Josh lifted an eyebrow as I paused.
“Boyfriend?” he finished.
“Yeah. I guess I hadn’t used that word yet, so I didn’t want to just throw it out there.”
“If I could tell people about us, I’d be calling you my girlfriend every chance I got.”
I smiled and swung our hands between us. “Did you have any serious girlfriends back home?”
“Very smooth segue there.”
“That was pretty slick, huh?” I laughed. “I was just curious. You learned how to kiss like a boss somewhere.”
“Having you tell me I kiss like a boss totally makes up for my epic failure at Seven Minutes in Heaven. In fact, I think it’s the greatest compliment I’ve ever received.”
I patted his chest. “I’m glad I could make your day. Now, back to my question…”
“What question was that?” He furrowed his brow with exaggerated confusion. “I’m still thinking about showing you more of my boss moves.”
“Nice try but not quite slick enough.”
“Ah, now I remember. The answer is no. I dated a couple of girls but nothing serious.” He angled down close to my ear. “No one could compare to this one girl I couldn’t get out of my head.”
I grinned and pressed my shoulder to his. I still couldn’t wrap my mind around the fact Josh had crushed on me for eight years. I’d been thinking back to all the times we’d crossed paths at events, trying to remember if he’d given any hint of his feelings. But that would’ve been hard for him to do in the few words we’d spoken to each other.
Our walk led us in a circle back to the commercial area, and we stopped at a café for a quick lunch before returning to the car. I drove us west to the farthest town on the island and up the hill to the lookout for the Gay Head Cliffs. A few people stood along the wood fence taking photos of the popular tourist attraction.
“Whoa, this is a killer view,” Josh said as we walked up to the fence.
The Atlantic Ocean and Vineyard Sound stretched in either direction, and below us the sparkling blue water crashed in waves at the base of the tall clay cliffs. Only a small strip of beach protected the clay from the constant onslaught. In the distance the Gay Head Lighthouse stood watch over the picturesque scene.
“This is one of Em and Sergei’s favorite places,” I said. “They named Quinn after the town here, Aquinnah.”
Josh rested his elbows on the fence and swiveled his head to take in the panoramic landscape. “I can see why they love it.”
“When Em was competing they used to come here before events to help calm her nerves. I guess we’re continuing that tradition since Skate America is next week.”
“Are you feeling really nervous about it?”
I hesitated to answer. Josh was my boyfriend, and I wanted to share my worries with him, but he was also my competition. I didn’t think he’d gain confidence from my nervousness as Stephanie probably would, but it still felt weird to discuss it with him.
“We had a great start in Paris, but the field next week will be even tougher,” I said.
“Yeah, you have to compete against me,” Josh said with a devilish smile.
I looked at him with raised eyebrows, but maybe he had the right idea. Perhaps the best way to play the situation was to not take ourselves too seriously. The competition was going to be tense enough.
“And we’re going to kick your ass,” I said.
He laughed heartily, crinkling the corners of his eyes. “So we’re going full out with the trash talk.”
“Hey, you started it.”
“You know I was just kidding, right?”
“I know. I really do want you to skate great.” I put my arm around him. “But I still wanna beat you.”
“You’re lucky that’s one of the things I like most about you — how competitive you are.”
“Can you remind Mark of that next time he says I’m going soft by being nice to you?”
“Soft?” He tucked some wind-blown strands of hair behind my ear. “Soft wouldn’t tell me she’s going to kick my ass.”
I slid my hand down into the back pocket of his jeans and squeezed. “And a very cute one it is.”
****
“Cancelled?” I repeated to the Steamship Authority employee. “But this is the last ferry out tonight.”
“I’m sorry, but no go with these high winds. This is the third trip tonight we’ve had to cancel.”
My hair whipped around me as Josh and I got back into my car. The storm we’d expected was apparently arriving sooner and had brought with it gale-force winds. We were stuck like chuck on the island with no way to get home.
“We’ll have to find a hotel,” Josh said.
I combed my fingers through my hair to untangle the knots. Spending money on a hotel room hadn’t been in my plans for the trip. And would we get one room or two? That could be an awkward decision. But did we have any other options? I rested my head against the seat and thought about the phone call I had to make to Em.
That’s it!
“Em’s aunt and uncle have a summer house here. I’ve been there before. I have to let her know I’m not coming home, so I’ll ask if we can stay there. Well, ‘we’ being me and Meredith according to the story I told her this morning.”
“How are we going to get in?”
“Hopefully they have a spare key under the rug or something.”
As we pulled away from the harbor, I called Em and fumbled my way through the lie that I was with Meredith. She gave me directions to the house and said she’d call the neighbor Mrs. Bloom to let her know we’d be coming for the spare key.
A light drizzle began to fall as we drove back west across the island to Chilmark, which wasn’t far from where we’d been earlier at the cliffs. When we arrived at the house, I told Josh to slink low in his seat so Mrs. Bloom couldn’t see him. Even though it was almost ten o’clock at night, I didn’t want to take any chances. Didn’t need any nosy neighbors reporting back to Em.
Once I had the key, Josh and I ran through the then steady rain and entered the dark two-story house. We slipped off our wet shoes in the foyer and got our bearings. Light from the wall of windows in the open kitchen allowed me to see shapes in the living room, so I turned on the floor lamp beside the sofa.
“There’s a piano!” Josh headed straight for the upright that sat next to the large entertainment center.
“You can give me a private concert.”
He smiled and tinkled a few of the keys. “I was planning to do that at my house when we got back tonight, so this is perfect.”
I looked around the cozy living room. Unlike Josh’s house, there were personal touches everywhere — photos of Em’s family in frames of all shapes and sizes and DVDs, books and games spilling out of the entertainment center.
“We should make a fire,” Josh said as he walked toward the stone fireplace in the corner of the room.
I put my hands on my hips. “What do you know about fireplaces, California boy?”
“One of my buddies at our old rink… his parents had a cabin up in Big Bear, and we used to build fires there all the time.”
He expertly moved around the hearth, and I sat on the couch. I’d wanted to avoid being alone with Josh all day at his house, and here we were, about to be alone all night. I chewed on my thumbnail as I watched him stack logs onto the burning tinder.
I didn’t know what he was thinking about tonight. If he was like any other guy, he had to be thinking sex was a definite possibility, especially with the romantic atmosphere. Of course, this was a guy who had taken eight years to kiss me, so maybe he didn’t have any expectations. But it might be better if I just put my feelings out there and avoided any awkwardness later.
Or I could end up making everything more awkward.
Sweat collected on my palms, and I scrubbed my hands on my jeans. Should I say it or not? My knees jiggled in time with the quick beat of my heart. Tell him, already!
“We’re not having
sex tonight,” I blurted out as I shot to my feet.
Josh was returning the poker to the set of tools, and he dropped it, loudly clanging the brass.
“Wha… what?” he stammered.
“It’s just that we’re alone here on this island with the rain and the fireplace, and it’s all very romance novel-ish, and you know what happens in the books in those scenes, and I’m not ready to go there, so I thought I’d get that out of the way now in case you were thinking something might happen.” I caught my breath after spouting the longest run-on ramble in history.
He stood motionless, his eyes still a tad wide. After a few seconds of tense silence, he came over to me and slid his hands inside my collar, tickling the nape of my neck. The care in his touch slowed my anxiety.
“I’m happy just being here with you,” he said. “We don’t have to do anything.”
My body relaxed, and I wound my arms around his waist. “Well, we can do some things.”
A slow smile spread across his face. “Just so you know, I wasn’t plotting to seduce you with my piano-playing and fire-building.”
I laughed, and he continued, “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t thinking about… possibilities, but I’m no stranger to waiting, so we don’t have to rush anything.”
I hugged him tight. “Sorry for making all this drama out of it.”
“Don’t ever be sorry for telling me how you feel. That’s another one of my favorite things about you — you’re not afraid to speak up.”
I bit my lip. Should I give full disclosure? I wanted him to know where I was coming from and why I felt the way I did, and the only way to do that would be through complete honesty.
“While we’re laying it all out there, I um…” I loosened my hold around him so I could see his face. “I’ve never slept with anyone, so that’s part of the reason I want to make sure I’m ready before…”
His lips curled upward. “I haven’t either.”
“Oh.” It wasn’t a complete shock, but I still needed a moment to process. “I guess we’re more than just karaoke virgins together, then.”
His smile opened wider. “And we know how that turned out. We rocked that stage hard.”
“We did. We were smokin’ hot.”
He grasped my hips and gazed intently at me. “Proof that the first time can be amazing.”
The passionate intensity in his eyes slayed me. I leaned into him, and our lips met halfway. One long breathless kiss led to another and another until I finally broke away.
“You promised me a concert,” I said between pants.
Josh squeezed my waist. “I thought we could get started on those ‘some things’ you said we could do.”
“All in good time. Since you’re a pro at waiting.” I grinned.
“I do have a new song I think you’re going to love. If I was plotting to seduce you, this would definitely do the trick.”
“Oh really?” I turned him toward the piano. “I’m so ready then.”
He settled onto the bench, and I took one of the blankets from the couch and spread it over the carpet. As I grabbed a couple of throw pillows to make myself even more comfy, Josh warmed up with a few easy bars.
He looked over at me stretched out on the blanket. “I’ll start with one of your classical favorites.”
I knew the piece from the first notes — “Clair de Lune.” My eyes stayed on Josh’s hands as he played. They were a beautiful instrument themselves, gliding so smoothly over the keys, applying both strength and softness when needed. I would happily be his human piano…
When the song ended, I applauded and Josh gave me a little bow.
“And now for something new,” he said.
He rubbed his hands together and stared long and hard at the keys, studying them for a quiet minute before he set his fingers on them and began to play.
I listened closely and soon recognized the music as part of the score of Pride and Prejudice. Josh must’ve remembered that the movie had been playing in the background when we’d shared our first kiss. The melody was one of the most gorgeous parts of the soundtrack, and I closed my eyes and imagined us skating to it.
After the music stopped, I opened my eyes and found Josh watching me.
“I hope I didn’t put you to sleep,” he said.
“No, I was just having a little daydream about us on the ice. I love that piece so much.” I got up and sat on the bench with him. “The movie will always be special to me now.”
“I recognized the movie when I was at your house because Steph watches it all the time, so I looked up the soundtrack. It has great music for skating.”
“It’s so amazing how you can just listen to a song and learn how to play it so perfectly. It’s like magic.”
“Do you wanna learn how to play a few notes?”
I nodded eagerly. “Can we do the beginning of the Muse song?”
He patted his lap. “Sit here and I’ll show you.”
I scooted onto his legs, and he peeked around my shoulder at the piano. “Your hands will start here.”
He delicately placed my fingers on the appropriate keys and then covered my hands with his so he could guide them. I shivered as his forearms rubbed lightly over mine. Slowly he showed me which keys to use, making the music come alive. We repeated the few notes again and again until he let go, and I played them confidently all on my own.
“That was beautiful, Court,” he said softly.
I turned to him and nuzzled his cheek. “Would you play the whole song for me?”
We shifted so I sat between his thighs, and with his arms surrounding me, I felt the tension and release in his body as the high and low notes came. My eyes followed every movement of his fingers as they skated across the keys, again imagining them doing the same melodic dance across my skin.
When he hit the final note, he lingered on the keys, and I reached out and touched the back of his hand with my fingertips.
“I love watching your hands when you play.” I brushed lightly from his knuckles to his wrist. “They’re very sexy.”
He buried his face in my hair and then swept the long curls away from my neck, kissing the tender spot below my ear. I let out a soft breath and leaned back against him. He turned me so I was sideways, and our eyes connected, then our lips. As our kisses grew fuller and longer, Josh guided us both from the bench and over to the blanket.
We eased down together on our knees, and my hands slipped under his T-shirt and along his waistband, getting a tantalizing taste of his warm skin. It only made me starve for more.
I nudged up his shirt, and Josh did the rest, tossing it aside. I placed my palm on his smooth chest and felt the rapid thump-thump of his heart. Mine was beating with the same heady rhythm. Leaning forward, I touched my lips to his neck and kissed my way across his tense shoulder. His arms tightened around me, his hands massaging my back more urgently. He laid me onto the blanket, and I opened my mouth to him, drinking in all his hunger and need. His lips felt like fire, and his tongue fanned the flames.
His hand moved down my shirt, opening the line of buttons, and his mouth followed, leaving a trail of kisses from my neck to my stomach. The heat of his breath on my belly made me squirm with desire, and I lifted up, letting Josh slide the shirt from my shoulders. His eyes lowered to my body, and his breaths came harder and quicker. He tangled his fingers in my hair and captured my mouth once more. I fell into him, and we tumbled onto the blanket, Josh pinned beneath me.
I kissed his silky lips again and again and didn’t realize he’d unhooked my bra until I felt air on my back. The surprise and a little bit of fear shocked me out of our kiss. I pushed myself up so I was straddling his waist, and I watched a hint of uncertainty skim across his eyes as if he wasn’t sure he should’ve made that move.
I’d never let anyone see this much of me, but I wanted it with Josh. I wanted to press myself to him and feel his heart race even faster. I wanted to see the look in his eyes when he touched me. It scared me how much
closer I wanted to be with him, but it was the good kind of fear… the exhilarating kind.
I pulled down the straps and let the material fall away. Josh gazed hotly at me, all uncertainty gone, and he grasped both my hands.
“Come here,” he whispered.
I bent over him, and my hair draped around us. His kiss was slow and gentle, as were his hands, thrilling me with every touch. We rolled onto our sides, and I trembled as his fingertips traced the length of my spine.
“Are you cold?” he asked, holding me closer to his chest.
I stared into his beautiful eyes. “I’m perfect.”
He smiled and kissed my forehead. The fire crackled quietly behind us but was then overshadowed by the ringing of Josh’s phone. He groaned and reached onto the coffee table to take the call. His brow knitted as he looked at the screen.
“Steph?” he answered.
I looked at the clock on the cable box. Why was she calling so late from New York? I curled up and covered myself with the edge of the blanket.
“You’re home?” he said.
My eyes grew big, and Josh raked his hand through his hair.
“I um… I’m on Martha’s Vineyard. I came for the day with some friends and our ferry was cancelled because of the weather.”
A pause followed, and Josh said, “Yeah, we’re at a hotel.”
I watched as he fidgeted with a book on the coffee table. The number of lies we were telling was multiplying at an astronomical rate.
The conversation continued only another minute. Josh put down the phone and joined me under the blanket, hugging me against him.
“She’s home?” I asked.
“She flew back early because of bad weather in New York tomorrow.”
“And I guess she saw your car was there but you weren’t.”
He twisted one of my long curls around his finger. “I don’t know how much longer we can keep this a secret.”
“I know. I hate lying to Em and Sergei. I’m just dreading Mark’s reaction.”
“After Skate America we’ll have to decide what to do.”
I hooked my arm around him and closed my eyes. The truth had to be told, but I wanted to hang on to our peaceful existence as long as possible. As soon as everyone knew, they were going to hate all over our relationship. Josh and I only had a few months left together, and dealing with constant negativity and people who wanted to split us up wasn’t how I wanted to spend the time.
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