by Autumn Reed
I nodded. Jess said something similar in Vegas, and I knew what they both meant. My biggest challenges in Coleville were combatting boredom and loneliness. Thanks to Jess, I hadn’t grown up completely anti-social, but it was still a massive adjustment to go from my remote lifestyle to Santa Cruz and all the things that came along with it.
Once we reached the lake, we took a break from our serious discussion and set up lunch on a blanket Dad was carrying in his backpack. Over sandwiches and fruit, I told him about working at Percolate and living in Portland.
“The worst part is the almost non-existent night sky,” I glumly explained. “Even when it’s not overcast, there’s too much light pollution to see anything. At least in Santa Cruz, I could still make out constellations easily.”
“You’ll never be a big city girl,” he agreed. “Why did you leave Santa Cruz, anyway?” His voice rising, he continued before I had a chance to respond. “Your, uh, friends better not have—”
“No!” I exclaimed, interrupting his almost-rant. “It was nothing like that.”
“Okay,” he said, blowing out a relieved breath. “Why, then?”
Staring at the trees reflected in the glassy surface of the lake, I attempted to push past the emotions that crept up every time I thought of the guys and my decision to leave. Dad definitely didn’t need to know about Ethan or my dating dilemma, which left one reason—Gerald Douglas.
“Douglas discovered my identity,” I finally said, surprised at my own reluctance. Now that I had to speak the words aloud, I found that I didn’t want to tell him.
“Damn it!” He stood and started pacing. “How did he figure it out?”
I repeated what Douglas said about recognizing me from the artist rendering and photos of Mom, before explaining his threats if I didn’t comply with his demands.
“And he told you that all he wanted was to hear from me?”
“Yes. He claimed he had no intention of harming either of us, but that wasn’t exactly reassuring once he threatened to expose my identity. I felt like leaving was my only choice. Then, if he went through with it, at least I would be away and living under a new name. But, as far as I can tell, he never did.”
“Thank god I left that extra ID in the safe deposit box. Have you told anyone else about all of this?”
“Jess, but only in vague terms over Skype. She doesn’t know where I’m living and never even knew I was in Santa Cruz.”
“Okay, good. So Douglas is why you insisted on meeting me?”
“No. Well, yes, but it’s not the only reason.” I took a few deep breaths, knowing he was not going to be pleased about what I said next. “I think that Vincent DuBois knows you’re alive, and I’ve been looking into him.”
“You’ve been what?” he yelled. “What were you thinking? This is why I didn’t want you to know he even existed. You need to stay away from anything having to do with him.”
“Calm down, Dad. I am staying away from him, but I’ve been going through old case files from when you were with the force.”
“How in the world did you get your hands on . . .” He stopped, understanding dawning on his face. “Zenith.”
“Yes. And, since I’m fairly certain you’ve been doing your own investigation, I thought I should pass on something I found.”
Noticing that he didn’t deny my statement, I pulled a folder from my bag and handed it to him, then described the connections I found between Danny Franco and Vincent DuBois and told him about DuBois’s men showing up at his old office in Coleville. Dad skimmed through the documents I’d printed before turning back to me.
“I vaguely remember Franco’s case, and it seemed like the few leads we had at the time were a dead end. We never even considered that he might be involved with DuBois.” He smiled. “This is incredible, Haley.”
“Do you think the number is a bank account? Phone number?”
“Possibly. I’ll look into it. And, I’m going to track down Franco’s girlfriend as soon as possible. It’s doubtful she’ll be able to identify DuBois as the mysterious visitor after all these years, but it’s worth a try.”
“Here are the rest of the files I have on your old cases,” I said, giving him a thumb drive. Jackson would probably kill me if he ever found out I’d handed them over, but it wasn’t like I’d copied any confidential Zenith files. They were just files that Zenith—probably Chase—had stolen from the LAPD.
“Thank you.” He gave me a stern look. “Now do you promise to stay away from all things Vincent DuBois?” When I didn’t immediately respond, he said, “I mean it. I don’t want you involved.”
“Let me come with you and help with your investigation,” I said boldly.
“Absolutely not.”
“Why not? Wouldn’t we be safer together?” That was a darn good point, if I said so myself.
“No. You just admitted that DuBois knows I’m alive and is looking for me. Me, not you. And, we’re going to make sure it stays that way.”
I sighed, knowing he wouldn’t change his mind. “And, you’re not going to tell me where you’ve been or where you’re living now?”
He shook his head. “No.”
“Then, I want a way to contact you,” I said with conviction, expecting another refusal.
“Okay.”
“And, don’t think you’ll get away with only texting me every—” I paused, suddenly realized he’d agreed. “Oh.”
“I knew something must have happened when you demanded to see me, so I came prepared.” He reached into his bag, then handed me a basic cell phone. “My number is already programmed, and I’ll warn you before changing numbers again. Go ahead and toss the one I left in the safe deposit box.”
“Thank you.” I ran my fingers over the smooth surface of the phone, relief and sadness washing over me. It was getting late in the day, and I knew we would have to hike back and go our separate ways soon. “When will I see you again?” I asked, unable to look at my dad for fear of crying.
“I don’t know, kiddo, I don’t know.”
We quietly gathered our things and returned to the trail, the air between us thick with melancholy. And, as we reached the end of our time together, I wasn’t sure what to say. I never imagined I would go so long without seeing my dad and the thought of saying goodbye now was unbearable.
“So, are you going to tell me what’s going on with you and those boys?” He said it teasingly, like he was attempting to lighten the mood, but I could tell he wanted to hear my answer.
“They were friends, really great friends. But, it doesn’t matter anymore. I can’t go back.”
“Don’t rule it out, Haley. You deserve as much happiness as you can find, and I’m sure they could help you deal with Douglas. I’ll even contact him, if it comes to that.”
“I’ll think about it,” I lied, wishing it could be that simple.
“Good,” he said, wrapping me in one more hug. “I love you,” he whispered, before walking away and disappearing in the woods.
Chapter 22: Theo
Saturday, July 18th
I lifted my bike onto the rack on the Subaru, fatigue seeping in after a morning of mountain biking with Jackson. The adrenaline rush was a healthy outlet for my pent up energy and anxiety, especially when compared to some of my old habits. The past few months had definitely tested my limits, but Haley’s little vanishing act earlier this week resulted in a flip out of epic proportions.
I wasn’t the only one concerned by the deviation from her fairly set schedule, and the five of us agreed to send Liam up there to investigate her disappearance in person. Afraid Haley decided to run again, or worse, my relief was palpable when Liam soon assured us she had returned to Portland and resumed her regular activities. I still wondered where she went, and my imagination ran wild with the possibilities.
Noah’s smug face often came to mind, making me even more determined to bring Haley home. I had always known that she was special—beautiful, genuine, smart, sweet, funny—and it wou
ldn’t take long for someone to scoop her up if she showed a bit of interest. There was nothing I wanted more than for Haley to be happy, but with us, not in dreary Portland with that twit Noah. Unfortunately, Douglas and the issue of the “one of Haley, five of us” situation still stood in the way.
Thanks to my recent outing to the bar with Knox, I had an idea for the latter, though it was rather extreme and I was nervous to even voice it out loud. But I had given it a lot of thought, and Haley’s latest disappearance convinced me to mention it to Jackson. Normally, I would have run something like this by Knox first, but I thought Knox might be more receptive to the idea if it came from Jackson. If Jackson doesn’t think I’ve completely lost my mind, I thought, knowing I was about to suggest either the best idea ever or the worst.
I met Jackson in his backyard, taking a seat at the outdoor table as Penny approached me.
“Hey, girl. You want some sugar?” I asked, rubbing Penny behind the ears. She panted happily until I stopped, then sat at my feet while Jackson took a seat across from me.
“Knox tells me your internship is going well,” Jackson said as he dug into his lunch.
“Yeah, I’m optimistic,” I responded, opening my box of takeout. “Douglas and Jim are constantly meeting with donors right now, so I don’t think it will be too long before we have the evidence we need.”
“Excellent. I’m guessing that’s not what you wanted to talk to me about, then.”
I shook my head, wondering where to start.
“Theo?” Jackson prodded.
I inhaled and forced myself to speak slowly instead of blurting out my idea. “So, you know how we’ve been discussing what to do about Haley after we get her back?”
“Yeah,” he said almost glumly.
“Well, I have another idea I want to propose, but it’s . . . it’s what you might call unorthodox,” I finished anxiously, my palms sweating. I knew a big part of my motivation for this unconventional arrangement was selfish, but it seemed better than Liam’s idea of “may the best man win.” I could easily imagine Haley choosing Liam, Chase, Knox, or Jackson, and I secretly feared that she wouldn’t choose me.
“Okay,” he said, perking up slightly.
“I haven’t told any of the others, even Knox, because I wanted to run it by you first.” Jackson nodded, which encouraged me to continue. “I don’t know about you, but I’m not thrilled with any of the current options. I think I have a solution where everyone wins—Haley wouldn’t have to choose, and none of us would be put through the pain of losing her to another member of the group or risk fracturing the team further.”
“This sounds almost too good to be true,” he said wryly. “So what’s the idea?”
I took a deep breath. “Did I ever mention Jason and his relationship?” Jackson shook his head. “He’s a friend of a friend and is in a committed relationship with several people. I can’t remember the details of whether it’s Jason and another man and woman or him and two women, but they’re a unit, all equally invested in the relationship.”
Jackson didn’t immediately respond, and I tried to gauge his reaction, but his face remained unreadable. If he was surprised by the underlying suggestion, I couldn’t tell.
“Do you really think you could share Haley with four other guys?”
“I know it would take some adjustment, and I’m not exactly sure how it would all work, but I think it’s something to consider. I want what’s best for all of us.”
“You didn’t answer my question, though,” he said, and I could tell he was hiding a smirk. “Perhaps you’ve been spending too much time in a politician’s office.”
“Very funny,” I said sarcastically, before adopting a more serious tone. “It would be difficult, but I wouldn’t have mentioned it if I wasn’t willing to try.”
“And Haley . . . how do you think she would handle this type of situation?”
“Honestly,” I sighed, “I don’t know. But clearly she cares about all of us, and I know she would struggle with choosing. I’d like to think that given this option, she’d realize that everyone wins. Assuming the others agree, of course.”
Jackson nodded, his expression pensive. “You’ve certainly given me something to think about,” he said with no trace of mockery. “Let’s keep this between the two of us for now as we consider it some more.”
I felt myself relax. While Jackson’s response wasn’t overly positive, he hadn’t outright rejected the proposition either; maybe there was hope for my off-the-wall idea yet. Did I want to share Haley with anyone else? Not particularly. Was I willing to if I could have a chance with her and it would make her happy? Abso-frickin-lutely.
Chapter 23: Chase
Friday, July 24th
After work, I drove over to Liam’s penthouse, dreading this latest get-together; I honestly just wanted to head back to the loft and blow off some steam in the gym. Although the loft was a little farther from campus than my apartment had been, living with Knox and Theo was working out even better than I anticipated. I was almost thankful that my plan to share an apartment with Ethan fell through—almost.
As I rode the elevator to the twentieth floor, I wondered if we were finally going to debate the Haley situation now that real progress was being made on the Douglas front. I still wasn’t hot on the idea of us all dating Haley and letting her choose but had yet to come up with something better. I had even secretly wondered if she was better off without us, but every time it was my turn to monitor the remote surveillance, I could see how unhappy she was.
After everyone arrived, Jackson addressed the group. “There’s another option that we haven’t discussed. But, I need you all to promise to think about it rationally and not overreact.” He slowly made eye contact with each of us, waiting for nods of agreement.
“This should be good,” Liam said with a smirk. At least Liam seemed to be in a decent mood for the first time in months, his churlish, moody attitude no longer dominant.
Jackson took a deep breath and his shoulders tensed, like he was preparing for a fight. “We’ve talked about Haley dating all of us and then choosing who she wants to be with, but what if she didn’t have to choose?”
I repeated Jackson’s words in my head a few times, trying to make sense of them. Surely he isn’t saying what I think he’s saying, I thought with horror. Glancing at the other guys, I found an array of reactions. Liam’s smirk had widened, Theo’s expression was blank, and Knox appeared deep in thought.
When no one spoke, I cautiously asked, “What exactly do you mean?”
“I mean that the endgame would be for us to all be in a relationship with Haley,” Jackson replied. I didn’t even attempt to hide my shock as he confirmed my fears. My heart felt like it would beat right out of my chest as I tried to wrap my mind around his preposterous suggestion.
“Well, that’s certainly unconventional,” Liam said lightly. “Not that we’ve ever been conventional. No reason to start now.”
“Are you insane?” I shouted at him. “Unconventional? It’s ridiculous. What would people think? And how would it even work? We all take turns and schedule boyfriend time with Haley on our team calendar? That’s crazy!”
“We would shorten it to BT, of course,” Liam retorted.
“Is it, though?” Jackson asked me calmly, ignoring Liam. “We’re all busy and there are times when at least several of us are out of town on lengthy assignments. Think about the UCLA mission. You and Theo were gone for months, and instead of being alone, Haley still had Knox, Liam, and me,” he said, intentionally leaving Ethan off that list, I was sure. “And, the travel will likely only increase once the whole team is out of school.”
Okay, his point was valid, but that didn’t override the absurdity of this conversation. For being such a rational guy, Jackson was seriously off the rails this time.
“I think it’s brilliant. All the benefits of having a girlfriend without the pressure of being the perfect boyfriend,” Liam said with a wink.
&nb
sp; “Says the rich playboy,” I grumbled not quite under my breath.
“Judgmental prude,” he quipped.
“Can we please stay on topic?” Jackson interrupted.
“Seriously,” Liam said, “I’d much rather share Haley with you prats than not have her at all. I dare you to disagree, Chase.”
I shook my head, too overwhelmed to say anything else. Liam made it sound like one girl with five guys was no big deal. Was he really that deluded?
“You honestly think we could share her?” Knox said to Jackson, finally breaking his silence.
“Do I think five normal guys could handle it? No. But, as Liam pointed out, we’re not normal . . . never have been and never will be.” Jackson stood and paced a few steps before turning back to us. “Look, I know it seems a little outrageous, but you also know I’ll always support what is best for the team. And, as unusual as this arrangement would be, I can see us making it work. If we all agree,” he said, glancing my direction.
What the hell? Surely, I couldn’t be the only one who thought this plan was ludicrous. I looked to Knox, certain he must be against it, but he appeared calm and merely contemplative.
“I can’t believe you guys are actually considering this,” I spit out, growing increasingly agitated that it seemed like they all thought I was the crazy one. “Are you thinking this through? It’s not like we’d just be taking turns with her time, we’d eventually be taking turns with her, um,” I stumbled, “physically.” My face heated and I inwardly groaned. Leave it to the virgin to get flustered talking about sex.
“And, assuming Haley’s okay with it, that’s a problem why?” Liam said around a smug grin.
“It’s unnatural!” I cried. “I have a hard time believing you care about Haley if you can be so blasé about her with other men.”
Liam’s relaxed stance stiffened and he glared at me. “You don’t know anything about my feelings for Haley, so cut the sanctimonious attitude. And, we’re not discussing Haley being with other men. We’re discussing her with the four men I trust most in the world. The four men who would do anything for her, be anything for her. The four men whose happiness I would put before my own, if it came to that.”