“Yes. Yes, it was.”
She folded her arms over her jacket. “So, are you and Josh going to have a private celebration later like you did last weekend on Martha’s Vineyard?”
My body went numb, while my brain fought to think quickly. It didn’t succeed as all I could utter was, “What?”
“I went to the Vineyard with friends,” Josh said.
“Oh, cut the crap. The only friend you have is Courtney. Or should I say girlfriend?” Stephanie practically spat at me.
“What the hell is she talking about?” Mark asked.
“I don’t know what you think you know…” Josh said with less conviction.
“I’ve seen all the texts and the pictures, including your cute little matching Halloween costumes.”
Oh my God.
Josh’s jaw clenched. “How did you get on my phone? It’s always locked.”
“It wasn’t hard for me to sneak a peek when you were punching in the password once. Then all I had to do was wait until you were in the shower to grab it.”
“You had no right to do that.”
“I had every right when you’ve been lying to my face every day!”
“Court, you’d better start talking right now.” Mark fumed.
I was still too overcome to speak. Stephanie had read our texts. Our private, heartfelt words. Since Josh and I hardly saw each other alone, we’d been relying on our phones to stay connected. To share our feelings. My stomach turned at the thought of Stephanie seeing all of it.
“Your partner’s waiting for an explanation.” Stephanie waved her hand at me. “Go on.”
Anger rose in my throat, tightening and burning. She’d calculated this, waited until we were in the middle of the competition to drop this bomb.
“I’m not going to talk about this here or in front of you,” I said.
Mark took my elbow. “We’re gonna talk about it somewhere.”
“What’s going on?” Em asked as she and Sergei entered our circle of intensity.
“Ask Courtney and Josh,” Stephanie said. “They’re the ones who’ve been sneaking around together and lying to all of us.”
Em glanced from me to Josh and back again, but she didn’t look shocked. With her pursed lips she looked more annoyed.
Sergei stepped forward. “You all need to get changed and get on the bus. We’ll deal with this at the hotel.”
Other skaters and coaches watched us with curious looks as everyone in our group appeared on the verge of exploding. We slowly dispersed, and Josh slid next to me. His eyes were still dark with fury.
“I’m so sorry,” he said.
“It’s not your fault.”
“Court, let’s go.” Em pointed me to the ladies’ locker room.
Josh and I parted, and I blew past Stephanie to get to my bags. The night had started off so promising, and now it was all shot to hell. Mark wanted to strangle me, and who knew what Em and Sergei had to say. I’d never been a violent person, but visions of punching Stephanie’s snotty face played over and over in my mind.
Chapter Seventeen
Em and Sergei were waiting for us in the hotel lobby. None of us had spoken a word on the short ride down Main Street.
“Stephanie, Josh, let’s get a table in the restaurant.” Sergei motioned for them to follow him.
“Our mom is waiting to have dinner with us,” Stephanie said.
“You can let her know you’re having a meeting,” Sergei said tersely.
Stephanie moved a step slower than Josh but dutifully trailed after Sergei. That left Mark and me with Em, and I guessed she and Sergei were tag-teaming us.
“I have to check on the twins,” she said as she unbuttoned her coat. “Can you get a table for us? On the opposite side of the restaurant please.”
Mark and I followed her orders and slid into a booth near the back of the room. The place had a cozy lodge ambiance with its light-colored wood and burning fireplace, but I wasn’t feeling very cozy with Mark glaring at me. I knew my parents would be looking for me, so I texted Mom that I’d see them in the morning. I had no idea how long this was going to take.
“Are you texting him?” Mark asked.
“I’m texting my mom,” I said and tossed the phone into my purse.
He stared at me for a long minute. “What the hell, Court? We’ve been partners half our lives, and you betray that for some guy?”
“I’m not betraying our partnership.”
“You’re dating our biggest competition. You don’t think that’s a problem?”
The waitress came to the table, and Mark told her we needed a few minutes. She seemed happy to leave after spying the intense looks we were giving each other.
“If my dating Josh was a problem, we wouldn’t have gotten our best ever score tonight,” I said.
“That was just one short program. What’s gonna happen at nationals when the Olympic team is on the line? Will you be okay with beating Josh? Crushing his dream? Because that’s what you’ll have to do.”
“We can both make the team. No one has to have their dream crushed.”
I sounded like one of Em’s rah-rah Team Cape Cod speeches.
“And that’s the problem right there.” Mark smacked his hand on the table. “You shouldn’t care what happens to anyone else. You should only be concerned with how you and I are going to get on the team.”
“I’m not saying I’m concerned with both of us making it. I’m just…” I held my head in my hands. “You’re twisting my words.”
“I don’t think I am.”
“What do I have to do to prove I’m still just as focused on our partnership and our goals?” I saw his mouth open for an immediate comeback, and I hastily added, “Besides breaking up with Josh.”
“Why do you want to date him anyway? Isn’t he moving back to California?”
Thanks for the reminder. It wasn’t as if that didn’t weigh on my mind every day.
“We have some things to figure out, but—”
“Is it really worth getting involved with him when it might be over in a few months?”
The knife twisted deeper into my gut, hitting all my biggest fears about our relationship. I slapped open my menu and pretended to read.
“We don’t know what’s going to happen,” I said quietly.
Em marched up to the booth and made me scoot over so she could slide onto my side. “Have you ordered yet?”
“I’m not really hungry.” I shut the menu.
She reopened it. “You have to eat.”
“See, now you’re not taking care of yourself,” Mark said. “And you say this isn’t a problem.”
“I wouldn’t be feeling sick if you weren’t ragging all over me,” I barked.
He leaned forward. “I’m just trying to tell you—”
“Zip it. Both of you.” Em flagged down our waitress. “Can I get a glass of merlot?”
Mark and I both stuck to water, and we all silently examined our menus until the waitress came back to take our orders. After she walked away, Em took a long sip of her wine and slowly set down the glass.
“Court, I wish you would’ve been honest with us,” she said. “I had my suspicions about you and Josh, but I wanted you to come to me.”
“How did you know?”
“Have you forgotten that Sergei and I snuck around for a year? I know all the signs.”
I avoided her gaze as I folded my straw wrapper into tiny squares. “I’m sorry. We didn’t want to keep this from you, but we knew there was going to be backlash from some people.”
“You think?” Mark snapped.
I looked up at him. “If I’d known Stephanie was going to turn this into a circus, I would’ve told you from the beginning.”
“Sergei is talking to Stephanie about how she handled things,” Em said.
Mark snorted. “Did he draw the short straw?”
Em ignored his comment. “I want to make sure this isn’t going to be an issue between you two.
Whatever needs to be said should be said now and then we need to move on.”
“So you’re okay with her dating Josh?” Mark asked.
“I’m going to trust that Court and Josh have entered into this relationship carefully, and they’re prepared to handle competing against each other.” Her big blue eyes focused steely on mine.
I’d been coached by Em and Sergei for so long that I knew all their strategies, all their ways of getting the responses from us they wanted. The purpose of her statement was to make me think long and hard about whether I’d made the right choice. It was also to show Mark she had confidence in my decision, whatever that might be.
“I think tonight Josh and I proved we can handle it,” I said.
“Then as long as you maintain that professionalism, I don’t have an issue with this,” Em said.
Mark let out an angry laugh. “Of course you don’t. You dated Sergei when Chris didn’t want you to, when everyone thought it was a bad idea.”
My eyebrows shot up, and Em shot Mark a dark glare.
“I don’t appreciate the attitude, and that was a very different situation. There were a lot more issues since Sergei was my coach. Those issues don’t apply here.” She turned to me. “I don’t like that you lied to all of us, though. That part I do have a problem with.”
“I really am sorry we didn’t tell you. I realize now it would’ve been better to be up front with everyone.”
“We need to have honesty and trust between all of us in order to work as the best possible team,” Em said.
I nodded and made eye contact with Mark. “I know, and I promise it won’t happen again.”
He tapped his thumb on the table as he mulled over my apology. When he didn’t say anything, I fidgeted in my seat, anxious he was going to tell me he didn’t believe me.
“Mark, do you trust that Court will put your partnership first?” Em prodded him.
He gave me a hard look. “You swear you’re not gonna flake on me?”
“I’ve wanted to be an Olympian since I was ten years old. I’m going to fight for this with everything I have,” I said slowly, making sure he heard the resolve in every word.
“But what if Josh breaks up with you right before nationals?” Mark asked. “What if that’s part of the plan? Stephanie stirs up the first round of trouble here, and then he goes in for the kill when it’s crunch time?”
I groaned and covered my face. “How many times do I have to tell you Josh is nothing like Stephanie? He’s not using me. He’s had a crush on me for eight years!”
“Really? That’s so sweet,” Em said.
“What took him so long to make his move? Jeez,” Mark said.
I looked down at the table. “It’s complicated.”
I wasn’t going to get into Josh’s shyness and our failed first kiss. That wasn’t anyone’s business but ours.
“And getting involved now isn’t complicated? He picked the worst time possible,” Mark said. “I’m telling you, if he does anything questionable, anything to hurt you—”
“He won’t,” I said firmly.
“Josh is a good guy.” Em backed me up.
The waitress set down our plates, and I took a bite of my sandwich. My stomach felt a little more settled than it had when we’d started this conversation. Now to get through the meal peacefully…
“I’m holding you to your word.” Mark picked up a French fry and waved it at me. “And I’m still gonna keep an eye on Josh. And his evil sister.”
“You’re a great partner to look out for Court,” Em said.
Looking out is one thing. Being insanely paranoid is another.
Em steered the conversation toward less volatile topics the rest of dinner, so we were all in a calm mood when we left the restaurant. Then we saw Stephanie, Josh, and their mom standing in the lobby.
I could feel Mark tense beside me. Just seeing Stephanie’s face again stirred up fury in me, too. But no way in hell was I going to confront her with Mrs. Tucker there.
“If I go upstairs, you’re going to play nice, right?” Em said.
Mark crossed his arms and widened his stance. “Of course.”
Em passed them on her way to the elevator, and she stopped and spoke to them for a few minutes. Mrs. Tucker actually cracked a smile, though it looked like the phony one Stephanie often wore.
Mark took a call from Zoe on his cell, leaving me standing alone as he wandered over to the empty sitting area. I shuffled my feet and took out my own phone so I wouldn’t look like an aimless fool. I wanted to talk to Josh, but the idea of approaching him in front of his mom sounded as appealing as diving into an ocean full of sharks.
I glanced up as Em departed, and Mrs. Tucker’s smile had evaporated. She was speaking to Josh while also treating me to more of her icy looks. Every one of them made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. I tried to figure out a way to get to the elevator without going past them, but I’d have to learn how to walk through walls.
Josh turned away from Stephanie and his mom and came toward me, and I froze from the iciest of Mrs. Tucker’s glares. Josh took my hand and intertwined our fingers, but I pulled away.
“Maybe we shouldn’t… here.” I looked over at Mark, and he was observing us just as intently as Mrs. Tucker was.
Josh grasped my hand with both of his. “I’ve waited too long to be with you to watch you from across the room.”
His warmth washed over the coldness I felt from the people staring at us. He stepped even closer and bent his head.
“I’m not happy with how this came out, but I’m happy it’s out,” he said.
“I am, too. I just… I don’t want Mark to get riled up again. And your mom… I assume she knows about us?”
“Yeah, Steph took care of that.” His voice quickly went from soft to hard.
“Shocking,” I said bitterly.
Stephanie and Mrs. Tucker apparently had endured enough of seeing Josh and me together because they disappeared from the lobby. Not before one last haughty glance at me, though.
“What did your mom say?” I asked.
He hesitated and shook his head. “It doesn’t matter.”
“That bad, huh?” I chewed on my lip.
“I don’t care what she thinks.”
“You must care a little. I mean, she’s your mom.”
He looked down at our hands and gently pressed mine between his. “Her way of looking at the world is so narrow and so different from mine that I don’t… I don’t understand her at all. So whatever opinions she has about my life, they don’t hold any weight with me.”
My heart hurt for him. He deserved to have a mother who was just as caring and wonderful as he was. I couldn’t imagine growing up with a mom as cold and judgmental as his. I wanted to give him a hug but not in the middle of all the lobby action.
“Walk with me to my room?” I said.
We got into the elevator, and I wrapped my arms around Josh. As he held me tight, the craziness of the night slipped from my mind, and all that remained was the perfectness of how our bodies fit together. I’d missed that feeling so much in the few days we’d been in Lake Placid.
The elevator chimed, and we walked hand-in-hand to my door. Liza was probably asleep since she had an early practice, so we stayed in the hallway.
“How did things go with Mark?” Josh asked.
“We came to somewhat of an understanding. Em was awesome. She really supported me.”
“Yeah, Sergei was the same. Well, after he lectured me about lying and gave Steph an even longer lecture about manipulating the situation.”
“She deserved a lot more than a lecture.”
Josh pinched the bridge of his nose. “I still can’t believe she looked at my phone.”
“I hate the idea of her reading our texts. It’s like she invaded the most private part of our relationship.” My throat ached, and I swallowed hard. “God, the things we wrote about that night on the Vineyard…”
I squeezed my eye
s shut. We’d texted how we wished we could lie next to each other again, touch each other…
Josh rested his forehead against mine. “I’m so, so sorry. I should’ve been more careful.”
“You didn’t know she’d go to those lengths.”
“I told her the only reason I’m still speaking to her is because we skate together.”
I hugged him again, even longer and tighter. He was saddled with two cold-hearted people in his life. I didn’t know how he put up with Stephanie on a daily basis. Mark might drive me nuts sometimes, but he was a good person. He would never be intentionally hurtful like Stephanie had been.
“Tomorrow is going to be pretty important,” Josh said.
I looked up at him. “We have to do well to prove none of this is affecting us on the ice. Em and Sergei are going to be watching us closely.”
He nodded. “We just have to do exactly what we did tonight.”
And if we do that, hopefully Mark and I will come out on top again.
Even though we’d joked around with the trash talk before, I didn’t want to say that to him. It didn’t feel right after all the drama of the evening. I kept thinking about what Mark had said about crushing Josh’s dream. I had to put that out of my mind or switch the focus to crushing Stephanie’s dream. That was definitely something I had no problem using as motivation.
****
The moment I saw Josh’s face, I knew he hadn’t skated well.
His eyes were filled with disappointment as he and Stephanie came to a stop at the boards after their free skate. I raced onto the ice and tried to push aside my sinking feeling by carving deeper edges. How they skated doesn’t matter, I reminded myself. This is about you and Mark and what you need to do.
Unfortunately, I couldn’t plug my ears to block out Stephanie and Josh’s score, and it confirmed there had been mistakes. Big ones. I shook out my arms to keep the blood flowing and kept my head down as I glided past the kiss and cry.
Don’t look at them. Don’t think about them.
The short filmy skirt of my burgundy dress flapped over my thighs as I picked up the pace. Mark joined me and took my hand, and we made one more lap around the rink before receiving our introduction. We opened our arms to acknowledge the crowd’s cheers and settled into our starting pose. I had to face the kiss and cry as Mark and I stood back to back, and I saw Stephanie gesturing animatedly at the ice. Josh totally ignored her as he quietly watched us.
Crossing the Ice Page 18