that a lady in her position must never show any emotion. That at all times one must remain composed and in control.
For some reason, today she could not keep her shell intact. If this was what being in love meant, she wanted none of it. She hated feeling overwrought and emotional. She clenched her hands and came to a decision. She would eradicate her love for Jago Tremayne from her heart. He did not deserve it so she would destroy it, starting that very second.
However her eyes continued to fill and when Miss Murrell pressed a large cotton square into her hand she took it gratefully.
Chapter Twelve
Demelza, sitting diagonally to Allegra, was unaware her future mama was in distress and blithely addressed her. Richard’s accident had not, it seemed, had a similar effect on her composure.
‘Lady Allegra, why did Richard not let us in to see him?’
Quickly Miss Murrell answered. ‘My dear, he would not wish to upset you. When he returns tomorrow he will be glad of your company. He has never been one to enjoy being an invalid.’
This appeared to satisfy Demelza and the barouche lapsed once more into quiet. Allegra sensed that they were travelling on Witherton land and her spirits revived a little. Surreptitiously she dried her face and pushed the handkerchief into her reticule.
‘Miss Murrell, the staff will not know about the accident. Could I ask you to inform them?’
‘I’ll do so gladly, my dear. Lord Witherton and Mr Tremayne will require some necessities. Do you wish me to organize their valets to convey them to Great Bentley Hall?’
‘Yes, if you would.’ Allegra’s voice was listless and even Demelza noticed something was amiss.
‘Lady Allegra, are you unwell? Do you have the headache?’
Again Miss Murrell stepped in. ‘She does, Miss Demelza, so it is best we do not disturb her with idle chatter.’
‘I have megrims sometimes. I have to stay in bed and—’
‘Yes, yes, my dear, but hush now. We’re almost home. You run along to your rooms, I have duties to perform but will be with you shortly.’
On hearing that hated word Allegra’s tears flowed anew. Her companion spoke quietly to her. ‘I suggest you remain
here, my dear, until you’re feeling better. I’ll have Abbot come down to attend you.’
Allegra nodded, unable to speak. She felt the carriage rock to a standstill, heard the other occupants descend, but her head remained bowed. How long she sat, alone, she had no idea. She was aware of a movement beside her.
‘My lady, come along. Let me help you to your bedchamber.’
Gratefully Allegra accepted Abbot’s help and completed the manoeuvre to the ground. With her dresser’s arm around her waist she stumbled inside. The distance from the blue corridor, up the stairs and along the blue gallery, had never felt so far. It took a supreme effort of will to keep upright. Eventually she felt the softness of carpet beneath her boots and knew she was almost there.
‘In you come, my lady. Jenny and I will help you disrobe. You sit still; we can manage without any assistance from you.’
They raised her arms, lifted and lowered her, until the cool slither of her nightgown settled around her naked form.
‘There now, lay back and sleep, my lady. You will feel much better in the morning.’
Abbot’s voice was the last thing she remembered before slipping into the first, dreamless, and refreshing sleep she had experienced since her father’s suicide.
The sound of her bed hangings being pulled back and the appetising smell of hot chocolate dragged her from her slumber the next morning. For a moment she remained, eyes closed revelling in the almost forgotten sensation of waking rested. She could hear birds singing and the distant sound of voices coming through the open windows.
She sat up ready to face the day. ‘Good morning, Abbot. Are there rolls and strawberry preserve on my tray? I find I am hungry this morning.’
‘There are not, my lady, but Jenny can go directly to fetch some for you.’ The tray was placed on a bedside table. ‘Shall I pour your chocolate?’
Steaming cup cradled in her hands Allegra settled back in her cocoon of well plumped pillows. She sniffed the strong dark drink with appreciation. Jenny appeared with a plate wrapped in a clean damask cloth. The appetising aroma of freshly baked bread wafted around the room. ‘Put them on the tray, Jenny. I shall help myself presently.’
To Marry a Duke Page 11