“You would?” Jess asked in a voice hoarse with excitement. “That would be a dream come true for Marlena. She adores you.”
“As flattering as that is, it will be work for her to travel and learn with me, hardly a dream. But, if she works and studies hard, the dream will come later. That, I promise you.”
Jess’s insides went hollow. “Travel with you?”
“Yes, of course,” Sarah snapped. “You don’t expect me to mentor her via telegram, do you?”
“No, but…”
“But what?”
“I…just didn’t think you’d be taking her away from me.”
“You are welcome to come along, but you’ll have to pay for yourself. I can’t afford to finance two extra bodies. We will tour for the next six months. Six weeks in each town before we finally return to my residence in Boston.”
“Boston?” The shock was raising Jess’s voice with every word. “So far away.”
“You needn’t worry about her welfare, if that’s what’s troubling you. I have a maid who will be with her at all times. I am a respectable lady. Though there will be parties and social engagements, she will be treated and trained to be a perfect lady. She’ll have the finest comforts, tutors, of course a new wardrobe, and when she finally comes of age and vocal maturation, she’ll embrace the stage.”
Jess was speechless. It all sounded wonderful. Too good to be true, in fact. “What’s in it for you?”
Sarah sat back as if offended, but when Jess’s knowing stare continued to penetrate her false offense, she finally relented and shrugged. “To be a great singer is an accomplishment. To be a great singer’s master is another level of notoriety.”
“And?” Jess asked with a raised eyebrow.
“And in exchange for my years as benefactor, I shall take half the profits from her first five years of performing. After that, we will cut ties and she is free to go where she pleases. By that time, my contacts and promotion will have landed her a large network of managers eager to do business with her.”
Jess hesitated. A more perfect gift could not have landed on her lap, and she couldn’t deny Marlena this precious opportunity. But the stinging reality of saying goodbye, to Marlena or Val, was a pain she wasn’t sure she could bear.
“How soon would you be leaving Virginia City?” she asked.
“Three weeks. Then, we push on for San Francisco.”
It was difficult to breathe with emotions choking her and her insides twisted. A slight movement caught her eye and she saw Marlena’s face peeking around the corner. Jess closed her eyes, wondering how much the girl had heard.
“Come on over here, Marlena,” Jess called and her sister obeyed. She told her of Sarah’s offer, and the girl went white before she let out the loudest whoop and dove into Jess’s arms.
“Please say we can go, Jess. I’d give anything for this.”
Jess bit her bottom lip to keep from crying, but even without the tears, her voice cracked when she spoke.
“Of course we can go.”
Marlena whooped again before throwing herself at Sarah, who yelped in surprise before laughing along with the girl.
“I promise I will be the best student you’ve ever seen. I won’t argue a bit and will do everything you say.”
“Ha!” Jess barked, masking her pain with laughter. “Don’t believe a word of that. She is as obstinate as a mule, but she’ll work harder than one. That’s for sure.”
Marlena went into a flurry of questions for the singer, who was eager to answer them. Jess felt her newfound bliss slipping away and the tears beginning to pool, so she stood to leave.
“I’ll leave you two to get acquainted while I go share the good news with the others,” she said and received two dismissive nods in response. But before she could enter the house Marlena’s excited voice called out beyond Jess’s shoulder.
“Val!” she cried. “It’s the most wonderful news. Jess and I are going to Boston so I can be an opera singer!”
Jess turned and caught the stricken look on Val’s face, and hoped he could read the apology in her eyes. He schooled his expression into enthusiasm as he went to Marlena and lifted her into a hug.
“That’s wonderful, girl,” he said. “You deserve it.”
Jess nearly ran from the porch and disappeared inside the house.
Chapter 36
Jess made her way to the parlor and shut the door tight just in time to release a loud sob into her palm. Her stomach shook as she wept and hot tears poured over her fingers. She sank onto the settee, burying her face in a pillow. A moment later, the door opened and she looked up to find Val standing in the entryway, his face a mask of sorrow and heartache. The sight brought a fresh wave of tears and she hugged the pillow again.
He finally pushed off of the door and went to a knee in front of her, gathering her into his arms. It was several long moments before she could speak, but she told him about hers and Sarah’s conversation. He held her to him and shushed her while he stroked her hair.
“My heart is broken,” she choked and shook her head. “No matter what I do, my heart is broken.”
Val caught her tears with his thumbs and cupped her cheeks. She sniffled and held onto his wrists. Slowly, he leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on her lips. The second they touched, all of her longing for him poured into the kiss and she wrapped her arms around his neck and deepened the connection of their mouths. He answered in kind and their bodies slammed together, creating a heat that swirled around them and took over the room.
When they broke apart for breath, he leaned his forehead against hers while they heaved. His hand cradled the back of her head, the other wrapped tightly around her waist.
“There’s only one thing left to do,” he whispered. He leaned back to look her in the eye. “Marry me.”
She sucked in a breath so sharply it hurt her chest. “Val…I…,” she shook her head softly. “I can’t let Marlena go alone.”
“I know,” he said. “We’ll go with her.”
She sat up, stunned. In the last month he had sacrificed over and over for her, and what had she given him? He’d fought hard for years to build a life in this place. She couldn’t let him sacrifice all of that time and effort.
“I can’t let you do that, Val,” she said as she shook her head. “You left the east coast to make a life out west. I can’t let you walk away from all you’ve earned, and especially not for a life you’d resent.”
“What are you talking about?” His voice was tight and agitated.
“You and Morgan are close, as close as Marlena and I. You don’t want to be on the other side of the country from him. And you would feel suffocated in a city like Boston. You crave the space of the west. And…and besides. You don’t really want to make me your wife.”
“Oh, I don’t, huh?” he snapped. “What makes you say that?”
Her eyes hardened. “The fact that you went to Juliet’s last week, for starters.”
He sat back on his heels and batted the air. “You’re grasping for reasons because you’re afraid.”
“Oh, you mean you didn’t go to Juliet’s?”
“I did go, but I didn’t do anything with anyone there. Truth is, I haven’t touched any of those women since the morning I woke up in an ice bath on your couch.”
“That’s not true. I’ve seen you there several times.”
“I didn’t say I didn’t go there. I said I didn’t touch any of the women. I wanted to, believe me. I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. Once you got under my skin, none of them had the same appeal anymore. You are the woman I want, the only woman I want. Haven’t I made that obvious? In case I haven’t, let me tell you. I love you, Jess. All right? I love you. I love you. I love you. How many times do I have to say it before you’ll believe me? ”
“And what about a family of your own?” Jess said softly. When he said nothing, she closed her eyes and swallowed.
“What?” he said, his voice almost a whisper.
“What about children, Val?”
Several long moments passed while Val’s eyes flitted around the room. It was clear he couldn’t reconcile his thoughts to a life without children. He deserved children. And the world deserved a few more Vals. He was everything a woman could hope for and more. She calmly stood and looked down at him as he still rested on his knee.
“This move to Boston appears to be the best thing for us,” she said. “It’s best we separate now rather than later.”
“No,” he said as he shot to his feet. “It’s not best at all. I don’t care if you can’t have children.”
“I think you do.” She cupped his cheek and sighed. “Your reaction and your words are saying different things, Val. You hesitated for a reason.”
He huffed and splayed his hands out wide. “You can’t knock a man off his tracks like that and expect him to bounce back in an instant. Of course I had to think about it, but not for very long. I’m telling you. I don’t care, not about any of it. Children, Boston…”
“Leaving Morgan?” she added when he couldn’t bring himself to say the words.
He took a deep breath. “It’ll bother me. No lie. But it would bother me more to be without you.”
She sighed and rubbed her forehead, more conflicted than ever. Before either could speak again, Marlena burst into the room, appearing not to notice the tension and anguish in the air as she rambled excitedly about her life to come. Jess painted a smile on her face and pretended to listen with rapt attention to the details of Marlena’s regiment, but her insides felt hollow. When Val excused himself from the room and disappeared without a backward glance, the broken pieces of her heart tumbled through her insides, slicing them until she could no longer breathe, and she retired to her room.
For all the crying, for all of the emotional upheaval, her weary mind would not let her body rest. Marlena entered the room, and Jess barely heard the soft shut of the door. Her gaze remained fixed on the window pane, the pale moon hovering amid a sprinkle of stars. Only when she felt the dip of the mattress did she turn to find Marlena sitting on the edge of the bed. Her face was stoic, her piercing violet eyes steady and sure.
“Jess,” she began. “I want you to stay in Virginia City.”
Jess frowned and sat up. “What do you mean?”
“This is where you belong. Here, with Val.”
“No, sweetie. I appreciate you saying this, but I will never leave you.”
“I know you won’t,” she said, her lips curving slightly as she grabbed Jess’s hand. “So, I’m leaving you.”
Jess shook her head and bit her trembling lower lip. Eyes she thought were dry filled again with tears. “Marlena…”
“No, Jess,” she whispered. “You’ve done everything you needed to do for me. You raised me, protected me, kept me alive, taught me valuable skills. And you’ve given me the greatest thing I could have ever hoped for. My dream.” Marlena’s eyes glistened. “Now, I’m giving you yours. That man loves you, and you love him. I won’t let you lose another part of yourself. So, I’m saving you, again.”
They laughed through their tears, and Jess wiped her sister’s wet cheeks. “Who will save me if I don’t have you?”
Marlena smiled through her tears. “Val.”
Jess stared at her sister and saw an emerging young lady in place of the girl she so lovingly reared for the past thirteen years. Morgan’s words at the ranch echoed and she knew she would have to learn to let her go. She smoothed a lock of hair off of Marlena’s forehead.
“You’re turning into a fine young woman,” she said.
“If I’m half the woman you are, I’ll be pleased and proud.”
They reached for one another and held tight, allowing the last few sniffles to linger on each other’s shoulders.
“I’m going to miss you so much,” Jess said into Marlena’s hair.
“Me, too, but I promise I’ll write you every week. More, if I have the time.”
“If you ever want to come home or need me for anything, send a telegram and I’ll be there as fast as humanly possible. I mean it.”
“I will.”
“And if that woman abuses you in any way, let me know and I’ll kill her myself.”
Marlena laughed. “I will.”
“Always keep a pistol strapped to your person…
“…And an eye on my back,” Marlena finished. “I know, Jess.”
They pulled apart and Marlena wiped the wetness from beneath her eyes. “I told Val you’d be staying.”
Jess straightened. “You did? When?”
“About an hour ago. I told him you’d be staying whether you liked it or not.”
“What did he say?”
She giggled. “He said I was just like you, and then he gave me the tightest hug ever.” Jess imagined the scene and smirked. “You can go find him if you want,” Marlena said.
Jess shook her head and grabbed Marlena’s hand. “Since you already told him, I can wait to talk to him. I’ll have him the rest of my life. I’ve only got you for another three weeks. Tell me more about what Sarah told you. I want to know everything.”
They laughed and talked until the early morning hours when Marlena finally succumbed to sleep in Jess’s arms. The rest of the night passed slowly, with sleep evading Jess. When the moon disappeared completely and the sky took on a purple hue she rose and stretched her legs. She put on her robe and crept down the stairs and out onto the back porch to watch the sunrise, but she was not alone. Val sat in a chair, wrapped in a blanket, and stared toward the horizon, where the first ribbons of gold began to break over the hills.
“Have you been out here all night?” she asked as she came to stand beside his chair.
He nodded. “Been thinking about a few things.”
“Yes, me too.”
“Oh, I’m sure I know what you’ve been thinking about,” he said in a derisive tone. “Let me guess. You’ve been thinking of all the reasons why I shouldn’t love you or want you, and that it’d be best if you went to Boston to set me free.” He looked over at her, but she didn’t answer. She could tell he’d been composing his speech all night, and she would allow him to speak his mind.
He snorted and shook his head. “Let me tell you something. I can do my own thinking and concluding. I may like to joke and laugh, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have pride. And when I decide I want something, I don’t need anybody else telling me I’m wrong. And I don’t need anybody else making decisions for me. You got that?”
“Got it,” she said.
“Good. Glad we got that out of the way.”
She rolled her eyes and smirked. “Anything else you have to say?”
“Yes. Emily offered to have the solicitor sign the mine back over to me.”
“That’s wonderful. I’m very happy for you.”
“I turned her down,” he said, cutting off her smile and joy.
“Why?”
“I’ve decided to go in with Morgan. There’s a pretty piece of property adjacent to his.” He tilted his head to the side to peer up at her. “You think thirty grand is enough to persuade the owners to move out?”
“I think you have a pretty good chance of success, yes.”
“Yeah, I reckon, too. I figure with Morgan’s and my cattle experience and your expertise, we could turn this into a pretty lucrative operation.”
“My expertise?” she said with an incredulous cough.
“Of course. You’ll be an invaluable asset to the business.”
She put her hands on her hips. “You’re bold as brass, Valentine Kelly. What makes you think I’d go into business down in the valley with you? Just because I’m staying in town doesn’t mean I want to be a cattleman.”
He pursed his lips. “You won’t be a cattleman. You’ll be a cattleman’s wife.”
“Oh, I will, will I?” Her voice was haughty, but her body was alive with a euphoric giddiness.
“Damn right you will be,” he answered. “You thi
nk I’d leave a bunch of trouble like you loose on the world? Not a chance. It’s my civic duty to take you off the market.”
She snorted. “Very patriotic of you. What if I say no?”
“You won’t. I’ll tell you exactly what you’re going to do. First, you’re going to sit that gorgeous ass of yours on my lap. Then, I’m going to ask you, and you’ll say yes, because in spite of everything you’re afraid of, what you fear most is walking away from me. And that’s good, because that means you love me as much as I love you. And I don’t give one damn about anything else.”
Her heart fluttered and knocked about in her chest. It took all of her will to fight back the smile trying to emerge.
“That sounds like a very decent proposal. There’s just one problem with it.”
“What’s that?”
“I’m not going to sit on your lap. If you want to marry me you’ve got to come to me proper and–”
He grabbed her wrist and pulled her down to his lap where he kissed her fully and deeply. When they broke apart, he stroked her cheek while they gazed into each other’s eyes.
“Now, for the last time,” he prefaced, and Jess was already giggling. “Jessica Beauregard, will you marry me?”
In answer, she grabbed his face and brought her lips to his in a long, tender kiss. “I love you, Valentine Kelly.” She smiled and pecked his lips again. “And in case you’re wondering, that’s a yes.”
They kissed again before she brought her legs up to curl in his lap. He wrapped the blanket around them both as she rested her head against his shoulder. The first rays of the hello-sun bathed their faces in warm, orange light.
“I can’t believe you fought to keep your mine only to give it up in the end,” she said.
Val chuckled and she felt the soft ripple of his chest beneath her. “Morgan was right.” She looked up in askance. “He said I’d sell off as soon as something tempting came along.”
“You didn’t have to sell it for me, Val. I would have been happy with you no matter what work you did.”
“I know, but being above ground has much more appeal now. Why would I spend twelve hours underground when I can spend it with you topside? When I saw how much you thrived being in your element at Morgan’s, it was an easy choice for me.”
Desert Sunrise (Love in the Sierras Book 2) Page 25