“He made it pretty clear there wasn’t.”
“I’m sorry,” said Lacey softly.
Geena swallowed. “The worst thing is, I think I love him.” She’d never said it out loud before, but the truth rang loud and clear. She wasn’t just in love with Damien, she was over-the-moon, bat-shit crazy for him. Imagining life without him was like looking through a tunnel that descended into endless blackness. Nothing felt right without him. And maybe it never would.
But at least now she’d admitted how she felt and she’d move on from there. No more hiding from it. The honest admission was a relief.
“Here comes your mother,” said Lacey.
Geena groaned. One of the things causing the waterworks had been her mother’s shining eyes, the look of pride on her face as Ally said, “I do.” Their mother had never looked at Geena like that. And never would.
She grabbed a glass of bubbles from a passing waiter’s tray and took a gulp. Stop it, Geena. You couldn’t be happier for Ally. Don’t you dare let any petty jealousy get in the way of that.
Geena lowered her voice so there was no chance her mother would hear. “She’s determined to set me up with someone she thinks is right for me. Which means someone rich. Thing is, the fact Damien has lots of money just got in the way. I think I’d be better off with someone as poor as I am.”
“You should tell her how you feel,” said Lacey. “Stop letting her make you unhappy.”
Geena studied her mother. Maybe Lacey was right. What was that saying? The truth will set you free. She’d felt better after admitting the truth about Damien, so perhaps she should talk honestly to her mother. But first she knocked back all the champagne in her glass. She’d need all the courage she could get.
“Darling, there you are,” said her mother. “I thought you were going to go brown?” She gave Geena’s hair a disappointed look.
Geena raised her chin defiantly. She wore a fitted red bridesmaid dress from the early 1960s. Its tiny cap sleeves hid nothing, and she’d died her hair a defiant, unapologetic, bright red to match.
Last night she’d hung out with Ally, celebrating her sister’s final night of being unmarried. They’d chosen the color together. It had made her feel good, getting rid of that boring brown. Back to her real self again.
“I did go brown, but Ally likes this better.” She sipped her champagne. “And so do I.”
Her mother sighed. “We’ve seated you next to one of Max’s movie star friends. Please be polite.”
“I’ve met him.” Geena wrinkled her nose. “I’m sure he’s very nice, but he’s not my type.”
“Well, there are lots of other rich, handsome actors here.” Undaunted, she indicated a man over Geena’s shoulder. “Wasn’t he in that movie with Max? The one about the president?”
Geena turned to look. For a moment she caught a glimpse of Damien’s dark hair and wide shoulders and her heart turned over. But no. It was Max’s co-star from his last movie, a star who’d made her drool in the cinema, especially when he’d taken his shirt off to reveal a perfect body. But now he got the same reaction from her body as Rowan had. He was good looking, sure. But he wasn’t Damien.
Suddenly she felt like crying again. Breathing deeply, she fought the tears away. Hold it together, Geena. She’d already spent half the day in the ladies room fixing her mascara.
“Go and talk to him,” her mother urged.
“I’d rather talk to you,” said Geena.
Lacey gave her an encouraging nod and smile, then moved away out of earshot.
Geena twisted her hands together, wishing a waiter would come past so she could grab another drink. “I want you to know that I’m happy with who I am, and I’m not going to change.” She took a deep breath, studying her mother’s expression. In spite of the flutters in her stomach, she had to get this out. If she didn’t say it now, she never would. “I’ll never be the person you want me to be. I’m afraid you’re always going to be disappointed that I don’t fit your mold. But I’m actually starting to feel okay about that. I like myself, and other people like me too. That’s enough for me.”
Her mother blinked several times, a look of confusion on her face. “But darling, why do you think I’m disappointed with you?”
Geena frowned. “You don’t like the way I look, you’re ashamed of what I do, and you’re disappointed I don’t have a rich boyfriend. And that’s just for starters.”
“But just because I want the best for you, doesn’t mean I don’t love you. The opposite. It’s because I love you so much that I want you to have everything.”
“On your terms,” Geena pointed out. “You don’t take into consideration what I want.”
Her mother reached for her and Geena was so surprised she almost took a step back. But she let her mother pull her into a hug. It took her several seconds before she’d recovered enough to hug her mother back.
“I’m proud of you, darling.” Her mother’s soft murmur made Geena’s heart turn over. “You may not see it, but I am. You’ve had your own set of opinions since you were a girl, and they’ve always been different from mine. But you do things your own way, and I can hardly complain when you’re just like my mother.” She let Geena go and stepped backwards. “You’re so much like your gran that I know if she were here, you two would have ganged up on me.” She smiled. “Gran was every bit as stubborn as you are. Her and I used to butt heads all the time, so maybe I’m used to that. But I wish I could convince you to see things my way sometimes. I’m sure you’d be so much happier.”
Geena’s mouth opened and then closed again. It didn’t matter that her mother wasn’t going to back down about telling her what she should do. She’d never said she was proud of her before, and it felt good to hear.
“I love you, Ma.”
“We’d better go and see if the photographer is ready for us.” Her mother looked around. “Where on earth is that planner woman? Honestly, I told Ally she was hopeless, but does your sister listen to me? I may as well be talking to myself most of the time.”
Geena walked with her mother, feeling a little dizzy. Why had she waited so long to tell her mother how she really felt? It had turned out to be so much easier than she’d imagined. Even if nothing changed as a result, she felt good about it. Stronger, somehow. More confident. And even more certain that she’d never give up who she was, or quit working her hardest to make the store she loved a success.
Not even if it meant she’d lost Damien forever.
23
Damien was with his team, looking over their scale model of the entertainment center and getting ready to go into the council chambers, when somebody slapped him on the back. He turned and did a double-take when he saw Zac. “What are you doing here?” he exclaimed.
“Moral support. This is make or break time, right?” Zac motioned to the heavy double doors of the council chambers. Inside, a panel of councilors was hearing final submissions for Sydney’s new entertainment center. “What time do you go in?”
“Half an hour.” Damien smiled, glad to see his friend. Zac must have meant what he said about rejoining the world, and his being here was a damn good sign. He’d spent far too long shut up in his house on the cliff.
“I saw your superhero video, by the way,” said Zac. “Laughed my ass off.”
Damien grimaced. He’d even caught Isobelle humming the Batman theme song. “Great,” he muttered. Beside him, Rosalind turned a chuckle into a cough.
“At least they’re saying nice things about you for a change.” Zac widened his eyes into an innocent expression. “Hey, if you wear your underpants outside your trousers, the council are sure to give you the deal.”
One of his architects snorted. Damien cast narrowed eyes around his team. Most wouldn’t meet his gaze and several had their lips pressed together to hold in laughter.
“Let’s go to the café downstairs and grab a coffee.” Damien led Zac away from the group.
“Mr. Courtney, may I get you both a drink?” Ro
salind kept her hand over her mouth to hide her grin.
“We can manage. You stay here with the others. Away from Zac,” he added under his breath.
They sat at a corner table in the café, and the waiter brought over two coffees.
“Judging by your model, your design for the entertainment center looks every bit as good as you said it was. I’m sure you’ll get the contract.” Zac poured sugar into his coffee and stirred it thoughtfully. “So the woman in the video is the sex shop owner you were helping?”
“How’d you know?”
“I asked Rosalind.”
Damien sighed. So much for his privacy. “Yeah, that’s Geena. We had a thing for a while, but it didn’t work out.”
“Oh?”
“Her store is in the middle of King’s Cross, near the Kingston.”
“So?”
“You know those men are still out there, and I can’t protect her. She won’t be protected.” Damien picked up his coffee and put it down again without tasting it. “I asked her to move her store and she said no. If she’s going to keep deliberately putting herself in danger, I can’t be around her. I couldn’t take it if something happened to her too.”
Zac frowned. “So you gave her an ultimatum, she said no, and you walked?”
Damien picked up his coffee again and this time managed to take a sip before he answered. “That isn’t the way I would have put it, but I suppose it’s a crude summary of what happened.”
“And if she’d given you an ultimatum? If she’d asked you to move your entertainment center out of the city? What then?”
“Building the entertainment center isn’t going to put me in danger.”
“That’s not the point.”
Dammit, Damien hated it when Zac was so rational. And right. “Can you be any more irritating?” he asked.
Zac laughed. “Yes, as a matter of fact I can. Shall we talk about Cilla?”
Damien froze. What about her? Her funeral was the last time they’d talked about her, and they’d both been nearly incoherent with shock and grief.
“The two of you were dating,” Zac continued. He sounded matter-of-fact, but the way he avoided Damien’s eyes and toyed with the empty sugar packet showed that he was more uncomfortable than he let on. “She told me about it.”
It took Damien several moments to find his voice. “What? When?” That wasn’t possible. Cilla had been adamant that Zac could never know.
“The night she died. She called before she went out and told me she was in love with you, and that you loved her back.”
“The night she went to the Kingston?” Damien felt cold all over. She’d called Zac? But he’d never said a word about it. “What exactly did she say?”
“She told me everything. That you’d been seeing each other and that you’d broken up with her because she didn’t want to tell me. She wanted it all out in the open so you two could be together.”
Damien sucked in a deep breath. This was the last thing he’d expected. “Weren’t you angry?”
“Furious. Shocked, Betrayed.” Zac gave a humorless laugh. “But I calmed down pretty quickly.” Finally he lifted his gaze from the sugar packet and met Damien’s eyes. “She loved you. And if you were the guy who could make her happy, then so be it. I mean, I wasn’t happy you had sex with my sister.” He frowned. “Not cool, man. But if you were in love with her then I decided I could live with it.”
“I was,” said Damien simply. The remnants of that love still ached. Now the shock of Zac’s revelation was wearing off, it occurred to him that it had been exactly the kind of thing Cilla would do, calling her brother out of the blue to confess everything. She’d been crazy and brave and unpredictable. He’d loved that about her, hadn’t he?
But even as he thought it, Geena’s face filled his mind. Geena’s sweet scent, her biting wit. The way her business had been collapsing around her and she’d still rushed out to buy him a new tie. Geena was crazy and brave and unpredictable. She was also smart, generous, and funny. Geena was uniquely Geena and comparing her to Cilla wasn’t fair to either woman.
I’m in love with Geena. The thought hit him like a punch. No. I can’t let myself be in love with her. I can’t keep her safe.
“Cilla only went out that night because I split up with her.” Damien’s voice was rough. “She went to the Kingston because of me. Because I broke her heart.”
Zac shook his head. “You’re wrong. She told me about your relationship because she knew it was the only thing keeping you two apart. She knew you’d take her back.” He sighed. “But I was in denial. She’d been invited out with some friends and I told her she should go and let her hair down. I was half hoping she’d meet someone else, so I wouldn’t have to deal with the fact she was dating my best friend.” He shook his head. “For the last two years I’ve replayed that conversation in my mind, wishing I hadn’t encouraged her to go and party that night. I knew what she was like. I should have told her to stay home.”
“You couldn’t have known how reckless she’d be.”
“Neither could you. See, you haven’t had a monopoly on guilt. I’ve had plenty of my own to deal with.” Zac gave him a weak smile. “Why do you think I’ve shut myself away for so long? Funny how we were both so set on blaming ourselves for Cilla’s death. But now it’s time for us to get over ourselves. It was her choice to go to that boarding house to buy drugs and it was a stupid decision. But she isn’t dead because of anything either of us did.”
Damien uncurled his fists and rubbed his clammy hands down the front of his jeans. “Maybe you’re right.”
Rosalind hurried into the café. “Mr. Courtney? They’re ready for us.”
Damien stayed where he was, looking at Zac. “We should have talked about this before,” he said. “Why didn’t we?”
Zac shrugged. “Maybe if she hadn’t died so badly we would have.”
“Yeah,” Damien said softly. “But it’s been two years, Zac.”
“Too long,” his friend agreed.
Damien heaved a breath. “Two years of driving ourselves crazy is more than enough. There’ll always be a place in my heart for Cilla, but it’s time to move on. Time to let her go.” He stood up and nodded to Rosalind. “Come on, let’s go win this thing.”
24
After the talk they’d had, Geena thought it was only fair she make her mother happy by dancing with Rowan the movie star. Turned out he was a pretty good dancer. And with the band playing some old-school rock which just happened to be her favorite, she even managed to come up with some smiles that weren’t fakes.
Rowan spun her around until she was dizzy. As the song came to an end, he dipped her backwards. Laughing, she thrust one hand into the air theatrically.
A familiar voice spoke from behind her.
“May I have the next dance?”
She jerked up, nearly falling on her ass in the process. “Damien?”
He nodded grimly at Rowan. “Do you mind?”
“Be my guest.”
“But you don’t dance,” said Geena. She was frozen to the spot. What was he doing here? Shouldn’t he be in a council meeting trying to get them to let him build his entertainment center?
“I do today.” He held out one hand in invitation, and without considering what she was doing, she stepped forward to grip it. The band started playing a slow song and he slid one arm around her waist and pulled her closer. He swayed in time with the music and she moved with him, her body melding to his.
“You hate dancing,” she murmured, because she was so confused she couldn’t think of what else to say. “You said it was pointless.”
“Amazingly enough, I’m starting to understand the point.” He tightened his arm around her. “I may not be very good at it, but I’ll dance with you anytime. Especially if it means you can’t dance with anyone else.”
Geena blinked. Had he been jealous of Rowan? The feel of his body against hers was overwhelming. Was he real? She’d been longing for him so badly
she could almost have conjured him up.
“Damien, what are you doing here? How did you get in past the bouncers?” Silly question. There wasn’t a force on earth that could stop Damien when he wanted something.
“Magnum spoke to the security team and got the okay from your sister.”
Who’s Magnum? Geena sucked in her breath, too stunned to ask. She wanted to remember every single thing about this moment. From the familiar scent of his aftershave, to the slight roughness of his suit, the way his hand felt against the curve of her waist, to the hint of shadow on his chin. This moment was all she could allow herself to have.
“I’m sorry, Damien.” She wished she didn’t have to say the words. Hated herself for not dragging out this precious moment of hope for as long as she could. “I’m sorry, but nothing’s changed. I won’t move my store.”
“I know.”
“Then you’re here to say goodbye?” She swallowed. “I wish you hadn’t come. It just makes it harder.” Damn tears, she wouldn’t let them out. She absolutely, categorically refused to cry in front of him.
“Actually, I’m here to remind you that we have at least a hundred toys we still need to test.”
She stopped dancing and stared at him. “What?”
“I didn’t want to love you, Geena. But I do anyway.” He smiled and lifted a strand of her hair. “And by the way, this color suits you. You look beautiful.”
“You… what?” Did he say he loved her?
“I kept pushing you away because you’re so impulsive. You can be a little reckless. But those same qualities attracted me too. It took me a while to realize that I don’t want someone who’s safe, someone who I can control. I’m in love with you, Geena. And I don’t want you to change.”
Her mouth opened and closed. “You love me?”
“Yes.”
“And you don’t want me to move my store?”
“I get why The Gee Spot is so important to you where it is, and I’d far rather worry about you than not have you in my life at all.” His lips twitched. “Besides, after seeing how you dealt with Scarface’s buddy, I don’t think I should worry about you anymore. It’s anyone who tries to rob you that I’m afraid for.”
The Rich List Series: Contemporary Romance Box Set (Millionaire, Billionaire, CEO) Page 36