For a moment her mind flashed back to the previous night. To Grayson’s bright blue gaze. The way he’d studied her face with such intensity. As if everything about her was fascinating. What had he seen? Surely not the worn mother staring out of the mirror.
Honor frowned. Grayson seemed to be taking up too much of her thoughts. She needed to put him out of her mind, focus on getting her life in order.
“Honor?” Candace appeared at the doorway, dressed in a knee-length skirt and blue sweater, her hair pulled back in a sleek ponytail.
“You look like you’re all ready to go. Do you want to drive, or shall I?”
“Actually, I was thinking of driving into Lynchburg and going to church on campus. A lot of my new friends live in the dorms and go to church there.”
“That sounds great.” Honor hoped her bright tone would hide the disappointment she felt at Candace’s words. She knew it was time for her sister-in-law to forge her own path and go her own way, but that didn’t make it any easier to watch. Candace had been a scared teenager with pitch-black lipstick and matching hair when she’d stepped into the little house Honor had shared with Jay. It hadn’t taken long for the young teen to settle in and settle down. A little love and a lot of understanding had done wonders for the kid whom everyone else had given up on.
And now Candace wasn’t a kid, she was an adult with goals and dreams that included Honor in only a peripheral way. The knowledge was bittersweet.
“If you want, I can come to church with you and Lily this week.” Candace must have sensed her thoughts. Her eyes were the same deep blue as Lily’s, the same as Jay’s, but filled with more anxiety than Honor had ever seen in the other two.
“What I want is for you to go and have fun with your friends. Tell me about the church later. Who knows, maybe Lily and I will visit next week.”
“Are you sure? Because I really don’t mind coming with you.”
“Of course, I’m sure.”
“Thanks. You’re the best.” Candace hugged Honor, holding her tight for a moment before she disappeared back in her room and closed the door. Not Honor’s daughter or sister, but as much a part of her life as any blood relation could ever be. Honor really would miss her when she finally moved out of the house.
Of course Honor had always known that Candace would eventually grow up and grow away. That was part of life, as natural as heat in the summer and as predictable as the tide. Honor didn’t expect or want it to be any different. When the time came for Lily to have a life on her own, Honor hoped she would accept it just as pragmatically. The house would be empty, then. And Honor would be alone.
The thought wasn’t comforting, and for the first time since Jay’s death, Honor wondered if her decision to stay single was the best one. If maybe finding someone to spend her life with wouldn’t be such a bad thing.
She pushed the thought aside, refusing to dwell on it. No matter what the future brought, Honor wouldn’t be alone. God was always with her, His presence true and sure. That was enough.
It had to be.
NINE
The phone rang as Grayson was taking a sip of his second cup of coffee. He answered quickly, knowing the only people that would call him early Sunday morning were family. Or Honor.
Had something else happened at the Malone house?
“Hello?”
“Gray? It’s Dad.”
Grayson tensed at his father’s voice, worried that he might be calling with bad news about Jude’s progress. “Hey, Dad. Is everything okay?”
“As good as can be expected. The doctors are saying Jude will be here another two weeks at least.”
“That’s not good news.”
“No, but it’s better than the alternative.”
“Very true. How’s Jude taking things?”
“You know your brother. He’s fighting everyone and everything.”
“Good for him.”
“Yeah. As long as he’s fighting, I figure he’ll be okay.”
“Listen, do you guys need me to come back up there? If you do, I’m on my way.” As he spoke, his gaze was drawn to the window above his sink. From there he could see the roof of Honor’s house. The thought of leaving before Jake caught the person who’d been peeking in her window last night filled Grayson with a sick sense of helplessness. The same way he’d felt when he’d been told about his brother’s accident.
“Right now, we need you there more. The rental has got to be ready when Jude is released. We’ve got a rehab set up in Lynchburg, doctors, everything he’ll need.”
“I’ll keep things moving along here, then. Just keep me posted on his progress.” Relieved, Grayson rinsed his coffee cup and put it in the dishwasher.
“I will. Listen, I’ve got to go. We’re heading out to church in a bit. Mom wants to get as many people praying as we can.”
“Good idea.”
“Yeah. We’ve already contacted our church in Forest. Make sure you ask your church to pray, too.”
“I will, Dad.” Though he hadn’t actually planned to go to church.
“Thanks, Gray. I’ll call you again soon.”
Grayson hung up the phone, and ran a hand down his jaw. He’d have to shave if he went to church, and he’d have to dig out his Bible. He frowned at the realization. It had been too long since he’d immersed himself in God’s word and too long since he’d taken the time to attend services. A month at least.
Where had the time gone?
His church his father had called it, but even years ago, when Grayson had been attending regularly, it hadn’t felt like that. That probably had more to do with Grayson than with the people at Grace Christian. It wasn’t that they hadn’t tried to make him part of the church family. It was more that he’d been too busy pursuing other goals to participate in the men’s Bible studies, men’s breakfasts and the many other activities he’d been invited to.
Guilt reared its ugly head, and Grayson had no choice but to acknowledge it. Church hadn’t been important to Maria, and Grayson hadn’t pushed the point. During the years they’d dated, he’d gotten out of the habit of regular attendance. Seven months after breaking up with her, he still hadn’t gotten back into the routine.
He needed to. He knew it and glanced at the clock, calculating the time it would take him to shower, shave and get ready for church. If he hurried, he might just make it there before the service began.
Grayson pulled into the parking lot of Grace Christian Church with five minutes to spare. Organ music drifted into the corridor and mixed with the sound of happy conversation as he hurried down the hall and pushed open the sanctuary door. The room was packed, most of the pews filled, people talking and laughing as they waited for the service to begin. Grayson searched for his brother Tristan and Tristan’s wife, Martha. He didn’t see either of them. A few pews near the front looked like they might have room for one more, and Grayson moved toward them, pausing when he caught a glimpse of deep black hair and rosy skin.
Honor.
Her name filled his head and lodged in his heart.
She looked lovely, her hair down and spilling around her shoulders in a silky curtain of black.
She glanced his way as he approached, her eyes widening, her lips turning down in a slight frown. “Grayson. I wasn’t expecting to see you today.”
“Does that mean you’d rather I not sit with you?”
She was too polite to say yes, and Grayson knew it.
“It just means I’m surprised.”
“Why are you surprised?”
“Because you seem like the kind of person who is too busy to bother with church.”
Ouch! She’d hit the nail on the head with that one, and Grayson wasn’t afraid to admit it. “I’ve had a lapse in attendance, but realized this morning it was time to come back.”
“Because of your brother?”
“Partly, but mostly because of me. There are more important things than work. I think it’s past time I started paying attention to them.”
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She looked up at him, her gaze intense, as if she were weighing the truth of his response.
Finally, she smiled. “You’re serious.”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
“I thought maybe you had found out I was coming, and decided to do the same.” Her cheeks turned pink as she said it, and Grayson laughed softly.
“I had no idea you’d be here. If I had, I would have arrived sooner.”
Honor smiled and shook her head. “You’re incorrigible.”
“I try. So—” he paused and gestured to the pew “—are you going to let me sit?”
Her cheeks grew even redder, and she scooted over, making room for him. The clean fragrant scent of her perfume drifted in the air as he sat beside her. Summery and light, it tugged at Grayson’s senses, tempting him to move closer.
He didn’t, but only because he thought doing so might send Honor running.
The pastor’s sermon on faith during trials touched Grayson’s soul, and he prayed fervently during the benediction. For himself and his weakened faith. For his brother’s recovery. For Honor. When the last strains of the final hymn faded away, he stepped into the aisle, waiting for Honor and walking out of the sanctuary with her.
“That was a wonderful sermon, wasn’t it?” Honor’s eyes glowed, and she looked more relaxed than Grayson had ever seen her.
“It was definitely something I needed to hear.”
“Me, too. Sometimes it’s so hard to understand why things happen. Knowing that God is in control of it all makes it much easier to bear.” That she could say that after all she’d been through touched Grayson’s heart as few things had. This was real faith. This was true relationship with God. Something alive and vital and real.
“You’re a special woman, Honor.”
“No more special than anyone else.” She brushed a hand over her hair, and he knew his comment had made her uncomfortable. “I need to go get Lily.”
“And Candace?”
“She went to a church at the university.” Honor smiled, but Grayson couldn’t miss the sadness in her eyes.
“You miss having her with you.”
“Of course, but she’s an adult. It’s time for her to step out on her own. Now, I really do have to get Lily. Who knows what kind of trouble she’s caused this morning.”
She hurried away.
Grayson started to follow her, but was pulled up short by an elderly woman who wanted to discuss suing the county for not maintaining her yard. Grayson spent the next five minutes explaining that it wasn’t the county’s responsibility, then walked outside.
The air was bitter and cold, whipping against his cheeks and stealing his breath. He could go home and work, but the thought didn’t appeal to him. He could drive to Lynchburg and check on the rental property that his brother would be using, but the contractors weren’t scheduled to begin work until Monday.
Which left him with plenty to do but no desire to do any of it.
“Mister. Hey, Mister Prince!”
Grayson recognized Lily’s voice immediately, and he scanned the parking lot until he spotted her a few yards away.
Dressed in a fluffy pink coat and hat, her cheeks red from the cold, she was pulling against Honor’s hold and trying desperately to move toward him.
“Hello, Princess Lily.” He smiled and walked toward her, ignoring Honor’s uneasy expression.
“I’m not a princess.”
“No?”
“Mommy is. And she needs a prince to save her from the dragon.”
“I see.” He met Honor’s eyes, and smiled as she blushed.
“I do not need a prince, young lady. What I need is some Tylenol.” Honor shook her head, and tugged Lily toward an old Ford. “This child just does not know when to quit.”
“I don’t have any Tylenol, but I could offer lunch. That might do just as much to get rid of your headache.”
“Headache? I’ve got an entire body ache.” She opened the car door and motioned for Lily to get into her booster.
“Food will help.”
“Don’t tell me that you actually believe that.”
“What I believe is that good food and interesting conversation can solve a multitude of problems.”
“I appreciate the offer, Grayson, but I’m not hungry.”
“Big breakfast?”
“Mommy didn’t eat breakfast.” Lily peeked out the open car door.
“Lily, I said to get in your booster.” Honor’s exasperation was obvious, and Grayson bit back a smile.
“It seems to me that hunger can cause headaches. But you’re the nurse. Maybe you’ve heard something different.”
“We’re both busy—”
“And we both need to eat.” He linked his fingers with hers, tugging her a step closer so that he could see the flecks of gold in her eyes, feel her quick intake of breath.
“Grayson—”
“It’s just lunch, Honor.”
“Why does it feel like more?”
“Because that’s where we’re heading. For now, though, it’s just a meal between friends.”
She hesitated, and he was sure she’d say no. Then she glanced at her daughter, frowning slightly. “It will make Lily’s day if we go to lunch with you.”
“Then come.”
“All right. But I’m taking my own car and I’m paying for my meal and Lily’s.”
“Taking your own car makes sense. We’ll discuss who’s paying the bill after we eat.”
“We’ll discuss it now, or we won’t go at all.” Her lips were set in a tight line, her eyes flashing.
“You’re beautiful when you’re irritated, you know that?”
“And you’re a man who knows exactly what to say to get what he wants.”
“Compliments make you uncomfortable, don’t they?”
“I’ve learned that the sweeter the compliment the more bitter the deception that follows.”
“Deception? What kind of men have you been dating?” The question slipped out before Grayson could stop it, and Honor stiffened, reaching into the car to buckle her daughter’s straps, then shutting the door before responding.
“I don’t date. I don’t have time for it. But I was married to a man whose words were sweet cream and warm sunshine. He used them to convince anyone of anything.” She spoke quietly, her words devoid of emotion.
“He doesn’t sound like a very nice guy.” And not the kind of man Grayson thought a woman like Honor would be attracted to.
“Jay was a wonderful guy. Sweet, funny, imaginative.”
“And a deceiver.”
“Not in his mind. In his mind, he was painting prettier pictures of the way things were and making his life better in the process.”
“Deception is deception, regardless of the reasons.”
“You don’t have to tell me that, Grayson. I know it. And I know the damage it can do.” She smiled sadly. “Jay wasn’t a bad person. He was just Jay…It looks like my daughter is getting restless. We’d better get to lunch. Where were you planning to eat?”
“Becky’s Diner. Do you know it?”
“Know it? We ate there once, and Lily has been begging me to bring her back ever since.”
“Then she should be very happy. See you there?”
“Yes.” She got into her car, closing the door and pulling away, Lily strapped into her car seat in the back, waving wildly.
Seeing the little girl there, her cheeks still chubby with baby fat, her eyes wide and filled with happiness, made Grayson’s heart clench. Innocence and life wrapped up in a tiny package, Lily was the kind of child who went through life with pure excitement and enthusiasm. The kind of child who could easily be hurt by one of the many predators who wandered through the world looking for victims.
He walked back to his car, more determined then ever to make sure Honor and her family stayed safe.
TEN
Honor hurried Lily across the nearly full parking lot of Becky’s Diner, irritated with
herself for falling into Grayson’s plans. Lunch with him was a bad idea. A really bad one. Yet here she was, doing exactly what she knew she shouldn’t.
“Mommy, are you sure Mister Prince is having lunch with us?” Lily bounced next to her, her cheeks glowing pink from the cold.
“Mr. Sinclair is having lunch with us. And that is what I would like you to call him.”
“I will.”
“And no more talk about him being a prince, or slaying dragons or having a horse. Okay?” Honor looked down into Lily’s face and tried to force sternness into her voice. Despite the trouble it often caused, Honor loved the quirky side of her daughter’s personality. It was so much like Jay’s. So much a part of what had attracted Honor to him.
“All right, Mommy.”
“And no calling me a princess, either. Because we both know I’m not one. If I were, I’d have ball gowns in my closet instead of work uniforms, and I’d wear glass slippers on my feet instead of sneakers.”
“We could get you ball gowns and glass slippers.”
“No, we couldn’t. But we can get a nice sandwich and a cup of soup for me and something yummy for you.”
“Chicken nuggets and fries?”
“Sure.” They stepped into the diner and were seated in a booth near the front window of the busy restaurant. From there, Honor had a view of the parking lot and the people walking and driving through it. She imagined Grayson would drive up in something fancy. Maybe a shiny new sports car. A Jaguar. A Corvette. Something showy, like his house.
When a mid-sized charcoal sedan pulled into a parking space, Honor ignored it, turning her attention to the red Corvette that zipped into another space farther away. She was so sure Grayson was going to get out of it, she had to look twice when a short, balding man emerged.
The Protector's Promise (The Sinclair Brothers) Page 7