by Ronica Black
“Ellie—”
“Please. If you have any feelings for me, you’ll give us a chance.”
“It’s because I have feelings for you that I’m doing this.”
Ellie broke into tears. “Maggie. Maggie.”
“I don’t want you to hurt,” Maggie whispered. “Please don’t hurt because of me.”
“Oh God, Maggie. I will, I do. You have my heart.”
Silence ensued. Ellie could hear her breathing. “I wish I could touch you right now,” Ellie said.
“I wish that too. I wish that more than anything.”
“Then don’t give up.”
“I need to go,” she said with obvious difficulty. “I can’t talk. I need to cry.”
“I love you,” Ellie said. “Maggie, I love you.”
The line clicked and went dead. Ellie hugged herself and rocked.
A knock sounded from the door. “Ms. Ellie?” Bianca said. “Breakfast. You want juice this morning?”
Ellie kept rocking. “I’ll be right out.” She knew what she had to do. She had to put on a brave face, pretend she was okay. She did it all the time. She had to go on. Even if she was dying inside.
She rose, checked her face in the mirror, took a shaky breath, and opened the door. Bianca looked ashen.
“Ms. Ellie, are you okay?”
Ellie smiled. Her best plastic one yet.
“I’m fine. And yes to the juice.” She headed for the kitchen. Her body functioned, her mouth smiled, but her heart, her heart she’d left in the bedroom. Broken and tattered, lying on her floor.
“Ellie, you look wonderful.” Ellie stood and posed, hand on hip. She put on her best smile. The benefit was something she supported, something she was proud of. Project Teen Write was all about at risk teens finding their voice through writing. She loved meeting the kids, and for more than a few, making their dreams come true through publication.
“Ellie, over here.” The benefit was a good thing, and right now she needed good things. Maggie’s good-bye had torn her wide open and forced her to take a hard, serious look at her life. Things needed to change, and she was determined to make sure they did.
“Over here, Ellie.” She turned as the cameras flashed, capturing her from every angle.
“Ellie, right here. Beautiful, nice smile.”
“Ellie, how have you been?” She just kept smiling. “No date tonight?” An image of Maggie stabbed her, and she nearly crumbled. But she recovered quickly, standing taller, smiling brighter.
“Ellie, is it true you went AWOL? Where did you go?” The question stung, but she didn’t show it. She was an actor, and a damn good one.
“That’s all, folks.” Her manager, Marco, smiled, took her elbow, and led her inside. Ellie relaxed a little at being away from the lenses, but she made it a point to pull her arm away as quickly as possible.
“It’s all right to be upset,” he said. “The fucking nerve to ask you that right now.”
She looked at him incredulously. “I’m not upset with the question.” She walked on, ready for a damn drink.
Marco caught up, falling into step next to her. “What, you’re still mad at me? Ellie, I told you, it’s for your own good. She hurt you, see? I saved you from further heartache. I’m only thinking of you, sweetie.”
Ellie stopped and looked him dead in the eyes. “How do you know she hurt me? You did something to my phone didn’t you?” She grinned wickedly, so glad she’d got a new one. “We need to talk, Marco. Not now. But soon. Things are going to change. But right now I want you away from me. Far away.” She entered the hotel’s large ballroom and went straight for the bar.
“Whiskey, the good stuff. Straight up.”
The bartender was nervous; it was obvious in his trembling hands. When he handed the drink over, he apologized.
Ellie shot the whiskey and returned the glass. “Relax,” she said. “We don’t bite.”
“Good to know,” he said, giving her a shy smile.
She motioned for another one, downed it, and left him to head for a group of people she knew well. She embraced her long-time acquaintances and fell into conversation. None of them mentioned the AWOL incident though surely they’d heard. She was grateful, not ready to talk about that with anyone.
The whiskey helped to ease the conversation and settle her nerves. She moved from group to group, giving hugs and thanking everyone for their support. She embraced the teen writers, congratulated them on publication. She was thrilled for the young woman who’d just sold her screenplay. Her life was changed forever, and it touched Ellie deeply.
She took the young woman by the hand and tugged her toward a group of writers she knew. But she stopped dead in her tracks when she heard their conversation.
“I’m telling you she’s here. Years in hiding and now suddenly she’s here,” her friend Clyde Banks said.
“I can’t believe it. Why now?”
Ellie approached, and her heart began to race. “Excuse me, but who are you talking about?”
“Ellie, hello.” Clyde kissed her cheek. The other writers did the same. Most she knew, but a few she hadn’t met. She looked back to Clyde for an answer.
He looked embarrassed. “I didn’t mean to sound—”
Ellie waved him off. “Who?”
He looked past her and nodded. “Well, her. Abigail Forrester.”
Ellie felt her heart flutter. She trembled.
“Are you okay?”
She touched her forehead. “Yes, fine, thank you.” She turned to find Maggie standing alone near the bar, wearing a black tailored pantsuit with a pearl blouse.
“Oh, my God.” Ellie said, too moved to keep it silent.
“Do you know her?” Clyde asked, his gaze following hers.
Ellie braced against him. “Know her,” she said. “I’m in love with her.”
Clyde touched her hand. “Then go to her,” he said. “We’ll keep your young friend company.”
Ellie couldn’t tear her eyes away from Maggie. “Yes,” she said as she moved away.
Taking a deep breath, she crossed the floor quickly and came to stand behind her. Maggie was nursing a glass of red wine.
“You came,” she whispered, so moved with emotion she thought it would all burst out of her at once. She covered her mouth with a trembling hand, trying to control herself.
Maggie stilled. She turned her head to the side. “I couldn’t stay away. Couldn’t say no to you.”
Ellie stepped closer, hooked her pinky finger with Maggie’s. “I see.” She inhaled sharply, Maggie’s scent igniting an inner fire. Desire quickly grew aflame, and she squeezed her finger. “I’m glad you’re here.”
Maggie’s breath hitched as Ellie pressed closer.
“I’m nervous,” Maggie breathed.
“I know,” Ellie said. “I know how hard this is for you.” Deftly, she ran her fingertips down the center of Maggie’s hand.
“Ellie,” she sighed, moved by the sensation.
“What?”
“You better get away from me before—”
“Before what?”
“Before I lose control and take you in my arms.”
Ellie linked their hands. “I don’t want to go away from you. I want to stay right here.”
“People will see.”
“I don’t care.”
Ellie tugged on her and they stood face-to-face. Ellie took her other hand and squeezed. “It’s so good to see you, feel you.”
Maggie smiled. “It’s damn near heart stopping.”
They looked at one another for a long, languid moment. Ellie reached up and touched her full lips, brushed her cheek with the backs of her fingers.
“You look so beautiful.”
Maggie trembled, catching her hand in her own and kissing it.
“Not near as beautiful as you in that dress.”
Ellie blushed, loving the way Maggie made her feel. When her eyes were on her she felt like the most wanted woman in the world.
“Ellie, Ellie, what the hell are you doing?”
Ellie turned, startled, only to find Marco racing up to her, his face contorted in anger. “People are asking for you,” he said, refusing to look at Maggie. “And you’re over here having a fucking gay pride parade.”
Ellie flinched as if he’d smacked her. “What the hell—” she started, but Maggie nudged him away, coming to stand between them.
Marco tried to look around her, but Maggie wouldn’t let him.
He looked nervous, angry, like a caged animal. “Ellie, don’t do this to me,” she heard him say. “Get her out of here.”
Ellie eased Maggie aside. “You’re the one I’m getting rid of, Marco. You’re fired.” She clenched her jaw along with her fists.
The shock of her words hit him. “You can’t do that. Ellie, we’ve got years. You were just a snot nosed little teenager when I met you. I made you. You can’t do this.”
“I can and did. Now get the fuck out of here.” She had hoped to do this privately, but right at that moment, she didn’t give a damn if the whole world saw.
He stumbled backward. “You can’t do this, Ellie! You can’t do this!”
Ellie waved over security, who were watching the exchange closely. “Escort him out and make sure he doesn’t reenter.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Maggie took her hand and gave a gentle squeeze. “Are you sure about firing him?”
“I’ve never been more sure.”
“He can’t hurt you can he?”
Ellie laughed. “I had a little talk with my new lawyer this morning.”
“New lawyer too?”
“Yes.” Ellie turned to face her. “I cleaned house. A few others are gone as well.” She gripped Maggie’s hand. “Now kiss me before I faint with sheer desire.”
Maggie searched her eyes, and Ellie could see her pulse quicken near the base of her neck.
“It’s okay,” Ellie said, meaning it.
“You’re sure?”
“Yes. Are you?”
Maggie touched her face. “No fear, right?”
Ellie smiled, and she felt it light up her entire being. “No fear.”
Maggie leaned in and kissed her, and Ellie felt the heat from it shoot up and down her spine, then ricochet out into her body. She whimpered in surrender, powerless to move, to think, to rationalize. All she could do was feel. And it was wonderful.
And as they finally pulled apart, Ellie heard something strange. She turned in bewilderment to find her guests clapping. They were smiling, waving, and applauding.
Maggie flushed and cleared her throat. “I think the cat’s out of the bag.”
“I think so.” Ellie wrapped her arms around her, and Maggie returned the embrace.
“What changed your mind?” Ellie asked, looking up at her.
“Some old letters from my mother.”
“Really?” She recalled the ones she’d seen in her dresser drawer. The ones tied with red ribbon.
“She wrote to me a lot after Stacy left. She told me I had to keep trusting, to keep trying. To give people a chance.”
“And you didn’t listen,” Ellie said.
“No, I didn’t. I was too afraid. But in her last letter, before she died, she said that love would find me again, but I had to be brave enough to let it in.”
Ellie smiled up at her. “Are you, Maggie? Are you brave enough?”
Maggie drew her closer. “For you, I am.” She thumbed her lower lip. “I’m in love with you, Ellie.”
A warmth overcame her, and Ellie felt like she could float away. “Abigail Forrester, will you stay with me tonight?”
Maggie didn’t hesitate. “Yes.”
Ellie laughed. “Ever done it in the back of a limo?”
“I can’t say I have.”
“So much awaits you, Maggie Douglas.” She took her hand and tugged. “Come on. There are people who are dying to meet you.”
“There are?”
“Oh, yes. You’re the talk of the night.”
“I bet I am.” Maggie fell into step next to her. “I bet we are.”
“Let them talk, let them drool, let them faint dead away. I have you, and that’s all that matters.”
Chapter Seventeen
The snowmobile raced along the trail back to the house. Maggie peeled off her goggles and lowered her neck gaiter. She wanted to feel the icy wind on her face. She’d just finished packing the trail again after a fresh snow, and her body ached with spent energy. A nice hot shower sounded wonderful, but that wasn’t what she was looking forward to the most.
Tonight, Ellie came, and Maggie could hardly wait. She hadn’t seen her in three weeks, and video chatting just wasn’t the same as holding her and touching her. Talking on the phone late into the night was hurting them both. Ellie was tired on set and often had six a.m. calls. And Maggie could hardly keep her eyes open long enough to write a sentence, much less her daily word goal.
And now that she’d made a public appearance, her popularity was soaring, and her agent was already bugging her about doing a book tour for the new release. But she was trying to take it slow. One day at a time. She liked to get her feet used to the water before she dove in headfirst. Her agent, though, didn’t seem to like that analogy.
And then there were the rumors about her relationship with Ellie Falcon. Hollywood was all abuzz, and Ellie was being swarmed by paparazzi everywhere she went. She’d released a public statement about how she’d started to date, but she’d left the lesbian rumors alone, out of respect for Maggie. She’d said she wanted to do it the right way and not in the heat of out-of-control rumors. It would only fuel the fire.
Maggie was okay with whatever she chose to do. She knew that their relationship wouldn’t remain private for very long. But she planned on making the most of it while it lasted.
She slowed as she neared the house. Lincoln popped up in the window of the mudroom, tail wagging. Maggie killed the engine and pulled the tarp over the machine, then crunched on the snow as she headed up the stairs for the door. But just before her hand reached the doorknob, she heard a sound she thought she’d never hear again. It was the quick thumping of helicopter blades.
She turned and shaded her eyes as the black chopper came into view, hovered about one hundred yards away, and kissed the snow in a careful landing. She grinned as the door opened and a petite figure with raven black hair descended. Maggie threw down her goggles and gloves and raced back down the stairs and into the snow. Ellie waved and smiled, headed for her carrying two bags.
Maggie scooped her up into her arms the second she reached her. “Mmm, I wasn’t expecting this,” Maggie said, kissing her neck, her cheek, and then her mouth.
Ellie fell limp against her. “I couldn’t wait until tonight.”
“I’m glad you didn’t.” Maggie set her down and lifted the bags. Beyond them, the chopper lifted off the ground and up into the sky. They watched it disappear into the sun.
“Leave the bags,” Ellie said.
Maggie stopped. “What?”
Ellie turned and gave her a sly grin. “Leave the bags. I want to be the only thing you’re holding.”
Maggie smiled and let them fall into the snow. She lifted Ellie off the ground again in an embrace and then they both hurried to the stairs.
“It’s been three weeks,” Ellie breathed as Maggie opened the door.
“I know.”
Ellie entered, pulling on Maggie as she knelt quickly in the mudroom, removing both their shoes. “Too long,” she said.
“Yes.”
They entered the living room, and Ellie stood before the couch. “Build a fire,” she said.
Maggie saw the desire brushing her high cheekbones. She could feel it in the way her breath had quickened and hear it in the way her voice had lowered. She didn’t try to object or suggest the bedroom. She knew what they both needed, and it needed to happen now.
Maggie headed for the fireplace where she tossed in th
ree dry logs and lit some kindling. She stoked it for several minutes, making sure it was burning bright and strong. When she turned, her breath caught in her throat.
Ellie was nude, standing by the couch, waiting. She held out a hand. “Come here.”
Maggie walked to her, unable to tear her eyes away from her beautiful body.
Ellie took her hand and tugged her close. “Lift your arms,” she said.
Maggie did. Ellie began undressing her, never releasing their gaze. When she’d removed her shirt and bra, she unfastened her ski pants and lowered to tug off the remaining layers. She still kept their gaze as she removed her panties and grazed her fingertips up the sides of her legs as she once again came to a stand.
“Sit,” she said, placing her hand in the center of Maggie’s chest.
Maggie fell onto the couch, and she reached for her, desperate to feel her soft skin.
“No, no touching.” Ellie pinned her wrists to her sides as she straddled her.
“Ellie,” Maggie breathed.
“No, you have to wait.” She kissed her lightly on the jaw, licked her neck, and then teased her lips, gently tugging on them with her teeth. “Will you be good?”
Maggie’s eyes drifted closed as her body awakened and craved. “I don’t know.”
Ellie writhed against her, this time biting her neck and running her tongue along her ear. “I need you to be good,” she said to her. “Keep your hands by your side.”
“What if I can’t?” Maggie shuddered as her body electrified from head to toe.
“Then you’ll be punished.”
“Mmm, and what would my punishment be?”
“You won’t be able to touch me at all for a whole day.”
Maggie groaned.
“See? So be a good girl and keep your hands right here.”
Maggie clenched her fists in frustration. “Okay.”
Ellie released her wrists. “Good.” She shifted and straddled her bare thigh, lowering her warm, moist center onto her. She inhaled sharply, and when she opened her eyes and focused on Maggie, Maggie swore her pupils had dilated.
“Now watch me.” She gripped Maggie’s shoulders and arched, rubbing herself against her leg. “Mmm,” she said. “You feel so good.”