The Dilemma: A Her Choice Story

by Megan McCoy

  “I’d tell him, though. He wouldn’t be happy if he found out on his own,” Matt said.

  “How would he find out?” she asked, looking up to the moon.

  The moon was full and gorgeous tonight, Matt noted. He should bring Liz out to show her. “He has a way of finding things out. I don’t want to be part of keeping something from him.”

  “I’m not asking you to,” Candy said sharply. “And I’m kind of irritated you thought I was.”

  “Thought you were what?” A slow deep voice came in front behind him.

  Damn, the old man moved quietly. Matt had taken that for granted for so long he never thought about it anymore.

  “Hey, Dad,” Matt said, not moving.

  Candy stood up quickly, though. “I just came for a walk and ran into Matt doing the same thing.”

  “I figured that,” he came into view. “I was just checking on you. You’ve been jumpy as a scalded cat all day. Figured you needed a board meeting, till you decided to tell me what was going on.” He looked pointedly at Matt, “This got anything to do with you?”

  “No, sir,” Matt said, “Just walking out my own issues.”

  “Well, we can discuss yours tomorrow,” he said, “right now Candy and I are going to have a discussion about secret keeping.”

  “Jeb, it’s not what you think,” he heard her start to defend herself. He knew his dad better than she did, and knew what was going to happen.

  Yeah. “We can discuss anything you want after our board meeting,” his dad’s voice rumbled in his ears.

  “No!” he heard her shriek.

  Matt tried not to let his lips twitch, even though he felt a twinge of sympathy for her, as he stepped back on the path and headed back toward his house. Not thirty steps away, he stopped for just a minute and listened. Funny how all well paddled women said the same words, “Please, no, stop, don’t, please, okay, okay, not there, I’ll be good, no more please sir!” It was like they’d been given a script of silly words to say when there were no intentions of stopping till none of those words made sense anymore.

  Candy sounded just like Liz did when she was getting paddled. Too amusing. His dad got right to it, though. He would have at least given Liz a few minutes to explain what was going on, but whatever worked for them.

  Stopping another few feet away, he thought, if Liz kept a need like he had now, from him, he’d be blistering her butt till she couldn’t sit for a week. He owed her the courtesy and respect to at least tell her something of what he was feeling. He’d find a good time and they would sit and have a long talk. He kept walking toward home while the sound of Candy’s sobs faded in the background.

  Damn. His dad was good at that paddling thing. Wincing, he felt a bit sorry for his new mommy, but not sorry enough that he’d stop spanking Liz. It was odd how such a negative thing really made a positive impact on a relationship. He wasn’t going to think about it, though.

  Quietly, he let himself back in the house and stripped his clothes off and cuddled up to his sweet girl.

  “There you are,” she said, still half asleep. “Missed you.”

  “Missed you, too,” he whispered. “Night, baby. Love you.”

  Sighing, she pressed her body against him and he held her close till her breathing settled back down. Staring at the ceiling, he knew he couldn’t ask her to leave here with him. He had to ask her something else.

  Their time would come. A few more years and Ben would be off to college, and he and Liz could jet around the world if they wanted to. Till then, a couple of vacations a year could ease his travel ache. She was worth it. First he needed her to feel safe and happy and secure in this place and he needed to make her place in the family secure. Legal. Then they could think about traveling. In the meantime, they could be visiting places they’d like to explore, maybe live in, maybe never go back to, again.

  As he shut his eyes, all he could think about was the job Candy was offered. A few weeks here and there, stepping in and running a hotel. He could do that job. But. He had a reason to stay here now. Drifting off to sleep, he tried to feel at peace with his decision.

  Chapter Seven

  Candy headed out to work, trying not to feel sorry for herself. She had a long busy day ahead of her and the fact moving hurt right now was no one’s problem but hers. It was her fault. She knew it. It wasn’t even really a fault. Just was a fact. She messed up, and hadn’t told Jeb something she needed to tell him. He’d bared her butt and blistered her with his belt, till she howled and didn’t think she could stand it. It was basically—it was—the worst spanking he’d ever given her, and there had been quite a few in their relationship. He did not stand for lying, or secret keeping, or a half a dozen other things, and instead of yelling or the silent treatment that other guys did, he just put her over his knee and paddled her. She didn’t do much to deserve a spanking, and most of them were either fun sexy, foreplay ones, or much milder than last nights. He’d been really upset with her and took it out on her bottom.

  When they first started their relationship, he let it be known he’d be a spanking partner, and while she’d never been spanked, she accepted it. At first, there was some warning, he’d tell her it was coming or she should watch it because she was getting close, but now he just did what she called a yank and spank. Just ‘drop your pants’ and all she could do was hope he wasn’t unbuckling his belt. Last night he did.

  Sometimes a spanking actually helped her. Her job, despite what people thought, could be highly stressful. In the height of the summer season, she often had over seventy employees and dozens of cabins of clients to oversee. She knew she made it look easy, from her years of hotel experience, but occasionally, he knew what she needed and paddled her till she cried her stress out. Last night had not been a stress relief spanking.

  She’d finally done that spanking dance she’d heard about when he finished with her. She could not turn the burn down no matter how she danced and high stepped and rubbed her hot, throbbing and swollen cheeks. He’d sat there, calmly, quietly, and waited for her to come to him.

  Which, of course, she did, throwing herself into his arms and sobbing for forgiveness. Why she thought not telling him was a good idea, she had no clue. What was she trying to save him from? Whatever it was, she wasn’t going to try and save him from anything again. There were many things she was, but stupid wasn’t one of them. There would be nothing she would keep from him anymore. She told him about the job offer and he’d asked simply, “Was that butt blistering and all your stress about hiding it from me worth it?” The answer was, of course, no and no. She learned her lesson.

  Wincing, she sat down in Mariah’s kitchen, and looked around. Mariah was wanting to semi retire after this summer. She said she’d come in for vacations or to help, but she wanted time with her grandkids and she’d been looking for a replacement for her, for two years now. They had hired a couple people for Mariah to train, but none of them had worked out. She knew no one was irreplaceable though and her talk today was to tell Mariah about the new chef coming in for an interview later in the week. She had big hopes for this one.

  Where was Mariah? She was usually here this time of day. Maybe out in her herb garden. She’d sit and work a bit and see if she showed up in a few minutes. Or maybe she’d stand up and walk to the garden. Neither one felt like a very good option. Maybe she’d go home and take some aspirin. She figured she could walk off the soreness, but geez, that had not happened yet. She was still as sore as she’d been when she got dressed. Looking in the mirror after her shower, she’s seen a few welts and several bruises. Jeb had meant business. Luckily, he held and cuddled her the rest of the night and she no longer felt bad about not telling him. He’d told her once ‘punished and done.’ That was why, he’d told her after another particularly hurtful spanking, that he made sure he did a good job. He spanked, or belted, or paddled to the point where you just knew you would never do it again. Then he always held her and made sure she knew she was loved after. If only
he didn’t spank so hard. His only fault. Otherwise, he was the perfect husband. She was so darn lucky.

  Someone came in the back door that lead out to the garden, and she looked up, expecting Mariah. Instead it was Matt. Candy couldn’t help the blush that rose and covered her face. He had to hear what his dad did to her last night. She knew it was less than thirty seconds after he turned around she started begging and less than a minute after he walked away, that she’d started screeching. Jeb had spared not a second before her spanking began. It was one thing for Matt and Blaze to know Jeb desired her, and quite another for him to know she got spanked like a naughty child. She was for all intents and purposes his boss, after all.

  Sort of, anyway. He was part owner of the place, but she ran the business side of things. He was the one who’d actually hired her, just for a summer season a few years back when their business was starting to take off, and he decided they needed someone to guide them in the right direction. Her background as a resort hotel manager, and overseeing hotel openings was exactly what they’d needed. She had four months off before her next job, and wanted something different. Squirming in her seat, she sure hadn’t been expecting this kind of different.

  Looking studiously at her laptop, she said, softly, “Hi, Matt.”

  “Hi, Mommy, how’s the sore butt?” he asked as if he were asking how her headache was and she wanted to smack him.

  Rising above the teasing, she lifted her eyes and glared at him, “Hush, child. I know where your daddy keeps his razor strop.”

  “I just bet you do,” he grinned. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to get you in trouble last night.”

  “You didn’t get me in trouble,” she said, sighing. “I got me in trouble, but I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ask you to keep a secret from your dad. I apologize. I was really just venting a bit.”

  “I understand,” Matt pulled some lemonade from the refrigerator. “Want some?” At her nod, he started to pour them both a glass and continued, “I was thinking through some things too, or I would have been more receptive. You can talk to me anytime, you know.”

  “Thanks,” she said, both to the ice cold glass of fresh lemonade he handed her and his words. “I appreciate that.”

  “What are you up to today?” he asked, obviously trying to change the subject. She hoped the blush on her cheeks went away soon.

  “Waiting on Mariah, to talk to her about the new chef applying at the end of the week,” she said.

  “Think this one will work out?” He asked.

  “Who knows? So far we’ve not had much luck,” she replied. “It’s hard to bring someone in. This isn’t really a thriving metropolis where a lot of chefs want to be, you know. This one said she spent a few vacations here and really wants to come back. At least she knows what she’s getting into. I hope it works out.”

  “Me, too,” he said. “Mariah! Want a glass of lemonade? I’ll pour, then I have to leave. Work to do.”

  Candy saw her shake her head, and put the large basket of green, leafy things on the table. As he left the kitchen, Candy could feel her face cool. Well, next time she saw him, it would be easier. She shoved the thought of Matt spanking Liz out of her brain as she turned to Mariah to talk about the interviewer for her job.

  Chapter Eight

  “Are we there yet?” Holly asked, half whining, half teasing.

  “Are we?” Eric answered patiently.

  “No,” she sighed heavily and looked out the window. It was just a long drive to Southern Illinois, but it was getting prettier all the time. The flat farmland was changing to soft hills and so many trees. She remembered this from two summers ago when they first came here, and changed Liz’s life. Meredith’s too. The three of them had been in a car accident, and Meredith was almost recovered from it, finally. The wreck had shattered her leg and it took over six surgeries and over a year of therapy for her to get back some of her mobility. Ethan had stepped up, moved her into his house and devoted much time and resources to caring for her. Meredith, who, despite having a thriving real estate career, seemed a timid soul, but was now doing well, and seemed stronger, emotionally as well as physically.

  Liz had met Matt, and didn’t even go back home after the two weeks of vacation they had booked. She and Ben had stayed another two weeks, though Ethan had stayed longer, till he could get Meredith released. Then Liz and Matt did a long distance relationship till Matt asked her to move in. Liz talked it over with Ben and he’d agreed to move. He wasn’t happy at his school and thought it would be a change. It seemed to be working out for them, but Eric needed to play big brother and go make sure everyone was doing well.

  She actually liked that part of him and at least he didn’t bring that nasty butt plug he’d put in last time they’d come this way. That still made her shudder. She sure wasn’t going to mention it, though, in case he thought of it again. He hadn’t made her get naked in the car this time either. Maybe he didn’t love her anymore. Life was hard.

  “What’s our plan when we get there, besides poking our noses in your sister’s life?” She asked him. “I’m not going to the spa, so you are just stuck entertaining me.”

  “Run around naked in the woods?” he suggested. “Turn the beach by the lake into a nudist beach? Go for a naked buggy ride?”

  Smiling, Holly shook her head at him, “I’m sensing a theme here.”

  “We can start it right now,” he suggested. “You could strip and see if there is anything you can do about this pesky thing growing in my pants.”

  Oh, good. He did still love her.

  Obligingly, she kicked out of her sandals.

  * * *

  Liz wandered out to the fragrant herb garden. She’d only planted a small one this year, but hoped she’d have a real kitchen garden soon. Chives, basil, oregano, dill and parsley. Just a few little things, but to her they represented roots. Matt had brought her a small rose bush that they’d planted together on the east side of the house. He’d promised her one a year, and she could imagine a thriving, heady with scent, garden of color and permanence. It was all she’d ever wanted. Roots. Her own place. Safety, security, and a family to love.

  Her husband, through no fault of his own, had left her. She’d thought they would be together forever. After he died, she’d flitted here and there, doing all the things they told you not to do after a spouse died. She sold their house, because she didn’t think she could afford the payments. She moved. She moved her kid a few too many times. She changed careers. Dated a few too many men who weren’t good for her. Five years after Troy’s death, she’d come to her senses, settled down, started focusing on her kid and her career. She hoped that eventually she could make up to Ben the years she wasn’t the best mom she could have been. Who knew, though? Would he tell his kids one day about his mom’s wild side with a smile or with deep unabated resentment?

  Maybe he just didn’t notice? Or thought all parents did that? All she could do now was the best she could do for him. This place, Rose’s Ranch was it.

  Ben clunked down the porch stairs, “Hey, Mom, Uncle Eric here yet? I want to show him my new fishing rod Matt got me.”

  “Should be here any minute now.” She smiled him. He was growing up so fast, and seemed to love it here. “Want to walk up to the den with me and wait for them?”

  He shrugged, playing cool, and said, “Sure, why not.”

  Silly how that made her heart sing. Walking together, they looked at the roses planted along the paths, and she adored that she was part of the reason they were looking so beautiful. She felt part of a generational heritage, something she had never felt before. Maybe one day, Ben’s wife would be helping with the roses. That thought made her both happy and a little sad.

  Suddenly, he broke into a run. “There they are!” Liz laughed, watching him be so happy and excited to see his aunt and uncle. Sometimes he forgot to be a sullen teenager and she lived for those moments.

  Giving a small skip, she picked up her steps too. Big brother was here for a we
ek! Yay!

  Flinging herself in his arms two minutes later, she loved the way it felt. Like she was a little girl again, with her daddy. Eric reminded her a lot of her dad.

  “Hey, Elizabeth! I’m glad to see you, too,” he smiled down at her. “How are you?”

  “I’m great, how was your trip down?” she asked.

  “Wonderful.” Holly said, as she held her arms out for a hug, too. “So glad to be back here again. We made some good memories last time. Even if we left part of us behind,” she teased.

  “We’ll make some great memories this time,” Liz promised. “I have an in with one of the bosses.”

  “You have an in with all the bosses,” Candy’s voice came from the porch of the den. “Did you forget? Hello, Holly, Eric, welcome back to Rose’s Ranch. We’ve been loving having your sister here. Thank you for sharing her with us.”

  “You’re welcome. She behaving herself?” Eric teased.

  “As far as I know, but you might want to ask Matt about that,” Candy said.

  “Oh, I will,” Eric promised while Holly elbowed him in the stomach.

  “Seriously? Behave yourself,” she hissed at him.

  Casually, he reached over and swatted her on the butt, “You, too.”

  She wrinkled her nose and him and giggled. “Yes, sir!” Turning to Candy, she said, “I’m ready to check in, get changed, and unpacked. Can’t wait to look around see what all has changed around here.”

  Liz shook her head as Ben started chattering about his new fishing rod to Eric while she, Holly, and Candy walked back into the office.

  “Men,” Holly rolled her eyes. “What’re you going to do?”

  “Just love them. It’s all we can do,” Candy said. She walked over the desk, and said, “We’ve been all automated since you were last here. Love my computers! Makes everything so much easier especially at tax time.” Holly handed over her card, and Candy ran it through, and handed it back, with a few pieces of paper.