by Vera Quinn
“Let’s get this talk done.” I don’t want to do this, but it looks like it is happening none the less.
“How did you know?” Con asks me.
“Lil’s eyes tell the story of her heart and I don’t know what is wrong, I just know Lil is hurting and I wanted her to know we love her.” Yes, I have come to love these people. Lil is like the ma I wished I had growing up. The ma I would want for my sisters. She has a big heart full of love to give and I wish it was us she had given it to because she has plenty to share with everyone. I want to take that pain out of her eyes and replace it with the happiness she shares with everyone every day.
“Thank you, she needed to see someone cared and I wish I could be there for her. We’ve always had a close bond, but this is something that Cap and Lil, are going to need to work on alone. It’s no one’s place to interfere, it’s not that I don’t care, but just like you are mine, Lil is Cap’s and they will get through it. Now let’s get our shit squared away because this place will be running over by night time.” Con looks around and then straight at Katie.
“Am I in the same room?” Con ask her.
“Yes, and everything is cleaned already. We are going to start on dinner soon, so if when you are finished talking, would you like to help, Faith? It looks like Lil may be gone a while and I need to let Shine know what I found out at my doctor appointment today.” Katie has a happy look, no, an elated look in her eyes. She is going to share good news with Shine and it is about time someone has some good news.
“I will be out,” that’s as far as I get.
“Katie, this may take a while but expect to hear smacks on her ass.” Katie bursts out laughing and then she looks at me sheepishly.
“I’m sorry Faith, but I can’t wait for Shine to get to rub it in Con’s face that you are carrying Con’s balls around in your purse. It’s all I heard for the first six months we were married. In fact, I still hear it from time to time.” I smile at Katie, but she has the wrong idea, and I start to correct her but Con once again shows what an ass he can be.
“No one owns my balls but me Katie, but I will be sure and let Shine know you are thinking about the welfare of my balls.” That stops Katie from smiling. Shine walks up behind Katie and puts his arms around her growing belly bump.
“Don’t worry Katie Bug, I know the only man’s balls you are worried about are mine. That’s why it is my name that I hear you moaning when I am cock deep inside of you.” Katie turns three shades of red, but she turns and takes Shine into a hug and then gives him a lingering kiss that Shine fully takes advantage of.
“You two get a room, I don’t want to see you suck face with my new sister-in-law.” Con laughs as he says it. He has a real love for these two and this is the side of him I like to see, when he lets his guard down and shows his emotions. “Come on Faith.” Con takes my hand in his and leads the way. I don’t say a word. I am too shocked by this small sign of Con being nice to me. I am staring at our hands entwined and I like the feeling it gives me. I am getting dizzy from Con’s change in moods. I never know where I stand with this man.
Chapter Fourteen
Con
I open my door or what they call a door here. I know everyone is going to hear my conversation but that is my intent. I need to let Faith how I feel about her the best I can. It’s going to be hard to do since I don’t know myself. I have a plan in the back of my head and I know I need to take it to the table first or at least to Shine but this is the perfect time to put it in motion. I wait for Faith to follow me through the door and then I shut it and lock the flimsy latch. It’s not like it would keep anyone out that wanted in but it may slow them down. I shake my head at the thought.
“I left my backpack in the storage of your bike. You want me to go get it now.” I know Faith is dragging her feet and trying delay this talk but I can’t let her do it.
“I will get it later and either bring it to you or have a prospect bring it. Sit so we can talk. I do not want to intimidate you, Faith. No matter how I try to deny it to myself, you are an adult. In less than six months you will be eighteen and when I was that age I had already joined the Demented Revengers MC. The thing is, you are living a life between adulthood and still being a teenager that needs to be taken care of. I was furious when I found out you were missing. Do you not realize all the things that could have gone wrong with your plan? You could have just as easily been killed as finding Cooper.” I let that soak in a little and I see that she can’t deny part of what I am saying but she does not get it all. “You worried Charity so much that she was not taking care of herself properly. You know that your sister will do anything to help you. She has proven that, and she worries about you like you are her child. You need to take this into consideration before you act. Charity’s main priority should be that baby and herself.” I see that she has been thinking about this and it is a cheap shot, but I need to drive this into her head, so she does not do this again. We are close to ending all of this.
“I never meant to worry Charity, but I should have known it would. I will try to think things through better before I act. The thing is that the hours I was spending alone when I was here before, I was thinking, and I started remembering tidbits of conversations when I was growing up. Things that made no difference to me at the time, but as I was remembering, I started piecing together little memories. I thought if I went out on my own whoever had been watching Charity and me would follow me and they did, or some did. I just got a feeling that the same eyes were on me when I traveled to Saltillo. I knew some of the community and the Hell Keeperz MC knew I had left because they followed me, and I would catch glimpses of them when I was out in public, but I avoided them, and they weren’t very good at going undetected. I traveled at night, but I knew someone was always close watching me, when I would come out of hiding right before dark. I slept in a silo, an abandoned barn, and back streets. Never the same place two nights in a row and I know if he wanted me dead, whoever it was, could have done it when I was sleeping,” Faith shivers and I go over to the bed and sit beside her and pull her in my arms and give her comfort like she had done for Lil just a little while ago. At first Faith is stiff and holding herself back but I am having none of it, I pull her in tight and hug her close and she soon relaxes and then she looks up to me and I want to kiss those lips so bad. My eyes are drawn to them and then Faith licks her lips and there is no way I can resist the temptation any longer. I don’t know what came over me, but I can’t say that I could have fought it if I tried. This woman had a hold on me that I was tired of resisting. Just one kiss, that’s all I need, and it is what I will have. I wanted it to be gentle as I tasted her lips, but I am not gentle and once our lips were melded together it felt like coming home with a jolt of excitement. When Faith opens her mouth for me I am a ravenous man with a hunger for more. I have Faith in my arms and my body is lit for more, but I know I need to pull back. I can’t let this go any further, but Faith’s mixture of passion and innocence has me as hard as a rock. The taste of her mouth has me wondering how the rest of her would taste and that thought is what brought me to my senses. I push Faith back and jump up and start pacing the room. I look back at Faith and she is breathing heavily and touching her lips with the tips of her fingers. She is pulling herself together and I know I should leave this room and stay away for a while, but we need to have a talk and it is going to happen. “Why do you care about what happens to me? I am not your responsibility.” It is on the tip of my tongue to tell Faith she is wrong, but I don’t know how this woman would react to the truth, so I stick with the story I was told to give her. I just hope this doesn’t come back and bite me in the ass. Sleeping in the same bed with Faith every night is going to be more of a challenge than I thought.
“I care because I care. There is an attraction between us and I am just waiting for you to turn eighteen before I act on it any further, I am trying to be a decent man about it, but you are making it damn hard.” At least on that I can be honest and after t
hat kiss, I can’t even deny it from myself. “You went with your gut and I can say that is normally what will keep you alive, but you need to start having more self-preservation thoughts. Charity would have been devastated if this had not turned out the way it has. I don’t think you purposely worried your sister, I just think you need to use a little more common sense. Think about the risk and share what you are thinking with someone as a sounding board. That easy. I even bounce stuff off Shine or Cap sometimes.” I need to get through to this woman, but I haven’t convinced her yet, but she is thinking about it.
“Alright, I get it. I can’t promise I will do it every time. but I can say that I will think things through more thoroughly. I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but after everything that has happened to Charity and me how can you judge me for not trusting people?” She’s got me there, but I try again.
“Have I ever done one thing to you that has harmed you? Have I ever been anything but honest with you that you know about?” That gets me an eyebrow raise and I feel like shit for it, but in a way, it is true.
“I don’t like the way you said that I know of because sometimes, it is what we don’t know that harms us. Look at everything I have found out today, but my answer is no you haven’t. You have given me everything straight even if you could have been more tactful about it.” Faith says looking at her nails. She’s nervous and she won’t look me in the eye.
“I’ll leave that last part alone, but you can count on me. Come to me, which is why I am claiming you in a way. I am claiming you and it is a done deal so accept and we can move on.” That gets Faith off the bed and in front of me.
“No one owns me. I won’t be a doll you put on the shelf and when you say so, then I can get off the shelf for a while, and if you don’t feel it at the time, then I just sit on that damn shelf. I am my own person. I make my decisions and I do not share. That is one thing that enrages me. In the community men chose their women but the women had no say in it at all. Not me, not ever.” Faith says, and I can feel her anger rolling off her body. I could put that anger to a more pleasurable use. I shake my head to bring my attention back to this talk and off Faith’s delectable body. Damn! I need to get my head into this talk and then Faith stomps her foot and I see the innocence in Faith’s eyes and it brings me out of this arousing state. I grab Faith by the arm and bring her to me.
“Do not throw a damn hissy fit like a child.” I have her attention now, but I push her back gently. I don’t want to scare her, just get her attention, and I need some distance between our bodies. “That is not what this is about. Being claimed is an honor in my world. It means not only will I protect you with my life but so will every brother that is in Demented Revengers MC, and that is every chapter. They will not only protect you, but Charity, her child, and Brody. Do you not want your family to be safe?” I know I am walking a thin line here of losing Faith all together, but I need to get her to agree with this and do it without bitching. I also have other plans, but I need to get with Shine on that one before I spring it on Faith. One thing at a time.
“Isn’t Brody and his family already protected through Rebel? I thought they were good friends or something.” Faith looks confused.
“Brody has helped the Demented Revengers MC a few times, and he is Rebel’s friend, but that friendship can only go so far.” I know this is going to work when Faith looks at me with eyes that tell me she is looking for that one person that is hers. I know she loves her sister, but she wants someone that she can always depend on. One that will let her spread her wings and not smother her. I just wish I wasn’t giving her half-truths. I didn’t ever think I would want to be anyone’s person. I sound like a damn pussy to myself. What the hell is this woman doing to me? “If you are my ol’ lady then my relationship with you will give Charity and her family protection that they need right now. Instead of waiting for Brody to ask for help, then we will put men on his house twenty-four seven. That will leave Brody able to help the club and someone always protecting Charity. Do you not want that for your sister? I won’t be touching you in any sexual way until you are eighteen and even then, only if that is what you want. I’m not a damn rapist or anything. When I am with a woman, we both enjoy the pleasure we can give each other.” That part is the truth.
“Would you be giving this pleasure to another woman when you are waiting on me to turn eighteen? Or would you be committed to this claiming, because I will only agree to it if you are in this with me. I repeat, I will not share. I’m not some biker babe that will look the other way.” That makes me laugh.
“Faith, no one would ever mistake you as a biker babe.” I stop laughing when I see the hurt it put in those beautiful eyes. “Not in a bad way, babe. You are sweet and innocent, but you have this sexy edge that draws men to you. My claim on you will stop any damn biker from getting any ideas. Another way being my ol’ lady protects you.” I don’t want to give Faith false hopes and dreams. I don’t know if I can keep it in my pants while Faith is in my bed. I won’t touch her that way, but I am going to need a release after using restraint with Faith. I can’t think of that now.
“What is expected of me if I take your claim and why are you willing to do this?” Faith asks in a soft voice.
“Your loyalty to the club and me must be unquestionable. We will protect you and ask only loyalty in return, so we expect it every time. No questions asked but I can’t share club business and the only exception will be on a need to know if it pertains to you. We are all a family so pitch in and help. Trust me without question and if I tell you to do something, then do it. It goes back to trust. I have your best interest at heart. Never talk about the club with anyone, that includes Charity. She is your sister, but she is not Demented Revengers and it will protect her also. If she brings up something Brody has told her avoidance and no statement. I know it will be hard, but it is for her protection. If she knows too much, it will make her a target of our enemies, the less said the better. Respect for the club and me is something else. Whatever you do is a reflection on me and the club.” I see Faith is in deep thought. “The rest, the ol’ ladies will guide you through. You can do this.” Then Faith looks at me. I stay away from the question of why. I don’t know the answer to that except it is for the club.
“You said we had an attraction to each other and I know how I feel about you, even if I try to deny it. You didn’t say how you feel about me. Is this a lifetime commitment or are we just for right now?” This is the question I have been dreading, but I knew it was coming. I keep as close to the truth as I can.
“No one is promised tomorrow. I don’t know what my feelings are for you because I will not let my mind go there. I am a damn biker and I love being a biker, so I don’t sit around thinking about feelings. That is a distraction and here lately distractions get people dead. I am not looking for that to happen to me or my brothers.” I stop and look at the woman I want in my arms and in my bed, but I lie anyway. “I give you today. That is all that is promised to us, and that might be cut short. If we start another day tomorrow, then I will give that to you too. This ride for us is just that, a ride in life. It may be short, or it may be long, but it will never be boring. Can you live with that?” I wait for her answer and every second that ticks by seems endless, but she gives me a nod. “I need the words, babe.”
“I will give it my best shot, Con. I am asking you not to shatter my heart. I have real feelings for you, so please, treat it gently.” I don’t know what to say to that and then I hear someone knock. I walk to the door and unlatch the lock and then open it. Charity is standing there with Brody behind her. I step back and they step inside. I look at Brody and then Charity and shake my head. Brody gives me a nod back and he understands that I convinced Faith.
“Faith accepted my claim. I know that the two of you want to be married as soon as possible but Brody I need a word with you before you make the plans. Shine is calling all the brothers in for a meet and then I am sure he will want to talk to you.” Charity is looking at B
rody and then to me. “I need to get to Shine’s office so if you two could keep Faith company for a little while it would be great.” Then I remember what Katie said. I look at Faith. “Don’t be too long, I am sure Katie will need a hand with the food.”
“Alright.” Faith says and then goes back to hugging Charity and rubbing her belly. I nod one last time at Brody and turn and leave. It’s time to get everything straight before we turn it all over to the brothers and it is time to find all the traitors in our clubhouse and find out the truth about Cap and Javier’s involvement. Then there is that shit with Zig Zag. Another long fucking night.
Chapter Fifteen
Cap
I watch the woman I have loved for over thirty years cry into her pillow. My woman is not a crier, she is a fixer and she has the patience of a saint, but still today I make her cry. This is on me. I should have been a man all those years ago and admitted my weaknesses. I shouldn’t have given the problem to Javier to fix for me, but I did. Now I am going to need to fix the blowback from it. It is time I man up. I toe off my boots and crawl in bed beside my woman to hold her, but Lil goes stiff beside me and won’t let me take her into my arms, so I can fix this. Lil has never denied my touch before and I realize just how much I have hurt her, and she doesn’t even know what I have done yet. Lil sits up and then moves to the edge of the bed to sit and she looks back at me.
“It’s time Jethro and don’t try sparing my feelings, just give me the truth. I have known for years that you and Javier had an agreement and it wasn’t a good one. He kept coming back for money and you gave it to him.” I didn’t know Lil was aware of any of it. “After your sister’s death you were an asshole to most people. I knew you were dealing with your emotions and that is not easy for you as a man or as the biker that you are. I gave you room to work through it without my bitchin’, but I wasn’t blind, deaf, and my sense of smell was right on. I knew damn it, and I allowed it to go on because I loved you. Every time I had a miscarriage it tore me down because I couldn’t give you a child and you tried to console me, but you were running the club. Your brothers and their families needed to be taken care of and I was always the last on that list of things to do, but I learned to live with it.” Lil cries silently as she says this and then she stiffens her back. “While you were gaining territory and chasing skirts, I was at home drowning in sorrow and pity, but I dealt with it. I became a stronger woman, one I thought you would be proud of, but I kept the books for the club and our personal accounts. Did you not ever think I would notice the amount of money that was going to Javier out of our personal account? Did you not ever think that the damn club whores would not rub it in my face?” Lil is waiting for a response.